On Rainy Days

A RoséxOC ending (Part I)

I wasn't aware how a short amount of time can change a lot of things. It has only been two months after I "rejected" Chaeng indirectly, and all sorts of what ifs and random feelings keep on popping up now and then. 

She never talked to me after what happened, although she would wave or smile at me lightly whenever we pass each other on the hallways. Everything was different with Chaeng now. We don't sit together during lunch, we don't partner up for projects and she obviously avoids me when she has the opportunity. I guess it was my fault for being an overthinker, which led me to pushing the day that I would confront Chaeng about what happened that night. I just couldn't bring it up.

On the other hand, when my friendship with Rosé was shredded into pieces, my relationship with Jisoo which almost got shattered, is whole again. If I'm not with Jennie, I'd be with Jisoo. I joined her and her friends during lunch and we would hang out at my house after school if Jen is too busy with Cheer practice. That's probably the only good thing that happened to me during the two months that had gone by. 

Everybody in the school knows about Jennie and me already. There was no hiding anymore and we freely enjoyed each other's company inside the school without having to think if someone caught us. It was definitey relieving.

However, one thing that didn't change when everything else did, is whatever happened between me and Lisa. I still haven't talked to her. She would try to ask me if I was already okay with her explaining her side, but I wouldn't let her. The anger rises whenever I see her, yet it fades and stays in the dark if she's not around. Why is it so hard to forgive?

"Hey Y/N." Lips touching my cheeks almost startled me. "How was your day?"

I stood up from the bleachers, where I would usually wait whenever my basketball practice ended first. We walked our way out of the school just like everyday. "Same old. You?"

Jennie paused and grinned widely. "I got an A on my project in Chemistry."

"I knew you can do it." I chuckled as I ruffled her hair. She really did worked hard for that one.

"Because of that, let's go out and eat! My treat!" She linked her arms on mine, pulling me to walk faster. She was wearing this smile that catches anyone's attention instantly, almost likely to blind anyone.

I stared at the girl beside me. Jennie still looked the same: pretty, overflowing with confidence, and oozing with charm. She still look like the girl I fell in love with, the girl that I constantly thought about, except the crazy beating heart of mine is gone, the butterflies in my stomach are all gone. 

I've thought about if for the past few weeks. She was the same as before, nothing changed, and I couldn't find the problem. And then I thought, maybe I was the problem. Maybe I didn't want same and unchanging. Maybe I wanted more: an adventure that'll breathe life into me.

I knew that there was a possibility that I've fallen out of love. However, whether it was only temporary or a permanent thing, I can't say. If I was going to give up, I need to to be 100% sure. If I was going to hurt Jennie, I need to be 100% sure.

Although on second thought, even if I was 100% sure that I've already fallen out of love, I doubt I'd have the guts to leave her. I know I can't.

As if the gods knew that all of the students are worn out already, we were given a 5-day break from school. I didn't really know the reason, all I know is I'll be able to sleep really well. But as much as we were all rejoicing, I sure do expect the teachers to give homeworks or projects. They always do that. I already have my 5 day break planned: sleep, watch netflix, eat, then sleep again.

On the other hand, Jennie had already planned her 5-day-break as well. Actually, her father planned it. The two of them are going to a family trip along with their relatives for three days. They invited me to join them but mom didn't allow me, said it was far and three days is long. She didn't actually realize that she leaves me alone in the house for a week whenever she has business trips, but okay. 

Jen's flight was 4 pm during the first day of break. An hour before her flight, she stopped by the house. "I wish we could go on a date first before I go with my dad..."

"Yeah...But you have to go." We were on the living room and it had been a couple of minutes of me telling her to go already. She would end up missing her flight.

"I know."

"It's just for three days anyway."

"Three days is three months or even years without you." Jennie whined, at the same time glared at me.

"You really need to go now though. You don't want to miss your flight."

"I do, actually."

She's a stubborn girl, and the only thing to keep her going is looking at her seriously. "Jen."

A sigh from her tells me that I won, once again. I've always got the upper hand, I wonder why. "Okay, fine. I'll go now." Standing up, we went outside the house. "I'll see you in three days."

With a long lasting hug, she whispered, "I love you." 

For a second, I was frozen. For a second, I was groping for words.

"I love you too."

I love you. Three words that made my stomach churn and my heart jump out of bliss, now they're three words that meant nothing. It was fascinating how the meaning of these words can change in merely two months.

Going on with my day and hoping to keep my mind off of being miserable, I went to the library to return a book that I borrowed. I stayed there for a couple of hours until the loud pouring of the rain reminded me that I had to go home already. 

It was raining cats and dogs outside. Good thing mom forced me to bring the umbrella. 

As I was about to go down the stairs, I noticed a very familiar girl standing in the rain. Her back was facing me, nevertheless, I was sure it's her. Why else would I suddenly feel all nervous if it wasn't her?

She was looking up the sky, and by the looks of it, she was actually enjoying it. 

I was supposed to ignore her, pretend I didn't see her, and go on my way. However, my feet were betraying me as I found myself standing with only a step behind her. I didn't know what to do. I just stood behind her for almost a minute, and she didn't even notice that someone was behind her.

"I thought you don't like getting drenched in the rain," I mumbled, supposedly to myself, but Chaeyoung turned around, completely surprised. 

A smile slowly replaced her initial expression, and now she's looking at me straight into the soul, that is, if I still had it. "Sometimes you end up doing things that you don't like." 

"For what? It's not worth it." I didn't see the point.

She chuckled, glancing quickly on her right side before focusing on me once again. "Yeah it really wasn't worth it. If I could go back I'd still fight for what I wanted."

I wasn't that numb to realize what we were actually talking about. I had a lot of th