Once Jong Kook disappeared from their view, the remaining members looked at each other. Jae Suk told them everything that happened while they let out occasional sighs of disappointment.

“Poor Jong Kook hyung,” Kwang Soo said solemnly. “He must be feeling so sad right now.” Gary nodded in agreement.

“If only he had realised his feelings for Ji Hyo before, then he might not be suffering now…” Haha added in. No one said anything afterwards. What else was there to say? It was a story of a one-sided love that left one person broken. A few minutes later, the PDs called the members back for filming. Jong Kook emerged from his trailer and took a spot between Jae Suk and Haha, avoiding all eye contact.

“Okay, we’re rolling in five, four, three, two and one!” said Myuk PD. At once the members started clapping, conversing within themselves happily. Suk Jin took a glance at Jong Kook. He easily saw through Jong Kook’s fake smile; behind that smile there was pain evident in his eyes. Unlike usual, Jong Kook wasn’t bickering with Jae Suk or getting annoyed with Kwang Soo, instead, he was looking at a wall in front of him and fiddling with his cap from time to time. Suk Jin tried to prompt Jong Kook into an argument.

“Yah, Jong Kook, did you eat ramen yesterday? Your face looks puffy,” he said. The muscle man took a second to react to his name being called.

“I know right…” Jong Kook replied. The male members and some of the crew were alarmed by the commander’s behavior. Jong Kook lacked his hot-headed and witty replies, he just seemed like he was carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders. Ji Hyo just smiled, oblivious to the weird answer Jong Kook gave, she blamed it on stress and fatigue since Jong Kook was busy those days. Jae Suk rushed to save the atmosphere.

He said brightly: “Well, that’s enough small talk; we should get on with introducing our guests.” Myuk PD cast a strange look at Jong Kook but gave consent for Jong Kook to continue anyway.

Jong Kook wasn’t listening to who the wonderful guests were. His mind was unclear, like the sky on a hazy day. Ji Hyo was dating Baek Chang Joo. Ji Hyo was dating Baek Chang Joo. He repeated that statement in his mind over and over again, ignoring the ache in his heart. Ji Hyo wasn’t his and never had been…maybe even never will be. “Jong Kook hyung,” he heard Gary call his name. “You and I are in the same team today together with Haha. It’s Kim Jong Kook and Two Kids!” At that, Jong Kook smiled a little. He was glad that there were no guests in his team; he was more comfortable with the kids. The members and guest changed into their team uniforms quickly and headed out in their respective cars.

The silence and awkwardness in the car was almost deafening. Jong Kook focused on driving solely. He stared at the road ahead, eyes unblinking and hands tensed up on the steering wheel. From the corner of his eye, he could see Haha and Gary sending hand signals and glares to each other. He ignored them.

“Hyung,” Haha coughed awkwardly. “Do you want to go out for dinner after filming tonight?” Jong Kook contemplated. It had been a while ever since he and the kids had dinner together after filming since Haha now had a family to go back to and Gary was preparing a new album. But they were only going to ask him about Ji Hyo anyway.

“I’m a little tired today,” that wasn’t a lie. He really was tired. “You guys go together, okay?” Haha sent Gary a worried look.

“Hyung, you can talk to us, you know. Don’t keep everything inside,” Gary said with genuine concern.

“I’m fine.” Jong Kook said firmly and his throat swelled shut.