Sometimes, Oh Sehun feels like he is incapable of speaking. He'll try to form a coherent sentence, but then his thoughts distract him as his self-loathing kicks in. It's like his mind has a giant traffic sign flashing 'No one understands what you're going on about! Be quiet!'

In this way, he has always been his own villain; and oftentimes it makes him everyone else's too. He blames his brain, but really it's his demons, whispering in his ear that he will never be more than what he is, and what the people before him are. That he will always be alone in a room full of his friends, because he will never be able to express his thoughts, so they will never be able to see the most human parts of him. 

But, Sol understood. 

Where does he even start when it comes to Sol? Most times he can only think of how things ended between them. He lied to her, to put it simply. Congratulations Oh Sehun, you kicked out the one other occupant of that tarnished mind of yours! And he's lived everyday since regretting it. Because, funny enough, trauma can't be healed by doing everything you can to push it down and far away from you. He was only fifteen when he thought that was how he had to deal with everything. He was only eight when his mother practically told him that. "Hun, you just need to ignore it, okay? It'll be easier if you just take care of yourself.'  He's pretty sure she underestimated how much an eight year old understood, or else she probably wouldn't have said anything to him at all. 

"My life's not a sob story, please don't make it one." Sehun had told his secret best friend, patting her head softly. "You know...sometimes I just wished they'd get a divorce and stop making it everyone's problem." That was the one time he'd been capable of articulating his thoughts loud and clear. 

The most important thing to know about Oh Sehun is this: He lives in memories just as much as Byun Jinsol, because they both secretly long for what they had.

"This assignments so stupid." Sehun complained, setting his cup down on Baekhyun's desk as he sat down on the chair in front of it. Baekhyun was still sprawled out on his bed like he'd been two hours ago when he got home from classes. Sehun didn't show up till ten minutes ago, though. 

Baekhyun yawned, "The creative writing one? Sol was complaining about that one too." 

Sehun shook his head, "No. I finished that one days ago, I'm talking about that group project I mentioned to you." Sehun wasn't one to complain about school, but group projects were the exception. Especially when said project involved planning a pitch for a fictional business with a bunch of people who'd rather be out partying. "At least they're actually getting some of the work done, albeit at the same pace a snail would." He said, chewing on the inside of his cheek. Sehun went to take a drink of his tea, but instead it overflowed onto his hand. He hurriedly set it back down, cursing under his breath as the hot liquid turned his skin an ugly shade of red. "Ugh, I'll be right back." Sehun muttered, walking out of Baekhyun's room and in the direction of the bathroom. When he got there, he turned the cold water on, and let it run over his hand. 

He couldn't help but notice the different perfume and hair products that littered the counter tops. He'd gotten used to this just being Baekhyun's space, he'd gotten used to her not being around. His senses must have dulled, because he didn't notice Someone walking behind him, until the tap was turned off. He swerved his head to the side, and there, right beside him, Jinsol was pulling her hand back from the tap. "The sink was going to overflow." 

He would have looked down to see if what she said was true, but he couldn't move when she was so close. 

Jinsol seemed to notice their lack-of-distance too, because she took one big step to the side, "I'm just grabbing- this." She held up a dry shampoo. The