It was just two days before the wedding and my mother was running around, ripping her hair in every direction she could. I had already gotten yelled at this morning for eating a granola bar so I made a mad dash for the door. I had to go to school anyway. On my drive there it had finally sunk in that I was about to get married and that my life as I was used to might not be the same. Not even a chance to be able to live by myself after I graduated. I shook my head at the thought and knew that my life wasn’t going to become worse than it was. I just hoped it would get better. The drive to wasn’t as eventful, probably because I wasn’t even paying attention to what I was doing and was on autopilot. Classes seemed to have blurred by too and I couldn’t force myself to focus half of the time. As I was walking out of the building after my last class, I felt a vibration in my pocket and pulled out my phone to see my brother calling me.

“Hello?” I got to my car and opened the passenger side to throw my backpack in there. 

“Hey Hana, if you're done with school, come over to my place. I already called mom and told her so just come over.” He hung up the phone and I blinked at the conversation before placing the phone back in my pocket. I shook my head and walked to the drivers side to get in and started the car. I have the horrible habit of going into autopilot when I drive and don’t even bother to check for surrounding trouble so I had to blast music to keep me focused….well as focused as I can be. I got to their house at the same time their door opened and the family of four stepped out. Sora waved me over and the kids ran to my car. I got out and walked towards them, quickly grabbing the twins so they wouldn’t run into the streets, and walked towards Sora. 

“Hey guys, whats up?” I placed the twins down and went to hug Sora and hug my brother. 

“Oh nothing much, just some last minute shopping before the wedding. There is one more crucial thing we need to get.” I raised my eyebrow but the twins dragged me to the car, the parents following. I helped the kids into the back of Taeyong’s car before settling in myself and turned towards the duo in the front.

“What else did we need?” Sora turned around in her seat and smiled.

“The wedding bands. Mother called us this morning and asked us to go get it, so we thought we would make it a family trip.” I nodded and turned towards the twins.

“You guys want to help me pick a ring.” They both nodded enthusiastically and I laughed. At that moment though, my stomach decided to grumble and I crossed my arms over my abdomen, embarrassed. 

“Do you want to get something to eat?” Taeyong asked and I saw him getting into the right lane.

“No, I’m fine. I’m not really hungry.” I say but we had turned into a McDonalds area. I sighed and leaned back. 

“Hana what do you want?” Taeyong looked at me through the rearview mirror but I just shook my head. He frowned but heaved a sigh and opened the window. Sora then turned around in her seat and looked at me and smiled.

“Why do you not want to eat? You’re obviously hungry.” I looked down at my stomach and I could feel my eyes watering at the memory of what happened at the dress shop. “Hana?” I bit my lip and tried to hide my face with my hair. 

“I just didn’t want to gain weight before the big day you know?” Ok good. You didn’t stutter. I tried to choke down the rock that was forming in my throat so I could talk. “I don’t want to not be able to fit into the dress. The dress was already loose around my waist. I wanted to keep it that way.” So mom wouldn’t get mad. It was quiet in the car for a few minutes, the only sound coming from the kids, who were talking to each other. 

“When I called mom earlier today, she told me about what happened at the shop....Why didn’t you tell us?” Taeyong asked quietly. 

“What was I supposed to say Taeyong? This isn’t the first time I’m hearing something like this. Honestly I should be used to this.”

“But your tears tell us a different story.” I then felt the cold wet drop sliding down my cheek and quickly went to go brush it away. I felt a hand on my arm and I peeked through my hair to see Sora stare at me with worry, her brows furrowed. “Listen, I went ahead and called the seamstress to stitch the sides of the dress.” My head snapped up in shock before dread filled me. 

“No no. If you do that mom will get angry. She will be upset with me.” I could feel the panic start to rise and Sora gripped my arm firmly. 

“She won’t. Taeyong made sure of that this morning.” Sora nodded her head towards my brother, who let out a scoff. 

“I told her you will also be staying with us till the wedding day. She can pitch a fit and get angry all she wants, I’m not letting you go back to that house before your wedding. I told them we would all meet at the church on Saturday.” Taeyong handed Sora a bag, which she took and placed it on her lap before looking at me again. 

“I’m glad you weren’t there to see the conversation. I don’t think I have ever seen your brother this mad.” She squeezed my hand before letting it go and turned to the bag on her lap.

“Aunty! You’re going to be staying with us! We’re going to have a sleepover! I’m so happy!” Jeno bounced around in his seat while Jaemin clapped like no tomorrow. They soon got distracted by two boxes handed to them. They opened it to find chicken nuggets and I quickly grabbed a hold of the boxes before it could fall. Once they got their hold, Jeno pushed my arm away, whining and I laughed before letting go. A sandwich was then handed to me and I took it. I didn’t open it however, keeping my eyes on the kids.

“They can eat by themselves, don’t worry.” Sora winked at me and the kids puffed out their chests. 

“Yeah we’re big boys!” Jaemin yelled and I laughed at the dynamic duo. I looked at the sandwich and opened it slowly, not feeling the hunger, although my stomach said a different story. I nibbled on it, taking small bites from time to time. I was halfway done when we reached a small store that had only one other car parked in the front. The doors opened, only to show my sister step out of the passenger seat and wave at us. I quickly folded up my sandwich and waited for the car to park before getting myself out of the car. I helped the kids get out and they both rushed to my sister, who bent down and scooped both of them into her arms. Doyoung showed up next to her and grabbed Jeno, holding him while my sister took Jaemin and held him. The rest of us walked towards them, me in the back trying to look decent. 

“You look fine. Plus, it’s your sister.” I felt a tug on my hair and glanced up to see Sora push a few strands of hair away from my face. 

“I know, I was just making sure. Thank you.” I whispered and she smiled before taking my hand and placing it on the crook of her elbow. 

“Fancy meeting you all here.” My sister jabbed and Sora giggled while Taeyong rolled his eyes. Doyoung patted my head and nodded at the door as a silent let’s go in. We all walked in and I was hit by a sudden gust of cold air causing me to shudder.The entrance was made from marble, a small fountain in the middle where water was flowing. Sora pulled me closer and smiled as a person came out from a corner. 

“You must be the Lee’s and the Kim’s. Welcome to our store.” The guy bowed to us before waving his hand back to gesture us in. We walked further in and I was blinded by the amount of lighting there was in the room. I blinked a few times before looking around, blown away by the amount of rings that were in this small store. “How may we be of assistance?” I heard a voice from behind us and it was the same person that brought us in. Taeyong cleared his throat and stepped forward.

“We’re looking for a ring for her fiance. They are getting married in two days' time.” The clerk nodded before looking at each one of us.

“Who..?” Taeyong shook his head and held up his hand. 

“He isn’t here with us but his ring finger is the same size as my index finger.” The clerk nodded before motioning Taeyong over to a corner. Sora pulled me away and started pointing out different rings that caught her attention. 

“Is there any style you particularly like?” I heard Anna from behind me and I turned to see her more closely now. Her hair was in a messy bun and she was wearing jeans and a shirt and a cardigan. Her eyes looked red and there were smudges on the bottom of her eyes. 

“What happened to you?” I asked with worry.

“Mom called.” she replied before clearing and pointed to a ring. “How about that one?” I looked towards the one she pointed too and saw a simple gold band with a swirl design on top. I shook my head and looked at the whole shelf.

“I don’t like gold.” I heard a small right before I was dragged to another corner. We were now standing in front of an area just filled with silver. I frowned at the amount of rings there were to choose from and scratched my head at the confusion. From the corner of my eye I saw tiny hands touch the glass around my waist. I looked down to see the kids staring at something, so I bent down to see what they were looking at. 

“Aunty, what about that one?” The ring they pointed to was a thick silver band with a black criss-cross design in the middle. I actually like this one. I stood up straight and looked around for a salesperson when one stepped in front of me. 

“Is there anything to your liking ma’am?” I nodded and bent down again towards the ring I saw and pointed at it. 

“This ring, with the black, may I see it please.” The lady grabbed the shelf the ring was sitting on and placed the whole shelf in front of me. She plucked the ring I was pointing towards and handed it towards me gingerly. I took the ring and looked at it closely before looking behind me for my sisters to come see. Doyoung saw me first and walked towards me.

“The girls are with the boys, trying to find bracelets for them. Did you find anything?” I held out the ring and he took it, turning it around in his hand and frowned before turning towards the sales lady. 

“How much for this?” He handed the ring back and the lady placed it back on the shelf. 

“I can go check for you sir.” Doyoung nodded and turned around at the same time Taeyong showed up. He saw us and walked over to where we were standing. 

“She liked this one.” Doyoung pointed out the ring and I looked at Taeyong, who was eying the jewelry before looking at me. 

“Are you sure?” I looked back at the ring before looking back at him. 

“I don’t know. Should I pick another one?” He shook his head before leaning on the glass pane and looked at me. 

“It’s your choice. Do you like this ring?” I looked at all of the other rings and none of the others caught my eye like that one did. I shook my head and looked at him. 

“This is a nice ring.” He nodded and motioned for the sales clerk that was standing nearby. 

“We will take this ring. We need something inscribed in it too. Can you do it today?” The clerk nodded and grabbed the ring Taeyong was pointing too.

“Please come with me.” Taeyong walked away again and I turned towards Doyoung. 

“That is a nice ring right?” Doyoung nodded before turning around. 

“I liked it. It is up to you though.” I scratched the back of my neck and turned around away from all of the rings. 

“I didn’t like the other rings.” He nodded and we just stood there in silence. Soon I heard a sigh and I turned to look at Doyoung, who was on his phone. “Is everything ok?” He nodded and put his phone away before looking at me.

“Your parents called us earlier today. Your mom seemed pretty upset with some things that your brother had said to her apparently. Your sister looked ready to break our vases too.” I looked down feeling guilty and felt the rock forming in my throat again. 

“I’m sorry. I’m really sorry. I didn’t mean for this to happen.” I felt a hand on my head and and heard another sigh. 

“Why are you apologizing? You’re not the one that should be apologizing. We’re just sorry we weren't there to be there for you. Usually, you never let stuff like that bother you before. Why are you so upset by it now?” I shook my head not understanding it either. 

“I’m not sure. I mean, I have been hearing the same thing for so many years, but recently it just seems to sting more now. Like every tiny thing they say just sends me to tears and I feel weak and helpless. And that just makes me more angry because I have other things I should be worried about but those comments just keep resurfacing. I’m stressed about school and having to finish because I want to stop being a bother to my parents. Now there’s this marriage going on. What if I’m not exactly what Johnny wanted in a wife? What changes do I have to make so I don’t become a bother to him too?” He didn’t say anything but started to pat my head.

“Is that why you haven't called us or come over to hang out anymore? Because you think you’re bothering us?” I nodded my head and I heard him sigh again. “I don’t have any younger siblings Hana and the few cousins I have are all older than me. Do you know how excited I was to learn that my wife to be had a little sister? I had always wanted to be an older brother and I especially wanted to be someone you can rely on. I may not be your brother by blood but I always considered you as my own little sister.” I shook my head and glanced up at him. 

“I always considered you as my brother.” He smiled and continued on. 

“I’m glad. That being said, we are all here for you. If you have a problem I want you to come to us. Any of us. I don’t want you to ever think that we would consider you as a burden. Just the other day Anna was telling me she missed having those Harry Potter marathons with you while binging on ramen. She always tells me stories of things she did with you and I can see she misses you a lot.” 

“I’m sorry.” He chuckled and looked towards Anna with a smile.

“You have nothing to apologize for. Just come visit once in a while ok?” He looked at me and I nodded my head but then he frowned. “Now, about that stress that you’re going through and feeling helpless constantly. I think that just means you have been strong for way too long and just need some relief.” I don’t know why, but something unlocked in me and I felt the tears start to spill out of my eyes. I soon felt arms around me and my head being pushed into a chest. “You’re not weak, do you understand?” I nodded my head but the tears wouldn’t stop. “You’re not a burden or helpless, got it” I nodded again and I heard him sigh.  I don’t know how long I cried for but I felt a hand start rubbing on my back. 

“Is she ok?” I heard my sister whisper and that gave me the sign to stop crying. 

“She’s fine. Just stressed about everything that is happening.” I tried to wipe all of the tears and kept my head down while Doyoung let me go. I saw a tissue being handed to me by someone and I took it to wipe the excess tears that my hands couldn’t wipe away. I slowly lifted my head and looked at Anna, who gave me a small smile and brushed my hair away from my face with her hands. 

“You ok?” I quickly nodded my head and tried to smile but I guess I failed because she laughed. She wrapped an arm around me and Doyoung bent down to my eye level.

“You are beautiful and strong. Don’t let anyone tell you any different, yeah?” I nodded my head and tried to give a smile. He smiled too and shook my hair, which caused my sister to let out a sound.

“Oh come on! I just fixed it!” I laughed and so did Doyoung. Taeyong came out of a room and was carrying a small bag. He stopped short when he saw me and raised his eyebrows toward Doyoung and Anna, who shook their heads. 

“Let’s go guys. We’re having dinner at my place. Where’s Sora?” He turned around to see Sora sitting on the waterfall ledge with a small smile, who was watching the kids. The kids seemed to be dipping their fingers into the fountain and watched the water drip from their fingers and yell out a number to each other. We all started to walk towards her and she must have noticed because she turned towards us and smiled while standing up. She seemed to have said something to the kids because they turned around and ran towards us, jumping around until Doyoung and Taeyong grabbed them. Taeyong handed the bag to Anna and turned towards Doyoung, both of them walking away while talking about something. 

“Do you want to see the final product?” I nodded and Anna pulled out the box, Sora and I stopped right next to her, curious. She opened the box and the ring was there, there was more of a sparkle towards it though but there was something else added to it inside the ring. 

“What’s that?” I asked while slowly pulling the ring out and saw “Hana” inscribed inside it. “Oh.” Sora laughed and took the ring from my hands.

“They have nice workmanship. The writing looks pretty for four letters. Look, there’s leaves next to it too.” She pointed the ring in my direction and there were leaves, like my engagement ring, next to my name. I took the ring back and inspected it again, making sure that this ring is what I wanted. I handed the ring back to Anna after a few seconds and she placed it back in the box, and then placed it back in the bag. She then clasped my right hand while Sora wrapped her right around my left and we walked towards the guys outside. 

“What do you feel like eating? I can cook or we can buy from outside to take home. Whatever you want to do.” There wasn’t anything in particular I wanted to eat but I did want to do something. 

“Can we all cook together? I can bake a cake!” Anna nodded next to me as we reached the car. 

“I haven't had one of your cakes in ages! Let’s do that. Sora, what do you think?” Sora nodded while smiling big.

“Let’s do it! That sounds fun!” I smiled really big too, really excited to get home. 

“What sounds fun?” Taeyong asked from the back of the car waiting for the kids to buckle themselves in and Doyoung walked towards us.

“We’re going to have a little cooking party. And Hana wants to bake for us!” 

“Hana bakes?” Doyoung asked and Taeyong’s eyes went wide. 

“You’ve never had her cakes before? Wait, now that I think about it, you haven't either have you?” He looked towards Sora, who shook her head.

“I am totally not being biased but Hana makes the best cakes!” Anna was slightly jumping and I was getting excited about being able to bake after so long. Because mother says someone in our position should never step foot into the kitchen unless it is too order the chef. I rolled my eyes at the notion but smiled at all of my siblings. We all hurried to our cars and sped down the highway to get to Taeyong and Sora’s house quickly. The kids were napping and Taeyong and Sora were talking quietly with each other. I wonder how Johnny is doing. I pulled my phone and tried to figure out what I should text him and just figured a simple “hi” would be fine. I pulled his name up and sent the message, feeling myself smile but the smile left. What if I’m really not what he wants as a wife? I looked at my brother and his wife and tried to figure out how they make it work. I was about to ask but I heard a sniff from beside me. I looked to see Jeno had his eyes scrunched up and he started whimpering. I frowned and grabbed one of his hands, patting his leg with my other hand. That seemed to have done the trick because he calmed down and smacked his lips, falling asleep again. I laughed slightly and took my arms back. Well one of my hands, he was holding my other hand. I looked out the window and figured that I would figure out my dilemma when the time comes. I closed my eyes and felt all sounds drift away. 

“Hana, we’re home.” I felt a hand on my shoulder and opened my eyes to see Taeyong look at me with worry. “Are you ok?” I nodded my head and quickly got up but realized Jeno was still holding my hand. I unbuckled him and took him into my arms before scooching out of the car. Taeyong closed the door behind me and we walked up to the front door, which was open because of Sora. I looked at Taeyong, who gestured for me to follow him. We walked into a room and I saw Sora placing Jaemin in one of the beds. Taeyong turned towards me and I gave him Jeno before leaving the room. Just in time I heard the doorbell ring and I walked towards it to open it and saw it was Anna and Doyoung. In their hands were bags filled with stuff and I opened the door wider for them to walk in. Taeyong and Sora walked out to see Doyoung taking all of the stuff out, which happened to be groceries, and Anna placed them on the counter in different areas. Sora quickly walked in and handed Anna and me aprons before putting hers on too. Taeyong and Doyoung left the room and we started getting our things ready for whatever we were cooking. The guys soon walked in wearing sweatpants and t-shirts, and looked around the kitchen.

“What can we help with?” Doyoung asked, walking around us three, who were walking around the kitchen without bumping into each other. The kitchen was a big spacious area where the stove, oven and island was in one area. The other side was the fridge and sink with an island too. Since there was nothing in the middle, we were all zig zagging between each other with lots of space to avoid collision. 

“Taeyong can you cut these onions for me please?” Sora said, not glancing up from the sink where she was washing the vegetables and Taeyong sniffed.

“You just love to see me cry don’t you?” Sora laughed but handed him a few onions in a small plastic pot, and kissed him on the cheek. 

“Have fun.” She said and I laughed. I was staring at the counter full of ingredients and started calmly, staying out of the others' ways, knowing they won’t let me help. I cut myself by accident once and I lose all knife priveledges. I huffed and cracked three eggs into a silver pot and added some flour and started mixing. 

“Doyoung I need your help in mixing this while I cut a few other things.” From the corner of my eye I saw Doyoung glide by Anna’s side and took the spoon in her hand mid mix and continued mixing while smiling at her. He kissed her cheek and she smiled at him before looking at the vegetables she had to finish cutting. I smiled at the scenery and turned back to my cake batter. I moved slowly, away from the other and did my things. I then went to melt some chocolate in the pan and stayed away from the other dishes so I wouldn’t hit it by accident. I could feel the others look at me while I stood by the stoves and turned to glare at them, which made them turn away.I’m not going to drop it...I hope. Once the chocolate was melted and mixed I continued on with my baking. From the mixing and adding, it finally came time to pour it into a pan. I walked towards the pantry and looked inside to see the baking pans on the top. Of course. Once again I’m reminded how short I am. 

“What do you need?” I looked behind me to see Anna stare at the pantry and then look at me. I pointed to the top shelf and gave her a blank look. 

“A pan.” She laughed and turned around.

“Doyoung?” He looked at her from the stove and walked over to us. “She needs the pan.” She pointed up and he looked only to start laughing. He got me the pan and I took it back to my baking area. “Should we tell Johnny to place all of your pans on the top shelf in your new house?” I turned towards Anna in disbelief. 

“Why do you want to torture me?!” They laughed and I turned around pouting. I quickly buttered the pan and poured the cake batter in. Avoiding people, I placed the pan in the oven and turned around to clean my area. As soon as I finished cleaning the area, the food was ready and we all sat down to eat. The kids woke up when we finished and they were eating when the timer on the oven went off. I quickly went to the oven and pulled out my cake. I waited for the cake to cool before I frosted the cake and the other were planning on watching a movie. We soon decided on a movie about dragons and training them. As they were getting it ready, I frosted the cake and served it to everyone. Everyone seemed to have loved it, as they kept taking more slices. Soon enough half-way through the movie the cake was finished and everyone was laying around on the floor and the couches, slightly dozing off. I glanced around and was glad that Taeyong wanted me to stay here for the next few days. I honestly am lucky to have such a family.