The days passed as fast as the wind hit the trees, making relaxing sounds as the people that rested under them enjoyed the simplicity of life. Winter was finally in town, and the white snow covered the place as a thin layer of bright diamonds. Chaerin opened her eyes slowly, a warm feeling embracing her like fire embraced wood, slowly consuming it. She looked to the side, a smile plastered on her face as she saw the blonde-dye hair of Jiyong moving under the sheets. She slowly grabbed the sheet, her red nails looked scarlet in contrast to the white sheets, and pulled them down until it reached Jiyong’s waist. He was sleeping upside down, and the tattoo on the back of his right shoulder blade had the words ‘TOO FAST TO LIVE TOO YOUNG TO DIE’ slightly crooked as his right arm was under the pillow.

She caressed his back, leaving a trail of goosebumbs as she did. She felt him stirring slightly under her touch, and he moved his head to the side, facing her, and smiled. “Morning beauty,” He mumbled with his usual husky morning voice. She smiled widely and rested her chin on his shoulder, planting a kiss on his cheek.

“Morning handsome,” She murmured and he smirked.

“Oh I know that.” He murmured again, turning his head and burying it on the pillow. She smiled and stood up, impulsing herself on him, and he groaned. He wasn’t a morning person, he had already showed her that much, and not that she was such a merry-go-around person in the mornings, but that day, she just felt happy.

Chaerin walked towards the curtains covering a full panel window, these were black, since they were in Jiyong’s villa outside of town. She opened the black curtains slowly, letting the ray of light illuminate the room. The walls were painted in gray, the room itself was kind of dark and gothic, the furniture were made of ebony and gold, designed in an antique style, and she thought, with not the most amusing surprise, that they must had cost a fortune. The bed was big, and as the rest of the room, it looked like it was designed by Jiyong himself, since the whole room screamed G-DRAGON in all caps. The bed sheets were completely white, the only bright color on that dark room. Unlike the other one she had slept in in the past, this one looked more normal, the vanity was filled with little golden and wooden boxes, and there were a few brushes on top of it. Close to the mirror there were a few bottles, some with body lotion, some others with perfume. The nightstand had a few portraits on top of it, and she could recognize one as a Big Bang mini poster.

As she opened the windows completely, Jiyong groaned louder and put the pillow on top of his head, now the sheets were lower, showing his black pajama pants. She giggled and walked towards the bed and grabbed a night coat that hanged on one of the pillars and put it on, covering her much too y transparent nightgown. She decided she would give him a few extra minutes to wake up for himself, after all, it was just 9am and they didn’t have anything to do that day. She closed the curtains again and walked silently out of the room.

She walked towards the living room, the place was decorated as a cottage, and it was just perfect due to the cold weather outside. As she walked towards the kitchen, she heard her phone ringing somewhere on the living room and frowned. Both James and Dara were asleep, and the Big Bang members weren’t likely to call her phone, much less at this time knowing well how cranky Jiyong gets every time his sleep is disturbed. She searched for her phone, it was lying on top of the coffee table, and looked at the screen, it was an unknown number. She hastily slid the screen and answered the phone with a raised eyebrow.

“Hello?” She answered quietly, trying not to wake the others.

“Lee Chaerin, it’s a pleasure to finally hear from you.” A man said on the other line, and Chaerin widened her eyes at the familiar voice, thought she couldn’t quite point a finger at who he was.

“Who’s this?” She asked, her voice cautious as she slowly walked towards the crystal doors that led towards the balcony, now filled with snow.

“I don’t think this is a time to be playing dumb Chaerin, you well know who I am.” He said with a terrifying familiarity that made Chaerin tremble.

“K-Kim Woo Choong…” She murmured as the name popped in her mind, as the name cut through her veins and made its way out of .

“Yes Chaerin, I’m glad you remember me because I have some business to talk with you.” He told her, and her whole body shivered.

“I don’t have any business with you.” She spoke menacingly and Woochoong laughed without any humor.

“I never said you had them, I said I had them, and you may listen, if you don’t want your beloved idol to have a most unfortunate accident.” He said and Chaerin’s eyes widened.

“You wouldn’t…”

“Yes, you know I would. You well know I would do anything to have what I want, and this is no less the case.”

“And what’s that?” She asked, now her voice was far from menacing, it was filled with fear, a fear she haven’t felt in a long time.

“I would like to say I want you gone, but that’s not an option now. So I guess I want you back, back in our company.” He told her, and she closed her eyes, a tear slowly rolling down from her eyes.

“I can’t… it’s law, I can’t go back.”

“If you think the death of the Yang brothers affects me, you’re so wrong. You well know they were only pawns on this game, you know better than that.”

“I know…” She murmured. “But that doesn’t means I would like to go back.”

“Even for your father?” he told her, and she widened her eyes.

“What about him?” She asked.

“Well, he has been of a lot of use to us for quite a long time, I can always… terminate his contract…” He told her, and she knew too well the meaning of those words, and the mere thought of it made her stomach turn.

“What do I have to do?”

“Leave Korea, come back to the states, but bring no one. Leave that idol of yours alone and come back.” He said, and she didn’t mind to hide the sight that escaped her lungs.

“I can’t do that, what would assure me that he wouldn’t be harmed?”

“I’m a man of word, if you leave him, I’ll make sure he has his beloved freedom and that no one would ever harm him. I promise you that much.” He said, and the offer was extremely good to be ignored.

“And what about James and Dara?” She asked.

“You’re new friends? All the people you ever met in Korea will be unharmed, if you come back to us.” He said, and Chaerin couldn’t give it second thoughts, it was too good to be truth, sacrifice herself for the better good, for their freedom, she could give that much. For them, for Jiyong, she could throw away her own freedom, if they could have theirs, she was happy to give.

“When do I depart?” She said, even with a lump on , she said it.

“Tomorrow morning, today, make sure you cut connections with them.” He said and hung up. She slowly put the phone down, tears strolling down her eyes as she looked at the locked screen on her phone, the reflection of her flushed face. As she was looking down, the lazy footsteps of Jiyong approached her, and as she looked up, he was looking at her with worried, swollen eyes.  He walked towards her and kneeled in front of her, slowly caressing her face.

“What’s wrong babe?” He asked with such a tender voice it broke her heart. There was only one way to break connections with him, and that required breaking him completely, and she would be the one hurting more, but it was for the greater good. She was willing to give him that pain and have him alive than loving him and have him killed. She shook her head hastily and stood up, pushing him slightly away as she did.

“Nothing, just leave me alone.” She said as she searched for her keys. Slowly, he was walked towards her; his brown eyes came into light, their deepness and sorrow broke her completely, and she tried to grab the slight bit of hope left, hoping he would hate her after she said the words she hated the most.

“Just tell me what’s wrong, babe.” Jiyong said extending his hand towards Chaerin. She inhaled deeply as she took in everything that surrounded them. Everything was so perfect, and at the same time, so gloomy, so sad, so grey, and so dark.

“Why?” Chaerin asked skeptically as she looked at him again, “Why should I? Who are you in my life that I should tell you everything that happens to me?” His face turned dark at her question, allowing her to take in the sadness on his eyes. Those eyes, those beautiful pearls that made Chaerin fall in love with this amazing man, and now, now it was time to let go. Jiyong looked to the side, his bangs slowly falling on his face, letting his golden hair hide his perfect face. Chaerin closed her eyes, trying to keep inside of her every attempt of running away, of screaming in pain, every need to cry endlessly in front of the only man that could make her world stop and start turning again.

“Why are you doing this?” He murmured as he looked down, tears slowly falling from his eyes. How much did she wish to grab his face in both her hands and clean those tears falling, slowly staining his perfect image? She could only sigh in defeat as his body never moved, and neither hers.

“Because this is stupid,” Chaerin whispered, now the lump on was slowly making its way out, almost choking her as a quiet sob escaped from . Jiyong raised his head, looking at her through the bangs that were now hiding his divine countenance. She lowered her head, trying to lessen the pain on his chest, an evident pain she herself was feeling.

“You were just fine a few moments ago, why are you doing this Chaerin? Why?” He said, almost pleading as his feet took small but steady steps towards her. Chaerin bit her lower lip, now tears were streaming down her face, and that piercing pain on her chest grew stronger, so strong she had to put her hand on her chest to avoid her broken heart to fall off the open injury that formed in there. 

“I wish I never met you…” She said with a trembling voice, regretting every word spitted. Jiyong stopped, inhaled deeply and let himself fall on the floor, sobbing. She had never seen that strong man break in pieces in front of her, and what’s worst, she was breaking him apart.

“H-How can you regret it?” He sobbed looking at her. His face broke her completely, his sorrowful expression, the tears falling fresh from his eyes, the red cheeks and nose, the clear eyes drowned in tears, everything broke her. “I thought… you’re my life Chaerin, and I thought you loved me as I love you. What’s wrong with you?” He pleaded, oh God did he pleaded, his broken voice almost a whisper as he begged for another hope, for another opportunity.

“No, Jiyong… it’s over… we’re over, and I don’t love you anymore!” She finally said, turning around and leaving the only reason for her to stay alive behind, leaving everything she cared, leaving the man that was her everything, and for what? Only to feel broken later on, only to feel dead and incomplete, as she always had.

“It’s suicide; I’m killing myself with this…” Chaerin murmured as she walked away from that painful image of him looking at her disappear in a place she thought would be a place for them to love each other plainly, a place she was starting to feel as home, with him at her side, always smiling and showing her bits of love. She ran out of the villa and into the woods, those woods that seemed to be infinite, but with Jiyong by her side, it was always a nice walk, even if it took hours, he knew the place by heart, and she, she was never good memorizing places, so now she was lost without him.

Almost out of breath, Chaerin finally found her way out of the woods and into the place her car was parked, outside of the small villa that was Jiyong’s own happy place, a place that now became her living nightmare, her daymare. Jiyong, if only I could tell you, if only this wasn’t so hard, if only I could love you without any consequences, our lives would be perfect, but nothing’s perfect in this cruel world, this reality that hits us every second of the day, every moment it can, but if it’s for you, I’m willing to break my heart a hundred times, if it’s for you, I can give as much, she thought, slowly sinking in her own pit of despair, sorrow and regrets. Her phone rang nonstop as she walked towards her car, the caller was unknown, yet she knew by heart who he was. With a bitter voice, she answered the phone, letting the person know all her anger, all her hatred.

“I believe everything’s done by now, right?” He said as if it was the most amusing thing in the world.

“It’s done, and I truly hope you have a good reason or you won’t feel much amused after I find you.” Chaerin said through her teeth, spilling all her anger towards the monster that just called.

“Don’t worry CL, it was for the best, now he’s safe and you can go back to your normal life like nothing happened” He said. Chaerin her lips and opened the door of her car.

“You better keep your promises Woochoong, or I’ll make sure your body can’t be recognized after I’m done with you.” She said and ended the call as she started the engine and drove out of the place. She closed her eyes and drove, not losing control of her car, as she wished she would. Her phone rang thousands of times, and she cried louder every time she ignored Jiyong’s calls, and she cursed louder every time she got farther away.

It’s for the better…