POHANG

Sleep on it? More like think about it all night that it completely steals your sleep away.

Ji Hyo can’t sleep a wink that night. She keeps visiting the memories she has buried deep inside her heart. She can’t believe what he said. Even though she knows that he will never push her, but one thing is clear, he wants her back and he is going to do what it takes.

Ji Hyo just can’t find herself running back into his arms, even though Jong Kook is just an ugly part of Jin Young’s backstabbing plan. She just can’t. The memories will haunt her, and she won’t be able to live with them. She’s afraid because it didn’t take long to break the relationship they built over for almost 7 years. What if anything like this happens again? Now that they have their kids involved.

Will she be able to get past the trauma? Probably. But not now. She’s not ready. Her mind keeps asking the biggest question, whether or not she is ready to put her heart at stake.

She keeps tossing and turning. Her mind keeps running no matter how many times she has tried to close her eyes. Lifting herself up to see the alarm clock beside her bed, she sees it’s 5.37 am, and she thinks she will go crazy if she keeps tossing on her bed. Thankfully I Seul is still sleeping peacefully.

She carefully untangles herself from I Seul, before creating a heap of pillows and blanket on either side so he won’t roll over like he usually does. She changes into her jogging attire because she has decided to go jogging, to sort of clear her head. Running and riding bicycles usually help clear her head. She takes her phone, her earphones, and a water bottle, and starts hitting the road.

It’s still early in the morning. The sun is just about to rise and the chilly breeze that hit her face is somehow calming her down. The view looks amazing.

She keeps running on the footpath parallel to the beach, before taking a real quick break and sitting on the bench on the side. Energetic from Wanna One accompany her break. She is enjoying the sudden exercise she gets to do instead of only running around in her house, getting the chores done, or running behind I Seul to get him to finish his food.

“Annyeong.” She hears someone say after pulling her earphones out. She is so into the song that she doesn’t see a man standing there.

“God! You scared the crap out of me!” Ji Hyo exclaims, placing her hand on her beating heart.

Dong Wook laughs hard at her outburst. “Jinjja, that was hilarious.”

“Glad that it amuses you.” Ji Hyo answers sarcastically.

“How come you decided to run today?” Dong Wook asks, placing himself beside her.

Ji Hyo shrugs her shoulders. “I had a lot to think about and running bits of help.”

Dong Wook gives a warm smile. “You look too worked up, though. What is going on in that pretty little head of yours?”

“A lot actually.” Ji Hyo sighs.

“Don’t think too much. Overthinking is not good.”

“You don’t even know what I’m thinking!” Ji Hyo defends herself. She looks upset.

Dong Wook raises his hands in surrender. “I don’t, but whatever it might be, overthinking is never good.”

Ji Hyo doesn’t say anything. They both sit quietly for a few minutes.

“Have I told you the reason why I left my husband? What he did that’s so unforgivable that I had to leave?” Ji Hyo starts opening a conversation.

Dong Wook shakes his head. “No, actually.”

“I haven’t?” Ji Hyo gasps. “He cheated on me.” She continues quickly.

“With that drunk woman?” He remembers the drunk woman that woke up frantically yesterday.

Ji Hyo chuckles. “Yes, with that woman. We used to be best friends until I found them cheating on me one morning. I saw them under a blanket with my own eyes. But apparently, after four years, that woman told me that they didn’t sleep together. He was drunk and she didn’t correct us when he and I thought they had slept together.” Ji Hyo breathes out.

Dong Wook frowns.

“I’m sorry. I just had to get that out of my system loud and clear.” Ji Hyo blurs.

Dong Wook an eyebrow but encourages her to continue when he realizes that she’s not done.

“That woman also said that what happened four years ago was my fault. If I didn’t hastily run out of there without confronting him, maybe my family would still be complete. Maybe my babies would not have to grow up with only one parent.” Ji Hyo says, running a hand through her hair.

“Seong Im-ah, you can’t think like that. You-”

“I’m trying, Dong Wook-ah. I am really trying not to think like that, and yet I can’t help it. I could have been in Ha Neul’s life, watched her grow up into the beautiful little lady that she is. Jong Kook Oppa could have got a chance to be in all of I Seul’s first moments.” Ji Hyo whispers, exasperatedly.

“Stop, stop.” Dong Wook averts her. “Stop right there, Seong Im-ah. What happened has happened, and yes you can think about all the what if’s and the possibilities, but they all happened and there’s nothing you can do now. All that matters is your present and your future. You are now a part of your daughter’s life and so is Jong Kook-ssi in I Seul’s life. Think about those and cherish them.” Dong Wook takes her hand into his and gives it a little squeeze.

Ji Hyo takes a deep breath. “You’re right. I’ve been thinking too much.” Then she stands up. “I’ve got to continue running. Are you coming?”

Dong Wook also stands up and gives her a smile. “Right behind you.”

Ji Hyo is mentally preparing herself to stand by on what she has decided. She wants her children, both of them. And she also wants Jong Kook. She has been overthinking, and as always, Dong Wook can always open her eyes in a way they were closed. And she will be forever grateful for him.

It’s time to take a deep breath and go get what she wants. She is ready to put her heart at stake because no matter what they have been through, she still does love him. They have been through so much and it’s not easy for her to pretend like s