Rian always thought that she was the better secret keeper between the two of them. Sure, Yoo Jin could tell if she was lying at a glance but that does not mean she was totally hopeless when it came to keeping a secret from him. After all, she had spent most of her remaining senior year in Kirin High, orchestrating the downfall of Shin Hae Song without anyone’s knowledge and she knew about Yoo Jin’s past history with his mother, yet she feigned innocence when they were in the company of each other.

She just never expected that Jin Yoo Jin was much better at keeping secrets of his own despite they had been best friends and housemates for over a year.

Her dark-lined eyes narrowed at the buzzing sound that broke her concentration and ultimately led her to abandon her yoga session in favour to terminating that nuisance. This was not the first time her yoga session was cut short due the continuously droning noise but today was going to be the last of it. She was done putting up with that atrocity. Off she went, wreaking havoc in the living room.

To say the living room was in a mess was an understatement. Books lay scattered all over the floor. The couch had its pillows upturned. The fallen leaves and flowers decorated the flower pots. The (much unneeded) oak study desk placed at the corner of the living room had its drawers yanked out and hanging precariously in mid-away.  Magazines littered the top of the coffee table.

After two hours or more, she reluctantly gave up on her quest to search for the source of the irritating sound. was dry from all that hunting. On the contrary to popular belief, their apartment was not as squeaky clean as they claimed to be. Lately, her maid had been showering her with excuses (saying schedule was jam-packed with recordings for the upcoming album) and only returned at the wee hours of morning when Rian was fast asleep and unable to nag him about fulfilling the punishment for losing the previous. And so, the apartment had been steadily collecting and adding more dust bunnies, all thanks to Jin Yoo Jin’s lazy .

The actress stormed off from the living room into the kitchen and pulled her glass out from the upper cabinet. She set the glass on the kitchen counter and opened the refrigerator door, yanked out a carton of orange juice. Pouring herself a cup of orange juice, she placed the carton back into the refrigerator and returned her attention to the cluttered living room.

“Crap,” murmured she, at the same moment, several scenarios containing her death in Yoo Jin’s hands flashed in her eyes. All involved the rock star blatantly yelling at her for the mess she made. Yup, that was it; her official cause of death – brutal nagging committed by one arrogant rock star.

All in a sudden, she remembered Ailee whining about how she had nothing productive to do during weekends. A huge smirk formed on her face, surely with a quick phone call, her former band mate definitely would rush to her apartment to help (she owed Rian a favour after dragging her into her crazy scheme to stalk her then-boyfriend in which they spent sixteen hours tracking his trails all over Japan).

Downing the last drop of her orange juice, Rian rinsed the glass with soap and water before placing it in the rack. She paced into the living room, now searching for her phone. Snatching her phone from the coffee table, something on the floorboard caught her brown eyes. It was a familiar looking Smartphone. She stooped low and picked the phone up.

“Ah, that stupid idiot left his phone again,” Rian muttered. The phone stirred in her palm, nearly made her jumped and dropping the phone. Instinct made her quick to pick up the call. Before she could reply, it died. Then, another buzzing sound was heard. She noticed the number displayed was a foreign one, but against her better judgement, she decided to take the call.

She heard the door behind her clicked open and spun around to face her soon-to-be-murder, with his phone still latched to her ears. Their eyes met briefly, she held her breath and waited for the exploding badgering. It never came. Instead, she remembered hearing the phone crashed on to the wooden floorboard and his hand was closed to her ears.

The phone escaped from her grip and they exchanged glances. Neither had the guts to make the first move in their staring contest. Rian mustered all her faltering courage and spoke, “You should visit. He’s your-

“He is not my father. My father is dead,” he barked, effectively ending their conversation and left her in the living room alone. “Yoo Jin ah,” she called out, softly. The typical slamming of the door was done. Sighing, the actress began to clear up the living room. In this condition, she cannot talk to him and rely on him to clean the living room for her.

She did manage to get Ailee to help her. It took the former idol a lot of convincing to do, which the girl refused to budge until she actually promised to indulge Ailee a small spoiler for the latest drama she had been obsessing about. After five hours later, victory was in their hands and the living room was clean like never before.

“Oh, before I forget and leave, here’s the wine you asked,” said Ailee, procuring a bottle of wine from her Louis Vuitton’s handbag. A smile graced Rian’s lips, mouthed, “Thanks. And remember, nobody is supposed to know that I hooked up with the male lead’s brother yet.” Placing it on the counter, she waved goodbye and closed the door behind her.

Rian stretched her aching limbs and retreated into the comfort of her bedroom. All that cleaning made her sweat and now she felt hot and sticky. After a much-needed and refreshing shower, Rian emerged out from the bathtub and slipped into her cosy, pink coloured polka dots pyjamas.

One last gaze at her vanity mirror, Rian chanted as she put on a huge beam, “He’s being such a baby. You did it once with his mother; you can do it again with his old dad.” She left her room, went into the kitchen, fetched two empty champagne glasses and the bottle of wine before kicking his door with her legs (thanks to the taekwondo lessons she had been taking for her upcoming action film).

Behind the door was Jin Yoo Jin, with his hawk-like eyes widened as big as it was possible for him. There he was, sitting on his bed, his “baby” guitar in his arms and looking very crossed at her. She pretended not to see that shock expression in his eyes and set the glasses on his piano and took a seat next to him.

“I knew that girl always had a fine eye for wine. Nana would simply get me a cheap soju and justified it by saying soju and wines are both alcohol and there was no need to waste extra money for alcohol,” Rian muttered.

She poured the wine into their respective glasses and held his glass out, she gave a slight kick at his leg and forced him to receive the wine. Yoo Jin learned that it was better to participate in her charade rather than trying to escape him (the hard way had him nearly being murdered with a butter knife) and quickly accepted her glass.

“Sometimes, I wonder how would life turned out different if he was alive. After all, when he’s around, he made sure that mom doesn’t go haywire and that life in the entertainment industry would be fun. Instead of joining HershE, my debut would be in a small role in some kind of television series or film.”

They were really similar to each other more than she liked to admit. Everyone knew their mothers were one of their pillars of strength, aside from each other. Their fathers were a case clouded with mystery, to the public and to themselves.

She does not like to speak of the man because it invoked sadness and vulnerability, reminded her of the possibilities of a different future in which she was not the sole breadwinner, not the actress who cannot act, not the singer who cannot sing, but just a normal school girl.  He does not speak of it because the man who promised to be there for him in worst of times, turned his back on his son when he needed the man he called his father the most.

“Do you think that was possible?” She raised her brows, casting a quick look at the confused look on Yoo Jin’s face. She sipped her wine before continuing. “My dad died when I was nine,” she spoke, staring nowhere but her glass, swishing its content around.

It was a taboo subject. They only spoke about it once. That night when she came into his room with wine and glasses, after kicking his bedroom door opened.

“My dad died when he and my mom divorced and he remarried and had other children,” he simply stated, void of emotion and looking away from Rian’s beautiful face. The coast fell silent for a while. Each glancing at the magnificent view of the Seoul through his bedroom windows and the actress cleared , “Dead or not dead. This one is dying. You should go and see for one last time. If I were you, I would do it no matter how terrible his crime was to my family.”

“And if I don’t?” he questioned, strumming his guitar’s strings meaninglessly, making random noises. “It is up to you, really. If you do, you’ll please the old man’s heart and yours, even if you hate him that badly. If you don’t, it doesn’t matter until it comes biting your when your stubborn son does it,” she grinned at the last sentence.

“Then, I will just have to make sure I don’t have a son in the future,” he replied, smugly with a hint of amusement. “Yeah as if you can do such thing and it is much worse when it comes to daughters, believe me. They can hold grudges much longer than you men can by a fold of ten times. Even if you are six feet under doesn’t guarantee a visit.”

Yoo Jin seemed to be giving her words a thought, and then violently shaking his head. “You women are heartless. Fine, I’ll go if and only if you join me along,” he returned, begrudgingly. Rian chuckled and held her pinkie finger out, “Deal.” He hooked his bigger pinkie finger into hers and shook it.  

She came to her feet and began to walk out towards the badly treated door before Yoo Jin’s voice called out to her. “Thanks for the wine.” “Whatever, you just make sure you don’t turn up in the hospital drunk.”

She recalled standing next to the door while the dying elder Jin embraced his son with the rest of his family members present in the hospital. Though Yoo Jin barely could keep with his fake façade, Rian glared at the rock star to mind his manners when meeting his old man. The elder Jin ordered the others to leave them alone, except her because Yoo Jin requested it.

It was heart-breaking to see his father begging for forgiveness and Yoo Jin refused to give the old man the one thing he wanted the most from his son. She promised not to interfere; there was nothing she could do anyway, he was a stubborn man and a hurt boy mashed into one.

They left the hospital an hour later. She had waited for the tears of sadness to come but it never came. Instead he acted like nothing had happened and she let him be.

When his father finally passed away, she practically had to drag him to the funeral at midnight. There were no other else except them, his step siblings, his mother and the dead old man’s wife. She was kind to allow them to stay a little longer. She saw him staring at his father’s portrait, tears threatened to fall and she took it as a sign to leave him.

His family members, including his dear old mother, swarmed and engulfed him in a gigantic hug. It made her smiled as her legs brought her towards the door, she felt her left hand being pulled, forcing to halt on her spot.

She glanced to her hand, surprise etched on her smooth face as she caught a glimpse of familiar callous hand. Their eyes met momentarily and he did not need to say anything; she would stay as long as he needed her.