"Oh ." I shake my head, "it's nothing. Don't worry about it. I'm fine." I smile to make it convincing.

"Tell me later?"

I nod. I won't tell him later, I don't want him to worry. But if it makes him feel better now then that's what matters.

He is much taller then me with the shoes on, even when I'm sitting on the counter. I lean into his shoulder and kiss his neck, he laughs and pulls me out to have a good time.

...

I had the time of my life, much better than the last party I went to. I was so excited and drank so much. Kris offered to drive me home but I want to walk, so he walks beside me.

"You're cold" he says and wraps his varsity jacket over my shaking shoulders.

I'm clenching my mouth so I don't shiver but I guess he caught on anyway. The whole ordeal would have make me gag due to how cringy it was but it was so warm in his jacket, I could have melted into it. And it smelt like his warm expensive cologne, I loved it.

"T-thank you babe." I manage.

He laughs and wraps an arm around my shoulders, I push my hands through the sleeves so I can wrap my arms around his waist.

"Hey Tao?"

"Mm?"

"You looked really good today at the party. Like, super hot."

I blush, thankful for the dark so he can't see how tomato red my face turned from just his words.

" I mean it. Did you have fun?"

I nod. "Better than last time."

"What happened last time?"

"Huh? Nothing really..."

"Don't keep things from me, you know I hate that . " his voice was harsh and my alcohol was wearing off the closer we got to my apartment.

"I know. " I whisper Into the dark.

It's silent until we arrive at my complex, up the stairs and to my door. I dig for my keys with one hand, the other holding kris' tightly. I unlock my door and step inside.

"Do you want to come in?" I ask look at our hands.

"Will that make you tell me?"

I stay silent, after a while I nod. He comes inside. Jongdae isn't back. Or his keys would be hanging where I just put mine. I lead Kris to my room and sit with him on my bed.

"I'm sorry for the mess, you know how lazy I am." I laugh a little and turn on the lamp on my desk.

I feel like a little kid you just got busted for smoking, I feel awful, worse than how I feel sick. My stomach's is turning and my throat is dry.

"I don't want you to worry. You are doing so much, I want to be the last thing that you have to worry about." I start

"Taozi, I worry about you every minute I'm not with you. I'm always thinking about what you'd be doing. That's my job. If something is going on I need to know so I can help. "

"How much do you want to know?"

"All of it"

I fumble with the cuffs of his jackets before saying anything. " I don't know if I should show you first or... okay. Backstory first. Right? So I've been bullied a lot, that's why I moved school so often. And my roommate is always concerned for me, he's the one who looks at schools for me. But it doesn't really end. It just gets easier to deal with at some schools than others. It didn't end here. Jongdae almost found out."

I stand up and take off my shirt for the first time in front of kris. But it still felt