Wtf....am I actually back???? I'm as shocked as you are!

THE COMEBACK WAS LIT (although my baby Chanwoo needs some more lines omg how hard can it be goddamn, at least Donghyu got more lines! They finally letting that boy shine!)

I hope you enjoy, there's some gay action in this, but NO , not yet at least ;)

WARNING: not proofread lol....and also, some people make out

Jinhwan’s leaning against Hanbin’s shoulder with his only intact hand in Jiwon’s grip and they’re watching some crap on the miniature old tv standing against the wall in the old worn house, Hanbin’s got a gun strapped to his thigh and Jiwon two on his chest; after everything that transpired they haven’t been able to relax even in the slightest. Jinhwan’s been quiet for the most part, stunned by the loss of his hand as well as the loss of their house, but he hasn’t been moping.

The house they’re in at the moment is practically in the middle of nowhere, they’ve left Busn behind them and moved out to the countryside to an old safehouse that they never thought they would have any use for. It had been in a bad state when they got there but Jinhwan had been the one to immediately start working on the house to the best of his ability, it’s still quite empty, and a little dirty. But at least it looks like someone lives there now.

Jiwon’s about to open his mouth to complain about the inaccuracy of the gun scene in whatever drama they’re watching when the door opens and Chanwoo wobbles in quickly as fast as he can, the tip of his nose is red from the cold and his cheeks a little rosy, from the cold or something else they can’t tell. His eyes seem a bit watery and his expression a bit too grave for Jinhwan’s liking. He spares them a single glance before lowering his eyes and hurrying past the tv and towards the stairs and up to his room; he has a room for himself now, but he barely uses it other than to sleep. It’s too plain and too lonely and other than the bed in the middle of the room it doesn’t look like anyone lives in it.

Jinhwan’s about to move from his squished position between the two men on the couch to go check on the younger when Junhwe throws the door open letting in another wave of cold, he closes the door quickly and practically sprints towards Yunhyeong’s and Donghyuk’s room for unknown reasons.

Barely 30 seconds later he returns together with the couple and pushes them down onto the couch and it’s a tight squeeze but they make it work just because Junhwe seems adamant on making it work. Junhwe himself moves the dishes from the small living room table in front of the couch and sits himself down in front of the others.

“Alright, listen up,” he says, and claps his hands together to get their complete attention, Jiwon mumbles a, “what the ,” but nonetheless turns his attention to the younger boy. “We need to celebrate Christmas,” it’s certainly not what they were expecting to come out and Donghyuk’s mouth falls open in shock because never, in all the years he’s known the slightly younger boy, has he ever had any interest in holidays whatsoever.

“I repeat myself,” Jiwon begins, “what the ,” Junhwe snorts and drags a hand through his bleached hair- with roots almost as big as the bleached part, he’s gonna have to fix that soon- and sighs deeply like he’s a teacher to a bunch of annoying school kids.

“You’ve never wanted to celebrate Christmas before,” Yunhyeong mumbles, still quite in shock and Junhwe throws him a glare, “well thank you, captain obvious, I’m quite aware of that,” he hisses and Yunhyeong glares right back at him before curling up to Donghyuk protectively.

Junhwe glares at them as if he’s daring them to interrupt him or even say anything again, and when no one goes to open their mouth he smiles a little bitterly before heaving a sigh and seemingly sinking into himself, very unlike the usually confident Junhwe.

“Chanwoo’s moping,” he suddenly says out of the blue and it sounded much better in his head than it does out loud because it’s not like the younger doesn’t have a reason to be moping, “um..not like he’s not allowed to or anything,” he adds a bit hesitantly and rubs at the back of his neck nervously. “What are you trying to say?” Hanbin questions with an incredulous look, it’s not like Junhwe to act so...nervous.

Junhwe throws him a quick glare for interrupting him, which is only met by a blank stare because Junhwe’s glare has zero to no effect on Hanbin, and then he clasps his hands together, “he was talking about it being Christmas tomorrow and how sad it is because Jungkook’s dead and I just think that maybe the kid deserves something, not a party or anything but...you know,” he finishes off lamely and rubs at his neck again, a nervous tick that the usually cold Junhwe wouldn’t display.

“Not that I care, or anything,” he adds just to be on the safe side, he doesn’t want to come off as too caring or soft because he’s still the cold and badass Junhwe, but the kid had looked so god damned sad that Junhwe just felt like he had to say something. It’s not like he has to take credit for it, he can just pretend he had nothing to do with it.

Hanbin takes a long look at Jinhwan whose just staring at Junhwe without saying anything and decides that it’s probably not the best time for any sort of holiday celebration, and he says just that, “I don’t think now’s a good time,” he utters while looking at Jinhwan out of the corner of his eye but when he sees how Jinhwan’s lips turn down into a small frown he wonders if he perhaps said the wrong thing. He’s about to correct himself when Jinhwan speaks, “actually,” his voice is a bit hoarse from lack of use but continues on anyway, “I think now might be the best time, we could all use a distraction,” he lifts up his injured hand and waves it and that’s more than enough of an explanation.

Donghyuk chimes in with an eager nod, “I think it’s a good idea, it’s not like we’re doing anything here except shooting at trees and sleeping,” he mutters and Yunhyeong nudges him, “we’ve done other things as well,” he adds suggestively with a quirk of his eyebrow and Junhwe pretends to gag, “I didn’t sign up for this, what the ,” he mumbles and sends them a disgusted look before standing up, “I’m leaving, don’t bother me,” and then he’s out of the room and on his way up the stairs to his own bedroom; his own very empty and lonely bedroom.

It’s quite for a while after the younger’s department, no one too sure on what to do nor say and after a few minutes the one who actually does something shocks them all, it’s Jinhwan who stands up from the couch and shakes his legs to get some life back into them; “Yunhyeong, wanna join me in the kitchen?” he doesn’t even wait for an answer before he’s exiting the room and entering the kitchen but his words hang in the air still and Yunhyeong looks at the men on the couch, “did he just-?” he doesn't even know how to speak but Jiwon pushes him off the couch quite harshly with a grin and says, “just go,” and Yunhyeong pauses for a second before nodding eagerly and practically sprinting out of the room.

There’s an awkward space in between Hanbin and Jiwon where Jinhwan sat and none of them seem too eager to close it, and on top of that, Donghyuk’s chilling in the corner of the sofa  while staring at the two of them like they’re a drama that he just can’t get enough of, “Donghyuk-ah,” Hanbin mutters warningly and Donghyuk’s eyes snap up to meet his leader’s, “uh, I’m just gonna...leave,” he mumbles more so to himself than to the other two and then there are only two people left in the room.

It’s awkward and quite tense for a while, the tv still on in the background but no one’s paying attention to it, Hanbin’s wringing his hands in his lap and Jiwon’s adjusting the gun strapped to his left side to somehow distract themselves from the suffocating silence in the room.

“So,” Hanbin breaks the silence first, as expected of the leader but his voice takes Jiwon by surprise and he jumps slightly, “we should talk, “ Hanbin continues and Jiwon nods without looking at the other man, too nervous to know what he’ll see on Hanbin’s face. Maybe anger? Or even disgust? Who knows, the man can be very unpredictable.

“We can go to my room,” Jiwon suggest casually, to hide his nervousness but if Hanbin picks up on it he doesn’t show it because he just nods in agreement and together they leave the couch and the living room to head down the corridor to Jiwon’s room, it’s straight across from Yunhyeong and Donghyuk’s room so he’s often found sleeping on the couch, not because they’re extremely loud or anything, he just prefers to sleep on the couch rather than his lonesome room.  

As soon as they’re both inside the room Jiwon closes the door quickly and turns to Hanbin who’s standing by the edge of Jiwon’s bed, he’s looking at Jiwon and if it wasn’t for the fact that Jiwon can read Hanbin like an open book he would have missed the small hesitation in the man’s eyes.

“So,” Jiwon begins and his voice cracks embarrassingly which makes his cheek flush and his frown deepen, “goddamnit,” he mumbles to himself and drags a hand through his hair in frustration, this didn’t seem so hard before but now he’d rather  be anywhere else than in his room with Hanbin.

“Hyung,” Hanbin suddenly says and Jiwon startles because it’s a rarity that Hanbin ever calls him hyung, and as Hanbin takes a step closer, Jiwon tries to back up but he hits the door and groans quietly because there’s no escaping this. He’s doomed, the younger man is either going to tell him off or say that he’s disappointed in him and Jiwon would rather take a punch than hear that. “Okay, before you say anything, it’s not my fault,” Jiwon tries but he knows it’s fruitless because it’s entirely his and only his fault that he’s in this situation, “what’s not your fault, hyung?” Hanbin presses and Jiwon grits his teeth because there’s accusation in Hanbin’s voice and he doesn’t like it, not at all.

“But can you honestly blame me?” Jiwon exclaims angrily and clenches his fists at his side, Hanbin stops, there’s barely half a meter between them and Jiwon thinks that he’s way too close for comfort. “What exactly are we talking about here?” Hanbin questions and Jiwon falters, his anger disappearing and being replaced by confusion, “you’re-” he doesn’t even know what to say, because what if he says what he’s thinking and s everything up?

“You’re in love with Jinhwan hyung,” Hanbin states factually and Jiwon’s jaw slacks in shock because Hanbin knows, granted he doesn’t know all of it but he knows, he blinks stupidly and it’s quiet for far too long, but Jiwon doesn’t know what to do, should he defend himself and punch the younger or admit to everything and accept the punch?

“It’s okay, really,” Hanbin moves even closer to Jiwon and Jiwon feels his breath get stuck in his chest, he plays with the thought of pushing the boy away and asking him to leave but he knows that Hanbin, both as his friend but also his leader, won’t let this go.

“How can it be okay?” he manages to breathe out quietly and Hanbin smiles softly at him, it’s such a weird moment and Jiwon feels like their roles are reversed, like Hanbin is his hyung, granted he’s always been good at control; which is partially why he’s the leader of iKon. But he’s also oddly comforting, in a different way from Yunhyeong or Donghyuk or even Jinhwan. It’s a strong comfort, one of few words.

“It’s okay because-” he hesitates slightly and Jiwon can see the small frown painting his forehead, “-because Jinhwan hyung likes you too,” he says and Jiwon’s pretty sure that he’s dreaming this all up. Pretty sure that he’s sleeping out on the couch in the cold living room and dreaming about something that can never be; he reaches down to his thigh to pinch himself, hard, but when nothing happens he thinks he must have been drugged and that’s why his sleep is so deep.

“This is real,” Hanbin mumbles and moves even closer so that their noses are almost touching, and this time Jiwon really does push him away, “but you’re with Jinhwan,” he says matter of factly and Hanbin nods and looks away, like he’s ashamed that he left that part out. “So I don’t see how him-” he pauses, “-liking me means anything when he obviously doesn’t like me enough to be with me, since he’s with you!” he exclaims and pushes away from the door and Hanbin to stand by the bed, he’s almost seething with anger and he doesn’t want to lash out at the younger and do something he’ll regret. And certainly not the day before Christmas.

He feels a hand settle on his shoulder and he almost wants to shrug him off, but Hanbin doesn’t deserve that, he’s only the messenger and Jiwon likes him far too much to actually hurt him emotionally, physically is another thing though.

“He’s not the only one, hyung,” Hanbin practically whispers and Jiwon turns around forcefully, already fed up with the cryptic language and he’s about to tell Hanbin to leave when Hanbin rushes forward and slams his lips onto Jiwon’s, there’s no tongue or teeth, just lips to lips and Jiwon stays completely still, not even moving a millimeter; he’s frozen in shock because it’s not that he’s never been kissed before, but he’s never been kissed by Hanbin.

They stand like that for a few seconds, lips pressed against each other and noses touching before Jiwon finally realizes what’s going and he quickly pushes Hanbin away for the umptenth time, “ we can’ do this, Jinhwan hyung-” Hanbin interrupts him with kiss and his hands move up to hold Jiwon’s face in place as he places pecks on his lips, “I’ve already talked to him, it’s okay,” he mumbles against Jiwon’s lips but everything’s moving too fast and Jiwon’s mind doesn’t have enough time to catch up on everything.

“I don’t understand-” he mumbles but when Hanbin kisses him again he doesn’t push him away, instead he kisses him back and this time it’s not just a peck. Jiwon’s own hands move from where they’re hanging limply by his sides to Hanbin’s waist and then up to his shoulders and finally they meet the leader’s jawline and he kisses him like he’s oxygen; like he can’t live without him, which he supposes is, in some ways, the truth. Hanbin deepens the kiss by tracing his tongue against Jiwon’s bottom lip and Jiwon lets out a quiet moan and opens his mouth to allow Hanbin to slip his tongue inside, they moan into each other’s mouths and Hanbin’s hands slip down Jiwon’s body to grip the hem of his t-shirt; pulling away from the kiss for just a few seconds he manages to pull the t-shirt over Jiwon’s head and it lands somewhere on the floor. Jiwon breathes deeply and leans his forehead against Hanbin’s, he’s not nervous, just shocked and more than a little confused, “this is okay,” he finds himself mumbling and Hanbin nods and nudges their noses together, “more than okay,” he answers and then he’s kissing Jiwon again, with more power but just as calm. They begin to move backward towards the bed and somewhere along the way Hanbin shed’s his shirt as well, but when they’re chest to chest and almost at the edge of the bed Jiwon pulls away, a string of saliva connecting them and Hanbin raises a brow in question.

“We should, I mean-” he’s brain feels a bit jumbled after the makeout session so he’s finding hard to come up with words which Hanbin seems to find very amusing, “I know you said that you and Jinhwan hyung have talked but...I feel like maybe we should talk all three, before doing...eh, more,” he knows he’s being a bit of a party pooper, but this isn’t a trivial topic such as which ice cream flavour they should get, this is something that will change their entire dynamic and how they interact with each other, and to be honest, it wouldn’t be fair to leave Jinhwan out of this.

Hanbin lets out a disappointed sigh and his face falls a bit but he nods nonetheless because he knows the older is right, they should talk all three, but for now, he’ll just enjoy the company of Jiwon, even if the lack of kisses is a little sad.

This is really bad.

I have no excuse.

But...I'm honestly super happy to be back and into writing again! So I hope you enjoyed this little chapter and if you have any suggestions for what you want to see from this story then perhaps you can leave a suggestion in the comments or send me privately if you feel more comfortable that way. Anyways...

I hope you have a nice day/morning/night/afternoon! <3 <3 <3

PS: the bruises on the bodies and Chanwoo an Junhwe's faces were really hard to do lol pls apprecite my effort! <3