Karina

---

 

Christmas was nice but I think mas favorite ko na yung New Year, it's because of someone na mukang puppy. 

 

January 1 is Cael's birthday and she told me na mamaya, they will be celebrating it with her family. 

 

She said na lagi nilang ginagawa yun ever since she was little, after daw nung New Year's eve friends nya naman daw yung kasama nya magcelebrate. 

 

Earlier, akala ko she's celebraring with Nanay Wilma pa rin just like nung christmas, but she told me na nandun sila ng family nya sa side ng mom niya sa Cavite.

 

We videocalled each other kanina and she's with a kid nanaman. It's funny because mukha na rin siyang bata tapos baby face pa. 

 

She can be childish sometimes, pero with her nephews and nieces lang. 

 

I'm not gonna lie but, her being good with kids make my heart flutter. 

 

Ewan ko, kinikilig lang talaga ako everytime. 

 

That's just one of the reasons why I like her. 

 

I just watched them play kanina. Compared to her pamangkins on her father's side, she only have 1 sa mother's side and it's a girl. 

 

A funny thing din pala kanina, super unexpected makita si Cael playing with barbie dolls! 

 

I mean she's all tough and cold kasi diba tapos kanina I just saw her play with barbie dolls kasama si Thea, her niece.

 

It's sooo funny and adorable! 

 

I took some screenshots so I can have something to . 

 

Siguro if her friends will see these, sobrang asarin talaga siya, especially Ryujin and Hyunjin. 

 

Sadly, we had to cut our call because both of us are needed for some errands. 

 

I'm getting to know her better as the days passed, I learned many things about her na din. 

 

Well for one, she's VERY observant. 

 

Everytime na we got a chance to call each other, she's always the one to ask me if I'm okay or what am I feeling. 

 

That makes her thoughtful too. 

 

I always ask her din naman if she's okay or what but lagi talaga siyang nauuna. 

 

When she's focused or confused, you'll know it kasi you'll see a little crease on her forehead. She does that kapag focused or confused lang. 

 

Her favorite foods are mostly snacks, yup, snacks. She said na she can trade real foods for snacks. 

 

See? Sometimes she's really childish but in an adorable way. 

 

She loves a strawberry drink! It's called nutriboost if I'm not mistaken. 

 

I don't know if it's a good thing or bad but she drinks it twice a day. 

 

I asked her why, she said na masarap lang daw talaga. She said na there's a chocolate flavor but she prefers the strawberry daw. 

 

Hay nako, Cael. 

 

You're so cute. 

 

 

 

We'll be celebrating her birthday tomorrow since ayun naman talaga yung day ng birthday niya. 

 

It's not a surprise din kasi it's too obvious naman, I can't expect Ryujin to shut up kaya even if gagawa ng surprise, our friend can accidentally reveal it so, no. 

 

It's a simple celebration, we'll just go to EK kasi it's been a long time na daw since nung last punta nila. 

 

Before that we'll have lunch muna, ang init pa din kasi that time so we'll go sa EK maybe afternoon na. 

 

May van yung family nila Ning, the initial plan was to rent the van but tita said na birthday gift na lang daw nila kay Cael yun. 

 

Hyunjin will be driving, Ryujin volunteered na magpalit na lang sila if pagod na siya magdrive. 

 

It was Cael who volunteered to drive at first but her friends didn't let her. They said na special day ni Cael yun so they won't let her do things na nakakapagod. 

 

They're really sweet kaso sometimes lang, most of the time magulo sila lalo na yung dalawang jin. 

 

After that, we'll go to Tagaytay because we rented an airbnb for 2 days, there's no classes pa naman eh. 

 

We didn't spend so much money, yung gagamitin lang for EK. Ate Seul told me na they'll take care of the expenses sa airbnb and others. 

 

I didn't agree at first, nakakahiya kasi but she told me that she's just being grateful kasi I'm making Cael happy.

 

So yeah, that's the plan. 

 

I can't wait to spend the day with her. 

 

Another thing pala, I'll stop her from courting me na kasi I don't want her to do things just because she's courting me. 

 

I'm not doubting her pero kasi sabi nila, yung true attitude daw lalabas if nasa relationship na talaga, so yeah. I think totoo din naman kasi yun. 

 

My phone chimed so kinuha ko 'to and tinignan yung notification.

 

Message

HBD, taglamig

ryujinbilog: happy birthday mahal quoh mwa 

pretty ning: happy birthday, captain! 

hwang2: hbd idol lodicakes! 

taglamig: ang aga nyo bumati hahahaha

hwang1: happy birthday, winter! 

boss gi: bukas na yung bati ko, wag nyo ko manduhan

ryujinbilog: pero pag si bubba okay lang? 

hwang2: malamang jowa nya, jowa ka ba?

pretty ning: nag-away pa nga sila

commander: stoooop na hahahaha

hwang1: ayan na ang commander

hwang1: no greetings, rina? 

taglamig: bukas pa naman talaga birthday ko hehe

commander: happy birthday, grumpy :))

ryujinbilog: YOOOOOOWN

boss gi: wag masyado kiligin @taglamig 

taglamig: gago hahahahaha

prettty ning: omg i'm so proud of you girl @commander

hwang1: pinalaki ka namin ng tama huhu

hwang2: boom tanggal angas moments ni @taglamig

 

I was smiling the entire conversation, siguro namumula na siya ngayon. 

 

She's not used kasi na ako yung nagfifirst move samin or the one who's being brave in actions.

 

Ang bilis niya mamula when it's like that and super cute nya. I swear, I don't know why they're afraid of her eh softie naman siya once you get to know her. 

 

Sobrang baby nya kaya, parang gusto ko na lang siya alagaan all day. 

 

Syempre baby ko siya eh.

 

Ugh! Nahahawa na talaga ko kay Ning, kainis.

 

 

******

 

It's 9 in the evening and they're setting up the speakers sa labas namin. I told them na wag na bumili ng fireworks or any firecrackers because it pollutes the air, so we resolve into blasting songs from our speakers later.

 

I'm with my relatives sa father side, it's alternate kasi when celebrating holidays. 

 

When we spend christmas sa side nila mom, dapat yung new year kila dad. The the next year vice versa naman, it's always like that, just like kila Cael.

 

She called kanina, hawak niya si Thea pero tulog. 

 

It always amuse me na napapatulog niya yung mga pamangkin niya. Most kids kasi diba before sila matulog they're making a fuss, sa kanya hindi. They literally just clung sa kanya then a few moments tulog na. 

 

Then ayun, she told me na she'll call later kapag 11 na, in the mean time, I'll bond with my cousins muna. 

 

 

 

"Truth or dare?" Our cousin asked me.

 

"Ate Jess! You're scaring the kid." That's our other cousin, Kuya Chan. 

 

We're playing truth or dare kasi, this is their way of making us spill the tea about our ganaps sa life. 

 

The one who's asking me is Ate Jessica, the oldest among us na cousins. 

 

"Truth." I answered then she smirked, parang mali yata yung answer ko. 

 

We're sitting in circle, facing each other. There's eight of us here which means complete kaming magpipinsan.

 

"Who's Winter Kim to you?" 

 

Oh, no. 

 

I'm doomed. 

 

"She's someone close to me." I answered, I don't want to tell them pa, I want to introduce her sa family kapag official na kami. 

 

They're not satisfied sa answer ko but Kuya Chan saved me by telling them na i-continue na yung game. 

 

It landed on our youngest and they asked her a question. 

 

How did Ate Jess knew her? 

 

Do they really know each other? 

 

My head is hurting sa kakaisip, sobrang curious 'ko na tuloy. 

 

Ate Jessica and Ate Krystal are sisters, sila yung panganay sa cousins. 

 

Next is Kuya Chan, Kuya Vernon, and their sister Seeun. Which is the youngest among us. 

 

Then ako na only child. 

 

Then yung twins, Kai and Chanty, they're just older by a year or months lang ata kay Seeun. 

 

We're all close but mas close ako to those three na younger sakin, it's the siguro. I'm just 2 years older lang naman sa kanila. 

 

Working na sa Ate Jess and Ate Krystal tapos our kuyas are in college na, leaving us in highschool pero by ilang months I'll enter the university na din. 

 

Nakailang rotation pa before the game ended, thankfully and luckily, hindi ako natapatan nung bottle, phew. 

 

Time check, it's 30 minutes before 11pm. We stopped playing na to help our relatives and families sa mga need pang gawin. 

 

There's nothing much to do naman na, the foods are already in the table, the music and souns sytems are okay na din. We'll just wait for the countdown.

 

But syempre, what I'm waiting for the most is Cael's birthday. 

 

It's fascinating because later new year siya for most people including me, pero parang at the same time new life siya for me and Cael.

 

I'm sitting on one of our bean bags here sa living room when our two ates sat sa couch beside me. 

 

Suddenly, bumalik yung curiosity ko about Ate Jess asking me kanina kung sino si Cael. 

 

The three of us are just sitting beside each other, no one is speaking until Ate Stal blurted something. 

 

"Seulgi's my ex back in high school." 

 

OH MY GOD. 

 

I looked at her with wide eyes, like asking if what she said was true. 

 

She just scrunched her nose and nodded. 

 

HOLY— DAMN. 

 

Then I turned my attention to Ate Jess, I don't know what to expect but I'm sure she has something to say din. 

 

"When I was in college, I dated Taeyeon, Winter's sister." 

 

OH GOD. 

 

IS THIS REAL? 

 

If it's possible, my eyes went bigger and my jaw dropped. 

 

How?! 

 

I mean, oh my god. I didn't know these things! 

 

How did they manage to hide it? 

 

My eyes went back and forth to the two and both of them are sporting an awkward smile. 

 

Something I rarely see from them. 

 

So it's true. Oh my god. 

 

I suddenly stared at the TV in front of us, I need a moment to absorb these informations. 

 

They stayed quiet, siguro binibigyan ako ng time. 

 

I really, really don't know na connected din sila sa other important person sa buhay ng manliligaw ko. 

 

Wait, wait. 

 

If Ate Jess dated Cael's sister, ibig sabihin kaya nya ako tinanong kanina kasi she really knew Cael? 

 

BUT, sino naman ang nagsabi sa kanya na there's something going on samin ni Cael?

 

Ang sakit talaga sa ulo! 

 

When I recovered from being shock, I turned sa kanilang dalawa, I'm going to ask them all my questions. From how did they met to why did they end and everything in between. 

 

"Ate Stal, how did you.. and Ate Seulgi?" I asked. 

 

I can't make proper sentences pa because I'm still absorbing all those things. I think nagets naman niya kasi tinawanan niya 'ko. 

 

"Alumni din ako sa school nyo, remember?" She said while smiling. 

 

Oh, I forgot! She attended the same school nga pala, yeah. I nodded to let her continue what she was saying. 

 

"It's a long story but she's really shy when we're in highschool. She's just confident when she's dancing and singing kaya may parang mini fansclub siya, she's really that popular." Ate Stal told me. 

 

"I was one of those people na may crush sa kanya, knowing na mahiyain siya, I'm the one who made the move. If I'll wait for her siguro hindi na naging kami." 

 

Oh wow, that's.. new. 

 

Ate Stal doesn't do first moves.

 

"To cut the story short, we became official but we stayed lowkey. We lasted for 2 years. The break-up was a mutual decision, we're still immature pa that time eh." 

 

"Do you have any communication with her?" I asked. 

 

"I have. We're actually good friends, pati si Irene. I also saw their kid maybe 2-3 times na." She answered while smiling. 

 

"Can I ask you something, ate? This is a bit personal, you can refuse to answer naman." Curious kasi talaga ako. 

 

"Mahal ko pa ba?" She said while smiling knowingly at me. 

 

Napayuko ako sa hiya, am I that obvious?

 

"What I had with Seul was magical. I can't compare it with anything or anyone. There will still be a place in my heart na nasa kanya na kasi afterall, she's my first love. I'm just really happy for the both of us, kasi we deserve what we have right now."

 

Then she patted my cheek while smiling. 

 

I smiled back at her. I can see naman the genuine happiness that Ate Stal have right now, it' reflecting in her eyes naman kasi. 

 

"Enough of me, ayan si Ate Jess, ask her." She said while pointing at her older sister. 

 

I turned my attention to Ate Jess, parang I don't want to ask na lang but the look that she's giving me is an encouraging one. 

 

"Wait, baby. What's your relationship talaga kay Winter?" She asked me first.

 

Should I?

 

Anyway, they'll find out din naman and besides, silang dalawa lang naman makakaalam.

 

"Uhm.. ano po, she's courting me." I hesitantly told them then avoided their eyes, I don't know nahiya ako bigla. 

 

"Rina, you're super red right now." Ate Stal said and tinawanan nila akong dalawa. 

 

"We get it, baby. You do really like her, your ears gave it away, it's so red." Ate Jess teased me while laughing. 

 

They laughed for a minute din siguro and hiyang-hiya lang ako pero nakitawa na din, I can't help it.

 

"Hay nako.. it's funny pa rin. Pero dalaga na ang baby Rina namin." Ate Stal said while combing my hair using her fingers.

 

"Winter's a good kid, RIna. I'm glad it's her." Ate Jess told me and I smiled a little. 

 

Trust me, ate. I'm also glad that it's her.

 

"What happened in college, ate?" I finally asked when we settled.

 

She took a deep breath before answering my question. 

 

"It was also a long story but i'll make it short na lang din." I nodded and she continued to talk.

 

"I met her when we're in 3rd year college. She's working in a cafe near our uni, part-timer. Taeyeon's a charmer, well syempre I was charmed by her. Napadalas yung pagpunta ko sa cafe then we became friends. I asked her bakit siya nagpapart-time, she told me that she doesn't want to depend on her dad because may iba pa siyang kapatid and wala na silang mom." 

 

A baby Cael flashed in my mind, I need to see her baby pictures talaga. 

 

"Eventually, she confessed to me. Taeyeon's a straightforward person unlike Seulgi na mahiyain. We became girlfriends but it's not an easy road, there were a lot of ups and downs. Time and attention was really an often issue sa amin, she has work, I have modelling gigs too." 

 

Right, she's pursuing modelling din pala that time ans she's studying fashion design. 

 

"Taeyeon is taking Engineering that time, so grabe talaga yung time management for the both of us. We're both pressured din but more on her side, I just realized it when we broke up. We're both the first-born so the expectations sa'min, higher than the roof kahit hindi sabihin ng parents." 

 

It must be hard for the both of them nga, grabe yung external factors to their relationship.

 

I can't handle that kind of sacrifice siguro? Or not yet pa, I still have to grow emotionally and mentally to handle that. 

 

I wonder if Cael still remembers ate. 

 

"Ate, have you met Cael before?" I curiously asked her.

 

"She lets you call her Cael?" Amused niyang tanong pabalik so I nodded. "She doesn't like to be called like that, family and close friends lang nila tumatawag sa kanya on that name. Interesting." 

 

"Ate, please.. just answer." I said because nahihiya nanaman ako, I'm probably getting red nanaman.

 

"Okay, kidding lang. We're actually close with each other, she calls me Ate Ca because bulol pa siya nun and she's having a hard time saying my whole name." She answered while smiling. 

 

I pictured it in my head nanaman, if she's cute right now, what more nung todller pa siya? Omg.

 

"Okay, continue na, ate." I told her. 

 

"Most of the time kasi we're at their house lang, they don't have someone naman sa kanila kaya dun na lang kami nagha-hangout or date minsan. That's why we grew close ni Winter... I miss that kid, super thoughtful niya, malambing and caring. They're like carbon copy ni Tae, as in." 

 

"Yes, oh my god! I thought nga nung nameet ko both of them for the first time, I thought kid niya talaga si Winter, swear!" Ate Stal exclaimed.

 

"Right, diba? Pero mas reserved lang si Winter compared sa ate niya. Is she still reserved, Rina?" Our eldest cousin asked me. 

 

"She is, ate. There are rumours nga na bad influence siya, masungit siya and other negative traits but it's because they judge too quickly and basec on appearance and vibes lang." I answered the question. 

 

"Bad influence? That kid? Takot nya lang sa ate nya." Ate chuckled, Ate Stal and I did the same. 

 

"So ayun, we had to end our relationship because she needed to go sa South Korea, she was dicovered as a producer and I needed to go sa Paris for my studies and modelling. We talked and it was a mutual decision rin, hindi na kasi talaga namin kakayanin kung LDR pa. We barely had time when we're together, what more if we're on tdifferent parts of the world diba." She added. 

 

After that none of us talked. It's like we're thinking about them, what they've been through and just all thoughts that you can think about when you hear the story. 

 

"Ask her din, RIna." Ate Stal was the first one to speak.

 

I confusedly looked at her and after a minute I got what she said.  

 

"Do you still love her, ate?" I asked. 

 

"I do.. but in a platonic way. We have a lot memories eh, I won't trade it for anything. Those were really good memories and just like Stal said, I'm just happy on what we both have right now because I knew that we both deserve it." She said with a contented smile. 

 

 

******

 

 

After the talk with the two, I went to one of our guest rooms where I'm staying. 

 

I checked the time and it's 11:05 already. 

 

3 messages. 1 missed call.

 

Oh no, I quickly typed a reply to her messages. 

 

Message

grumpy cael 

To grumpy cael: i'm sorry, i'm talking with my cousins kanina and iniwan ko magcharge yung phone :<

From grumpy cael: oks lang, busy ka pa ba?

To grumpy cael: no na, you can call na

From grumpy cael: sure? baka magbobonding pa kayo ha, pwede namang bukas na lang

To grumpy cael: no, it's really fine na if you call

 

I didn't get a chance to exit the message app when her name flashed on my phone screen. 

 

| grumpy cael is calling | 

 

"Hi boss!" She widely grinned. 

 

I cant help but to smile also, para talaga siyang puppy, a maltese to be exact. 

 

"I told you to stop calling me names like that." I acted like I'm mad at her. 

 

"Bakit? Bagay naman ah." She playfully answered. 

 

"Where are you? Gising na si Thea?" I asked her to change the topic. 

 

She's wiggling her eyebrows kasi, kinikilig ako, okay? Sobrang charming niya pag ginagawa nya yung ganung gesture. 

 

"Yup, gising na. Naglilikot na sya sa baba, nasa kwarto ako ngayon kasi nagpapanic na sila dun." Then she laughed. 

 

"Silly! Syempre they're excited." 

 

"Oo nga, pero sa New year, hindi sa birthday ko, psh. Parang di pamilya eh."

 

I can't contain it anymore so tumawa na ako, she got it from her friends for sure, lalo na kay Ryujin.

 

We just talked about what we did the whole day, kung ano yung mga nangyari around our families, yung preparation for New Year and her birthday salubong na rin. 

 

She asked me na mauna magkwento then after na daw yung chika niya, I laughed ulit. Para aksi kaming magkumare lang. 

 

I told her about what we did to prepare, the games we played kasama yung cousins ko and yung talk ko with our two ates. 

 

I didn't told her about their relationship kay Ate Seulgi and her sister, I'll tell her kapag nasa Tagaytay na kami para ayun yung surprise. 

 

I'm just visualizing her reaction if I told her about my cousins' relationship to her loved ones pero natatawa na agad ako. For sure she'll have more animated reaction than me. 

 

"Ops! Ops! Bakit tumatawa ka dyan? May dumi ako sa mukha 'no?" She eyed me suspiciously pero she's still playful.

 

"There's nothing kaya, I remembered something lang." I answered.  "How's your day?" I asked her. 

 

"Naging magulang ni Thea for today's video." She answered while exhaling loudly. 

 

"Oh? Akala ko ba you love kids?" I . 

 

"Oo nga, kaso di ako minsan makasabay sa energy nila eh. Dapat si Rj pala pinapunta ko, bagay na bagay sila midget Thea." She said kaya natawa nanaman ako.

 

She's effortlessly funny and she doesn't have any idea about it. She's blurting out things casually like it's the most normal thing to say and it's cute, really.

 

Anything ata na gawin niya is cute for me. I just adore her more and more each day. 

 

"Tata! Abas na tayo!" I heard a little voice shout sa background, that must be Thea.

 

"Wait lang midget, say hi muna kay Tata Rina, lika dito." She motioned the little girl to come sa kanya. 

 

A little girl appeared in the screen and I can't help but to gush about her, sobrang cute! 

 

She's sporting a ponytail braid and wearing a pastel blue shirt with jumper shorts. 

 

"Hi tata- hala pwetty!" She exclaimed when she saw me and I chuckled. Pati reactions niya cute rin, it's in their genes ata. 

 

"Sobrang ganda, no?" Cael asked her while staring at me. 

 

"Yes, tata! Super, duper, malaki ganito!" The kid gestured a big circle using all of her arms.

 

I turned my attention to Thea and told her she's very pretty too. 

 

I can't stare at Cael's eyes, they're too dangerous for me, nakakalunod. 

 

 

We just talked and listened to Thea's stories until nagyaya ito lumabas na sa kwarto. When I checked the time it's 10 minutes left na lang before Cael's birthday. Our cousins called me na din so I went down na, hindi pa ako lumabas sa patio, I stayed leaning lang sa doorway watching our families and relatives. 

 

We're still on call ni Cael, she's still with THea but I'm hearing more voices sa background sound niya. When she said earlier na nagpapanic yung families nila, she's not joking. They're a little loud din pala, siguro they've been drinking na rin kasi kanina pa, Cael told me. 

 

Her screen moved, I heard rumbling of things then I saw her away from the screen, she's changing Thea's inner shirt. There's a stain kasi, I don't know where it came from. After that she put the jumper shorts back on the kid then she walk towards her phone. 

 

"Sabi sayo, ako talaga yung magulang ni Thea eh." She proudly said. 

 

"You're not going out pa?" I asked her but she just shrugged.

 

"Ayoko, dito muna ako sayo." 

 

Winter Cael naman.. you and you're choice of words. 

 

"Ikaw? Di ka pa lalabas?" She asked. 

 

"I still want to talk to you, it's your birthday na rin." I told her.

 

"U-uy may ilang minutes pa." She stuttered and I mentally laughed, I would never shut up about how her reactions are so cute. 

 

It's only seconds until her birthday and we're still on call. I'll greet her lang talaga then we agreed to talk tomorrow na lang. Ayaw nya pa nga nung una, she doesn't want to spend the countdown with me daw kasi kasama ko yung families and relatives, baka daw maka-abala pa siya. I assured her naman na it's okay and after a few arguments, I convinced her earlier. 

 

10..

 

9..

 

"Cael, halika dito!" I heard someone shouts at her background.

 

8..

 

7..

 

6..

 

5..

 

I looked at her but she's not looking at her phone. 

 

You're my greatest plot twist for this year, Winter Cael. 

 

4..

 

3..

 

2..

 

I looked back at my phone and found her staring already. I smiled at her. 

 

1.. 

 

"Happy Birthday, Cael." I mouthed at the phone. 

 

She smiled back before mouthing "Happy New Year, Rina."

 

We remained staring at each other but the background noise on her side kept getting louder. 

 

"Gotta go, see you bukas, Rina." I barely understand it but that's what I got. 

 

I waved at the screen and ended our call. 

 

I'm grateful to start my year with you, Cael. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

--

hello! kindly read the author's note. thank you for waiting patiently! :))