Bang Yongguk could pinpoint the exact moment in his life when everything changed (in a bad way). He used to be somewhat of a loner. Not really avoiding people and human contact in general but not searching it either. His first (and only) girlfriend he'd had at that point dumped him because, according to her, he didn't show enough interest. He didn't argue with her back then because he knew she spoke the truth. She was his first kiss but not his first love.

All the calm in his life seemed to vanish in one specific moment. The time when his name appeared on a wall, or better said, on a poster on the wall. His popularity rose fast and Yongguk didn't know how to deal with it. The first time a girl crowded him in a corner acting all flirty Yongguk just stood there and allowed it to happen because it seemed the easiest thing to do.

It all got out of hand pretty fast but by the time he realized it was an issue he didn't care to change it anymore. So what if he went out with multiple girls at a time? It wasn't like he initiated any of those encounters.

The first time Yongguk met Himchan was the first time Yongguk got scared. He was calm and at peace when he told his parents he'll pursue music, he didn't break a sweat when he told them he'd move out to live with Junhong... heck he didn't feel that scared even that one time when the breaks on his motorcycle malfunctioned causing him to almost crash into a tree.

It was a normal college party. Many people he didn't know (and some he had no intention of getting to know), bodies grinding to commercial songs in a few of the rooms, suspicious noises coming from behind closed doors and industrial quantities of alcohol... normal college party scene.

While he knew he could be somehow described as a 'bad boy' Yongguk didn't think that tag fit him at all. A bad boy would've broken all the rules of traffic, common sense and self preservation and just diven himself home even though he had more than three cups. But here he was, sitting outside, leaning on a doghouse which he found hilarious for some reason - probably the number of shots had something to do with it – and calling the only person he could think of. Youngjae.

Anyone passing by would probably call the police. Loud music, screams every now and then and a weird, grinning and obviously drunk guy laughing alone creeping near the bushes. Yongguk didn't particullary care about all that, he just found the idea of Youngjae being a better driver than him, even in the state in which he was now, down right hilarious. But it was really his only option since Daehyun was visiting his parents and his little brother was on a school trip, not that he'd let Junhong drive but Jongup was a badass driver, sadly the latter was away on the same trip.

He dialed wrong twice. First because he couldn't quite remember if the last number was a 3 or a 5 and after his eyes got somehow blurry. Youngjae answered fast and Yongguk's remorse for calling at such hour vanished.

"Youngjae-ah, sorry to bother you but can you do me a big favor?"

"Yeah, sure" came the reply a bit later than expected and in a way that Yongguk knew the other was studying. When Youngjae slipped into 'study mode' nothing stood between him and textbooks.

"I went to this party and got carried away with drinks. Can you come pick me up? I've got the car here but I don't think it's a good idea to drive myself" he said after his younger friend prompted him to speak.

"I can't hyung"

Yongguk frowned. Did he do anything to piss off his dongsaeng lately?

"You're busy?"

"No but I haven't taken the cast off yet"

Yongguk wanted to slap himself for the silliness of the moment but decided it would hurt too much. He could always blame the drinking for this... error. He had totally forgotten Youngjae slipped on ice more than a week ago and had to put his right leg on a cast.

Youngjae laughed softly and Yongguk could almost see the younger boy send him teasing looks.

"Yah! It's not nice to make fun of your hyung..." muttered the rapper before focusing on the grass in front of him and tentatively taking a step. He felt the earth spin beneath his feet. "I'll just stick around until morning then" he said not wanting to take more of Youngjae's time and not particullary in the mood for the questioning which would surely come if the younger picked up on anything that went on in Yongguk's mind.

"Really hyung. Then why call in the first place? Where's the party anyway?"

"Minho's house, near.."

Yongguk got cut off "I know where it is"

"I might just drive home, take it slow, feeling better already" Yongguk didn't know if he was trying to lie to the oh-so-percieptive Youngjae or to himself.

"No way hyung. I know you. My roommate can come pick you up"

Anyone who knew even a little bit about Yongguk was sure to know he didn't like favors. He didn't mind doing any for his friends but he hated being on the recieving end. (A/N: MIND OUT OF THE GUTTER GUYS!)

Bang Yongguk wasn't a man who liked owing anyone anything.

"Too late" said the soft voice from the other side of the line "he agreed already. Look for a red convertable. See you in a bit hyung!"

Almost twenty minutes later Yongguk's brain was still doing the 'argue with yourself' act. He tried to convince himself he was feeling better and that he didn't need a stranger to come pick him up. Nevermind the stranger in question was one of Youngjae's friends, prolly the new kid mentioned a time or two in their conversations.

Yongguk saw the car approaching and he tried to picture the owner. It was obviously an expensive car, the kind you'd see late night at big clubs when the high society snobs showed up in their overpriced anything.

What Yongguk's mind didn't preview accurately at all was how the owner looked. The boy that stepped out of the car was nothing short of beautiful. If Yongguk didn't know better he'd look around for photographers of whichever high end magazine rulled the market at the time. The red haired male looked how the boy's skin almost shined in the soft lights coming from the house. As he got closer the impression changed from 'mode' to 'adorable model'. It was cold and the boy had nothing but too tight jeans, a fluffy looking jacket and a red scarf featuring bunnies on it. He looked around not spotting the rapper and his cheeks puffed slightly as he almost pouted.

Yongguk found him fascinating.

When the boy finally gazed towards him his eyes widened looking like a doe and he blushed, or Yongguk thought he blushed, the red tint on his cheeks could be atributed to the cold weather as well.

"Bang Yongguk-ssi?"

The moment when Yongguk heared the boy's voice something inside him clicked and he was met with a feeling which he only felt in one situation and one alone. It wasn't a feeling he could name but he knew it was tied just to his work. He didn't feel that when he was going on a date, holding hands with someone or even having . No ... it was that feeling that overwhelmed him when he got an idea for a song. Those moments of pure inspiration and his mind in utter chaos and, at the same time, tranquility.

That feeling was never associated with a person. That idea on it's own made a bubble of fear grow inside Yongguk. It only got worse on the long 20 minutes drive back to Youngjae's appartment.

~ * ~

Yongguk knew now why he was scared back then. It was purely because they simply fit. It was instant and intense. For a while the rapper avoided all contact with Himchan, it wasn't like it was hard to not meet the younger. It just felt odd to him. When that feeling struck he'd usually lock himself in his studio and make music until he passed out -most of the time that being literally what happened- because nothing else seemed to matter other than that and it was all he could focus on. But when that feeling was tied to a person Yongguk was at a loss.

It had taken him a while to miss it but eventually he couldn't resist temptation anymore. It was like an adrenaline rush. Yongguk was never addicted to anything (besides music but that was debateable) but now he was addicted to a PERSON. At first it was Himchan's simple presence, the knowledge that he was there, within reach and just one gaze away, then it was the unbreakable friendship that followed... Himchan was caring and soft, he always had something good to say and even though he was a bit of a diva at times (those being Youngjae's words), Yongguk could never wish for a better friend. Eventually he longed for more... a deeper connection and now he finally found it.

The red haired man couldn't but think of Youngjae's words from that night.

It wasn't long after they reached the flat that Himchan went to sleep after saying good night to the other two boys and recieveing a soft 'Thank you' from Yongguk.

The rapper was happy with the silence in the room. He didn't think he could sleep anyway, his mind was far too active for that.

"So.." Youngjae closed his notebook softly before pushing it away and focusing on his hyung "What happend?"

Yongguk didn't know why but he instantly thought of the Himchan-induced feelings, frowning slightly as he searched in his head for words to explain it. He must've been silent for quite a while because Youngjae spoke again.

"It's not like you to leave a party"

It took the rapper a few seconds to realize what his friend was speaking of and then he smiled awkwardly.

"Nothing much, I didn't feel like staying" he avoided looking into the other's eyes because then he'd be doomed for sure.

Sadly for him Youngjae was, as usually, having incredibly easy time figuring people out, Yongguk included.

"Suzy and Minho were... together" his voice was even lower than usual.

"I didn't know you two were serious" Youngjae had that thing about him. No matter if he was your friend or not, he would always side with the one who's morally right in an argument.

Yongguk looked down at the hot cup of dark coffee he barely even tasted.

"We weren't"

It wasn't the fact that his date was having with another guy, a somehow friend, because Yongguk wasn't lying when he said they weren't serious. It was more of what he heard her say.

"She said she's with me for the reputation and the money" he said simply before taking a big gulp of the beverage. It burned his tongue but nothing on his face hinted at that. It wasn't like he thought the girls he went out with were the right ones but he at least somehow, foolishly, thought they at least liked him if not loved him. It was silly and childish but he felt used.

"You're so silly Yongie" Youngjae said sofly as he moved to hug the elder. They didn't hug often, the blonde could count on the fingers of one hand how many times this happend. It was usually when Yongguk was sad, which wasn't often either, when the singer would call him Yongie and try to give him comfort.

They stood like that a while and Yongguk felt more awake. "There is one person out there Yongie, a person perfect for you. Just wait until you two meet. The relationship with that person will put everything before it to shame"

Yongguk didn't stay and wait for that magical relationship to happen but now, watching his boyfriend read one of the cheesy romance novels he kept all around his house, emotions desplayed clearly on his face (he'd frown in an adorable fashion when one of the characters did something he didn't like and smile before blushing when something slightly romantic happend) he knew Youngjae was right. Nothing could ever hold a candle to this.

~ * ~

Youngjae twiched as he watched the shining silvery top a hyperactive Daehyun was waving in his face.

"No."

Anyone sane would know that tone meant subject should stop there but Daehyun's sense of self preservation was lacking and so he didn't shut up and ignored the cloud of doom floating around Youngjae as they browsed around the 9^th (or was it 10^th) clothing store they visited.

"But Youngjae it would look so good with these pants!"

The blonde did the mistake of taking a glance at the pants Daehyun was holding and he wanted nothing more than to throw the shoe he had in hand at the older's head.

"It looks like some cheap stripper costume" he said flatly as he regretted, again, taking the other shopping with him.

"But it looks hot. Try it!" Daehyun pouted and gave Youngjae the puppy eyes.

The blonde scanned the outfit. A silver top combined with tight white pants and a golden jacket. Maybe Daehyun was colorblind. That would explain a lot..

"If I try it on ... will we leave already?" he asked and the boy before him nodded enthusiastically before pushing the items in his hands and nudging him towards the dressing room.

Youngjae struggled to pull up the pants and frowned looking into the mirror. He quickly thought about maybe going to the gym but stopped as soon as he realized he was putting accent on physical appearance which was surely odd for him to do.

"There. I tried it. I don't like it. I'll change so we can go home" he said loudly enough for Daehyun to hear.

"No way! I need to see"

The blonde was about to reply when the door opened almost hitting him and Daehyun stepped inside before closing it again. Youngjae blushed "Are you insane?"

Daehyun on the other hand, didn't seem to pay his words any attention. His eyes were scanning him from head to toe (well, the other way around if he was to be precise) and Youngjae knew his face couldn't get more red when Daehyun's tongue slowly moved along his lower lip before biting on his thick lower lip.

The air in the small dressing room seemed to vanish and Youngjae was at a loss on how to react.

"You should totally get this"

Daehyun's eyes seemed darker and his breath came in small pants.

Youngjae knew he paniked because he found himself nodding, anything as long as he managed to get out of this situation. He moved awkwardly to open the door intending on shoving the slightly older boy out but accidentally managed to come to a half hugging position, his body slowly brushing the other's.

Daehyun's small groan made Youngjae's jaw drop and his eyes go wide.

________________

A/N: To show how much I regret the obviously small previous chapters... this one's a bit more substantial in length.

Had both my exams today and while I think I did good nothing's certain before the list's posted which will be on friday. Until then I need to do anything in my power to stop myself from overthinking what would happen if I didn't do well so I'll probably be on a writing spree.

I'd like to say sorry for any mistakes found in this chapter or the other ones but I do not have anyone going over these so ... I'm trying my best.

Thank you all for the wonderful comments <3

Hope you enjoyed the chapter!