First Kiss

 

It should be his heart beating faster than mine.

I looked at him as he stares at me with worried eyes.

He was grasping some breath just now and I remember how he looked similar at that time in the train station. He did call my name too and like how he appeared as if trying to catch up with something.

Before I thought about what made him look like that... I can't say it's because of me. I wonder what kind of something that is.

But right now that he's looking straight into my eyes, it’s safe to assume that who he's trying to reach out was me, right?

 

Then I learned something the moment he touched me... when he placed his hand on my cheek.

I learned that the irregular palpitations I constantly experience when I'm with him aren’t caused by coffee or any caffeine.

I learned why I feel like melting when he stares at me at times.

I learned how come I feel electrified with his casual touch

I learned that I... have fallen for him already since then.

"Don't go to places where I can't see you" Chanyeol told me.

Yea. I won't. Let me stay beside you always where you can see me all the time.

 

 

 

Now I can't sleep next to Chanyeol.

Morelike, it's hard to sleep when he's right next to me.

So why am I caught up in this kind of situation anyway?

But the one who asked to sleep together... wasn't it me?

Because I simply love being next to him... he's the one who told me not to go anywhere far from him...

 

It's unusual for my roommate to wake up before me so I kind of feel different when I'm alone in the room this morning. It's really early for the members to get up now so no wonder no one's around when I went out the room and passed by the living room area. I heard some voices coming from the kitchen. I went to take a peek at what's happening there too--

Kyungsoo is checking the rice cooker. Here I found Chanyeol too but he's busy cooking at the moment. There's also Kai whose arms were hung around Kyungsoo's shoulders... huh? yup, Kai is the one who tends to woke up early to go straight the practice room; so what is he doing here in the kitchen instead?

Isn't it obvious? He's fencing Kyungsoo around.

I think it started sometime when Chanyeol made a harebrained joke that Kyungsoo would make a good wife, since then I noticed Kai taking caution of those two. I just hope I won't be dragged along too.

I went behind Chanyeol and peek from his side. "What are you making?... Seaweed soup?..."

"You awake?" he asked rhetorically

"No. I'm just sleepwalking and talking" to which I wittingly answered

"Geez, you sit down for a while" He led me to the table and gave me a cup of soup

"But why seaweed soup? Anyone's celebrating birthday today?"

"Hyung I also think you're just sleep-talking" Kai started and Kyungsoo softly laughs as he sat across me

Before I could answer back, my phone rings and it's from Kris hyung. I answered it first but it's actually Tao's who on the other line. His voice sounds as if he's still lying in bed and 'course he's trying his best to speak in Korean:

 

"Hyung, happy birthday... Was I the first one to greet you today? I wanted to be that's why I work up very early and borrowed Kris' phone for a while. International calls cost a lot.."

We chatted for a while before disconnecting the call. Then I looked at Kyungsoo, next to Kai and finally to Chanyeol. They are all smiling at me.

 

"It's your birthday today, Bacon" the latter, who is sitting next to me, added as he brushes my fringe.

 

How ironic.

Tao's greeting made me happy and touched.

But Chanyeol's made me nervous and blush.

 

"Oh. Eh?... Ah, Right. Today..."

Ah... what should I do... I don't think I can hide my emotions towards him properly

It just shows.

Jongin and Kyungsoo said they need to stop by the company early so they went ahead leaving Chanyeol and I alone.

"Happy birthday, Baekhyun." he greeted with a smile.

 

It's my 20th birthday.

Chanyeol cooked a seaweed soup for me.

And just him eating here with me this morning is enough to make my day special.

 

 

 

After our performance stage in Musicbank, the K-members left me alone in the dressing room for a while and came back with a cake and some party poppers

I kinda expected them to do that... our members love flashy stuffs like these.

Some coordinator noonas and production staffs also joined singing me a birthday song

Celebrating a birthday during a music show isn't my style but this is really something that I won't forget... I swear!

They even made me watch a video record of the M-members. Since they're also promoting in China at the moment, they can't be here with us so they just sent their message through a video. The Chinese hyungs are so sweet. If only this isn't a recording, I would've cried.

"Anything you'd like to say to the members?" Prod. noona asked

"I... I thank everyone who shared some of their time for me... and I won't forget this best birthday ever." I answered like how other idols would answer when asked, very cliche but it's straight from the heart.

But to my surprise, I started adding, "Especially to my fellow members... I really really love you guys... and Chanyeol..." I let out a little chuckle before continuing, "who is very sweet... the first friend I had here..."

The other members started whistling and I slightly sneak a glance at Yeol

"Oh, was he also the closest member to you?" Prod. noona asked again

"Ah, yea... the first time I met him, we exchanged stares for around ten seconds and I feel something just told me that 'it's him!'--"

Before I could even continue, the members already pushed me beside Chanyeol who I think is blushing for real and they started cheering,

"Marry him! Marry him! Marry him!"

I widely smiled at how Chanyeol is acting shy all of a sudden. And to my amusement, I shouted,

"Mom! I'm going to marry~!"

As Chanyeol buries his face on my shoulders while letting out a nervous laugh

 

 

 

He took my hand and pulled me close to him

"Hyung, we'll just drop by somewhere for a while." Chanyeol asked manager-hyung

"Aish... just don't cause headache or trouble later on" Manager hyung reminded

The members are already used to us sneaking at times when Chanyeol and I feel like it.

"And be sure to take Baekhyun home back!" Sehun teased

 

 

To my surprise, we didn't go to watch movie on the last full show or eat at the ramyun shop near our dorm like how we usually do.

He brought me at the train station instead.

"Y-yah! Where are we going?!" I asked as I pulled my hand a bit hesitatingly

"Let's try the last round trip..." He chuckled... and he's damn cute.

No more heart flicks please. It's fine already. I would go wherever you wanted to go.

Sure it'll be the end of me if I said that, so I just ask,

"What if they'd recognize us?"

"Don't worry; you don't have your eyeliner on so it's impossible"

"Yah!"

 

The spring breeze blew on us while we were waiting for the approaching train.

Cool enough to give me a chill. I watch him beside me for a second at the corner of my eye

And I tried imitating the scene that I often see in dramas...

"I like you."

Slyly confessing my love good enough for him not to hear because the train's noise perfectly got in the way

"What did you say? The train is loud..." as I expected him to answer

"I said, ok, let’s go!" this time, it's me who hold his hand and drag him inside the train

 

 

 

Good thing there are only a number of people inside, most of them are middle-aged salary men.

"I suddenly remembered meeting you here a year ago... so I decided to try this with you once again" Chanyeol shared while we were sitting inside the train

I actually did remember that encounter too...

"And I miss simple hang outs like this with you. I often do this during trainee days to relieve stress so I'm sharing this secret with you..."

"As a birthday gift?"

"Oh, speaking of gifts, here." He lent me his phone and a video started playing... the first person to show in the screen was a Jongdae with both eyes closed as he speaks,

"I don't know what time is there now in Seoul but you know we're some hours earlier here in China right?..." Then the video shows he slowly opened his eyes and continued, "...Happy birthday Baekhyun-ah, we actually recorded a video message for you already last night for the broadcast but Chanyeol insisted to make one right now, he's been ringing us since the clock hit 12... That’s why I don't wear any make-up on... what do you think? And how about having bacon for breakfast?"

Another shot came right after to show Tao with puffy swollen eyes... aww, poor panda, he probably just woke up,

"Baekhyun-hyung... shengil chukkahae, saranghae... Kris and I bought you a gift... ah sorry hyung but may I go back to sleep for a while?. I'll call you later instead."

I laughed at our maknae's aegyo then I turned to Chanyeol for a minute to ask, "Yah, what time did you exactly ask them to do this?"

"Just this morning... at 6... So it's approximately 2-3am in China..."

"You..."

"Baekhyun-ah! Happy birthday! Saranghae~! Please lead a happy life... Minseok said he'll cook bacon for breakfast" Luhan hyung added while sitting next to Minseok hyung as the next cut in the video

"Hey, what's up? Happy birthday Baekhyun! I love you lots. Take care." Hyung said it in English... good thing he already stopped there or I don't think I'll be able to catch what he's saying

I didn't wonder why Yixing hyung didn't have a cut here cuz he's probably still sleeping like a log that time... and no one dares to freakin wake him up cuz  he's in' scary in the morning that we can't imagine how much more if it's before dawn

The next cut is already from D.O., "Baekhyun-ah, happy birthday! Right now, I'm preparing breakfast with Chanyeol. Look how he looks good with apron. He's busy cooking seaweed soup. I know you'll like it since it's full of love."

 

"Uri Baekhyun-ah... happy birthday... ummm... what else... you already know right? I love you alot..."

 

 

 

 

Chanyeol is being weird.

He would sleep on the coach or in Kai and Kyungsoo's room. He even gets jumpy when I sit next to him in the car or anywhere else. We would go laughing but all of a sudden he'd cover his mouth and slightly turn away.

Recently, he feels  d i s t a n t .

"What are you doing here?" I asked him while I sit on the floor next to the coach he naps on.

"It's too hot there... you're raising the heater's temperature so high..."

"But it's so cold here... if I lowered the heater down... will you go inside?"

"Umm..." He looked at me in the eyes, strained a smile, and answered.

L i a r . Even so, I know you won't.

That is why I dragged you still though it's against your will.

 

 

Oh no. Could it be that he already found out my feelings for him?

It's easy to see anyway. I bet I was busted by the other members too; it would be weird if Chanyeol, the main person concerned, would be the last one to notice.

Scary. I never knew that him, finding out about it, could be this scary.

 

He fidgets as he sat on his bed and I put the chair across him, sit, and took his hand

It hesitated a bit but his face clearly showed how he feels like backing miles away.

"What's the matter Chanyeol-ah?" I needed to ask.

"Can we... it may sound rude but... please don't come close to me"

 

Oh. wait. WHAT?

 

"Oh. It IS rude. Fine!" I immediately answered as I dropped holding his hand 'fore mine turned cold.

"Baek... no..." he tried to reach me but I shifted my face away.

"I see... was I suffocating you or something? No, just tell me what's making you awkward..."

He didn't know it afterall. I thought he knew how I felt about him but now that he's acting like this, I figured out; he doesn't have a slightest clue.

Because the Chanyeol I knew won't hurt me this way. He's not that kind of person though he is the only one who could be.

"Baek, listen to me first... this isn't what you think..."

"What do you think I am thinking? Well, I'm sorry if I didn't notice it til now... that it came to the point where you really need to hit it to me straight--"

"I told you to listen first..." he butts with a higher voice

 

I wanted to listen to him. But my mouth won't stop speaking. I hate myself when I act like this too.

"Was it really a burden that I lik---"

Since I can't do it myself, he did the honor of making me stop and that is by...

 

A   k i s s  ...

Is what Chanyeol gave me to shut me up,

Because I didn't listen when I heard him told me to do so

But I doubt that he can now make me... for all I can hear are the massive loud thumps echoing on my ears every time my heart would pound heavily crazy.

He slowly breaks away from the kiss. His hand that was rested at the back of my head, I felt it slightly tremble as it slides to leave a touch.

I look at him frowning at me with cheerless eyes.

And my heart beat is still as loud as hell but I clearly hear him say, he made me hear him say,

“Will you make me stop? I think I’m starting to like you…”

 

 

 

-O.0--
Ohorat~! hehehe how's everyone? thanks for spending sometime reading this fic...i really appreciate the comments too... how could i repay you guys?? aiyooo.. i really feel bad how i'm still lacking in many ways... i'll write better for the next chapters to come
 

btw.. here's a very short random taoris cut ^^

           
                    ...

                tao: whoaaaaa panda.... so cute~ *hugs while smiling widely*
                kris: what the hell...
                chen: *thinks* pfft... , this is fun
 

                   ....
 

       tao: awww... this really feels good *hugs more tightly*
       chen: *whispers to kris* hyung, please control yourself. it's just a mascot                      that tao is very fond with...
      kris: tsk. i know.
 

      .....