Sheet 10

 

 

How long has it been?

 

It’s been two weeks. Two weeks the star hasn’t come home. His friends told me before I left the hospital that they would bring Yoochun back to Seoul later that day. It was his parents’ orders. It is not that his mom and dad don’t trust the medical practitioners back at Jeju, they just wished for the star to be within their reach. The four said his family got him a personal doctor and nurse to look after him in the safe corners of their abode. So he really hasn’t been around recently. I felt alone because of it. I had no one to bother. I simply experienced a bit of emptiness. It’s not that my mom and Hyekyo aren’t good companions, he solely makes my every day complete whenever I see him.

 

In short, I miss him. I miss that crazy rude man which resulted to, me staring at the headband he bought me. Park Yoochun, are you coming back or are you staying at your parents’ home for good? I wish you would contact me, let me know so I would stop thinking about you and move on. Tell me if I have done enough for you; tell me you can stand on your own now. T-tell me you n-no longer need my h-help.

 

“If you keep staring at that thing it might melt.” A voice echoed beside me.

 

Could it be Yoochun?

 

My head jerked towards the direction of the voice to only find Yook Sungjae. I hesitantly stood up from the stoop, located at the main door of the apartment house and met his eyes.

 

“What are you doing here Sungjae?” I asked.

I saw him pout his lips, “Hey, don’t I get a hello first?”

 

“Sorry.” I paused and then carried on, “Hello, Sungjae…what brings you here?”

 

The pretty boy’s face darkened, “Now you’re too formal. What’s with you?”

The question should be what’s wrong with him. I said a ‘hello’ already… wasn’t that enough?

 

I had a phony grin plastered on my face, “Forgive me, it’s that there has been a lot going on and stuff…” I attempted to explain.

“Why don’t you share it to me then? I am ready to listen.” He presented himself.

“I don’t think you would understand it’s a bit complicated.” I excused.

Sungjae shot me a puzzled look, “I’m sure I can catch on easily.”

 

I released a soft sigh, “Uh I-I have to go.” I spun around ready to enter when he held my wrist.

“Jamkkanman… Let’s talk.” Sungjae asserted. I gaped back at him and saw his piercing eyes. This guy is not playing around anymore.

 

I escorted him to the rooftop where we could talk privately since almost no one goes there. We both sat down on an old bench placed in front of a beautiful view of the city. What made it more breath-taking is the stunning orange sky. I was reverted back to reality when Sungjae opened up, “So have you thought about it?”

 

“Thought about what?” I replied acting clueless.

I heard him sough heavily, “About giving me a second chance.”

 

“Sungjae…” I halted for a moment and glanced at him, his innocent eyes gradually meeting mine. He patiently waited for my answer as his look got deeper. It did not matter to the both of us that there was silence. All we could hear was the strong brush of the wind. I bit my lips , gathered all my courage and grabbed his warm hands.

 

“Sungjae, I’ll be honest. It was really wonderful to see you again. I am also flattered that after a long time you still liked me… but I don’t think I feel the same.” I uttered as my grip got tighter for some unknown reason.

The pretty boy forced a smirk, “Is that so?”

“I am glad you told me the truth.” He pursued, “I was really curious about what you thought about me. I will feel sane now.”

“I am really sorry Sungjae.” I apologized for rejecting him. I was clearly the one who abandoned him, and when he came back and asked to start over, I pushed him further away. I am such a bad person.

 

Sungjae suddenly laughed at my statement, “Don’t say that Minah… I totally understand. I don’t want to force myself to someone who doesn’t like me anymore.”

 

I sluggishly released his hands from my grasp and retrieved mine. I could no longer look at him so I focused my eyes somewhere else.

I wasn’t fully relieved that I was able to confess…

“Minah.” He addressed.

“Yes?”

“I should get going.” He blurted gradually standing up. I on the other hand kept avoiding his stare.

“I guess I’ll see you around then…” he remarked with an unsure tone.

“Yeah I guess.” I bobbed my head.

“Bye Minah, thank you for being honest.” He ended and began walking away.

 

I felt the lingering bitterness surrounding me. Nature was with me for the air got colder, too cold actually. I am not used to rejecting people; it is just not in me to do something harsh like that. So I don’t like what I did earlier… Although I had no choice, I had to tell him, instead of raising his hopes up. It’s better to say it before things got too serious between us. The remaining love or I might say attraction, I had left was not strong enough to give him the second chance he was asking for. It would be useless if I said yes. Sungjae will just waste his time and effort on a wrong girl…

 

 I got interrupted when I heeded rough footsteps from behind.

“Sungjae, leave please…  If you have anything else to say, tell me some other time.” I instantly reacted.

“What are you talking about Minah? I just got here.”

That husky voice…

My body was enlivened.  I sprung up and twirled around, “Yoochun!!!” I exclaimed rushing towards the star-who still looked slightly frail-. I jumped on him and secured him in a tight embrace. However I soon let go for he complained, “He-hey my wounds.”

 

“Sorry. I couldn’t control myself.”  I apologized with a smiling face. I had no hint he still had bandages over that cardigan he’s wearing since the one on his face was completely healed.

“My wounds aren’t okay yet so no touching.” He warned.

“Alright.” I sheepishly nodded.

Yoochun grew awkward because my gaze was locked at him.

“Why are you staring at me like that?”

“I just missed you.” I was blunt with my words all of a sudden.

The star had nothing else to reply so he cleared his throat. He kept looking at me back and forth, acting so restless after my statement.

I wouldn’t wonder why he was reacting like that. I am surprised myself. Probably this excitement I am experiencing led me to be that frank.

“Could you close your eyes or something? I am finding it very challenging to stand in front of you.” He declared as he turned his back at me.

 

How cute…

 

I chuckled, “Okay… I’ll stare at the cement instead.”

“Uhm, so what are you doing here all by yourself?” he asked, trying to start a different conversation.

“Oh, I wanted some fresh air…” I lied and kept my focus at the floor.

 

“Really? ‘Coz I saw that Sungjae guy coming down the stairs. I was going to say hi, but it seemed like he was too absorbed in his thoughts that he hardly recognized me.” He narrated.

 

My head flew up, “You saw him…?”

“Yeah.”He responded.

“Who else would he visit here but you?” He added.

 

“Let’s not talk about that Yoochun.” I stopped him before he asked for details about our encounter.

“If you say so.” He continued, “Oh yeah… want to go out or something?” finally facing me.

“Go out where?”

“Do you remember that dokbogki place with the ajumma, the free soju…’” he tried to reiterate, “Let’s go back there.”

 

“Only the two of us?” I wondered.

“Well, if you want, you can bring your mom and Hyekyo—” I cut him off, “No it’s okay.”

“So the two of us.” he uncomfortably muttered.

“Yup.” I eagerly bobbed my head up and down.

“L-let’s go then.” The star stuttered a little and then led the way.

 

~•~•~•~•~

 

Yoochun and I leisurely made our way to the dokbogki stand from before. Since it was extra cold tonight, spicy rice cakes and Soju would be the perfect way to keep myself warm.

 

Also I did notice the star’s presence then and now, totally changed. I could see a huge smile on his face, his aura is very vibrant and his stance radiated confidence.

 

“You feel better?” I queried wanting to break the ice.

“Yup.” He answered happily as he shot me a beam. He knew I wasn't asking about his physical condition but his emotional state.

“Wow, I have to get used to you being like this now.” I admitted.

“What do you mean?” he innocently asked.

“I need to get use to the real you now. The joyful, quirky, well-mannered star everyone loved.”

Yoochun just snickered at my words and concentrated back to walking, so did I.

 

We were only a few steps away from the place when he suddenly spoke up, “I became like this again, thanks to you.” The star captured me with his genuine gaze. It is unlike any other look he gave me. It was so special, I felt so special.

 

“You are welcome.” I replied and managed to smile at him. He placed his hand on my shoulder and grinned back, after that he continued striding towards the street cart and again I sheepishly trailed behind him.

 

The ajumma was very happy to see us… I mean Yoochun, enter the tent. People were still busy to notice the undisguised star. Too bad ‘coz I was expecting screams, the place was populated mostly by middle-aged men so it’s reasonable.

 

“It’s is very nice to see you here again Yoochun.” She greeted us with a plastered grin.

“It’s good to be back ajumma.” He courteously replied.

“Come sit.” She directed us to an empty table near the food, “Please enjoy your stay here.” She added before attending to the other guests.

 

“See the ajumma also missed you.” I remarked.

 

Before the star could speak the ajumma, ran back to us tagging someone along with her.

 

“This is my daughter.” She introduced her teenage girl carrying a tray with a bowl of steaming dokbogki and 2 bottles of Soju.

“Annyeonghasaeyo, Dahae imnida.” The girl shyly stated her name and set down the stuff on her tray.

“Nice to meet you Dahae.” Yoochun smiled.

“Excuse me.” Her mother left for a moment to tend to the newly arrived customers.

 

Afterwards the young fan requested if they could take pictures. Yoochun, delighted by her, agreed and took about three photos on the girl’s phone.

 

“Thank you.” She blushed.

“Oh, why don’t we take one on my phone this time?” he suggested.

 

“Alright.” She chirped.

“1, 2, 3…” he counted.

 

“Thank you again, Yoochun oppa. Hope you have a comeback soon.” She cheered.

“I will come back soon.” He positively uttered.

“Fighting!” she ended and continued helping her mom.

 

Now that the mini 'fanmeet’ was over I began eating.

 

“You’re going back to make music?” I questioned still preoccupied with filling my tummy.

“I think I am.”

“That’s great.” I blurted my mouth full of rice cakes.

 

All these changes are happening too fast for me…

 

“I am quite uncertain when though.” He added stuffing himself as well.

 

“You don’t have to rush… It’s better to take your time.” I advised, even if I lacked knowledge about the business.

“I will take things slow.”

 

I don’t know what happened but the whole conversation just stopped from there. We both ate silently… and for some reason it did not feel uneasy at all.

 

Anyway, the idea of him planning to have a comeback bothered me. It means I could no longer see him since he’ll be busy again. I am pretty sure he’s going to move out that old crummy apartment house too and back to his luxurious place. This only means that I should start moving on too… Right?

 

On the other hand I am very glad things are getting a lot better for Yoochun. It wasn’t long ago when he rudely talked back at me, or ignored me or rolled his eyes at me. That sense of fulfillment somehow reigned over my thoughts of him leaving. I disregarded other related matters and continued eating while enjoying his company.

 

~•~•~•~•~

 

We relaxed at one of the benches in a park after consuming so much rice cakes our stomachs could handle.Yoochun brought me here since he did not wish to go home yet.

 

“I missed the outside world!” he exclaimed as he did a few stretches here and there.

 

“Oh yeah, before I forget I would like you to hear this new song I wrote and composed.” The star continued fishing out his mobile phone in his jeans' pocket.

 

He browsed through his files and opened it, “Here.” and held the phone’s speakers near my left ear.

“Listen carefully.” Yoochun advised.

 

The first thing I heard was the mild melody of the piano, and then the song built up around the chorus. His voice meanwhile sounded so tranquil. The lyrics were about forgetting his past love and moving on with life; very similar to his story. Although it soon halted before the bridge was even over.

 

     I glanced at him wondering why. He grinned and said, “It’s not finished yet.”

 

“Although it is not yet done, it was great.” I complimented.

 

“Thank you.” He humbly stated and retrieved his phone back.

“Actually, I was able to write and composea few more songs together with the one you just heard.” He informed.

“It looks like you got your ‘touch’ back.” I joked, remembering his past statement I heeded over the news.

 

“I guess.” He chuckled, “I wrote mostly ballads though. Haven’t written something upbeat, like something you can dance too.” He uttered trying to dance a bit.

 

“I am sure it will come to you soon.” I stated trying to hold back my laughter.

“Should I have dance songs with choreography like this?” he asked executing weird-looking dance steps I don’t know where he could have possibly learned.

 

“Stop it, please! You look so horrible.” I begged not able to contain my amusement.

“Maybe I should do these.” Yoochun immediately stood up doing more odd moves.

 

I couldn’t stop snickering because of him. He kept going and going until I had a hard time catching my breath. It did not matter to him if there were a few passersby, he merely ignored them.

 

“Stop it! You look crazy!” I cried but it was not able to refrain him from further embarassing himself.

 

“Then why don’t you come help me?” the star suddenly grabbed me and forced my body to dance along with him. I had no idea what the heck we were doing grooving without music but because I was with him, I kind of enjoyed it, even if people stared at us. This randomness from him was unexpected.

 

“Come on Minah! You have to do better than that!” he taunted acting sillier. I just went along and did steps I usually see on music videos but I can barely perform them well.

 

“You’re such a bad dancer!” he lightly insulted.

 

I just laughed off his statement and carried on. Yoochun couldn’t take it and drew near me, “Yah, what are you doing? That is not dancing.”

 

“I am sorry I was never gifted with that talent.” I defended.

“Loosen up your body, you’re too stiff!” he ordered, flapping my arms around, “Try doing this.” He demonstrated a wave.

“How do I possibly do that?” I wondered, clueless as to how I should command my body to do such a thing.

“Let me help you.” The star went behind me and without notice, held my hands.

 

“You put up your arms sideward then slowly wave it.” He instructed but I failed to follow. I just can’t comprehend how to make my arm fluid-like and the fact he was tightly holding my hands hindered me from learning.

 

I felt his warm breath touch my right shoulder. His voice then echoed at my ear, “Can you follow?” The star’s face was too close all of a sudden that I froze in place and became speechless. It wasn’t long enough before he realized I wasn’t answering. I heeded him gulp and then pulled back his hands and head away from me. I gradually spun around and saw him blushing, for the first time.

 

“Y-you’re b-b-blushing.” I stuttered.

“What?! It’s probably the Soju.” He strongly objected.

“Alright… whatever you say.” I said not rebutting anymore.

“Uh… Let’s just go home.” He initiated leaving first.

I giggled at his reaction and caught up with the-blushing-star.

 

~•~•~•~•~

 

Author's Note: 

     Updated! It's pretty short though. :D Comments are loved! :P