a/n: as I had promised, here's the rest of this chapter...

it's a deal lot shorter since... i just had my hair cut...

and it was an EFFING 8 inches, 8 INCHES!!!! cut!

my hair was reaching my waist, and now it's barely past my shoulders! ugh! why did i even agree with my mom to cut my hair???

and now i just want my long hair back...

“Are you sure…we’ve been here lots of times before?” Lia asked as she looked around the amusement park, unconvinced.

“Of course. We spent much too many times here.” I replied as I dragged her to get some tickets. “Well, at least during school breaks. Why are you even skeptical? Even with amnesia, teenagers love to hang out in amusement parks! You should at least know that.” I teased and she pouted, smacking me lightly. It’s a habit of hers, one Sehun and I both dread and secretly love.

“It’s not what I meant! It’s just that this place gives me a queasy feeling.” she replied and walked towards one tent that had many plushy displays.

Queasy my , she’s already drawn towards the kinds of tents she always visits when we go to amusement parks.

I followed her and dragged her to one of the rides, the rollercoaster. She visibly paled as she watch the cars go twirling some fifty to a hundred feet above us, the passengers screaming their guts out.

“Let’s try this first before we get something in our stomachs.” I grinned.

She was protesting but I got her to be pushed down on a seat next to me, strapped and waiting for the cars to go up the railway.

“I am so going to kill you after this!” she griped and held on to the safety bars, knuckles turning white.

I don’t really know what came over me but I grabbed her hand and intertwined it with mine. We’ve ridden so many roller coasters before, all of them with her always telling me she’d kill me after the ride, but I’ve never had this urge to reassure that everything was going to be fine and she’ll have a good time. I’ve never even thought about holding her hand before.

Okay. I’m lying. I did often wonder how it would feel like to hold her hands. It’s not as if I don’t know how they feel. Her palms are soft, her fingers calloused from endless writing and composing, the tips covered with harder callous from playing her guitar. I admit that I did think about holding her hands like how I hold the hands of many previous girls I’ve dated. But I’ve never really think I’d do it like this.

Her hand instinctively held on to mine as the cars moved up and I could feel the trembles racking through her.

“Hey, everything’s going to be fun! I’ll always be here!” I said, squeezing her hand a bit just so she would understand what I meant. I bet she can’t even hear me past the squeals and screams coming from the other people on the ride.

I felt her calm down her hands stopped shaking. And as the cars started to plunge down and the screams of mortification and excitement erupted from the passengers, I couldn’t help but to think how perfect her hands fit mine.

“Okay…I think I know why we would have always hang out here.” Lia grinned as she slumped on the bench beside me, a large chocolate smoothie in hand. “It was really fun!” she laughed.

“Told you.” I answered.

She kept on laughing and recalling everything that we had done today, and I can’t help but stare. Had her smile always been that blinding?

“Are you even listening to me?” she pouted.

Her pout, it’s so cute. She's so cute!

Wait. I did not just think that…

“I am.” I said, mentally slapping my face. Way to go, Kim Jongin. You have just been caught drooling over your best friend.

Ugh! That sounds so wrong!

“Yeah, right. You were like drooling all over the place.” she laughed and ruffled my hair.

We stayed looking at each other for a few seconds before she cleared and looked away.

Well, wasn’t that just… awkward.

“Well, it’s kind of getting dark, want to grab some food before we go home?” I asked as I stretched my overly worked muscled. They ache, but I wouldn’t have wanted to spend the day differently.

“Yeah!” she enthusiastically jumped. “I want some street food!”

I couldn’t help but chuckle. “You’re such a er for food. What a glutton.” I teased.

“Yah! Is it wrong to love eating? It‘s one of our basic needs!” she clucked her tongue.

“Mhmm.” I grinned as I started for the park’s exit, making sure that she wasn’t far behind me. I couldn’t held on to her since she got her hands glued on her smoothie. Even if I want to… it would just be awkward… and I’m really nervous about holding her hand again.

It’s confusing.

Suddenly, a hand grabbed the scruff of my jacket. I turned and she was looking at me sheepishly.

“Can I hold on? I don’t want to lose you.” she smiled, that soft inquiringly look on her face.

My heart gave a jolt. Somehow, her words sent my world whirling in a dizzying pace. She had been holding on to me because she doesn’t want to lose our friendship. And all these time, I couldn’t see it.

I took her hand from my jacket and held it tightly, bringing her closer, just so no one was getting on our way.

“You don’t have to ask. I’ll be holding on to you from now on.”

We finished the last of our french-fries covered hotdogs as we neared our neighborhood. It’s barely past 9 in the evening and since Lia’s parents know I was with her, I knew they weren’t that worried about the two of us being out later than usual since she had came back from the hospital.

We were talking about everything and nothing at all as we made our way to her doorstep, laughing at the most random of things we had seen all afternoon that we were out. I don’t even want to think about it but…it feels like we had just been out on a date.

Yeah right!

“Hey, thanks.” she mumbled as we were a few feet from their door.

“Thanks? For what?” I asked. My cheeks were almost numb because of endless smiling all afternoon and I wont be surprised if the smile would be permanently etched on my face.

“For taking me out.” she replied, adjusting her jacket since it’s unnaturally cold tonight for summer.

“You’re always out with Sehun. It shouldn’t have been a difference.” I said.

I meant it to but somehow the thought of her coming to my place earlier today because Sehun couldn’t take her out popped into my mind and it kind of… hurts. To be the replacement person. I know it’s not like that, Sehun and I are both her best friends.

But I still can’t help but be jealous.

She looked at me with wide eager eyes. “Yah, it’s not even like that! I really wanted to hang out with you. Not just because Sehun couldn’t make it.” she said. “I mean, I like hanging out with Sehunnie. I’m always comfortable with him! He makes me laugh and helps me a lot so I won’t be depressed because I can’t remember things about me. But you… you make me feel different. Even if this is just the second time we’ve hang out together since I got out from the hospital, somehow I like being with you. You make me fell… happy. Not that Sehun doesn’t, because he does. It‘s just that being with you is…a different kind of happy.” she blabbered.

I make her fell happy.

Somehow, just hearing those words, I feel…happy too.

Why? I don’t even know. Just thinking that she’s happy being with me makes me want to keep her inside my pocket and hold her close for every second and every minute.

Wait!

That’s just…kind of creepy.

And incredibly cheesy!

“Yah, am I clown to you?” I teased, hoping that these crazy thoughts are not visible on my face. How come I’m having these stupid cheesy thoughts when I’m with her?

She pouted as she looked at me. “It’s not like that!” she whined.

I chuckled and zipped her jacket up to her neck. “Yeah, yeah. Just go inside. It’s getting late, and not to mention cold, out here.” I patted her head a bit and pushed her towards their front door.

I turned around and made my way home but before I even get to reach halfway out of their front yard, Lia called me back. When I turned around, warm soft lips touched my cheek.

“Thanks, Kai. Really.” she murmured, her warm breath caressing my cheeks before she stood back down from her tiptoes (she’s a good deal shorter than me), a smile making her eyes twinkle in the night. “Have a good night, Kai.” she said before running inside their house.

Wow.

She had just kissed me.

I could feel my heart beating so fast it could probably beat the fastest racehorse.

It took me a while to remember that I was standing in the middle of their front yard like a retard. I walked towards our house in a daze, the warmth of her lips still fresh in my memory. I can still smell her soft scent lingering around me as if she was still there. I resist the urge to touch my face, specifically my cheek where she kissed me. That would just be too…I don’t know!

How would you feel if your best friend kissed you and make your forget that the world was spinning eastwards? Or was it to the west? Argh! I don’t even know!

“What the hell are you playing at, Kai?” a familiar low voice yanked me out of he space I had been hurtled into.

Sehun. And he didn’t looked happy too.

Sehun’s face had always been devoid of emotion, making him look like a cold person to those who do not know him personally. He would only drop the blank face when he’s with the people he’s comfortable with. Knowing him for years, I know it when his blank face wasn’t only a blank one.

And right now, it says that he’s kind of pissed.

“Sehun.” I greeted, “What are you doing here?”

He stepped closer to me, and even though we were of the same height, the look on his face makes me tingle inside, in a not so good way.

“Are you thinking of making her fall for you, Kai? Wasn’t it enough that she fell for you before and got hurt? Must she fall for you again this time?” Sehun asked, looking at me straight in the eyes. His voice is in that usual monotone, but I hear it otherwise.

“Sehun, it’s not even like that. I care for her. I just want to help her.” I replied as calm as I could. “And why are you even acting like I intentionally hurt her? I never knew she fell in love with me, Sehun.” I said in my defense.

“And so now that you know, you suddenly feel guilty so you are doing all of this?” Sehun’s tone was mocking.

“Hey, I am doing this because I care about her. I know I had been a jerk before, that is why I’m trying my best to make up for it.” I glared. Best friend or not, Sehun’s close to stepping on the line.

Sehun gave me a hard look. “Are you sure it’s just like that, or because you are falling for her too?”

“What?” I asked, dumbfounded.

I mean, sure. I have this somehow crazy reaction to her, but does that actually mean I’m falling for her?

“I told you not to be selfish, Kai. Don’t go acting like you like her and realize it’s just because you feel guilty. If you hurt her again, you’ll lose both of your best friends.” Sehun said before walking towards his dad’s car which was parked a little away on a dark corner of our street.

“What about you, Sehun?” I called out. “Why are you being so overprotective? Is it just because you care as a friend?”

He stopped. After a few seconds he proceeded towards the car and got in without answering me. He drove off into the night, leaving me with the muddling questions inside my head.

Do I like Lia more than a friend?

My friends kept telling me cryptic things about Lia before, even Eunhee. (wow, I haven’t even thought of her since…that day when Lia confessed.)

And there’s Sehun. Why does he really act the way he does towards Lia?

This question was answered a few minutes after I got into my room.

Sehun sent me a short message.

From: buingbuingThehun 2/3/13

Lia is my everything.
 

a/n: do you feel it? it's on for the Dance Machines!

Happy birthday KYUHYUNNIE! again...

and now i'll go cry myself to sleep and hope that my hair won't give me nightmares...

see you on the next update... i'll be trying my skills with angstsy crack... i hope it won't be a fail...

please anticipate...