Chapter three: Trauma

"Be careful ok?" Mrs. Park nodded as she smiled, "I'll talk to you later Lu Han. Take care," she finished as she hung up.

The moment the mentioned female ended her phone call, she heard someone knocking on the door and the woman already knew who was standing outside, so there wasn't a reason to ask who it was. She just opened the door and welcomed the guest with a heartwarming smile.

"You came earlier, Hana"

The young female nodded. "I didn't have to tutor nobody after school and I already finished my homework," Hana said as she placed her bag in the chair, "Where's my brother?"

"Bathroom. I bet he already heard you"

Indeed, Hana's little brother, Junwoo, came running from the bathroom as he finished what he was doing.

Even if Hana didn’t have so many friends to hang out with, she was happy; she was contented with what she has. After all, her priorities are her younger brother and her studies. Nothing else but those two. And due to only focusing on those, her grades were pretty good. She wasn’t call names because of it, instead her classmates asked her to tutor them if she was available. If she was on the mood for it, she’d gladly do it, because she had learnt that even in the rough times she had to be strong. To not let her private life interfere with her studies, even if it was as painful as hers. Hana had to be valiant to face what comes across her road. If she was weak, if she wasn’t courageous, she won’t succeed, she won’t reach further.

And during all this years, she had grown stronger. She wasn’t the small little girl she was years ago. She wasn’t as timid and quite as when she was five years old. Hana had to maturate at a pretty young age. Not only because her fears, but also due to her father. Because of him, Hana had to adapt to the world faster. Because of him, Hana realized the world was full of pain and insecurities. For him fairy tales and happy endings where bull. For him the world was full of mistrust and greed. All these thoughts he had mentioned Hana before, but she didn’t let those corrupt her. There was still a pinch of hope inside her. She was still noble and kind. She had tried to be like that even with all the scars and insecurities she had.

“Noona!” Junwoo came running towards Hana and he hugged her tightly, “I’m glad you here!”

Hana smiled affectively as she patted her little brother’s head.

“Hana?” The mentioned female lifted Junwoo in her arms as she turned the way she was called. “I know it had already passed a week, but better late than never”

Mrs. Park handed Hana a small box. It was a present. Mrs. Park was handing her fifteen birthday present.

Hana placed down Junwoo as she took the box. She bent down next to her brother as she looked the box silently and full with curiosity. It was the first gift she received for her birthday. It was the only one present she had received so far. And she really appreciated it. It was from Mrs. Park, someone Hana and Junwoo grew attached to, someone they could trust and someone who cares for both.

“Junwoo helped me choose it”

Hana gazed Junwoo as she smiled. She opened the small box revealing a beautiful silver necklace with an ‘H’ pedant. Her smile grew wider. Hana loved her present. She truly loved it. It was the most beautiful gift she had ever received so far. Not only because the necklace was simple yet elegant, but also because it was from the persons has she really cared about. It was from the two persons who showed her not only but sincerity and consideration.

“Thank you so much. I love it,” Hana’s eyes glowed with an obvious shade of cheerfulness.

Junwoo took the necklace and he helped his older sister. Hana collect her hair in simple bun with her hands, Junwoo put the necklace around her neck as he clipped it. She let her hair down as he finished as took the cold silver pendant with her hands.

It’s indeed beautiful. Hana smiled as she kissed Junwoo on his cheek and hugged Mrs. Park.

The only ones who great her were Mrs. Park and Junwoo. Hana had hoped her father greetings, but that day he left early, as usual, but didn’t come back for two days in a row. And when he came back, Hana was welcomed with his usual cold and distant gaze. His gaze full with hatred and bitterness towards the world. The gaze she had always feared.

But Hana didn’t let that affect her. It was the most significant present Hana ever received.

Suddenly, someone was knocking with irritation and despair at the door. That person was indeed angry for some unknown reason.

“Open the damn door!” Hana’s eyes grew wider as she recognized the male voice. It was her father. Junwoo started sobbing as he hid behind his sister.

“I know you are there Hana! Open the ing door right now!”

Hana glanced at Mrs. Park due to nervousness. She didn’t know what to do. If they opened the door, Hell will lose. And if they don’t, her father will break the door. Either of the two solutions was dangerous.

Actually, Hana’s father once found out his daughter talking with the older female and he wasn’t pleased with it.  He didn’t allow their relationship for an unknown reason. He scorned and yelled at her. And Hana couldn’t help but to listen all this harsh words, all his cursing and all his anger. The girl was sure if he figures out that she had disobey him, her father will get furious. He will not be able to control his anger.

“Everything will be alright,” Hana heard Mrs. Park said as she watched her walked towards the door. In that moment, Hana hid her necklace behind her blouse. She didn’t want him to see it.

The moment Mrs. Park opened the door, Hana’s father entered and grab his daughter wrist strongly, almost painfully and took her out. Junwoo, who was grabbing firmly his sister’s skirt, followed them.

“I don’t want to see you near her again”

With that he dragged Hana and Junwoo towards their apartment next door. He pushed Hana making her fall on the ground.

“Noona!” Junwoo was already sobbing due to fear. He was scared to death.

Hana hushed him by whispering an audible “Shhh..” In that moment, he knew Hana will deal with their father. Not physically but with words. And he feared she will end up physically hurt.

“Why? Why you disobey me!”

“Because there wasn’t a reason to judge her. Mrs. Park is a nice person,” Hana remained sat on the floor as Junwoo hid behind her, “So far, she had cared for us. Something you haven’t done”

With that Hana’s father slap her hard. Hana touched her swollen cheek as she felt her little brother grabbing her jacket tighter. It was warm due to the hit. Junwoo was listening every single word, but he remained with his eyes closed as he was shivering.

“You shouldn’t be talking with that !” her father yelled.

“Don’t call her like that!” Hana’s gaze lifted as she was still touching her cheek. His father just insulted Mrs. Park and Hana got courageous enough to answer him back. “You have no rights to call her like that because you barely know her!”

“Shut up! I can address her any way I want to!”

No, you can’t!

“Next time I caught you talking with that I won’t be responsible for my actions”

But what he and Hana didn’t know was that there won’t be a next time….

-

Hana glanced her classroom clock. Just five minutes to finish school and head towards home. Today, as yesterday, the fifteen year old girl didn’t have schedule after school. It was Friday.

Hana turned her head towards the window and glimpsed the tree’s leafs falling. The turn color of the dropping leafs were just hypnotizing. The simple brown and orange colors were unique and delightful to see. It was autumn. Her favorite season. Were it wasn’t too cold neither too hot. Even if it wasn’t the season she wasn’t born, Hana loved it because of the beauty that shows. The falling leaf represents for her a new beginning. A change. A new nascence to start over.

As she heard the bell sound, Hana stood up and prepare her backpack to head towards home.

The way back was silent and boring. The same buildings around. The same shortcuts were she walked. Today, Hana didn’t run. Today, she wasn’t in a hurry. She took her time as she watched carefully her surroundings.

There were many different stores and many apartments around.

Why she hasn’t noticed them before?

Because she was so deep in her thoughts of arriving home fast, that she forgot it. Hana forgot to get used to the different buildings around her hometown.

Soon she arrived.

Hana knocked on her neighbor door and looked to her side, where her apartment was located.

Her eyes grew wider as she walked towards next door. There was a small pool of a red color coming from inside the apartment. She didn’t want to believe it was blood. Hana didn’t want to make sure that it was the color of someone’s blood. Yet, the curiosity won over her.

She took her keys from her pocket’s jacket and opened the door slowly.

She was afraid of what she’ll face. Hana was shivering. She was scared to death if her thoughts became true.

It could be anybody’s blood. It could be from a stranger, a thief, or worst, her father.

The moment the door opened, Hana gasped. One of the options was true. The last option became true.

Hana burst into tears as she hid her vision with her eyes. She didn’t want to see it again. She didn’t want to see that lying corpse cover with blood again. It was traumatizing.

“Hana!” Soon she felt someone hugging her. Someone was protecting her. And that someone also saw what the girl saw just a few moments ago: Hana’s father lying corpse.

Mrs. Park guessed he was murdered. He received a shoot in the forehead, no gun around him, but not only that, he also had several cuts in his face as well as in the arms, and his some of his clothes were ripped and covered with blood.

Mrs. Park heard Hana sobbing. It was the first time she heard Hana crying.

The older female hugged the youngest with care until the latter stopped crying.

“Junwoo? Where’s he?” Hana whispered.

“Next door. Don´t worry, I closed the door”

Hana nodded. It was a relief that Junwoo was still too short to reach the door’s knob. He wasn’t able to open it and run to their apartment. If he sees this, he’d be more than scared. He’d shocked. He’d be terrified.

At least, Hana was old enough, but still that sight petrified her.

Mrs. Park noticed a small folder white paper in their feet. She bent down and picked it up. The moment she opened it, she could understand what was written down there because it was written in Japanese.

Hana noticed the weird gesture on Mrs. Park face as she lifted softly her head, avoiding the contact with the corpse meters away. The first saw the paper she was holding.

“Maybe you can understand it,” Mrs. Park gave Hana the small paper as the latter read it.

All deserves a happy ending, don’t you think?

Those words traumatized Hana… because of its bitterness and its sarcasm. The starriness was obvious.

His father didn’t die peacefully. He was murdered! He was assassinated in a cruel way! He didn’t receive a happy ending after all.

All the bitter words he ever told Hana where coming into her mind once again.

Fairy tales are a bunch of bull. Happy endings don’t exist. People live by greed and envy. The reality is cruel. People are cruel. And else….

But Hana was sure that whoever did this had a reason to do so.

Posted: 2014/01/07