> JaexOC >Dr!AU > playlist: Hurt Road - Day6, Marathon - Day6

"My instructions were simple, weren't they? All you had to do was tell the nurse and physio that we should move on to the next phase of treatment already! Can't you get anything right?!"

Jae stood rigidly still with his gaze casted down like a scolded puppy, nodding in acknowledgement to any statement made and apologising at every reprimand thrown his way.

"I promise to be more attentive next time," he assured the senior consultant as she rubbed her hands off with hand sanitizer, stepping past him to walk out of the ward.

"Well you better, or there won't be a next time for you in this department."

Jae gritted his teeth and bowed at the regal woman's retreating figure, only raising his head while releasing a staggered sigh once the very edge of her whitecoat was out of sight. Raking a hand through his hair, he bowed sheepishly to the staff members that were present, a stream of apologies flowing profusely from his lips.

The senior nurse reassured him that it was alright, knowing how pressurised the poor junior doctor felt on his rotation to the burns department. Just yesterday he was reprimanded by the chief consultant of reconstructive surgery in the operating theatre when he made a minor mistake during a skin transplant.

Giving him a comforting pat on the shoulder, the older woman told him to go and get his dinner before carrying out the evening ward rounds. Knowing him, he had most likely skipped lunch to review all the patients’ case notes.

He opened his mouth to veto her but the stare she shot at him - a combination of motherly concern and assertiveness he dared not to challenge - sealed his lips effectively. He knew better than to try and go against her.

Jae bowed once more and walked towards the exit, shoulders slightly slumped, pulled down by the weight of the stethoscope hung around his neck - once such an anticipated article to him, but now akin to a sandbag of burdens on his shoulders.

Swinging open the door towards the staff back stair access, one of the less used stairwells in that particular wing, he let the door close shut on its own, the door damper softly shutting the door. He descended a couple steps down the first flight of stairs below him but stopped, a hand pressed against the wall as if to steady himself.

He allowed himself to slowly slide down, knees folding as he released a long, tired breath. Jae leaned his head limply on the wall, closing his eyes while massaging his temples. Why couldn’t he get anything right lately?

He was trying. He was trying so ing hard. But it was never enough. No matter how late he stayed up trying to review material, or how early he came to make sure he was updated on the patients’ progress over the night before the morning rounds, there was always just something that would slip past his radar.

Jaehyung was beyond exhausted. When he decided to become a doctor, he knew it would be hard. He just didn’t think it would wear him down to the bone like it was now. All that fiery passion he once had, all the motivation and drive he got from looking at his patients - where had that all gone?

These days it felt like every little hiccup he faced was just threatening to push him off the cliff, to make him fall all the way down to the sharp, painful, thorned edges of self-loathing.

And with every passing day that made him feel even more incompetent, with every step further he was pushed to the edge of that cliff, the closer he felt to falling apart. He was breaking down, and he no longer knew how to gather his pieces back together.

The headache that never really left was starting to creep back up around his temples like a persistent bug that just didn’t want to die no matter how many times he swatted it. Before he knew it, he felt his eyes start to get wet.

He tilted his head up and gritted his teeth, really not wanting to cry at work. His shift was almost over. He just had to it up till the evening rounds and handover was over.

He was just beginning to take a few deep breaths when he heard a door a couple floors beneath him open. He stilled, holding his breath, waiting for the sound of ascending or descending footsteps. But neither came.

A minute passed and there was still no sound, so he assumed the person probably didn’t walk into the stairwell after all. After a few more moments, Jaehyung decided he was calmed down enough and was just about to stand to go down and get his dinner.

He pushed himself to a standing position, only to stop with his knees half unfolded as a soft hum echoing up the stairwell froze him in place again. Instinctively, he crouched down even though the person clearly wouldn’t be able to see him since he was on a higher floor.

He peeked down, finding a ponytail of long dark brown hair and a white coat a floor beneath his. A fellow doctor, perhaps? Or a pharma- nope, a doctor. The stethoscope sticking out of her pocket was just barely visible from his line of sight.

As quietly as he could, he sat back down, not wanting to announce his presence since it might make her feel awkward - she had begun singing, with zero inkling that she had an audience.

He rested against the railing, listening to her quiet voice being carried along to him by the acoustic properties of the stairwell. Her voice sounded somewhat familiar, like he’d heard it somewhere before, but he couldn’t really put a finger on it. But what he was paying more attention to were the lyrics of the slow, soothing song she was singing.

How many times a day

Will my tears swell up?

Even though I try to count

I can’t

Because I’m always trying to hold the tears in

Jaehyung touched his cheek, suddenly realising it was wet. Goddamnit, he thought. But it felt good. To just let it go. Even the headache felt like it was dissipating now that he was letting himself release all that pent up tension. But he still reached up to dry his cheeks anyway, listening intently all the while.

You knew and I knew

That this is not an easy road

It’s not that you and I didn’t know

That not many flowers bloom on this road

The flowers that are seen from time to time

I didn’t know how precious they were

Because they’re so beautiful and lovely

Should we stay here?...

Something tugged inside him and he felt the floodgates straining not to overflow once more and release the reserves of his dam of tears (honestly, why did it never seem to dry out?). Yes, he knew full well that this wasn’t going to be an easy path. But he decided to stay anyway.

Because seeing that excited smile on the little kid who could finally bend his hand after having it in a cast for a month, or feeling the grasp of those frail, aged, fingers clasped around his own as unending words of gratitude were being poured out - those things were worth it. The flowers that occasionally bloomed along the path he trod on were far too beautiful, he couldn’t ever see himself taking a detour.

Deciding not to disturb his colleague, he quietly climbed down the few steps to the next plateau, all the while listening as she repeated the chorus and refrain, her voice getting closer as he began descending down the remaining flight of stairs, finding that she had gotten up from the steps and was now seated underneath the stretcher bag hung in the corner of the 2nd floor landing.

If she had her eyes open, she probably would’ve caught him in her peripheral vision by now. But her eyes were closed as she sang, seeming to be doing so to soothe herself. He waited politely for her to end the song, and when she remained silent after, he cleared his throat, making his presence known.

The girl’s eyes snapped open as she jumped in shock at the sudden invasion of the silence, in turn knocking her head on the bottom of the stretcher bag, causing it to fall off the hook with a loud thud. She gasped, looking up at Jae just for a fleeting second in her panicked state, immediately apologizing to no one in particular before trying to lift the bag but failing to do so in her fumbled state. It didn’t help that it was friggin heavy.

Jae hurried down the remaining steps, saying ‘I’m so sorry, oh my god,’ so many times it was almost comical. He set his laptop down and hefted the bag back up on the hook with ease, making his fellow physician blush in embarrassment at her earlier struggle.

Jae felt extremely bad about showing himself now. Maybe he should have just gone out the door he came from and taken the lift. But… he felt like he needed to say something, weird as that was.

“I’m really so, so sorry Dr…” he snuck a look at her nametag. “Kwon,” she replied before he could speak. “Just Janelle’s fine, though,” she continued.

He stuck out a hand in greeting. “I’m-” he began, only to be interrupted again. “Dr. Park, I know,” she took his hand good naturedly, her handshake firm despite her small frame.

“We went to the same university, but I’m from the graduating class after yours. I’ve seen you perform at the uni festivals before, so,” she explained meekly, rubbing the back of her neck. She was probably still feeling abashed.

Jae nodded, finally realising why she looked - and sounded - so familiar. He saw her at the fest just before his graduation a little over a year ago; being pushed up on stage by her friends during the open mic.

He was packing up his guitar when the crowd cheered for the sacrificial sheep standing on stage, clearly not very comfortable in front of the crowd.

He had every intention to leave after packing up since he had to rush back to the dorms to pack his overnight bag. He was starting his 5th year clinical rotation at a specialist centre in a regional hospital a couple hours away, and he'd have to leave the following morning. But then she started singing and his hand paused mid-air as it picked the strap of his guitar case up.

Her voice still sounded shaky and reluctant, much like her demeanor upon being pushed on stage. But when he finally walked down the backstage and caught a glimpse of her up front, she had closed her eyes and begun singing without the initial nerves she had. And boy, was she captivating.

“You can just call me Jaehyung,” the older man offered, trying to release some of the awkward tension surrounding them. But Janelle looked shocked at the mere prospect. “No, you’re a senior, I couldn’t-”

“Really, I insist,” he affirmed, “I don’t believe in all that hierarchy rubbish. Besides, it's not like we're complete strangers.”

Janelle drew her lips into a thin line and just nodded wordlessly, figuring it was futile to disagree. Her eyes flitted up to his face, then immediately skittered away to look around at anywhere but him. She had almost forgotten how bloody attractive the infamous Dr. Park was.

He was known to be a bit of a wild child during school years. Always the life of the party. Not to mention he had a little fan following, what with his band (a bunch of high school friends that were taking different majors but ended up in universities close enough to each other that they stuck together) and their constant appearances at school festivals and charity fundraisers.

The boys of 5Live were pretty well-known back during their university days. There was the talented, breathtakingly handsome bassist business management major; the enigmatic acoustic guitarist, who was an education major that could kill the audience with a single look.

Then came the drummer - an early childhood sophomore who didn't sing much, but when he did, that deep, throaty voice drove the crowd nuts. The keyboardist of the group was also an early childhood major, though he was a junior. And the only apt way to describe him would be that he was the literal embodiment of a walking ball of sunshine.

And of course, finally. There was the 182cm tall man who stood before her. Electric guitar. Medical student back then, medical officer by now. God only knows how he managed to balance his studies along with meeting up with the band, but he graduated among the top of his cohort.

(Honestly how did any of them even get such good grades with all the workload they had?)

Having only just graduated a few months back, Janelle had caught wind that Dr. Park (whom she's had a tiny crush on since the first time she watched 5Live perform during her freshman year) was currently an MO at the hospital she would be carrying out her houseman/internship year.

But if she ever fantasised about bumping into him in the hospital, it definitely wasn't like this. And not on such a ty day, too. What's worse was that her head still kinda hurt from hitting the stretcher bundle.

She subconsciously reached up to rub on what felt like a small bump starting to develop itself, earning another apology from the man before her as he reached over to palpate the area as well. This of course, caused a rush of blood to shoot up to her cheeks (God, she thought she was over that small crush. Well clearly, she thought wrong).

Noticing her flustered state, Jae bit his inner lip to stop himself from smirking, dropping his hand from her head. He picked his laptop up, scratching his head with his free hand, thinking about how to say what he wanted to say next. Just then, his stomach growled obnoxiously loudly, earning a stifled laugh from his junior which turned his ears a deep red.

Well, let's just go with that, then. “I was actually just about to go get some dinner. I was wondering if you… You know, like, if you're free right now- if you'd like to go grab a bite together? I have to be back for ward rounds soon, though,” he pouted at that last part, making Janelle's heart do a mini somersault. Since when was this man so cute?

“Or really, if you're busy right now I totally understand!” he quickly added. “I'm sure you have better things to do with your time and all but uh, let me give you my number-” he felt around in his pockets for a piece of paper, but stopped when the laugh finally escapes the now positively pink woman.

“I'm free right now. Besides, I need to get some dinner myself,” she smiled up at him and he swore he never saw a pair of eyes like that before - it was a pity she had them closed that time on stage.

“And if you were looking for your name card or something - I can totally just search you up on the staff directory, you know?”

Okay, now he just felt stupid. Smooth, Jae. Smooth. “Well yeah but- I uh, haven't updated my personal mobile number there-” he attempted to recover, receiving a quirked brow in reply.

“And why would I need that?”

“So I can ask you out again?”

The brow went even higher. “You're asking me out?”

“Ah! I meant. For lunch or dinner sometime, you know. Since we're from the same uni-”

Janelle was about to feel bashful again by what she insinuated but that feeling quickly dissipated when Jae quipped in with “and I mean, who would pass up the chance to have a meal with a smart, beautiful lady like yourself? Not to mention that voice, oof!”

The wink that followed almost rendered her knees useless. Ah, there it was. The usual confidence he had was finally recovered after that little fumble. (it was an undeniably endearing fumble, though). She cleared , trying her best not to blush too hard while clamping her lips together in an attempt to not smile at the flattery.

“Okay, Dr. Pro-Flirter. To the cafeteria?” she asked, pointing downstairs as she began to walk towards the descending steps. Jae smiled in agreement, meeting her with two short strides. “By the way,” he started, “what was that song you were singing? Cos damn, it really hit home.” Jae was about to add another flirtatious comment about her voice but she whipped her head to face him before he could, an excited glint in her eyes.

“I know, right? It’s by this band called Day6; they have a lot of rock songs and stuff too. But this one song really hits in the feels, doesn’t it? It helps motivate me when I’ve had a particularly ty day. You know, remind myself what I’m doing this for. They have another really great one called Marathon too!”

Jaehyung couldn’t help the lopsided grin that carved into his features at seeing her enthusiastically talk about this band she liked so much. “I take it you like band music, then? I’m kinda jealous, I’ve never seen someone this excited about 5Live-”

“Are you kidding?!” she quickly interjected, stepping aside as Jaehyung leaned forward to open the door to the exit. “You guys are amazing! You were the main highlight of the school festival every year, I was so sad when you didn’t perform for the festival after you graduated - i was hoping you’d still come despite already becoming alumni. It made me regret not recording any of your performances.”

He chuckled as they both continued walking. “Well, if you would just give me your number already, I could easily send you our old recordings,” he casually remarked. The junior doctor skipped a step ahead, biting on her cheek to stop herself from grinning.

“Do you really think it’s gonna be that easy to get my number?”

“Well, like a certain somebody said, I could easily search you up on the staff directory.”

“Bold of you to assume I uploaded my personal number on there.”

“Alright, alright. I give in,” Jae conceded, sighing theatrically. “Guess I’ll just invite someone else to our band practice next month. It’s not like it’s such a rare opportunity since you know, we barely even have the time to meet up much these days.”

Jae stopped walking just as Janelle did, her eyes a little wide as they stared up at him. “Will Young K be there?”

“Oh, come on! Really?” Jae was borderline exasperated, frown-pouting as he started walking again, taking larger strides so Janelle almost had to skip to keep up with his long legs.

“What?” she teased, looking at him with false innocence. “In the first place, I can’t believe people actually agreed to call him that. In the second place. Really now? Brian’s your bias?”

Janelle smirked, hopping ahead into the cafeteria, opening the glass door before Jae could get the chance to. He huffed a thank you before stepping inside, the younger doctor in tow. She stood right next to him while he surveyed the stalls, staying silent for a second while looking straight ahead.

“Well actually, my favourite’s the goofy, charismatic, unbelievably charming yet apparently pouty electric guitarist,” she stated before walking away to the fruit stall, but not before she turned to catch the amused, slightly sheepish grin that slowly devours Jae’s features.

“Who’s Dr. Pro-Flirter now!”