errorsimsry

()()()()

He’s kneeling between Jongin’s parted legs as he none too gently yanks the off his own and throws in into the trashcan beside the bed. His lets his eyes sweep over Jongin’s body before averting his eyes to meet Jongin’s lidded ones and blinks at how intently he’s being stared at.

He pauses holds Jongin’s gaze and gets trapped in the brown orbs, taking in how his lashes flutter and rest on his cheeks when he blinks and how lightly he’s biting his lower and reddened lip that Chanyeol found himself nibbling at not too long ago.

When he feels the awkward need of wanting to say anything– to just talk– he looks away when his thoughts start to stray and breathes heavily as he moves from between Jongin’s legs and sits on the edge of the bouncy bed.

He regrets that this isn’t his bedroom– regrets that he can’t order Jongin to get up and leave him to sleep his exhaustion and wariness he has growing in the pitch of his stomach the more he stays around Jongin away.

He takes a moment to catch his breath before doing the same old routine of trying to gather up his clothes and dressing himself up in peaceful silence before he can leave after wiping himself clean and tossing the dirty wipes in the trashcan.

“You’re leaving…?” Jongin’s throaty voice breaks the silence hung around them and Chanyeol grunts in response as he focuses on sloppily buttoning up his shirt. “It’s late.”

Nightfall has never really stopped him from going back home so 2 a.m. is nothing. He knows exactly what Jongin wants him to do and he’s not going to break one of his unwritten rules for him or anyone else. “Hasn’t stopped me before,” He admits with a shrug.

“You, uh, do you do this often?” Jongin stammers.

He pauses, glancing at Jongin and turning his attention back to his shirt. He’s all about ing around and losing himself in strangers because it’s easier than dealing with his own thoughts, but he doesn’t need Jongin to know any of that. “I don’t think that’s any of your business,” He says lowly and coldly. Less attentive now than he had been when he was too busy being stuck in the moment and caressing Jongin’s skin and easily forging a lover’s touch that everyone seems to crave.

Jongin stays silent, it’s obvious he wants to keep the conversation going and Chanyeol hears him shuffling about behind him before he settles himself him, stark and says just as silent. It unnerves Chanyeol in a way he fails to describe when he turns to look at Jongin’s soft brown eyes, “You’re different,” Jongin suddenly says as he inhales deeply, “From the first day I met you,”

Chanyeol doesn’t have an idea of what he’s trying to get across. Kyungsoo had said the same thing once but that was under a different circumstance– one that was very different from what this one is and Chanyeol is not having it.

“First impressions aren’t always correct.” Chanyeol stands up, pulling up his pants and barely able to hold himself up because of how exhausted he feels. His growing anger has to take a backseat because right now he wants to get out of here and go home. “I thought you’d be harder to please.” He looks down at him and he can’t read Jongin very well, but he knows his words have hurt him because of the way his shoulders tense and how his breath hitches sharply

He exhales because he isn’t going to apologise for saying exactly what he thinks. He has no ties to Jongin to try and make him feel better– and he doesn’t want to stick around here any longer than he’s required to and he has already gotten what he came here for after all.

“I surprise myself sometimes,” Jongin finally looks up and immediately shies away when Chanyeol tries to hold his gaze. This is getting annoying because yes, first impressions aren’t always right but he really wishes Jongin had the same attitude now as he did the first he met him. The attitude with more of a backbone and not this one that’s is all shy and looks like someone kicked his dog. “I’ll walk you out,” He mumbles when it’s clear to him that he’s not getting a response and Chanyeol stares at him for a moment before shaking his head.

“No,” He says because it’s unnecessary for him to do so and Jongin’s apartment has the same layout as the woman on the 6th floor– finding his way out won’t be that big of a problem. Chanyeol breathes in deeply as he turns away– his mood already sour. He steps away from Jongin and walks towards the door, he wraps his hand around the doorknob and opens the door.  

He walks down the short hallway, Jongin’s right behind him and Chanyeol feels ridiculously exposed. When he passes the living room, he doesn’t miss the figure laying on the sofa, snoring slightly– he vaguely remembers Jongin asking him to be quiet because he has a roommate.

He doesn’t recall the name and it’s not as though he is in the apartment to learn any names anyway. He grabs his satchel as he walks towards the exit, he slips his shoes on and all the while, ignoring Jongin who is trailing after him.

“Can I use your phone?” Jongin asks just before he can walk out of the apartment and Chanyeol mentally debates with himself about it. He turns around and blinks at Jongin, he has a white sheets wrapped around him and he just looks so young– it throws him off a little.

He unlocks his phone against his better judgement– the missed calls he sees from Baekhyun and his mother have him wincing– and he hands it over to Jongin.

It’s handed back to him after a few seconds and he looks at the smile Jongin is gracing him with. His hold on his phone tightens and he gives a false smile.  This is dangerous, he thinks to himself, but he doesn’t understand why he’s not turning away from this compete disaster. Maybe he needs the coming disaster because it’ll serve as the best distraction from his emotions.

“Call me whenever you like,” Jongin informs softly and wraps the white sheet around him tighter, pointing at his phone and Chanyeol finally looks away from him and stares down at the screen.

Kim Jongin. His number is listed under his name and Chanyeol swallows. , . “Alright,” He says anyway instead of saying this has to stop before you start expecting too much from me. But when has he ever worried about anyone else who isn’t Kyungsoo or his immediate family?

 ()()()()

“Baekhyun?” He calls as he steps into his house and toes his shoes off. He drops his bag by the shoe rack and continues calling out to Baekhyun. He doesn’t expect him to be awake this late, but it doesn’t surprise him when he finds Baekhyun sitting on the couch, watching something on the television and ignoring his presence.

“Baekhyun, hey,” He greets but makes no move to go near him because he’s filthy and needs to take a shower. “I’m going to clean myself up,” He gets no response and he sighs before heading for his bathroom.

Baekhyun is spread out on the couch by the time Chanyeol walks back into the room, “You know,” He begins, never looking away from the screen, “I’m seriously– seriously having a hard time understanding you,” He starts, “And I’m sick of repeating myself,”

He pushes Baekhyun’s feet off the couch and puts them on his lap when he settles down. Giving no response to Baekhyun’s words and leaning into the couch with a content sigh.

“I’m not going to bring it up anymore,” Baekhyun mumbles and Chanyeol knows it’s all a lie because he has said that before and yet, he still can’t keep his comments about Chanyeol’s lifestyle to himself. Chanyeol refuses to answer that because it isn’t a question and when he feels Baekhyun’s eyes boring into him– he turns to him, “Were you worried?” It’s random.

Baekhyun sits up and snorts, “No way!” He rolls his eyes, “I was too into my movie to care about your ty life choices,” He shrugs before narrowing his eyes at him before sighing in defeat. “Of course I was worried about you– have you not seen my missed calls?”

“Of course,” He answers and watches Baekhyun lean back onto the armrest.

“Your life would’ve been easier if you’d fallen in love with me,” It’s something he always says and it makes Chanyeol smile with a sense of longing because his mother and Yura tell him the same thing. But he and Baekhyun only work well as friends and nothing more and none of them have ever stepped out of their relationship’s comfort zone.

“I’m not into ,” He says drily and Baekhyun gives him a faint kick.

“Neither am I,” He tells him just as drily. “I met someone at Yura’s wedding so that’s completely out of the question now.” He says.

“Yeah?” Chanyeol nods in affirmation and he can’t hold back the smile that crosses his features, “What’s his name?”

“I was faced; I don’t remember,” Baekhyun throws his hands in the air before bringing them back down, “What’s his name?” And then Chanyeol understands where Baekhyun is trying to take this conversation.

He frowns and his smile drops almost immediately, “What?”

“Your recent – what’s his name? Her name?”

“Jongin,” He answers as impassively as he can and takes a deep breath– awaiting whatever it is Baekhyun wants to know.

“Is he good-looking?”

“Why?”

“Answer the question, idiot.”

“He’s just alright.” He closes his eyes and knows Jongin is more than just alright, but he doesn’t need Baekhyun to know any of that.

“Just alright?” He asks sceptically, “I hope you’re not sleeping around with just alright people.” He continues, “You’re not that good-looking, but have some standards, Chanyeol,” He’s joking, the smile on his face tells him what he needs to know and Chanyeol finds himself smiling and feels relaxed. He hasn’t felt this relaxed in a while and it's nice– just nice.

“Are you going to see him again? I thought you were going to stay over because you’re later than usual.” Chanyeol can't tell Baekhyun Jongin wasn’t his only stop. He doesn’t want a lecture.

“Who knows?” He answers with a shrug and looks away from Baekhyun’s hard gaze. He leans back into the couch, “I’m not ready,” He feels the need to add this because Baekhyun might start getting ideas. He really isn’t ready and he’s not looking for anyone to get too comfortable with– he’s not ready to let of Kyungsoo and he knows anyone else who comes along right now will always be the second choice.

“I meant what I said about how this can affect Kyungsoo when he finds out,” His best friend uses his foot to poke, hard, at his ribs.

“He doesn’t have to know.” Chanyeol swats Baekhyun’s foot away and glowers down at him. “This isn’t considered cheating and this isn’t about him,” Sometimes he wonders about the utter bull he just spouts out of his mouth.

“It isn’t cheating,” Baekhyun sighs, “Because you’re not together anymore.” He groans, “This has everything to do with Kyungsoo and you know it,”

“What do you want from me? What does everyone want from me?” He asks, annoyance growing in him and he controls his tone.

“You won’t talk any therapist seriously so that’s beyond my control," He looks at him, “Try dating again.” Baekhyun says calmly. “Finding someone else to love doesn’t mean you’re throwing away everything you built with Kyungsoo.” He pauses, “Or betraying him– or whatever senseless notion that’s running through that head of yours.”

“No.” He shakes his head in disbelief.

“Or you can stick to one booty call per however long you plan to around and not around so much with so many different people,”

“Stop talking,” He whispers.

“Good because this is tiring and I've been saying this for far too long.” He shrugs, “You’re a stubborn and your stubbornness stopped being funny years ago,” He sighs, “I’m only this patient because we’ve known each other for years.”

They sit in silence before Baekhyun swings his legs off his lap and sighs, “I called your mother when you wouldn’t pick up because I got worried,” He holds his hand up before he gets a chance to protest. “I got worried– really worried because you’ve never stayed out so late, at least not without letting any of us know about it.”

“What did you do?” Chanyeol asks grimly.

“Don’t get mad,” Baekhyun says, “I called Kyungsoo–”

“Why did you do that?” Chanyeol shouts at him. “What the did you say to him?” His heart is pounding heavily against his ribcage– he knows Baekhyun will never rat out what he does to Kyungsoo but he’s scared.

“You don’t get to yell at me, Chanyeol, I was ing worried you went and did something stupid.”

He takes a moment to just breathe– getting angry does nothing and his emotions always get out of hand when he’s mad. “Is he– how is he?” He swallows, looking intently at Baekhyun who scowls darkly at him.

“Hell if I know,” He holds his gaze, “But I’m surprised he picked up my call– he has your habit of ignoring me when I’m out of town, too.”

“I miss him,” His shoulders fall and his grits his teeth as all the anger he felt for that split second evaporate, “Jesus,” He whispers to himself.

“I’m sure he misses you the same– you were happily married once,” Baekhyun states and they fall silent again. Chanyeol’s mind is racing and he so badly wants to try calling Kyungsoo himself like he does every time, but holds himself back and folds his hands into fists that he rests on his lap because Kyungsoo has never picked up his calls.

The past drunk dials are obviously ones he doesn’t want to remember because he acted a fool and Chanyeol tries not to recall any of them. He cringes at the thought.

Baekhyun eyes his fists and sighs, throwing himself back into the couch. “I ruined the mood– your afterglow or whatever you feel after you’ve ed some poor soul, I know.” He says drily, “Thought you wanted to know, but given your–”

“I want to see him– to talk to him.” He says suddenly, “He’ll listen to you– he won't refuse.” The past failed confrontation with Kyungsoo at Yura’s wedding replays repeatedly these days, at random times.

“I won’t trick him into it.” Baekhyun looks distrustfully at him.

“You won’t have to– be honest with him about me asking for him–”

“What the hell is wrong with your phone? Do it yourself!” Baekhyun cuts him off sharply, “I don’t want to get into this or pick sides– you’re my favourite, but that means nothing in this ty situation because I care about him too.”

“Baekhyun,” Chanyeol presses him with a deep frown.

“Oh, come on, Chanyeol,” He begins as he stands up from the couch and shakes his head in disbelief, “I’m really ing tired of this– you’re not a child, not everything has to go your way,”

“You don’t understand,” He points out and he expects Baekhyun to argue about it.

“You’re right– I don’t,” Baekhyun agrees easily with a shrug, “But what happens after you talk to him? What are you looking for? Closure?”

“I want to fix us.” He finally admits it aloud and Baekhyun says nothing for a couple of seconds.

“Awfully unrealistic.” He tells him firmly but with a hint of resignation in his voice. “Don't do anything stupid if he refuses to see you,” He shoots him a dirty look before turning away and stalking off into the direction of the guestroom after muttering don’t stay up too late– it’s already 4 a.m. and Chanyeol has to work in a couple of hours; sleeping on the couch will make it easier to get up and he should get some sleep, but he doesn’t because it’s impossible to sleep now.

()()()()

Special thanks to BOTTOMNINI; you’re a jewel and thank you for introducing this fic to your readers! I’m still so flattered so thank you x ∞ ;D