Friday, December 17th
   5:55 p.m.
   Gongchan's apartment

   It's almost time. Gongchan thought, checking the time on his phone before slipping it back into his soft pink pants. I should probably knock on his door and see if he's ready to go. Throwing on a fluffy black coat with the furry hood pulled over his head and bare chest, Gongchan stepped outside, shivered a little at how cold it's getting, and walked the 3 steps to Jinyoung's door. Gongchan raised his hand to knock on the eggshell-colored door, only to have it open before he can lay his knuckles on the wood. 

   "Oh, hey Pu--" Jinyoung started, but abruptly stopped, staring at Gongchan's exposed chest and then coughing a little bit to try to hint at the younger, colder male in front of him if he might want to come in, away from the cold. Not realizing that Jinyoung is trying to drop a hint, Gongchan frowned. 

   "Are you catching something?" Gongchan asks, worry threading through his voice like a drop of sweet honey through coffee. "Look, we can cancel dinner, if you aren't feeling well." 

   Jinyoung just shook his head no. He was already ready to go out to dinner, and Gongchan hadn't noticed that. Quickly checking Jinyoung out, Gongchan caught himself and started to blush. Jin was dressed in black pants with a black belt, a soft forest green button-up dress shirt, black tie, and a dark jacket hooked on his finger, draped over his back. In one word, Jinyoung was stunning. 

   "Come on pup, let's get you inside and ready." Jinyoung ordered gently, walking inside to grab his wallet, socks, and shoes. "I'll be over at your place in a second! Just finish getting ready, it's almost 6:10!" Although Jin did say that he was going to pick Gongchan up at 6, they both figured they could skip on the time a little because there would be no need since the restaurant was about 10 minutes down the street. 

   Walking back into his apartment, Gongchan strolled back to the closet, stripping himself of his coat and exposing his bare torso again. He couldn't help but shiver since he left the door open, but he figured that Jin would be coming in and shutting the door any second. Stepping up to his clothes, he pushed a few shirts aside until he found his favorite white button-up and his matching pink scarf. He didn't know why, but pink looked so great on Gongchan, along with white. 

   Gongchan didn't realize anyone was in his apartment, let alone his room, until he felt icy fingers lightly rest on his soft, warm sides. Squealing and jumping, he heard Jinyoung's voice in his ear, his warm breath trailing its way down his neck and making him shiver from the two conflicting temperatures from his hyung.

   "Hey, relax pup. It's only me." Jinyoung whispered gently, nuzzling the nape of Gongchan's neck a little before executing his master plan. Quickly taking his hands off Gongchan's sides, he presses them against the spot on the latter's back where it would affect his pup the most. Yelling, he announced his intentions.

   "Feel the burn! Tsssssssssss!"

   Gongchan yelped, astounded at how ice-like Jinyoung's hands could be and at how cruel he can be with those things. 

   "Jeez, what's wrong with you?! Your hands are so cold!" Gongchan scolded, reprimanding the older male who was just cackling away on his floor, clutching at his own sides.

   "Yeah, haha. Very funny..." 

  Reaching into the closet while Jinyoung got himself off the floor, Gongchan pulled out a plain white undershirt and quickly got into it, aware that he'd have a better chance of fending off another attack if he was clothed properly. Finally buttoning up the last button on his shirt and getting the excess on his belt stashed away in the belt loops, Gongchan started to wrap his scarf around himself when Jinyoung gently grabbed his arm. 

   "Let me." Was all Jinyoung had to say to make a blush blossom across Gongchan's face. With a warm smile on his face, he gently laced the soft material around Gongchan's neck, taking a step back when finished to admire the younger boy.

   "You do look really wonderful. I hope you know that." Jinyoung said warmly, taking ahold of Gongchan's hand and leading him outside.

   "Come on, we're going to be late for our reservation."

•   •   •

   Jinyoung and Gongchan had gotten there about 3 minutes late, but they both knew that that wouldn't make a difference. The reservation was under Baro's name, so both boys knew that the restaurant wouldn't just give away the reservation due to the fact that Baro would be considered a high-profile customer. 

   Gongchan quite liked the appearance of at least the outside of the restaurant. A smaller building, the outside walls were a sapphire color with large windows to see in and out of the building. They even had a stark white awning set up to hang over the door. Gongchan's impression of the restaurant improved as he was escorted inside by his hyung. The walls were painted a soft autumn brown, with lamps hanging down from the ceiling for each individual booth, and lamps with a cord running down through the middle for tables. The light that rolled from each of the lamps was enough to illuminate each table, with a view from afar that reminded Gongchan of paper lanterns set adrift on a sea of black water at night. 

   With the host showing them to one of the more private booths, one of the round corner booths that are right next to one of the large windows that act as a looking glass into the outside world, Jinyoung sits down and pats the spot next to him, inviting the younger male to take the seat on the booth next to him. Hesitating, yet failing to find a reason why he shouldn't sit next to his hyung, Gongchan finally claimed the spot next to the older male already seated. 

   Upon opening the menu and quickly perusing, Jinyoung quickly found what he ordered last night and closed his menu. Gongchan, on the other hand, had a tougher time choosing until he looked at what kimchi was served here.

   "Oh wow! They serve cucumber kimchi here?!" Gongchan said, almost slamming shut his menu and throwing it on top of Jinyoung's already waiting menu. Jinyoung laughed at Gongchan's astonishment, nodding his head at the boy next to him. He was really cute with a surprised expression on his face, as long as it wasn't something that would mar that beautiful face soon afterwards. 

   "Yeah, they do. From your reaction to them having it, I'm guessing you like it. I've tried it, and it was okay, but..." Jinyoung explained, letting his voice trail off as both of them knew what the next words were going to be anyway. Soon after both of their menus were shut, a waitress came over and took both their orders for drinks, which were both just green tea, and their meal orders. 

   After the waitress walked away with their orders, the 'couple' resumed their conversations about food. 

   "I can't believe you ordered that much food... We have the championship game soon, you know." Gongchan chided Jinyoung, gently patting the latter's stomach.

   "I know mom, thanks for reminding me. It's only some bacon Spam, Sweet and Sour Pork, and naengmyeon. You're the one who ordered the kimchi and the rice cakes. I don't even know why you like tteok. I'm not really a super dessert person, I guess..." Jinyoung said, attempting to defend himself but ended up failing by chuckling at Gongchan rolling his eyes.

   "Yeah, but those are three dishes. After I eat my cucumber kimchi, odds are that I won't want to eat any more. Do you really think you can eat all that food?" 

   "I don't see why not. Although... I'm sure you'll eat some if I feed it to you." Jinyoung retorted, grinning wickedly at his comment when he was rewarded with a blush and a slight wiggle away caused laughter to burst forth, with his hands being the only thing to stifle his raucous laughter from echoing across the relatively quiet restaurant. 

   Once the food was brought, the conversation between the two boys blossomed. Both of them shared a passion for food, although Gongchan being able to eat considerably more than he thought he would. Jin was right, Gongchan couldn't resist not taking another bite if Jin was the one to feed him. In between bites, Jinyoung asked an unexpected question which did throw Gongchan off, though. 

   "So... The day I first ever saw you, Suzy had slapped some guy and screamed at him. She even went as far as to pay the manager to ban him from the shop. If it isn't too much to ask, would you mind telling me what that was about?" Jinyoung inquired. He didn't want to pry where Gongchan didn't want him to, but he just couldn't help it. He never again wanted to see that expression that was on his little pup's face that day, the look of utter desperation and despair. 

   "Er..." Gongchan started, the dam in his mind holding back the toxic flood waters of Sandeul's past treatment of him instantly came crumbling down at the mention of the day of their breakup. Gongchan just let his eyes wander, eventually landing a little bit of pork in front of him. It didn't matter; for he was lost, drowning in the memories of the past, suffocating again under the sudden crushing weight of the burden he carried then. Jinyoung, leaning down a little bit and seeing the faraway expression and the look of him not being completely aware of his surroundings clouding up the otherwise clear starry night that was his pup's eyes, he put his hand on Gongchan's shoulder reassuringly. Softly whispering in the younger male's ear, he attempted to be as reassuring he could. 

   "If this is something you don't want to talk about, I'll drop it." Jinyoung whispered. Snapping somewhat back to reality, Gongchan gave a haphazard shake of his head, before returning to his blank stare, but not without recounting the details while still in this almost trace-like state.

   "He was my boyfriend. My first boyfriend, actually..." Gongchan began, his voice sounded distant, as if he were far away in some other place altogether.

   "We had been dating for about 4 months, and it would of been our 4 month anniversary on the 24^th of November. We had shared enough in common that I had started to fall for him... We had met at school, although he wasn't a student and still isn't. Not at SNU, at least. He had been visiting one of his friends, and I met him and one thing led to another, and we exchanged phone numbers..."

   Gongchan drifted off, the memories battering violently against the great fortress he had built for himself after the break-up. He knew what he was doing, that it was very unhealthy for him to be both walling himself off and for him to overreact so greatly, but the construction of the sanctuary couldn't halt until it was finished. Gently pressing for more, Jinyoung squeezed his hand that still rested on Gongchan's shoulder, attempting to rescue the boy when he could tell he was struggling with something heavy. Mustering his most soothing of voices, Jinyoung urged Gongchan forth.

   "If you can, please go on. If it's too painful, then it's alright pup. You've already shared enough. You can stop if you want, it's going to be okay." 

   Gongchan didn't hear the words, he just let the warm voice of the boy he was having dinner with, sharing himself with, wash over him. At the battlefront, with the sheer force of the memories essentially breaking down his defenses, Jinyoung's voice rang forth with amazing clarity, helping to fend off the savage, merciless onslaught of the bitter memories that plagued Gongchan.

   "After we had each other's numbers..." Gongchan started back up again, his voice sounding less distant, but still sounded as if he was further than right next to the person who was physically touching him.

   "After then, we had started to text each other, spend time together, just us or with a group of mutual friends. We grew closer, bonding over things that we had both liked until he said something rather distressing to me. He had told me that he had thought of suicide recently. It hit me hard." Gongchan sounded as is he was drifting further away again, and that was when Jinyoung let go of his pup's shoulder and instead grabbed his hand, squeezing it in a warm and comforting manner. That simple action was enough to draw Gongchan's gaze to Jinyoung's face and elicit a weak smile before the tempest of memories Gongchan back into the maelstrom. 

  "What happened next? How did you react?" Jinyoung pressed on, knowing that all these things that he's being told right now, not even Suzy has heard. He knew that what he was being told, what was trickling directly from Gongchan's soul, was his innermost emotions in their purest of forms. He knew that a release was very important for Gongchan if he ever wanted to start to heal from the marring caused by Sandeul. Gongchan sighed, obviously acknowledging what Jinyoung had just said.

   "I panicked. It took me a minute to realize what he was saying, and that caused me to rush forward and ask him out in a desperate attempt to help to hold him together and keep his life that seemed to flicker, from being extinguished by his own action. When I look back on it now, I think I rushed forth with such gusto not only wanting to protect him, but to protect myself. I wouldn't be able to bear it if he had committed suicide when there was something I could of done to help him." Gongchan said, absentmindedly smiling, but Jinyoung knew that tucked behind that smile, was a sea of helplessness and pain, and Gongchan was drowning.

   "I rushed into a relationship with him, not knowing what fate had in store for me. We were both so happy the night that I asked him out, and everything seemed perfect. He told me that he wasn't very good with relationships, and that if I felt as if he were taking things to quickly, that I should tell him so and that he'll try to slow down. We had about a week together to talk, and everything seemed fine. I was able to find perfect balance, until Sandeul's life had thrown a wrench into mine."

   "After we had been dating for about a week and a half, something happened to Sandeul that made me unable to contact him, and when I could, we couldn't talk for very long at all. It had gotten so bad that we didn't talk for an entire week straight. It had completely broken my ability to keep him out of my thoughts. All I could ever do each day was to stay on alert for when he would be able to talk to me. It made me crave and depend on the attention that I would get from him until that craving would be the very thing that would drive him away..." Gongchan shuddered, despite the atmosphere in the restaurant being rather comfortable.

   "After he had stabilized his life, I tried to force us to spend every moment we could together, and it was working for a time. To me, he seemed like my absolute prince charming, everything that I could ask for in a guy. Then, one night, he frustrated me past my breaking point and I exploded at him and we fought. From that point, it was as if somebody had set our relationship on a cart and sent it rolling downhill with the tracks dumping off into a bottomless pit." 

   Jinyoung frowned at the wording that Gongchan used. It seems as the break-up really hit him hard and caused him to fall into a depressed state, and it seems like he never fully recovered. Putting his arm around his lost pup, he pulled him closer to try and comfort him better. The time had come for Jinyoung to press forth once more, and he loathed it. He saw how much strain it was putting on Gongchan's psyche, but he had to ' all the poison out of the snake bite', so to speak. Biting his lip, he advanced.

   "What happened?" Jinyoung's voice squeaked out. He was rather surprised at how frail his own voice sounded.

   "We would fight constantly. Him or I would get upset over the most stupid things, and say things that we didn't mean, completely caught up in the heat of the moment. At first, Sandeul would apologize for his behavior and I told him not to worry and that I had acted equally as horrible. Hurting him with my words hurt me twofold. Not only did I feel regret and guilt over what I said, but I would suffer with the pain of knowing that I had dipped my words in poison and aimed them at his heart. Eventually the poison did indeed seep into his heart and corrupt his love for me. He had slowly stopped caring about my feelings. He wouldn't tell me he was sorry anymore when we fought, and it got to the point where we fought basically every day. The craziness had gotten so bad, that I had showed up at Suzy and Minho's place sobbing at one point. They had to carry me inside because I had ended up collapsing from the absolute stranglehold that Sandeul had over my emotions. "

   "All this sanity-shattering activity started up at about the beginning of the third month of our relationship. At first, it was a fight about once every 4, maybe 5 days. The longest we went without fighting was an entire week. After that, the frequency of our screaming matches intensified until what happened at the cafe. What you saw at the café was Suzy giving Sandeul what I had been wanting to do to him for a month. He had broken up with me on the ride to the café, and when we got there, I saw him there with another boy, kissing him, with hickeys on his neck that seemed as if they were days old. That's why Suzy ended up exploding and accosted Sandeul. When he broke up with me, my mind went reeling. If I had been an outsider looking in, I would of seen the break-up coming from a mile away, but..."

   Gongchan's voice started to tremble, quiet tears rolling down his cheeks as he remembered the agonizing pain he felt when he heard the words that he never wanted to hear leave Sandeul's mouth, and over a phone call no less.

   "But, love blinds you. Although I had been going through hell, I still clung on tightly to the good times we would spend together. I was putting up with a relationship that was decaying, so I could live in a relationship that had yet to feel the harsh taint of reality."

   Jinyoung's mind tried desperately to absorb and process everything that Gongchan had been saying, but he just couldn't fathom how someone would be able to so irrevocable shatter this boy's heart. This boy, who seemed so focused, kind, collected, and passionate, could not be the same boy who's crying in his arms. The person whom he thought of as flawless, as someone so strong and sweet, could never be the person in front of him, the boy so broken and vulnerable.

   Deciding that enough was enough, as seeing his pup cry was a pain greater than any physical affliction, Jinyoung let go of Gongchan's hand that he had still been holding, and pulled the latter into a warm embrace, whispering how everything is going to be okay and how that he was here with him instead of Sandeul. Hearing these words shattered the last seal keeping Gongchan from sobbing. Hearing the sobs and feeling the younger boy's body heave with each breath underneath him, he knew it was time to leave this place.

   Not caring about the food that they're leaving behind, Jinyoung put the money that Baro gave him to pay for dinner, among a few other things, on the table. Gently pulling Gongchan up, Jinyoung walked him out the door and to the car, shooting bone-chilling glares at anyone who dared to give them anything more than a passing glance. 

   Setting Gongchan down softly in the car, whom at this point had started to calm down and cease his sobbing, Jinyoung had gotten in on the drivers' side, started up the car, and began the 10 minute drive back to their apartments. Although driving with just one hand was dangerous, Jinyoung didn't care. To him, what was more hurtful was the fact that there were tears still marring Gongchan's beautiful face and completely shattering his smile. Instead, Jin decided to just hold Gongchan's hand as they drove, still diverting most of his focus on the road.

   Pulling up, Jinyoung escorted Gongchan out of the car and led him into Gongchan's apartment. Knowing that it probably wouldn't be a good idea later, Jinyoung didn't care about the consequences of what he was about to do. Grabbing Gongchan's hand, he led his pup into the latter's own bedroom and laid him down on the bed, knowing that at this point, after such a powerful emotional experience, Gongchan is pretty much a husk for now, incapable of much thought or even wanting to think much at all anyway.

   Arriving at the part that he knew he might regret, depending on how it pans out in the morning, Jinyoung decided to walk outside onto the landing, lock his apartment door, and then walk back into Gongchan's apartment, shut the door and lock it. He was going to spend the night in Gongchan's bed with him, making sure that his pup had someone next to him that cared about him.

A/N: BABY DON'T CRY

TONIGHT

Now a few things here.

Firstly, I apologize for it being so long with such large blocks of text, but I just got into it so much that it was hard to remember that I should really split things up lol. 

Secondly, I KNOW THAT THAT WAS SUCH AN INTENSE CHAPTER! But to be honest with all my lovelies, that is an interpretation of my relationship with my first boyfriend. 

Third, no. Jinyoung and Gongchan don't do anything at all. The most that happens is some cuddling. Jinyoung would never take advantage of someone who is hurting that badly, ESPECIALLY his pup. 

Thanks for the love everyone! Stay amazing! <3