—September 2018—

After Busan, Chang-wook felt more like himself. It was hard to put his finger on exactly what was different. It wasn't just his date with Ji-hyun, which had made clear, to him at least, that he really did like her, even with all of the breaks and missed moments, he liked her more than anyone else he had ever met. There was also the musical. When he stood on stage during rehearsals and or during a performance he enjoyed himself for the first time since enlisting. It made him feel guilty that unlike every other recruit he was getting to do something he loved while also serving his country.

Even with rehearsals, he was able to make time to watch Ji-hyun’s new drama. In the evening, the soldiers would gather around the busted television set and watch. Pretty soon “One Hundred Days My Prince” was the most popular drama amongst the soldiers in part because they were able to ask Ji Chang-wook all about Nam Ji-hyun. They loved her bubbly personality, her smile, the way she always seemed to be so relaxed around everyone.

‘What was she like to work with?’

‘Is she as beautiful in person?’

‘You kissed her…’

All the questions started to drive him mad. Soon all he gave were stock answers. ‘She was amazing, she is beautiful, she… she is an actress so her kisses are part of acting.’ He was grateful that he didn’t for one minute have to think that her kisses were acting. There was nothing more real in the world than kissing Ji-hyun. The questions began to change as the drama went on.

‘What was her favourite food?’

‘What was her ideal type?’

‘When she came to visit could he introduce her…’

Their boyish crushes became a burden especially when they learnt that he had received a letter from her. It was a simple one updating him on her various schedules. Nothing hinted at any closer relationship so he didn’t feel too bad about showing it to them. 

‘She has pretty handwriting.’

‘I hope she visits.’

‘Oh! I hadn’t realised. We are at the same school.’

Chang-wook looked up at the soldier. He knew that many of the men were still at university, going back next year to complete their degrees, but he had never thought that one of her classmates might be living in his barracks. He contemplated his position again. With all the recent events going on he had forgotten what his life had been like before her. There was bike ride in May but that memory had faded so that the one with her could take its place. How were the guys doing? Would he want to hang out with them as much when he got back? They were always fun and it was good to go out and party with them. Chang-wook was naturally shy so being around people who were as outgoing and energetic as they were helped him meet new people. There were times when he felt out of step with them. Some nights would get too wild and Chang-wook would leave early to go back to his Eomma. That was another difference. They about living with his Eomma saying that he would never be able to date if he didn’t live on his own. That didn’t bother him so much. Anyone he wanted to date would have to know that his Eomma would always be at the centre of his life. Ji-hyun would understand that. She and her eomma were very close. They had worked together for years. Yes, she would be completely comfortable having dates at the house with his Eomma cooking them a meal. 

When he wasn’t having to fend off questions about Ji-hyun, Chang-wook was at the theatre rehearsing or performing. The musical was getting attention from the press and opening night was full of excited spectators. And every night after the show he would make his way past fans screaming his name. It was on the final night as he walked past fans screaming…

‘Ji Chang-wook-sshi!’

‘WOOOKIEEEE!!!!’

‘CHANG-WOOOOOK OOPPPPAAAA!!!’

…that he realised what that despite how crazy it was this was his life and he loved it. He loved performing in front of an audience and knowing that his fans were happy with it. An actor was who he was not just who he had become. That night on the way back to base he sent Ji-hyun a message on his phone. 

‘I wish you could have seen the show. We had a great audience.’

‘Oppa! I am so glad. I am going to the Opera! I will let you know what I think. Have you been? Stay healthy! Hwaiting!’

He looked down at his phone. She had not made it to the show, even though it was in Seoul, but she was going to the Opera. 

‘Aish,’ He muttered and shoved his phone into his bag ‘I just…’

‘What is with you? It was a great performance.’ Kang Ha-neul asked turning around in his seat.

‘Nothing. Just tired. You know the feeling. After it all finishes…’

‘Yeah. The let down. But to be honest. I’m glad… going back and forth was starting to get hard.’

‘Hahahaha… What kind of hardships have you had doing this musical?’ their fellow, non-celebrity, castmate asked.

‘Same as you! The beds at the base are more comfortable than those dorms we have in Seoul.’

‘Don’t get me started on the dorm here. You’d think that it would be better in Seoul.’

‘It is!’ piped up the one cast member who was serving in Seoul. ‘You guys just got put into an old dorm because there wasn’t anywhere left.’

They all turned at that and started hurling abuse at the poor kid who was laughing hysterically at the celebrities being forced to sleep on thin mattresses and take lukewarm showers when he was living in the newest military dorm in all of Korea. It was a welcome distraction from Ji-hyun’s message and by the time he got back he’d realised that it wasn’t fair. It would have been rude to the cast of “One Hundred Days My Prince” if she had gone to the musical starring two of her past costars and drawn any attention away from her work. She deserved any fun she had—he hadn’t even minded when she’d gone with her castmates to her costar’s concert. 

‘Aish,’ and he punched his pillow trying to make it more comfortable. 

He and the cast spent the next few weeks travelling around the country performing in the musical. The chance of seeing Ji-hyun disappeared and he realised that what he needed was to just focus on the work. It took a greater toll on his body than shooting a drama in many ways. They would travel to a city for a few nights and then back to Seoul and then out again.

A couple of weeks later during a short break back at base, he walked in on a fight between two soldiers from a different unit. One of them he recognised as going to the same university as Ji-hyun. The other was older, broader and mean looking. Chang-wook held back. The last thing he could do would be to intervene. A celebrity getting involved in a fight on base would look very bad—not just for him but also for the musical.

‘Saekkiya! Yah! Take her name out of your mouth.’

‘What? Little boy? You going to make me? You got a crush? You like girls like her?’

‘Saekkiya!!!!!!’ The university student screamed and managed to land a punch that knocked out the bigger man. 

‘What happened?’ Chang-wook asked one of the other soldiers.

‘Aish. That bastard made some comment about Nam Ji-hyun. Poor Tae-hwan lost it and threw the first punch. I don’t know what is going to happen. The other guy is a bully but…’

Chang-wook and the others watched as career military officers came in and dragged the soldiers away. A couple of days later, Chang-wook bumped in the Tae-hwan outside the showers. He was covered in bruises and looked completely worn out. 

‘Everything ok?’ Chang-wook asked. ‘I heard…’

‘Yeah. I don’t know what happened. I just saw red. The things he was saying.’ 

‘I… I know she would appreciate it how you stood up for her. And, um, I hope you don’t get into trouble.’

‘Nah. They are just hushing it up. I guess having… Nevermind. Thanks though… and um… if she ever visits… will you let me know?’

Chang-wook nodded. He’d never expected something like this could happen. And wasn’t it supposed to be him to jump in and protect Ji-hyun’s name? Not some Chaebol’s son who went to a good university. He thought about how he could… he didn’t know what but in the end he sent Ji-hyun a message saying that a really big fan of hers was here. Would she record a message for him? She sent back a short video.

‘Tae-hwan-sshi! Annyeong! I hope that you are keeping healthy. Eat well! FIGHTING!’

Chang-wook held back showing the other man the video for a week before he deleted it. In the end, he couldn’t bring himself to share her with the other soldiers. And the claustrophobia of the base was starting to get at him. While the musical had been hard work it had been fun. Casting him and Ha-neul was a publicity move, he knew that. Two handsome, well-know celebrities who had long track records as musical theatre performers. Still, it had felt good performing. 

He had a brief leave in the Fall and used it to blow off some steam. He went out with the boys for a night of drinking. They sat around in the VIP lounge and joked about serving in the military and being away from girls for such a long time.

‘It must be killing you,’ one of them smirked.

‘It’s fine. I know! That sounds weird but you are so tired at the end of the day that all you want to do is sleep. Just you wait. You’ll be heading off soon enough.’

‘Not until the last minute. Hey… let’s go back to… Chang-wook. Hyung? You want to continue the party elsewhere?’

It was the cue that the younger men used to say that they were going into one of the private rooms. There were usually girls there. And it was not his scene.

‘I’ll head home first.’ And he waved at the others before slipping out and getting into a pre-booked car. In his drunken haze, he thought about calling Ji-hyun but decided against it. No point when he was drunk. He didn’t like to think that all he did when he was on leave was drink. And he hadn’t told her about the leave either. It was the guilt about the video. His selfish and jealous response to someone liking her and, of course, the fact that someone else had taken a punch for her. Where had he been? Worrying about his career and reputation. Instead, when got home he called Chi-gu.

‘Hey. God, you are drunk. Did you go out with them?’ No need to say names. Chi-gu wasn’t a big fan of the party-hard types.

‘Yeah. I… I needed to blow off some steam.’

‘You didn’t call her did you?’

‘I’m not that stupid. Why can’t I call you? Do you think she is the only one I think about?’

‘When you are drunk, yeah, probably.’

‘My dear friend. I am drunk. And I wanted to hear your beautiful voice before I go back to base and have to listen to a drill sergeant shouting my name. She wouldn’t want to talk to me anyway. I’m drunk.’

‘Omo! Our poor Wookie… afraid his girlfriend will be mad that he got drunk! Give me a break. You just feel guilty.’

‘Yeah. Fine. I do. Have a problem with that? What am I going to do? I should just end things with her. Wait until I get out and then see how things work.’

‘Where was this level headed thinking at the beginning. Why didn’t you wait.’

‘Because I like her. I’m not going to hold back… and if she stops…’

‘You are a broken record. You said that in your fanmeet.’

‘I didn’t name her.’

‘No. That at least was smart. Instead… you have every woman who ever thought you were handsome fantasying that you could be talking about them.’

‘But I wasn’t.’

‘But you weren’t. Call her. I’m going to bed.’ Chi-gu hung up. 

Chang-wook looked at his phone. Call? No, it was too late. But he could send her a message.

Jiji, are you doing well? I am on break. I’m sorry I didn’t call. It was so short and I know you are busy. Everyone loves the drama. I am glad it is doing so well. It is getting colder so if you visit, wrap up warm. I’d be grateful if you could visit.

He sent the message and passed out. When he woke up it was past noon. Only eight hours until he had to be back at base. 

‘Eomma?’

‘Aish. What is this? You come home and don’t see anyone but those boys. They will run into trouble one of these days. Mark my words.’

‘Yeah. They are a bit…’

‘You are getting too old for them. When you settle down… When you meet a nice girl, she won’t want you spending your time around people like that. Nice girls don’t like…’

‘Eomma. I know. It’s ok. I won’t go out with them. Last night is the last time.’

‘Are you ok? What is the matter?’

‘You know of course...’

‘My son. My charming son. What is there to worry about. She is very lovely. I like her new drama. She has a lovely smile and I like her Eomma too.’

‘Her Eomma?’

‘No, no. We haven’t met. But I had tea with Kim Soo-hyun’s eomma and she told me how lovely Ji-hyun’s eomma is. Of course, they met, oh, it must be almost ten years ago! But she was very charming. We have a little group and she might join.’

‘Do you…’

‘Oh! All the eomma’s meet each other occasionally. When you all bring us to an award show or we visit on set. Let’s see… Kim Soo-hyun’s eomma… I must have met her at a gathering about a year ago? Because you all went off to the army at the same time.’

Chang-wook let his eomma continue talking in her calming manner as she set out food for lunch. He regretted sleeping in and missing breakfast with her but this would have to do. 

‘Chang-Wook-ah, don’t worry. Everything will be alright,’ his mother took his hand in her familiar warm grasp. She gave a small squeeze. ‘She is waiting. Don’t worry. Girls like her don’t change. They stay loyal. Keep that in your heart. Don’t worry my son.’

Her words lifted his spirits and took him through the next few months. Ji-hyun’s letters and messages were also a blessing. She was planning a trip and wanted to know where he recommended. He gave his vote to Vietnam because of the warm sunshine. She sent him photographs of the beaches and of the food she was eating. When she got back, she told him she was going to be travelling again. This time Europe. 

‘Won’t it be cold?’ He asked.

‘But I like the cold!’ Came the reply.

He smiled. They were so different. He hated being cold. And now that winter was here he hated it even more. The army did not believe in heaters or warm coats for the soldiers. They needed to tough it out. But she was firm. It was Europe with a friend travelling all over by bus and train. He envied her the freedom to travel so anonymously. Of course Europe was different to Asia. His friends who had been to Europe loved how easy it was to move around without any fans following or taking pictures. He flicked through his phone looking up various things you could do in summer in Europe. Greece and Spain looked nice, he decided. Maybe they could go there one day. It might even be easier to slip in and out without anyone realising they had disappeared overseas at the same time. He started to make plans. He’d have to do a drama when he got discharged. His company were already collecting interesting scripts. And then maybe their schedules would align and he could persuade her to travel with him. Perhaps before that they could go to Busan together. There would be time between starting the drama and his discharge date. That would be perfect. A repeat of their first date but this time it would go according to plan.