Freedom, a word that weights as much as Love does, words that, even if you don’t mean them, are hard to say, to speak, to get the true meaning of it. They say to love is to be free, but for a few, to love is to slowly die wanting more of what you have. In Chaerin’s life, love was never an option, yes, she had loved, so much it almost broke her, but was that true love? Could she ever feel again like she felt, or was that new feeling growing inside of her the clue to destroy the whole world and build it again, now with a new meaning?

As she saw the thin figure of Jiyong approaching her, she felt her heart beating faster. She knew, by the way he looked, and by the way her body felt, that loving him was to never be free. She couldn’t force herself to be away from him, but also, deep within her, she knew that by being with him meant to never have the opportunity to be finally free, that being with him meant that she always would live the life as she had known it. It wasn’t such a bad thing, considering the fact that she didn’t know anything else, just fight, follow orders, kill, fight, live, that’s all she ever knew for the past 23 years of her life.

The moment she was born, her mother knew she wasn’t going to keep her baby, and only after two years, her mother passed away, an unknown disease they would tell her, but deep inside, as years passed Chaerin knew it wasn’t like that. Chaerin’s parents were from the Elder Elite, soldiers trained to kill, skilled mercenaries that everyone wanted, some dead, some as allies, but everyone wanted them. The day her parents met, it was the day both their companies wanted them dead, why? They were supposed to be enemies, to kill each other at sight, but now she understood, now she knew, to love is to suffer, to be with the one you love is to be bound to exile, to be forever running away from the greater power, and that wasn’t freedom, that was something else.

Jiyong was absolutely perfect, and the longer she looked at him, the hardest it was to let go. He was everything one could have, and yet he was everything she didn’t want to have. But she was madly in love, in such little time, she was lost in a fantasy where she could have anything she wanted and pay no prize for it. He stood next to her, slightly touching her shoulder as he did, and his slight touch send shivers throughout her body, and that mere reaction scared her, like anything in the world, she felt scared of the desire that filled her every time he was close, every moment he touched her, every second he looked at her. She looked up, smiling at him, and he looked back, his deep brown eyes boring into hers, captivating her. She felt completely , completely disarmed in front of him, yet it was the mere thought of having him close that filled her with a feeling of protection, of security, of loyalty and trust.

“What’s the plan?” He asked, his voice low, husky, and she knew – like expecting the next sentence in a book – that he was sad, worried, and even confused. She was totally amazed by the way she has got to know him, even in the short time they had shared, she knew him like her own self, and it scared her.

“Hyunseung’s not here, we must go to CNS and search there.” Dara said and Chaerin chuckled a bit.

“That’s like going to the Tiger’s cage Dara.” She said and Dara shrugged.

“CNS?” Seungri, who was now at James’s side, asked. Jiyong looked at him with raised eyebrows and then shook his head chuckling.

“Cube Night Shadows, Chaerin’s company.” James said and Seungri nodded with a grim expression.

“Figures.” He murmured and Jiyong punched his shoulder.

“Easy now.” He said and Seungri just glared at him, Jiyong, however, smiled. “Don’t mess with me boy.” Jiyong said and Seungri crossed his arms, still glaring, but now at nothing specifically.

Chaerin had not missed Seungri’s actions, and she knew exactly why he was acting like that, and the way he looked at Jiyong, at her, told her everything. He hasn’t gotten over her and knew that something was up between her and Jiyong, something serious.

No, actually is the opposite I want. I want you to destroy him, not just as we had planned; I really want you to destroy him.

Chaerin remembered Hyunseung’s words and felt like realization had hit her hard. Hyunseung had planned everything since the beginning, and just this moment, those eyes looking at her told her everything she needed to know.

Oh, but you had begun already.

She felt like killing herself at that moment, now that she had finally realized the obvious. “He didn’t mean Seungri.” The words came out like whispers, and as she realized had betrayed her, she widened her eyes in shock. Jiyong, who was exactly next to her, looked at her with confused eyes.

“What do you mean?” He asked her, and she felt like everything, all the cards, the weapons the people had turned against her. She looked at Dara, hoping she would give her support, but Dara was too busy explaining James what they should do and Chaerin knew it was a worthless plan, he must be out of town already, and it was all thanks to her.

“It’s not going to work.” Chaerin said, her voice almost cracking as everything sank in her. She felt her heart constricting and a hard lump was forming on . She looked at Jiyong; all bruised, all thanks to her, only her. “I’m so sorry.” She told him, and he shook his head in disbelieve.

“Sorry about what? You haven’t done anything.” Jiyong said, his voice a bit loud due to his shock. She shook her head and lowered it, tears falling from her face. She looked at James, who was now looking at her with surprised eyes, while Dara just crossed her arms, she never looked surprised or shocked, she was always serene, composed, and Chaerin envied her for that, she used to be like that, but since this mission started, she had been unstable, and now, she was desperate for help, but she knew that, after they find out, there would be no one to hold on to.

“But I did Jiyong, and I’m sorry.” She said, her face flushed, her eyes so teary everything became a blur. Jiyong shook his head and grabbed her face in both his arms, and Seungri widened his eyes at his movement, then a slight hint of hatred flashed in them, like a picture in a dark room, appearing slowly in front of the photographers eyes.

“No, you haven’t done anything. Why are you blaming yourself now? About what? Don’t be stupid Chae.” Jiyong said. She shook her head and he grabbed her firmly, holding her face in place and then kissed her. It was a quick kiss, but to her it meant the world. When he pulled apart, she couldn’t help but look at Seungri, who was staring at them, his eyes dark with hatred, and now she wasn’t sure if it was towards her or towards him.

“Jiyong, please don’t… no…” She said, pulling apart from him. She saw him looking at James, who was as surprised as he was, then looked at her. She cried harder, and slowly, she let herself fall on her knees. Jiyong kneeled quickly, grabbing her face. She let him, crying on his hands as she so desperately tried to avoid thinking of what she was supposed to do.

“What’s wrong with-“

“You were my mission Jiyong, it was always you…” She said, and as she spoke, Jiyong’s eyes widened, then he shook his head in disbelieve.

“Oh please woman, how can you say that?!” He said, still grabbing her face.

“He told me… he asked me to destroy you, and me, so stupidly followed his order thinking I was doing the exact opposite. Jiyong it was my job to destroy you from the very beginning, it wasn’t Seungri, it wasn’t Hyunsuk, it was you.” She said, her voice cracking as she cried, telling him the sour truth. Jiyong shook his head, and for Chaerin’s regret, he let go of her, now sitting on the floor, his face was the epitome of darkness, of pain and betrayal.

“It’s not possible… you wouldn’t…” He said while shaking his head no in denial. “Why Seungri? What does he have to do with this?” He said, looking up to Seungri, then back at her.

“She was my girlfriend…” Seungri whispered and Chaerin lowered her face and put a hand on as she cried.

“What?!” Jiyong said, his voice rising in pure anger. “Your girlfriend? Why didn’t you told me Chaerin? So… is she that girl… oh my ing God!” Jiyong said, a hand on his mouth as he realized the truth.

“I’m so sorry Jiyong, I never meant to hurt you…” Chaerin said, but Jiyong ignored her.

“And you, you’re the reason why they didn’t set me free. You’re the one who was supposed to kill me. Along with…” He said and stood up, looking at James, who was now next to Chaerin. “Why?” Jiyong said, now finally looking at Chaerin. She looked up to him, his face was flushed, and for the first time, she wasn’t sure if it was because of sadness or hatred.

“No Jiyong, my business was to eliminate Chaerin if she didn’t succeeded on her mission, but I always thought it was Hyunsuk, not you…” James said. Chaerin took a deep breath and slowly stood up. Her unsteady legs shaking as she did, balancing herself on the wall. She looked at Jiyong, and as she was looking at him, she took out her dagger. He widened his eyes and took a step back, but she just dropped her dagger in front of him. Then she grabbed her gun and also dropped it in front of him, and so she did with the rest of her weapons.

“I won’t be the one killing you, and I won’t be the one destroying you.” She said and Jiyong just looked at her with the same expression one would give a stray cat or dog. She closed her eyes, her lips then opened them again, more tears coming out. “Please don’t look at me like that.” She begged and he shook his head.

“How do you expect me to look at you now?” He asked her, and she just shook her head, loud sobs escaping from . “Now I realize, you never truly loved me, you never told me the truth right?” He said and she shook her head violently.

“No, don’t say that. Everything I had told you it was true, all my feelings, everything.” She said and he laughed cynically while shaking his head no.

“All your feelings? But you have never told me anything.” He said.

“I love you.” She spoke and he scoffed.

“Really? Do you even know what that word means?” He said, and his tone was so harsh she finally felt what hate felt like. And she didn’t blame him, didn’t blame anyone but herself, not even Seungri and at how he looked at her. She thought he had every right to hate her, since she, after all, had destroyed two people at once.

“I know what I feel, deep within here,” with a trembling hand, she pointed her chest. “And I know that, by that feeling, I could never destroy you, no matter if it cost me my life, I would gladly give it for you,” She said. After all, he had given her life a meaning, a hope, a reason, and as much as she wanted to go away and leave him in peace, she couldn’t bear the sole thought of being away.

“Is that true or is that one of your many lies to achieve your goal?” Seungri said and Chaerin looked at him with a blank expression.

“Why would I lie to him?” She said and Seungri scoffed.

“You lied to me, it comes easy for you, isn’t it?” He said, but before Chaerin could say something else, Dara in, clapping her hands.

“Listen boys, I know you hate her, I would too, but come to think of it, the girl didn’t even know you were her target, so what of it?” Dara said, talking to Jiyong. He smirked and shook his head.

“Does she really?” He said and Chaerin nodded, but James glared at him.

“We’re from different companies, what makes us trust you? Nothing right? But we saved your , and we’re on your side, doesn’t that gives you enough proof of her words?” he said and Jiyong shook his head once more and turned around, leaving them there. Chaerin extended her hand to stop him, but James stopped her. She looked at him but he just only shook his head no. “Don’t go, he’ll need the space.” He said and Chaerin nodded. Still crying, she looked towards where Jiyong had disappeared, and for the first time in her whole life, she regretted ever being part of her world, for the first time in her life, she wished she could be somebody else.

Gily's Notes: So you thought I couldn't bring any more drama right? Well, you're wrong!! BUAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

I'm extending it a bit, but honestly, there's something that still has to happen, and well, I'm still weighting possibilities xD lol!!

Oh God, I'm enjoying this too much, too much! I'm in love with this story!! 

I love you all my dear readers, my friends! 

Happy Reading~

Gily ♥