Last Memories Of You

by LovesCrown

Title :   10/10

I pretty love the title. It kind of suit the title and I think it'll attract readers to read this fic. Good job.

Foreword / Description :   17/20

The description actually already tell the readers what will happen to them.

For me, it's like the story plot.

Grammar/Spelling:   25/30

Your grammar is fine but work on your punctuations. Adding unnecessary comas instead of full stops at the end is definitely not good.

For example,

"Is it awkward? Should I let it go?" ( , ) V asked Krystal who looked at him shocked.

"Yes." ( , ) Krystal replied and stood up.

Your spelling looks pretty fine but...

I think you tae my breathe away.

It should be written as : I think you took my breath away.

He had been looking for a girl to make her as his girl friend

Girl friend should be spelled girlfriend. It's a noun.

Plot :  8/10

Although the plot is quite cliche, it's a good and interesting idea.

Oh one thing. So, V is actually Krystal's and Jungkook's best friend, or just Krystal's best friend?

And it does not make sense when V was knocked down by the car and yet Krystal smiled at him? LOL.

I just thought it was weird.

Story flow :   7/10

Okay, as for the flow of the story, it's quite quick? And short?

I know it's a oneshot, but I'll be better if it's longer and more explanations of the story. It's your choice tho.

Characters combination (?) :   20/20

Although I'm not much of Krystal's fan, it's fine :D

And V~~ <3 lolxd

Bonus    8/10

Oh, one more thing. Avoid writing in a long paragraghs.

Readers normally don't like reading long passages.

It might be just me but yeah..

Total :   95/110

This is just my personal opinion. But if I'm too harsh, I'm sorry.

Don't forget to credit the shop!~

©inspiritfriend