(Onew's p.o.v.)

I looked at the crouching figure in front of me, unsure of what to do or what to say. The person who meant the world to me was in the verge of crumbling down right before me. He was breaking down and I could do nothing, nothing at all.

What do you do when the love of your life is bawling their eyes out because of someone else? How was I supposed to help him nurse his shattered heart as my own heart was shattering, his each tear drop a blow to it, his each shaky whisper adding fuel to the fire burring inside.

‘H..he doesn’t lo..love me…’ he sobbed, his whole form shaking. ‘H..he said..he said tha..that it…it was a..all ju..just a st..stupid be..bet…’

I bit the inside of my mouth, containing my anger from bursting open. I bit a bit too hard, because I could taste the metallic, saltiness of blood. If only I could get my hand on that bastard. Just for once.

‘He…he never l..loved me hyung…it was all a lie..a lie…’ he looked up at me, trails of tears rolling down his perfect skin, leaving tear stains.

I could not take it anymore. Moving closer to him, I took him in my arms; making sure that my hols on him was secure. He snuggled closer to me, putting his face on the crook of my neck, wetting it. But I didn’t mind. For him I would do anything.

‘He didn’t deserve you Tae. It’s his loss.’ I whispered into his ears as I rocked him back and forth, drawing soothing circles on his back with my fingertips. This always calmed him down.

‘If he didn’t see how great you are…well he is an idiot. You deserved way better anyway…forget him.’

‘but I loved him Jinki hyung. I loved him with all my heart, and he crushed it.’ His sobbing grew louder. I could feel my heart writhing in its cage, bleeding.

‘I know Tae, I know….and it’s his loss. You’ll find someone better. Someone who’ll cherish you for who you are….’ I trailed off. My mind screaming at me to take the chance and confess, but it wasn’t the right time. Not now. Not ever. He would never think of me that way.

I shook my head and concentrated back at the shivering form on my embrace.

‘Tae you don’t need someone like him anyway…you can do way better.’

‘But I want him hyung.’ One sentence. One sentence was enough to crush all my hope. I could feel my own tears streaming down my face now. I couldn’t put up the façade of a concerned hyung anymore. I could not hold back my own emoting from bursting out.

Taemin probably felt something was wrong. He pulled himself away from me to gaze at me with his bloodshot eyes, his lips still trembling.

‘Hy..hyung? are you crying?’ he sounded unsure. His hand shot up to wipe away the assaulting liquid from my face, his touch sending shivers down my spine.

‘Why? Hyung don’t cry…’ his voice trembled but his sobbing had stopped. His eyes were full of concern.

I felt like a useless scumbag for not being able to bottle up my emotions. I was supposed to console him, I was supposed to be the shoulder he cried on, not the other way around. I sniffled,

‘It’s nothing Tae..I’m fine. Just don’t cry okay? I can’t see you cry.’ I pulled him back in my embrace and continued to rock him back and forth. He resisted at first but stopped after a while. I could feel his breathing evening out. He was asleep. I should have probably put him on his bed but I could not stop myself from wanting to hold him from a bit longer.

I laid back on the sofa, his head resting on my shoulder. His smell was like and intoxicating drug to my senses. I could feel myself relax and before I knew it I too fell asleep.