Thank you for reading! This chapter is all in Jeonghan's POV. I just want to warn you that in this chapter, he doesn't have a healthy coping mechanism, a behaviour I don't encourage to repeat.

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Jeonghan didn’t have a real plan when he boarded the airplane to L.A. The flight had been long, but he spent almost all the time sleeping, because he felt exhausted. And when he finally arrived, he took the decision to rent an apartment near the beach instead of checking in a hotel, he didn’t want his parents to track him that easily.

 The first three days passed in a blur full of parties and drinking, but that only left him feeling more empty and lonely. So in the fourth day he decided to sleep most of the day and eat a proper meal. He also bought some groceries feeling somehow accomplished, since he never did that on his own. At the end he included many bottles of beer and soju, after all he still felt like drinking before going to sleep at night.

On his fifth day in L.A he finally decided to go to the beach, the weather was nice and it had been a while since he actually spent a relaxing time like that. He also got excited with the idea of going to the beach festival the next day.

During all those days he tried to forget the things that happened back in Seoul, but at random moments his mind would take him back there. Like when he went to pick up his wallet and saw his cellphone next to it on top of the nightstand.  He remembered his mother’s shocked face, his father saying “I told you so…”, the shouts, the tears and everything that happened when he announced his breakup with Seungcheol. And he could only close his eyes and take a deep breath to calm himself. And even when he knew his mother was probably worried and Seungcheol too, he couldn’t dare to turn his phone on.

The next morning he went to the beach to take a walk enjoying the feeling of the sand under his feet, the sea breeze and the shinning sun. The beach festival was about to start and the area was rapidly becoming crowded, but instead of returning to his apartment, Jeonghan embraced this unusual experience and ate from the food stands and tried to fly a kite. He felt great every time he was treated like any tourist instead of all the overdone protocol when he would visit one of the Yoon Hotels and related restaurants.

He was enjoying his day, finally feeling liberated from all the overwhelming thoughts that clouded his mind, but everything stopped when he heard his voice. He was thanking a radio station for the festival and he invited the next singer to the stage, but for Jeonghan the words were the least important thing at the moment and he could only focus on his compelling voice. Jeonghan started walking towards the stage needing to see him closer even when the screens were showing his face.

His heart was beating faster than ever before, because he knew that even when a part of him wasn’t expecting anything when he bought his airplane ticket to L.A, another part of him had been expecting to find the other waiting for him.

So he didn’t care when people started chanting for the singer or the increasing number of people surrounding him, his eyes could only focus on the other. Jeonghan saw him talking a bit with other people on the side of the stage before leaving the restricted area and walking towards the open space were the crowd was.

Jeonghan knew if he stayed rooted to his place he would lose his opportunity to talk to the other, so he started running towards him colliding with several people, but he didn’t care and even when he felt his heart about to explode he kept running. But when he was about to reach him, the other turned around waving to a bunch of people and Jeonghan just reacted out of desperation.

“Jisoo!” He shouted and stood there panting.

He wasn’t sure if the other had heard him with all the noise, but then he saw him turn around slowly.

Jisoo looked back at him for a moment, before turning to talk to his group of friends and Jeonghan trembled in fear of a rejection. But then he turned back to him and started walking in his direction.

“Hi Jeonghan.”  He said with his soft voice and a smile, but Jeonghan’s words got stuck in his throat and he could only look back at him in silence.

The singer on stage was livening up the crowd and the noise was all around them, so Jisoo took a step closer.

“Do you want to go for a drink nearby?”

Jeonghan nodded not trusting his voice and followed the other as they walked away from the festival in silence. His eyes traveled from the other’s face to the ground not believing he was just next to him. They entered a small bar not far away from Jeonghan’s apartment and sat down. Jisoo ordered two beers after receiving Jeonghan’s small nod of approval and they remained in silence once again.

With Jisoo sitting so close, Jeonghan couldn’t stop looking at his face as he felt all sort of emotions. And as memories started to flood his mind, Jisoo gave him a small smile.

“So…Jeonghan, how have you been?”

Jeonghan remained silent looking back at him.

“The last thing I heard was that you started dating Seungcheol.”

Jeonghan looked down feeling a pang in his chest. He had traveled all the way from Seoul wanting to forget that and it was ironic that Jisoo was the one asking about it.

“I guess it didn’t work…” Jisoo said with a guilty tone.

Jeonghan still didn’t say a word or look up, but he could listen as Jisoo took his beer bottle and started drinking. He also heard him sigh before he spoke again.

“Jeonghan…I know I’m years too late, but I just wanted to apologize.”

And those words managed to make Jeonghan look up with a shocked expression.

“The last time we saw each other I was cruel to you; and for a long time I blamed myself for treating you so badly when you were just worried about our future.” Jisoo sighed again. “I was just a dumb kid who refused to acknowledge the reality and pushed you away in the worst way. I blindly believed in my dream of becoming a famous musician, but life showed me how unprepared I was for all of it. And after just a year my band disbanded and I had no place to sleep or money to eat. I knew I had hit rock bottom and realized that I never thought of a backup plan in case things didn’t work out. I had no degree or job experience and it took me a while to finally live at peace with myself.”

Jeonghan felt his eyes watering looking at the other and how he never found out how much he had suffered after their breakup. He wanted to hug him and never let go.

“Luckily I found a wonderful girl that changed my life for the better. And my son-”

“What?” Jeonghan gasped moving his eyes to look at Jisoo’s hand where he found a wedding ring in his finger. He bit his lower lip and turn to look at the other side, but he knew there were tears already falling from his eyes and there was an increasing ache in his chest.

“Jeonghan…” Jisoo called him softly.

He had thought about it; about the possibility that Jisoo could find another person and start anew, but he had always suppressed the idea altogether, and yet here he was, facing the reality of a married Jisoo and a kid.

“Jeonghan?” Jisoo’s voice was so soft and calm like always. The kind of voice that calmed Jeonghan’s senses, but this time it was breaking his heart.

“I need to go.” He said standing up without turning to look back at the other.

“Jeonghan wait!” The other grabbed his arm and before he could react he felt the tip of a pen marking his skin.

“This is my number. If you want to talk again…” Jisoo said with a nervous voice before letting go of his arm.

Jeonghan left the bar with more tears wetting his cheeks and practically ran to his rented apartment. He felt destroyed just like the first time they broke up, but on the contrary this time he was the only one suffering.

He spent the next three days drinking his pain away in his apartment with the curtains closed. He had passed out on the bed, on the floor, in the bathroom, but he didn’t care. He had been a fool for believing Jisoo would wait for them to meet again or believing that things would be simpler this time.

When he woke up he wasn’t sure what time was it, but as he looked around he noticed his dirty clothes and the empty bottles all over the floor and felt alone and miserable. He tried to stand up only to fall back to the floor bringing down a pillow and his cellphone with him.

He looked at the mobile device for a long time remembering Jisoo’s words about calling him, but he noticed the numbers on his arm had almost disappeared after being stained with soju and water when he tried to clean his throw up.

New tears started appearing in his eyes, but at the end he grabbed his phone and turned it on.  He had several missed calls and messages from his parents, Chan, his friends and Seungcheol.

Are you ok?

That was all Seungcheol’s last message said and without thinking too much or maybe realizing he was the only one he could trust at this moment, Jeonghan texted back.

I don’t know

He was being honest with that, he was mess at the moment and yet, he knew deep inside that there was no other option than accepting the reality of what was happening.

You will be okay

Seungcheol answered after a moment and Jeonghan was glad he was being his supportive-self instead of asking where he was.

Jeonghan’s hand trembled as he texted his next words.

I met Jisoo

I’m glad you did

Jeonghan grabbed him throbbing head and looked down. Upon seeing Jisoo on that stage he had also felt like that, but not after knowing the other had completely moved on with his life.

He has a wife and a kid

He saw on the screen how the other was typing, then it stopped and then he was typing again. But suddenly there was an incoming call and he accepted without saying a word.

“Jeonghan.”

He didn’t answer.

“Jeonghan.”

“Seungcheol...” He answered with a broken voice.

He heard the other gasp.

“You have been drinking.” Seungcheol said with a soft voice. “Jeonghan don’t drink anymore.” He said almost pleading.

“I don’t have any more alcohol to drink.” Jeonghan answered with a soft chuckle.

He heard Seungcheol sigh at his words just like he did when he saw him completely drunk and refusing to explain what happened with Jisoo when he returned to Korea years ago.

“Jeonghan…about Jisoo…” The other started after being quiet for a short time.

 “I really loved him Seungcheol…” Jeonghan heard himself saying as tears started falling again.

“I know…I know you did…” The other said with a soothing voice.

“I didn’t get to say goodbye…again” Jeonghan said trying to wipe away his tears.

“Jeonghan…what happened back then?”

He stayed in silence for a moment hugging his knees close to his chest and putting his head on top. Seungcheol waited for him in silence too.

“I…We…we fought because he wanted to stay here and be a musician. He dropped university and refused to return with me to work at Yoon Hotels. But more than that he said he felt like he wasn’t enough for my family and for me; that I couldn’t understand it, because I was just a rich kid. That…I was ashamed of him…that I never fought for us…” Jeonghan hated that he was crying again even when his heart had felt warm after Jisoo’s apology.

Seungcheol took his time answering with a sad voice. “You did everything you could for him, I was a witness of that, but I guess that wasn’t what he wanted.”

 “Yeah…I realized that….” Jeonghan sobbed softly before talking again. “Seungcheol…I tried to make things better when I was with you, but I screwed it up again. I’m sorry, I’m sorry I did the same to you… I destroyed what we had.”

“Jeonghan…” Seungcheol said with a soft voice. “I don’t blame you for what happened to us. We took our own decisions and I knew you tried to do your best for me and for that I’m thankful.”

Jeonghan sobbed again before speaking. “I’m glad we dated, Seungcheol, I don’t regret it at all.”

Seungcheol and he had been friends for years before they started dating and when things had been horrible with his parents or Jisoo he had always been there for him. And after they started dating Seungcheol had been the only one to turn his frown into smiles and cover his sadness with hugs and kisses.

“I miss you…” Jeonghan said with a small smile.

“I miss you too…”

Jeonghan chuckled softly knowing Seungcheol had started crying too. They both knew that after breaking up things would never be the same, there were so many issues and people involved, but at least like this, in the vulnerability of this phone call they could say things like this.

They stayed in silence once again, but after a moment he heard the other sniff and cough before talking.

“Jeonghan, take your time in there…I’m sure you will make things right this time.”

“How are you so sure about that?” Jeonghan asked not trusting himself.

“Because you are Yoon Jeonghan…the same guy that tricked me into swimming in a lake in the middle of December and laughed at me when I almost died frozen.”

Jeonghan heard himself laugh. It had been a while since the last time he did it.

“You are too gullible Seungcheol.”

“And you are too smart. You’ll become the best general manager of Yoon Hotels if that is what you want to do. And you will amend things with Jisoo if that’s what you think you need to do. Yoon Jeonghan, you are more than Yoon Hotel’s heir. You just have to acknowledge that.”

The other was saying all the things he need to hear.

“You are smiling now…” Seungcheol said softly and Jeonghan touched his face realizing it was true. “Jeonghan…your father can say whatever he wants about you, but I know you that apart from being smart and well deserving of your job, you are kind and really care for the ones you love. I have seen you hug your mom with so much love and the fact that you were always there for Chan speaks volumes of you.”

Jeonghan felt like he should really stop crying, but a few tears started falling.

“Thanks Seungcheol.” He said softly.

“I need to go to sleep now. Take care okay?”

“Okay” Jeonghan answered.

“I’ll tell Chan you are doing okay. He is worried sick about you.” Seungcheol said with a serious voice.

Jeonghan let himself smile again. Chan was his baby.

“Thanks…I’ll send him some pictures later.”

Seungcheol hummed in agreement and then cut the call with a soft goodbye.

Jeonghan wiped away his tears and stood up slowly. He walked towards the window and opened the curtains; after all, it was a new day.