A/N: Listen :)

————————————————-

The next several months passed slowly for you. Taewoo had been accepted to teach a university course in Japan for two months. He wanted to stay, but you knew how badly he had wanted to teach in Japan. So you made him go. Seojin had transferred schools at the end of the first semester to be closer to her parents. Her mother had gotten very ill and she needed to be near them to help take care of her.

Things around you kept moving forward. Meanwhile, your entire world had come crumbling down. How could you be expected to keep going on normally? You continued through your daily routine. But the world that had once seemed so full of color was now all shades of grey.

You walked out of your school and down the street toward the bus stop. Out of habit, you put in your headphones, but didn’t turn on music. You never music. It reminded you of him. You avoided anything that could bring your thoughts back to him. Maybe that was part of the reason you were thinking about actually leaving Korea.

No, it was the reason. Being here without him was miserable. Everywhere you turned his face, his voice or his group was there to remind you of everything.

When you made it to the bus stop, you waited, headphones still in and staring at your feet. A few minutes later, you felt a hand on your shoulder and were shaken out of you haze. You looked up to see Taewoo smiling at you.

"When did you get back?" You asked him, your voice sounding like a flat line.

"This morning. I couldn’t wait to see you. Let me take you home". You were hesitant to accept his offer. Doing so meant you would have to try and appear better than you were, but saying no wasn’t an option when Taewoo was involved. So you nodded, and got into his car as he held the door open for you.

The drive to your apartment wasn’t as bad as you anticipated. You could ask simple questions about Japan and they would keep Taewoo talking. He didn’t require much from you aside from occasional nods or looks of confusion or surprise.

When the car rounded the corner towards your building, you expected him to stop and let you out. However, he continued around into the parking lot under the complex. You looked at him in confusion, but he merely smiled at you. You knew arguing with him about it wouldn’t get you anywhere, so you just accepted that he was coming up.

The two of you made your way up to your apartment, kicked off your shows when you got inside, and you instantly went to the kitchen to busy yourself making food. It was better for you to stay busy. Too much time sitting still gave you too much time to think about Him.

As you started boiling noodles, Taewoo came in and leaned against the wall. He watched you for a moment before you spoke up.

"What?"

"How are you?" He asked with a small smile.

"I’m good, hanging in there." You gave the best impersonation of a smile that you could.

"You may be able to fool everyone else with that fake smile, but not me. How are you really?" You looked up into his eyes and you knew he wouldn’t let you get away with a false answer. So you took in another breathe and then spoke again.

"It’s hard. It’s been 5 months and I’m not any closer to being over him than I was the day that he…" You paused. This was the first time you had spoken about Him in…well you couldn’t actually remember the last time. “I’m thinking of going back home."

Taewoo stared at you. He had been watching you carefully as you spoke, and your last sentence caught him off guard.

"Will you be happier there?" He stepped away from the wall and towards you.

"I don’t know. But at least I won’t have to be reminded of him all the time. K-pop isn’t popular there."

"Maybe it seems like a distant memory now, but there was a time that you were here, and happy, before him." Taewoo continued towards you, and put his hands on your shoulders. “I think you could be happy again. You just need to let yourself. I know you’re scared, but maybe falling in love again will help. Maybe it’s what you need to really be over him."

You looked down and away from him. You couldn’t see how that could help. You didn’t have a heart to give, it still belonged to Him.

"I know you rejected me before, but that was when He was around. Please consider me again. I could be just what you need to be happy." Taewoo pulled you into his chest and wrapped his arms around you. You stiffened in the hug, but a very small part of you welcomed the warmth of his touch. You closed your eyes and your mind filled memories of being in an embrace, His embrace.

Your eyes shot open and you pulled back. “I’ll…think about it." Taewoo smiled a little. The two of you went back to talking about what had changed at the school while he had been away and about his time in Japan. After eating, and another few hours of visiting, Taewoo finally left.

You cleaned up, and then went to take a shower. You changed into a fresh set of pajamas and went to lay down in bed. You cuddled up to your stuffy, the only thing you allowed yourself to cling to that reminded you of Him. You had long ago buried your couple ring in the bottom of your jewelry box.

You stared at the ceiling and realized the world hadn’t seemed so grey when Taewoo was around. It wasn’t anywhere near as vibrant as it had been when He was here, but it wasn’t completely gray. Maybe if you were around Taewoo more, the world would start to get a little more color back. The thought was tempting, but part of you was afraid that if your world had color again, you would truly lose Him. You tried to shake all thought from your mind, reached over to turn the light off, and nestled into your bed, letting sleep take hold of you.

————————————————-

He watched from where his car was parked on the street below. It would be a lie to say he didn’t know everything that was going on with you. He knew Taewoo was coming back today, and he knew that he would go see you. So he had watched from afar as Taewoo took you home. He waited outside, from the exact spot he was in now, for Taewoo to leave.

He hated Taewoo because he could give you what He never could. Taewoo could give you a normal, happy life. He turned his head up to your window again and watched your light go out. He remembered the nights that now seemed so long ago that he had spent in that very room.

He looked down at the ring he still wore every day, even though he knew you had taken yours off months ago. To him, the promise he had made to love you and put you before everything else was still in effect.

He let out a deep breathe and then drove back to his dorm, where his idol life was waiting for him.