Member: Hoshi

"Babe, I'm really sorry about this. You know my work." Soonyoung rested his chin on your shoulder as he hugged you from behind at the veranda of your condo unit.

"Hey, I understand." You held his hand that is wrapped around your waist to give him assurance. "As long as you do well, I'm fine with waiting."

Seventeen's comeback just started and their world tour is already set meaning it would be harder for the both of you to find time for each other. Plus being the team's performance team leader, Soonyoung would definitely be even busier that even if he still in Korea and the tour hasn't began, he would barely have time to spend with you. He has lots of things to do every single day and you can't blame him for that. If anyone can complain surely it's not you in position because it's your own will to date an idol.

"Fridays are yours. I'm really sorry."

"Are you sure you can give me your Fridays?" Just wanting to make sure, you turned to face him. Even though you're on for almost one and a half year, you still can't get used with him being gone. His presence is just too good that even a short while of absence is overly felt.

"I promise." He gave you relief when he cupped your face and planted a small kiss on your forehead. Since this isn't the first time this is gonna happen and so far Soonyoung hasn't break any of his promises.

Soonyoung was gone and instead, there was only Hoshi. You get to see him everyday on TV and his passion for what he does is always admirable. He motivates you to do your own work as well. Your boyfriend is the best you could ever ask for, kind, sweet and caring. Sometimes you feel like you are very undeserving of him and he's too good for you but everytime you tell him those, he clears your worries by embracing you in his warmth and thanking you for choosing him.

"Soonyoung is really lovely isn't he?" Minseo handed you a bouquet of flowers that she got from the delivery man on her way up. There was a note attached to it.

Have a great day and don't forget to smile. I miss you. -H

And as soon as your read it, your lips began to curve upwards. Sweet. He never fails to make you happy even with these little things.

"Lucky girl. So when is he leaving?" You almost forgot that Minseo is still there. Atleast there is one person that knows about you and Soonyoung.

"Sounds like you're hurrying him."

"Of course! If he's gone then you're mine." She pointed out in a matter of factly way.

"Jealous brat! Next month, probably." Just thinking about it hurts you but as if there's another choice. You are just thankful that tomorrow is Friday.

"I just hope you won't barge in to my house again and ask me to drink soju with you because you miss Soonyoung and everything. Like what you did when they shot a variety show."

"Well, One Fine Day was so succesful. My tears were all worth it."

"But can't you be just happy with him without crying? You cry all the time because of him!"

"I don't!"

"Woah, I have receipts here." She waved her phone that is probably filled with screenshots of your texts and videochats.

"Maybe I'm just a crybaby but believe me, Soonyoung never made me cry. I can't be happier with him."

"Okay if you say so." Minseo doesn't look, at the very least, convinced by what you just said.

***

It was a very beautiful Friday morning. The day you have been waiting for the whole week. Being a clingy girlfriend is not a part of your concept but maybe Soonyoung deserves it.

"Hey, what's with your aura today?" Minseo raised an eyebrow at you as she put some files on your table. You wore nice clothes and prepped yourself up, looking forward to seeing Soonyoung.

"Thanks for bringing me this. You may go now." There is a bright smile on your face because if Minseo noticed, that means Soonyoung would most probably notice too.

"You look nice, what's the occasion?"

"I'm just a bit prepared."

"For what?"

You just shrugged while pushing her out of your office at the same time. You were just shy to tell her that you did those efforts for Soonyoung. She might think it's funny since it isn't your personality at all.

I miss you. You texted him.

Opening up Seventeen's Twitter, you saw a photo of Soonyoung posted last night. The thing is, you are your own boyfriend's fan. You keep yourself updated in their SNS just so you could keep track of his activities. His bustling schedule may be very tiring and draining but because he's productive and he enjoys his job, it doesn't weigh him at all.

Or maybe he just won't show you.

The clock continued ticking inside your office and along with it, you gradually finished the piled up work. It was exhausting but you were only excited knowing that you'll have a dose of your human energy pill later.

"It's past 5." Minseo knocked on your door. "Are you not going yet?"

"I'm waiting for Soonyoung."

"Oh so that was what all these are about." She pertained to your overall appearance. "What time will he come?"

Honestly, you have no idea. He didn't contact you all day. Not even a reply on your message this morning but you know he will come, "Soon."

"Oh." There was confusion in her face, hearing your answer. She knows you'll wait long. "Should I stay with you before he comes?"

"You should go first."

"You sure?"

You just nodded.

"Okay, goodluck."

Then hours passed.

If you only knew that you would be waiting long and you'll be left there bored, you should've let Minseo stay. It's getting late and there, still, are no signs of Soonyoung. You tried calling him after sending lots of text messages only to get not even a single response. He never broke his promises, even once. He isn't the type to leave you hanging and so you couldn't help but think that maybe something happened to him. Rather than being disappointed, you are worried.

You decided to pack up and go home. On your way, you still kept on contacting him but he remains unreachable. If only s knew that you exist, as his girlfriend, then maybe you could atleast get a hold of him through them but the thing is they don't know anything about the two of you. Soonyoung doesn't want to tell them yet and you are not ready either so you both agreed to keep it private for now.

After hours of worrying, you finally got a reply from him. Apparently, the group decided to keep the whole day productive. Without any long rest, they tired themselves out for the upcoming concert. It was indeed an understandable reason so you shook it off and reminded him to keep in touch in these kinds of situations and not to make you worry again.

"I really miss you. I'll make it up to you next Friday, I promise." There was exhaustion in his voice. You, being a very understanding girlfriend, wanted to give him enough rest by ending the conversation.

"Just, always, be careful."

"You too. You know I love you so much and I'm really sorry."

"It's okay. Take care, I love you."

But if you both were to contemplate, the words you said were not just words of encouragement and understanding. It can somehow be heard as a premonition as well.

***

"What is it about now?" Your voice was calm. It always was. Despite being so unhappy with what is happening.

You were talking over the phone again, because it's Friday and he couldn't make it again, too. You may not want to get used with him being gone but it's as if the situation's training you to.

"We're on our way to a surprise dinner with the CEO. I can't make it." He sounds done, different from the bright aura he radiates that can be felt even through a phone call.

"Baby, is there something wrong?" Hoping he would vent out just anything to you, you decided to bring it up.

"I'm just tired. There were last minute changes on some parts of the choreography and you know that those are all on me." Instead of complaining to him because of his absence, you just want to hug him now and tell him he did well.

"You're gonna be fine. You're great, remember? Prince Hoshi?" You heard him chuckle on the other line and it somehow lessened your burdens. "But don't I really get to see you before you leave? It's been weeks." Their departure is in two days but you wouldn't even see his face before that. He'll be gone for three months and that is not a short period of time.

"I'll make it up to you, I promise."

"Okay, just take care."

There was a tinge of gloom in your voice even if you tried to sound encouraging. You are no less than saddened by the situation but as if you have anything to demand when he says it's work. You are very much aware of how much Soonyoung loves his job and so it hurts you everytime you realize that you are not his priority. That is basically what the situation implies- he has no time because there are more important things to do first before you.

But.

If you love someone, you will make time for her and it doesn't necessarily have to be Friday to do that.

Soonyoung actually departed without seeing you. He felt bad when he did but that's just how it happened. Unfortunately, he is an idol and there are many things he wants to do but his time doesn't allow. He couldn't date freely and even if he does, his busy schedule will always be in the way. The world he is in is totally different from yours and that is why even if you tell him you understand, you don't totally do. It's just plain hard but losing each other is not part of your plans either.

The first week he's gone, he actively reported to you every single day. He texted, called and even videocalled. He almost tried all sorts of communication means just to be in touch with you and that is why even if he's gone, you do not feel his absence that much. It would it have been great if it continued all the way until he's back.

It was always a good morning when Soonyoung greeted you first thing but then it slowly disappeared. No matter how busy he is, a simple message wouldn't be too heavy to do but you tried to understand him, again. You texted him and sent him encouragements with it but he never replied on time. Brainwashing yourself that it's fine is so hard and painful. And even if you don't want to admit it, evidently, he changed.

He feels bad whenever he reads your texts two hours later and misses your calls. It's not as if he does it on purpose and he doesn't have any new excuse or reason either. He's busy and that was it. Concerts are extremely tiring as well that he just falls asleep as soon as they reach the dorm. If only he was less burdened as a member but he wasn't just a member. He is the leader of the most active unit which makes people expect more from him.

"Vlive, you save me too." You whispered as you lie on your bed with your phone held in your hands.

You wait for their live broadcast every night. There are times when Soonyoung is not included in the broadcast and there are also times when they are complete. Unlike what Soonyoung does to your messages, you make sure not to miss the chance of seeing him even through this. You tried commenting but as if he would notice it when many other fans are sending too.

The farther he traveled for their world tour, the farther your relationship became. Not all people are martyrs and not all people can last expecting. Especially if you are the only one holding on. Constantly making a fool out of yourself just because you try to consider his situation is a great sacrifice but it can't possibly apply forever. Sometimes you have to have concern for yourself in order to keep going because how can you be capable of loving someone else if you leave yourself with nothing?

Soonyoung has no idea of what you are going through. He knows that you understand why he couldn't do his responsibilities. Soon, you don't text or call him that often anymore. By this time, he should be scared that probably you will start ignoring him too and he will have nothing more than regret but because you tell him it's fine, he feels assured.

He just wants to hold you now. Badly.

***

"Hello, Korea!" Mingyu screamed as the airplane landed. The first half of the world tour ended in 3 months and he has a month to stay before the second half starts.

"Manager hyung, I need to go somewhere. Right away." Soonyoung wants to see you the most possible it can be.

"Is that a request, Soonyoung? I can't take you there right away. I have 5 more members other than you in the car."

"I mean, I'll just go on my own." He looks exasperated and his seatmate, Wonwoo, noticed it.

"That can't be. The fans are waiting outside." The manager answered in an equally frustrated way. "Plus, there is nothing urgent written in your schedule today."

"It's personal matters, hyung."

"The only personal thing about all of you is family and today is not family day."

Soonyoung sat back on his seat. He doesn't feel good at all. There is so much in his mind these past weeks including you and he didn't even realize that what he is doing is not appropriate anymore. Of course since no one knows about his situation.

"Are you alright?" Wonwoo beside him noticed how frustrated he is and the fact that it sporadically happens alarms him. Even an eclipse wouldn't compare to its rarity but recently, he is a witness of how much Soonyoung's mood had changed.

They are all busy but of everyone, Soonyoung looks bothered the most. He has a bright aura but recently, it was as if he's longing for something or someone he doesn't know.

"Yeah." He simply answered despite the look on his face.

Wonwoo doesn't have enough courage to ask him again because it might just trigger his personal emotions, he can only tap his shoulders to help him ease out. It may not appear that the two are very caring to each other but they are the closest in their line. Actually, Soonyoung considered telling Wonwoo about you but the chance never came so he ended up hiding it to himself.

You, on the other hand, didn't know that today is the day your inactive boyfriend will arrive. Literally he went to far places but he seemed farther than those. Like he is not reachable anymore. It even hit you harder when you scanned through Twitter and saw Carats' posts about him, praising him and complimenting him. Every after one concert, you want to tell him the same things like how well he did today, as you've seen through the fancams, and how proud you are but you couldn't since contacting him is nearly impossible. You grew tired of expecting him to answer your calls or read your mess