Dear Chanyeol-ssi,

I’m sorry for my sudden departure but I did not wish to impose on you any further. I truly appreciate everything that you did for me this last month and I hope to see you soon.

Baekhyun

Chanyeol sighed as he read the note that Baekhyun had left him again; he’d lost count of how many times he’d read it since that day the model had left.

He was lonely and he felt guilty as well. Byun Baekhyun had gained a reputation as a cheater, a and someone who couldn't be trusted after the newspapers got word of his break up with Lu Han. Since he was quite famous, the news had spread like wildfire. Though he did wonder why it had taken almost two months for this to reach the ears of the paparazzi.

And that had been about three months ago; Chanyeol hadn't had a chance to work with him or see him at all. Chanyeol seriously missed him; the pictures that he had were now barely enough to satisfy him.

For lack of a better way of putting it, Chanyeol was craving Baekhyun. Usually he was satisfied since he got to work with the other often enough, so he at least got to see him, talk to him, occasionally touch him…

It was starting to feel like that month that Baekhyun had lived with him had never happened.

The photographer sighed deeply and buried him face into his hands. If asked, he would say that he loved Baekhyun, but in reality it was borderline obsession. Chanyeol didn't just want him anymore, he needed him, had a hunger for him that just couldn’t be satisfied and it really made him question if he really loved him, or if it was just lust. 

It had been so long since he got to physically see his Baekhyun; he was sure if he just got to see him again all doubts would disappear.

As luck would have it, the very next day there was Baekhyun.

Sehun had dragged Chanyeol into a coffee shop near his apartment on their way to a shoot. The younger male actually hated coffee, but he was desperate to stay awake that day. Sehun had told Chanyeol that the coffee he made was probably the most disgusting thing that he'd ever tasted. The photographer had just laughed this off.

Chanyeol hadn't recognized the model at first in the coffee shop. Baekhyun had been wearing an oversized sweater with the hood pulled over his head, skinny jeans, and sneakers, so he blended in with the other people.

It wasn’t until he had heard Baekhyun's soft and familiar voice, despite all the noise in the shop, did he realize it was him. And for a long moment he stared at him unsure what to do now that he did.

"Baekhyun-ssi!" Chanyeol then called across the shop loudly.

He saw the other tense slightly and knew that he was right. A few heads turned to stare at the awkwardly tall and loud male but then just shook their heads slowly and turned back to whatever they had been doing before. And then Baekhyun was leaving the shop, walking quickly and briskly to the exit and leaving.

"W-wait!" Chanyeol yelled before beginning to run after Baekhyun.

He chased him out of the cafe and on to the street where Baekhyun was walking like he was trying to get away as fast as possible.

"Baekhyun-ssi! Wait!" The photographer called after him, slightly oblivious to the fact that the other didn't seem to want to see him.

And then he finally caught up, reaching out a long arm and grabbing Baekhyun's wrist.

"Baekhyun-ssi!" Chanyeol panted, finally having gotten him to stop.

Baekhyun whirled around to face the photographer, a slight scowl on his face.

"What do you want?" He asked, his voice raspy.

Chanyeol gasped at the sight of the model. He had dark eye bags, his eyes were red like he had been crying recently, and he just looked tired, so very tired. Baekhyun's cheeks were also a bit sunken and it was obvious his clothes were too big for him, much to big. This was not to say that the other wasn't still beautiful, because to Chanyeol he always would be, but there was just something lacking…

"Baekhyun-ssi," Chanyeol stuttered, releasing his wrist. "I…"

"What?" He spat, but there was no energy behind what would have been an angry motion; he just seemed to be extremely on edge. "Are you here to laugh at me too? It was because of you that I'm like this, you know? I threw myself into my work because for some reason people seem to like my new reputation, this person that I'm not. And now I'm working all day and night, trying to keep my mind off of him, but I just can't… and I'm lonely, just so lonely…"

Baekhyun trailed off, tears now sliding down his face.

Chanyeol’s face was twisted with sadness as he took a couple steps closer, not stopping until he was right in front of him.

"What is wrong with me, Chanyeol-ssi?" He sniffed. "Why doesn't he love me?"

Unsure if there was anything he could say that could change anything, Chanyeol just slowly pulled the other into his arms rather protectively.

"Nothing," He whispered. "You're perfect…"

The model didn’t say anything in response to Chanyeol’s words, but buried his face into the other's shoulder, and continued to cry. At some point Baekhyun also placed his arms around the taller male.

The two of them received a couple of strange looks but no one said anything; Chanyeol would have been relieved if his attention hadn’t all been focused on Baekhyun.

"Baekhyun-ssi," Chanyeol muttered eventually, and sadly. "I'm sorry but I need to go to work…"

Baekhyun's arms around him tightened.

"No, please… I've just been so lonely…" He sniffled; Chanyeol could feel himself melt. If that day's photo shoot hadn't been so extremely important, he would have skipped it for him. "Please…"

"Um, how about this," Chanyeol was trying to come up with a plan that would work for both of them. "Here are my keys and you can go to my apartment and I'll try to be back as soon as possible?"

Chanyeol offered, holding out his keys, after separating himself from the other. Baekhyun actually smiled as he accepted them from him.

"Thank you very much," He replied, holding the keys tightly.

"Great, so my apartment is-"

"I remember where it is," Baekhyun replied. "I'll be waiting for you, Chanyeol-ah."

The photographer nodded and smiled as he watched the other begin to walk away. Wait, what had Baekhyun called him? He had said Chanyeol-ah, hadn't he?

Chanyeol smiled widely all the way to work, while silently wondering if this meant that the other had perhaps changed his mind about him, or them, even. He'd been so happy that he hadn't even realize that he'd left Sehun behind until he heard the frantic shouts of the other coming from down the street.

"Hyung! Stop leaving me behind!" Sehun protested as he skidded to a stop in front of the photographer.

"I'm sorry, Sehun-ah," Chanyeol replied, a wide smile still on his lips. "I was a little distracted…"

Sehun rolled his eyes and started to walk away.

"Hey, wait up!" It was now Chanyeol's turn to chase after the other. "How are you and Lu Han doing?"

Sehun froze at the mention of that name.

"I…don't want to talk about it…" Sehun mumbled.

"What? Why?" Chanyeol asked, worried. "Did something happen?"

"Let's just go okay, hyung?" And then he was rushing away again leaving Chanyeol imagining the worst-case scenario.

The photographer got back to his apartment later than usual that day. The shoot had taken longer because the models were being uncooperative and well, they just weren't Baekhyun, and no one looked as good as Baekhyun.

He got back to find the door unlocked, which surprised him, so he just entered and was about to call out the other's name when he saw a familiar soft head of brown hair on the couch. The soft breathing told Chanyeol that Baekhyun was asleep.

Smiling to himself, he locked the door behind him and moved to the kitchen having barely eaten the entire day. He was about to open the fridge when he noticed that there was food on the table and it looked freshly prepared; had Baekhyun made this for him? Or them, even? His smile grew wider at the thought. Byun Baekhyun cooking for him.

Sure, the two of them had lived together for that one month but Chanyeol hadn't let him lift a finger especially after that one incident. Walking over to the couch, he knelt down next to Baekhyun and brushed some hair out of the other's eyes. That was when the model starting tossing and turning causing Chanyeol to remove his hand away immediately, afraid that he had caused this.

"Lu Han…" Baekhyun gasped in his sleep. "Please… don't…"

The photographer reached a hand over and was about to shake the other awake from his nightmare when Baekhyun's eyes snapped open. His eyes were wide with fear as he shifted away from Chanyeol.

"Please don't hurt me…" He breathed out, his voice high and he sounded absolutely terrified. "I'm sorry…"

"I'm not going to hurt you, Baekhyun-ah," He whispered as he moved closer slowly. "I promise."

"Ch-Chanyeol-ah…" He whispered, as he visibly relaxed.

"There, there," Chanyeol told him gently. "Are you okay?"

The photographer sat down next the model and instantly regretted the decision when he saw tears well up in Baekhyun's eyes.

"I'm sorry, Baekhyun-ah!" He quickly said and started to shift away slowly. "You don't-!"

Baekhyun startled Chanyeol by, rather suddenly, diving into his arms and then burying his face into the photographer's chest.

"I-it's okay," Chanyeol whispered as he placed his arms around the smaller male. "I'm here for you…"

The model was crying now, and he was shifting around in the photographer’s arms like he was uncomfortable or even like he was fighting with himself. Chanyeol just pulled him closer trying to get him to relax. And eventually he did, but then he was crying harder.

As horrible as it sounded, Chanyeol was almost enjoying this, or more specifically this opportunity to just hold the man of his dreams like this. So when Baekhyun tried to move away, Chanyeol let out a soft sound of protest, but released him anyways.

“Chanyeol-ah…” Baekhyun’s voice was barely audible. “I’m sorry…”

He had his head down, and his bangs were covering his eyes, like he was ashamed of his action. Chanyeol smiled a little as he reached out and brushed some hair out of the other’s eyes.

“Why are you apologizing?” He asked softly before placing a gentle kiss upon the other’s forehead. “You haven’t done anything wrong.”

Chanyeol had realized some time ago that Baekhyun seemed to be quite emotionally fragile, and it made him really wonder why that was. Nevertheless, he found himself to be especially careful around the other, always afraid that he could upset him.

“Chanyeol-ah…” Baekhyun began again, actually looking at him now, a light blush across his cheeks. “Will you… listen to me?”

The way he had voiced this simple request made Chanyeol’s heart beat faster.

“Of course,” Was all he managed to reply with, his throat had gone dry at the thought of what Baekhyun was about to tell him.

“Lu Han…” The model began, and that was all Chanyeol needed to hear to know that this was the beginning of a painful recollection of memories.

End of chapter 9

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Well, there we go, another chapter ^_^ I hope you liked it owo

Thank you to all my subscribers and people who comment! i love you guys ^_^ <3

So until next time, which... uh... will probably be some time before the end of next week. bye! ^_^