Story link

Review by Elimona

Title [8/10]

Personally, the title wouldn’t draw me in. I could already tell that it would be an angst story but I felt that it felt in well with your story. Also, when I searched for your story, there wasn’t any other stories with the same title as yours (and that is a hard thing to do, let me tell you) so well done! If there was one thing I would change, I would say that it’s actually grammatically correct for your Title to be, ‘Everyone Longs for True Love’.

Appearance [10/10]

Your layout was simple and there was no distracting background at all. It would be nice if you got a poster from a poster shop but since the story is supposed to be written in the point of view of two nameless people, and it probably would have been troublesome to find pictures of ulzzangs, I can understand the reason why you wouldn’t want a poster.

Description and foreword [7/10]

Description/Foreword: Your description was short and sweet. But like your title, it probably wouldn’t draw me in as I essentially knew what would happen in the story. Although I liked that for the foreword, you had a poem which I’m guessing that you wrote yourself. It was a breath of fresh air compared to the credits and disclaimers that are usually found in the foreword. However, I would suggest that you add an excerpt of your story which is what the foreword is there for.

Characters [7/10]

Characters: To me, Megan was a possessive woman who didn’t want Seungho to be with anyone else; especially when she threw the blue tie into the washing machine to make it turn red. But she did also love Seungho in her own way and desired for his true love- even if in her own slightly twisted way. Kelly was the only character I really liked in your whole story because she truly loved Seungho and only got engaged to Daniel because she was trying to get over Seungho. I only got an insight into what Seungho was like in the last chapter but I could tell that he really liked both Kelly and Megan and he probably would have fallen for Megan if he hadn’t met Kelly first.

Plot [30/40]

What I liked about the plot of your story was that you wrote in the two girls’ perspectives. However, I felt that it got a bit too confusing because of the different time frames and the fact that I didn’t know who was who at first. In addition, I was also confused by the fact the ‘Egan’ was actually ‘Megan’. Also it felt like a typical makjang drama where one woman can’t bear to let her man go so she tries to kill the other woman. It’s something that I could easily watch in a soap opera. But I was surprised when I read that Seungho was dating a man and it’s hard to make me shocked when I read fanfics.

Grammar and spelling [8/10]

Grammar and Spelling: You had a few mistakes with spelling. Apart from that, it was fine except for a few tense mistakes.
For example: Your shoulders visibility drooping as you opened the door.
Correction: Your shoulders visibly drooping as you opened the door. This mistake was just a simple typo- I’m guessing.
Example: I'd see you from where I sat,and I've noticed you for quite sometime, but you'd never look my way.
Correction: I would often see you from where I sat, and I had noticed you for quite some time, but you would never look my way. Rather than ‘I’ve’, it’s ‘I had’ because this is in the past tense.
Example: A blue tie that I've never seen before.
Correction: A blue tie that I had never seen before. Again, it’s ‘I had’, and not ‘I’ve’, because it’s in the past tense.

Overall enjoyment [7/10]

If I was being honest, I didn’t really feel anything for the characters; I couldn’t connect with them properly. This was mainly due to the fact that you just touched on their feelings. Rather than stating their feelings, you should describe their feelings in depth.
Apart from that, everything was fine and I wish you luck in your future stories!

Total [77/100]