Wheein's PoV

I remembered how nervous I was when I asked her to come with me to the beach. It wasn't a date but I was hoping I could spend time with her beyond the walls of my studio. I fidgeted a lot. I was prolonging my agony. And I was a huge ball of nerves back then.

I mean who wouldn't. She wouldn't stop asking questions instead of just saying yes or no. But when she put down her spoon and fork, that's when I heard loud sirens in my head signalling me to abort the mission. I was sweating. My leg under the table couldn't stop shaking. I think all my muscles have gone haywire at that time. It was just pure torture.

But she agreed. It was like meeting Santa Claus back when I believed how a big guy in a red costume would drop by my house on Christmas night just to bring us gifts.

Who would do such a thing just to give away free gifts? No one.

But it gives us hope. It makes us happy. It makes us want to be nice for the rest of our lives. It makes us look forward to seeing him. And that's exactly what I felt like when she agreed to come with me. It was exhilarating. 

The beach brought out something in Yong and it was like seeing her for the first time. She was calm. She was content. Her smiles were wider, her eyes shined brighter and her laughs were louder and more genuine.

It stirred something in me. It brought warmth inside me. And I couldn't help but think that I felt so privileged to be able to witness her like this. It made me want to do anything for her just so I could witness this Yong again. It made me want to protect her, to take care of her and to just simply be with her.

It made me fall in love with you. And I have never stopped loving you. Even now.

Was I not expressing it enough? Was I not able to love her enough that she decided to leave? To break up with me?

Was I not good enough for you Yong?

This hurts so much. She's just right beside me now and I couldn't even hold her like I used to. She felt so far away even if she's just standing there beside me.

What happened, Yong? What happened to us? 

"Is it true?" she asked before I could even torture myself from my own thoughts. Before I could let a lone tear escape my eye.

I looked at her staring at the painting. But more like staring at nowhere, eyes unfocused, and her mind to a distant memory.

"What is true?" I closed my eyes to sigh and looked back at the painting.

"What you meant by the painting" she said while tipping her head to the painting, eyeing it now.

"What do you mean?" 

"This. You painted me on the beach when we were in Busan, right?" she said, pointing at the painting.

I scoffed silently.

Brave of you to assume that's you. I mean, damn it. Yeah, it is you! Everything about this is because of you.

"Yeah" I answered timidly. 

"I had an anxiety attack that day"

"Yes, I remembered" 

I wanted to panic with her but I don't think it would've solved our situation that time. So I tried to be calm instead. Tried. 

My tongue slipped back then. I was on the verge of panicking and I was so nervous that my heart was beating so fast, it could jump out of my chest. But competing with her against who panicked the most wasn't really the best idea that time. I was desperate and I do not know what to do so I did the only thing I thought. I kissed her worries away and called her affectionately.

I wasn't sure if she noticed it but she never mentioned it so I mentally patted myself on the back just to get rid of my embarrassment.

Way to go, me. Yey! 

"I don't mean to assume but was it the day you... You know?" she asked, looking at me now.

"The day I what?" I asked, looking at her in confusion.

"Uhmm..." she stuttered, a hand holding the back of her neck. opening and closing a lot of times, trying to piece out what she wanted to ask me.

I think I know what she wanted to ask but I don't want to assume nor that I wanted to mention it first between the two of us.

I don't think you're brave enough to say it Yong. I dare you to say it.

"What is it?" I asked, pushing her to spill it already.

"I uhh... No, never mind. I forgot what to say. I'm sorry" she mumbled. Her hand caressed her hair then her arms went around to hug herself.

You couldn't, huh.

I just nodded, still looking at her.

Her shoulders went down after she released a heavy breath. Her head casted downwards, eyeing the floor while she gently kicked it. She looked like a lost and lonely child waiting at the gate of her school, hoping that whoever would pick her up would do it right away. She looked vulnerable and it made me want to go to her and wrapped my arms around her, telling her that everything's okay. That I'm here and she's not going to be lonely anymore. But I didn't. I was just looking at her, standing in front of her, my hands on my side with my fists clenched tightly.

I didn't because I can't. I can't because between the two of us, I was that lonely child waiting for her to come back. Hoping that everything was a joke. That I would wake up from a prank set up on me. I was the one left behind and she was the one who left me. And I can't do anything about it so I just closed my eyes, stopping myself from crying in front of her. I couldn't count the number of times I did this for tonight. I just wanted to go home now.

"Do we really have to finish everything? Do we really have to do this, Yong?" I asked her, still breathing heavily. 

"What do you mean, Whee?" she asked worriedly.

"We can't ignore the fact that we were in a relationship for years, Yong. I can't ignore the fact that you broke up with me, left me and then showed up out of nowhere as if nothing happened between the two of us. What do you want from me, Yong?" I asked her, unable to stop myself anymore. 

"Wheein…"

"I don't even understand why you broke up with me. Did you even really love me? Was I not enough for you?" I asked while sobbing a