It's all a blur...one moment he's on the ground bleeding.....he's on a stretcher and being transported into a vehicle. I can't even remember what the color of it was. The next moment, he is being taken into the hospital. At some point, I snap out of my daydream-like daze. I feel something warm cover my hands and I look down. It's a hand and when my eyes travel from the hand, up the arm, the neck, I find a familiar face. The face is NamJoon's. Tears start to flow down my cheeks and he brought me close so I could lean against him for support and hide my tear-stained face against his chest.

Time just did not exist. Whenever I looked up, the doors he went through still hadn't opened. He just didn't seem to exist. I closed my eyes. I'll just rest for a little while...

Somehow, I managed to fall asleep. After some time passed though, but for how long I have no idea, I felt someone shaking me awake. "What...? What is it?"

"Someone's here to talk to you..." NamJoon's voice was soft. Tiredly, I made myself look up at the person who wanted to speak with me. My eyes widened, for it was the ahjumma from the jewelry store.

"Ahjumma? What are you doing here??" I was so surprised to see her here in the hospital....and at the same time Kidoh was currently fighting for his life.

She gave me a gentle smile and said, "Is it so odd that a mother comes to give support to her son?"

What? She's not my... I remembered the picture in her home of the little boy who looked so much like me. I've only known one person who looks so similar to me. No way...she is HyoSang's...mother?

Her voice interrupted my thoughts, "I know it sounds crazy, but I had a feeling when I met him he was the person I'd almost given up hope in finding. My son. When I remembered what you said about him when we met, I felt even more sure he was my son."

"Ahjumma..." I couldn't speak. My throat closed up and fresh tears spilled. She sat next to me and held me in her arms. She comforted me. Shouldn't I be comforting her? There was something wrong with the world. Too many times the world decides to take away the best people. At this moment, this ahjumma who is already like a mother to me, might lose her son before being able to tell her real son who she is to him. The world, reality, whatever you want to call it, is all too cruel.

"Hush...shh...don't cry like this." She gently my hair as I sobbed on her shoulder.

"Ahjumma..." For some reason, that title for her was the only word my lips could form.

"No, don't cry. Do you know why? Because when he sees your face, he shouldn't see your tears. He should see a smile on your face," she told me in such a gentle tone.

And that's when I noticed. She was trembling just a little bit. Her eyes showed fear for the loss of the life she had brought into the world. The hand that was my hair was shaky. The other hand which was rubbing my back was just as shaky, if not more. I put my arms around her and hugged her tightly. "Ahjumma, I'm...I'm sure he'll make it..."

Suddenly, the doors burst open and the bed carrying HyoSang came from the room. I stood up, HyoSang's mother following suit, and for some reason my feet would not move, they could not, would not budge from their place on the floor. A hand gently touched my arm and I looked at the person who touched me. She gave me a gentle smile. "SeokJin, let's go see him." I slowly nodded and eventually my feet moved in the direction HyoSang had been taken.

A few paces later, we arrived at the door of his room. I stopped. What if he's...no. He's stronger than that.  He wouldn't be able to leave...right?

There were so many tubes...going this way and that. Why are there so many? My feet would not let me go any further. Who would do this to him? A hand rested on my shoulder in an attempt to comfort me. How could someone do this to him? I looked at the owner of the hand and gave him, NamJoon, a bitter smile. What happened to make him like this? HyoSang was lying there on the bed, completely still. When did it start? The heart monitor beeped steadily. HyoSang.....why would anyone try to hurt, no, kill you? I know you don't deserve this.

"SeokJin, you should sit down," NamJoon softly said as he placed a hand on my shoulder and his other on my waist then slowly guided me to one of the chairs beside HyoSang's bed. Then soft footsteps told me he was leaving the room and as they faded, I grasped Hyosang's hand and held it between mine. For whatever reason, his hand was cold. It was always warm...

"Hyosang, don't leave..." I pressed his hand against my cheek, as if I could somehow bring heat back into his body. I whispered against his barely warm hand, "I miss you.. and love you....."

Suddenly the constant beeping of the heart monitor stopped.

I looked up and on the monitor was a flat line. My eyes widened in shock. Some people rushed into the room and I was forced out. "No! Let me stay with hi-!!"

I'm immediately forced to be quiet and made to sit down as a separate nurse keeps watch over me. HyoSang's mother was standing watch at the doorway, NamJoon is sitting right next to me and I watch as the members of BTS enter the hospital. They all rush over and pester me with questions I don't understand. NamJoon shakes his head and they all become quiet. In that exact moment, I hear a wail of pure grief. I look towards HyoSang's room and his mother is on her knees, sobbing.

"He can't be gone... No! You have to...you have to save him!!" His mother was begging the doctors and nurses. I suddenly grow numb. I stood up, slightly wobbly on my feet and looked into his room through a window.

They were covering his face with a white cloth.

HyoSang, my first love, was dead.