Naeun’s POV

This place is a paradise only if you’re here

A paradise that has locked you in against your will

A sad paradise that you won’t go if you’re awake

A paradise that we can be together forever

He’s not getting up…why he’s not getting up?

I’m getting anxious as I’m already sitting on the same chair for the past three hours. Myungsoo has got some medical operation that I don’t know but he didn’t wake up. The doctor said that he’s just exhausted because he’s over working his body and he didn’t get much sleep for these couple weeks. But why he’s not waking up?

I’m staring at his body lying soundly on the top of the bed. His hand is being injected with an IV, and he got some kind of thing that helps him to breathe easily. It’s being placed on his nose. I don’t know what that is, I just know that it helps him to breathe. I’m running my hand on the top of his head as I’m caressing his hair lightly. He looks fine like this, it seems like he looks in peace…but you’re going to wake up, right, Myungsoo?

I heard a low knock on the door before a doctor is coming inside the room. I’m quickly standing up before I bow my head lightly. The doctor is looking at Myungsoo for a while before he turns his head to face me, “I guess you’re Myungsoo’s guardian?”

“Yes. I’m Son Naeun.”

“I’m Myungsoo’s doctor, Ahn Jaehyo.” He gestures me, “Can we talk outside?”

I nod my head lightly before I’m checking on Myungsoo once more before I’m following him outside. I don’t know if Myungsoo has been going checking up on his sickness for how many since I just knew that he’s sick today. I got so many questions that I should ask to his doctor, but I don’t know what to say.

“Ms.Son…I know it’s too sudden but Myungsoo always told me that he didn’t tell anyone about his sickness…but maybe you should know because it’s already damaged his body.”

“I know…I know that he has brain cancer.”

“Well…in that case.” The doctor is putting his hand inside his pocket, “Mr.Kim’s case is already dangerous…he got stadium four for his cancer. And he didn’t want to do any treatment, and it’s already patient’s privilege if they want to get any treatment for their cancer or not.”

“So…what would happen to him?”

“For right now, his body is going to get weaker and sometimes he will lose conscious. The pain is going to get unbearable as well for his body to handle and it can make him pass out like what happen today. But I can’t give him more pain killer as he’s already drinking too much for these two months….” He looked at me, “And if it’s getting worse, the cells inside his body are going to be dying and he won’t be survived.”

“He won’t be survived?”

“That’s the worst thing that we want to avoid…but if you can persuade him to get some treatment, maybe, just maybe that he will have a chance of living more than he has right now.”

“I—I will try if I can make him changed his mind.”

“Alright, I will take my leave now.”

Doctor Ahn is about to moving his body before I called him once more, “Is Myungsoo going to be fine for now? He will wake up right?”

“He wills…I’m just giving him some medicines to make his body relax…he will be up in…” He stops his talking before he’s looking at his watch, “Probably in the next three hours. You can get some sleep or some food to eat. He will be fine.”

I nod my head lightly before I’m going inside Myungsoo’s room once more. His body is still not moving while his breath is steady like what I left him before. What should I do with you Myungsoo? Are you really going to leave me? Why? I’m running my hand on the top of his hair once more before I’m caressing his cheek, down to his nose and the to his lips.

I’ve been in love with this man for this long. I’m running towards other man because I’m just scared. I’m scared that he will break my heart again. He’s been doing it twice and I don’t want to be broken again. I can’t stand him anymore if he left me once more. I denied every little feeling that I felt whenever I near him, even when I felt my stomach is being knotted whenever his eyes are looking at me. Or when I feel sudden electricity through my body whenever he’s sitting near me or his skin is touching mine.

Because I’m a coward for not realizing it sooner. And now he’s lying soundly in front of me. For the first time, I feel really scared, scared that he will leave me for real. He won’t be there anymore when I need him; he won’t be here anymore to just hug me whenever I need someone to console me.

And without me notice, I’m crying once more. I’m crying once more, hopeless and waiting for him to come back to me, healthy and not sick like this. My cheek is already wet because of my tears and I don’t even want to wipe it away. Why are you doing this to me, Myungsoo….why?

“Naeun?”

I turn my head to the side when I see Myungsoo’s parents are already standing not far from where I am standing right now with Woohyun is standing behind them. I’m quickly standing up from my seat and throwing my body helpless to Mrs.Kim. I keep crying before she wraps her arms on my back and she’s running her hand on the top of my head, making me feel like a little kid for losing their favorite toys.

“It’s okay, sweetheart. It’s okay. Everything is going to be alright.”

“But—Myungsoo—He—“

“I know, we know. Woohyun had told me everything on the car.”

Mrs.Kim is releasing her hug before she puts her hand on my shoulder as she’s looking at me, “You look pale, Naeun, come let’s go and get some food. I know you’ve been in here. It’s almost dinner, sweetheart.”

“I’m not hungry…” I turn to see Myungsoo once more, “I don’t want to leave Myungsoo as well.”

“His dad will be in here, come let’s get some food for yourself. You can’t be sick, Myungsoo wouldn’t want that.”

“But—“

“I’ll take her.” I turn my body to see Woohyun is leaning against a door with his hands are crossing in front of his chest. “I haven’t had my dinner as well. You can stay in here, Mrs.Kim, I know you must be want to see your son. I will take Naeun with me.”

“Oh, sure.”

I don’t want to go with Woohyun alone. He’s too intimidating for me to handle. But before I refused his offe