_{Call Me JB Hyung : Sequel Chapter 4}

_{_____________________________________________________________________________________}

_{"Let's start with this first." JB suddenly said. He was staring at me. It made me so nervous that I looked away at the TV.}

_{"H-huh?" I said confused.}

_{The silence continued again. JB hyung didn't say anything else, but I could tell he was staring hard at me. His staring that usually makes me really nervous. JB didn't say anything, and I couldn't say anything because of suddenly being nervous.} 

_{I was confused when JB hyung suddenly grabbed my arm and pulled me down to sit earlier.}

_{I was even more confused when Jackson hyung took coco with him. It made me wonder if they planned something. When I think about it, since the beginning JB and Jackson hyung have planned a lot of things. I just got coco back and she's gone again.}

_{Jackson hyung didn't have to take coco away for JB hyung and I to just talk right? But coco leaving is not the problem Youngjae. JB hyung obviously wants to really talk about something, like Jackson hyung told us to do.}

_{I slowly glanced at JB hyung and then quickly looked away after making eye contact.}

_{What is with this hyung and staring?}

_{The silence continued for so long until JB hyung finally said something.}

_{"I've been looking at the apartments again." he said. I quickly looked at him, remembering the last time he mentioned moving in together to a new apartment.} 

_{"You really want to do this?" I asked. JB looked up at me. He looked confused for a second before he put on his usual expressionless face.}

_{"I mean...getting an apartment is expensive hyung. I don't have a lot of money right now for rent. I at least want to go to service first." I said, nervously playing with my hands and looking everywhere but at JB hyung. Suddenly I felt so embarrassed.}

_{"So what is it you want Youngjae?" JB suddenly asked. I slowly looked at him and this time he looked angry. Not confused or expressionless like he usually is, but JB hyung looked really angry. I've only seen him angry one other time before, and it was when he confessed and I thought it was a joke.}

_{"What do you mean?" I asked.}

_{"We're a couple. We are in a relationship, but you said that you don't feel comfortable sleeping on the same bed. So I started looking for a space with two rooms and now you're saying you don't want a space with two rooms? Do you know how much time I've been spending looking for a new apartment? I even asked the hyung's at the company." he said.}

_{JB hyung's sudden anger really came from no where. Just minutes ago he didn't seem this frustrated. My hands nervously started shaking.} 

_{"But I never said I felt uncomfortable. I asked you if you are uncomfortable hyung." I said, my head lowering. I didnt know he was spending so much time looking for a place because he didn't tell me.}

_{A short silence passed. I heard JB sigh and I lifted my head to look at him properly. "Sorry." he suddenly apologized. "I should have talked to you more about it."}

_{I didn't know how to reply so I just shook my head.} 

_{"Youngjae..."}

_{I continued staring at JB, my hands still nervously shaking, I don't know why. I can't always expect JB hyung to be so nice and gentle with me. I mean I'm sure he has many worries he won't tell me too, just like I have worries that I'm too nervous and afraid to talk to him about.}

_{"...earlier you said I'm yours." JB continued.}

_{I remembered when I suddenly said it in front of Jackson hyung. I don't even know where it came from but I suddenly said it myself.}

_{"Yeah." I replied.}

_{"Do you mean it?" JB suddenly asked.}

_{"Huh?" I looked at him. Such a serious expression on his face. At least he didn't look so angry anymore.} 

_{"I'm your man, so you're mine too right?" JB asked. I quickly lowered my eyes. "Wait a second, what is this suddenly?" I asked chuckling. I waited for JB hyung to laugh it off as well but he didn't. I raised my eyes once again to his serious face.}

_{"Ok." I said shaking my head. "That's true." I replied him.}

_"Huh?" 

_{"Yes. You're mine so...it goes the same way right? I am yours." I said. I could feel my fingers curling at such cheesy and embarrassing words, but I said it earlier just fine. It's just when I'm alone with JB hyung.}

_{A short silence passed.} 

_{"Ugghhh...." I started shaking as I clutched my cheeks. "Did I just say this?" I asked myself.}

_{"I kind of want to hear you say it. Jackson said you said you like me. You already know how I feel Youngjae, what do you feel? Is sleeping on the same bed uncomfortable for you because you don't like me in that way? Is calling me by my name uncomfortable because you only see me as a hyung? From the beginning I've said if you don't see me like that then tell me. If you don't, I feel like I'm forcing you Youngjae. I'm the one that always kisses you. I'm the one that makes you sleep in the same bed with me. I'm the one that is asking you to call me by my name. I'm the one forcing you."} 

_{"Wait a minute what are you taking about so suddenly?" I asked a bit loudly. "Since when have you ever forced me? Why would I let you force me?" I asked.}

_{"I'm not forcing you?" JB asked.}

_{"I said it earlier hyung. I wouldn't let a guy I didn't like kiss me. I wouldn't let any other guy kiss me don't you understand? I'm not gay Jaebum hyung. If it's not with you then who else would I do this with? What other guy would I sleep in the same bed with and use the same blanket? You're not the one forcing me hyung. I don't feel uncomfortable around you. I feel even more comfortable around you than anyone else right now. Don't suddenly think that I don't like you again." I said wide eyed.}

_{Is this what JB hyung has been thinking all this time?}

_{"Then why don't you tell me? If you don't tell me I worry about it too Youngjae. I worry that I'm really forcing you into something you don't want to do. If I am then we should stop this now while we can. If we go any further..." JB hyung stopped talking. He looked away and sighed, turning back to look at me. He looked confused again. "If we go any further I don't know if I'll be able to let you go later." he finished.}

_{It doesn't seem like it, but it seems JB hyung wants to hear stuff like that. I like you. I wonder if his past girlfriend said it to him a lot.}

_{I stared at him. All this time I've been worrying about JB hyung letting me go but I didn't think he was worrying about me letting him go.}

_{How could I let JB hyung go unless he wanted me to let him go? It's not forcing...it's because I want to be by JB hyung's side, even if nothing works out.} 

_{I looked up at JB hyung. I looked him straight in the eyes. "You don't have to do that. I will always be here hyung. I'm the one worried that I will lose you." I admitted.}

_{"Why would I let you go? I'm the one that confessed Youngjae." JB said wide eyed. He started looking angry again, and now even more frustrated.}

_{"I don't know. I've always thought that I don't want to lose you." I said.}

_{"You like me?" JB asked.}

_{I lifted my head and caught eyes with him.}

_{"I like you." I said straightforward.} 

_{"But you don't like me like how I like you." he said.} 

_{"What?" I stared at him confused.} 

_{If I didn't like you back just a little, I wouldn't be here right now hyung.}

_{"You know what couples do Youngjae. You know what I want us to do. I said it before. I won't try to hide it anymore. If you like me like I like you then I shouldn't hide it anymore. But if that's not the case then tell me now. Jackson is right. We need to talk about this more. We're both adults now." he said.}

_{Is this about that again? JB hyung really wants to try it. Doing that. Like in the video.}

_{I stared at him, thinking about what I saw in the video.} 

_{"I'm not forcing you. I'm not trying to force you. So I want to know, am I really yours? Are you mine? I like you like love Youngjae. How do you really like me?" JB hyung asked me and all I could do was stare at him.} 

_{"Love..." I mumbled shocked.} 

_{"Is is better if I say that? We've been together for three years now. I think I like you even more than like Youngjae. We've never seriously had a fight before and I think if it's you then I can spend my life with. I want to talk to you like an adult. Don't you think Jackson is right? This may be love now." JB said.}

_{Love. Such a strong word. I'm afraid.}

_{I felt my face instantly go hot. Slowly I lowered me head, rubbed my eyes and sighing out loud.}

_{I don't know. I like JB hyung but I don't know what he wants me to say right now. Is a relationship this complicated or is it just because I've never been in one? But our relationship isn't normal. We're both guys. Love...Love...It's hard for me to even say it to my parents sometimes.}

_{A hand landed on top of my head and JB hyung patted my head for a little bit. When I lifted my head again he was gone. I heard him washing dishes in the kitchen. After that he said he was going to shower. I sat in silence until the shower started and I heard the door close.}

_{"Ugh..." I moaned and laid down on the couch. "What should I say?" I asked myself.} 

_{"Hey. Youngjae."} 

_{I snapped from my thoughts and looked up at JB hyung. His hair was still a little wet. I could tell that he finished his shower.}

_{How long was I laying here thinking about what to say?}

_{"I'm going to go to sleep." he said.}

_Sleep.

_{I watched him walk into the kitchen.} 

_{Jr hyung once told me that JB hyung likes to go to sleep when he's mad.}

_{Is he really mad at me?}

_{"I'll be in the room!" JB hyung yelled. He quickly disappeared into his room without giving me a chance to even say anything rather think of something to say.} 

_{So that's it? We're not going to talk about it anymore?}

_{I didn't know how long I sat there, but soon enough I was dialing Jr hyung's number and hoping he picked up.} 

_"Hyung?"

_{There was a short silence.}

_"Youngjae?"

_{"Are you at work right now?" I asked, almost forgetting that Jr hyung works.}

_{"No. I just got home. I met with Mark earlier at his restaurant." he replied. "What's wrong?"}

_{"You think something's wrong?" I asked. "Well you haven't called me since Jaebum came back. So I think something is wrong." Jr hyung replied. I used to call him a lot when JB hyung was away. I wanted to to see what JB hyung said when they talked since I didn't get any chances to talk to him.}

_{"So what's wrong? You two finally had a proper fight?" Jr hyung asked.}

_{"How did you know?" I asked, surprised.} 

_{"Well you know you two haven't had a fight since the beginning. It's not healthy, fighting is good for the relationship." Jr hyung said laughing. "I'll guess that Jaebumie is sleeping right now." he said.}

_{"He is." I replied. JB hyung and Jr hyung know a lot about each other. I think Jr hyung knows a lot more than even JB hyung knows about himself.}

_{"I told you. When he's irritated his chin starts to move out oddly in a funny way. When he's mad he just goes to sleep. He's always said that in his sleep he won't be mad. It's a bit stupid isn't it?" Jr hyung asked.} 

_{"You know so much more about JB hyung." I said chuckling.}

_{"If you're thinking what I think you're thinking then don't. We are like brothers really. Since we've known each other so long I know all his odd characteristics. You'll know more soon." Jr hyung said.}

_{"Oh..." I said.}

_{But I wasn't thinking it.}

_{Of course I've thought about how close JB and Jr hyung are, but I've never thought they were what JB hyung and I are now.}

_{"...I'm not thinking that hyung. I just don't know what to do and you know JB hyung more than I do." I said sighing.}

_{I'm completely clueless on what to do to make JB hyung happy again.}

_{"Even so, I can't tell what he's doing when he's around you." Jr hyung suddenly said.}

_{"What?" I replied confused.} 

_{"Youngjae. You usually don't want to talk to me so much about this but today you're calling me to ask me how to not make him mad?" Jr hyung asked.}

_{"I'm clueless." I said chuckling nervously. "I've never done this before hyung. I don't know how to do this. I've done something wrong but I'm not sure what I've done. If I don't fix it JB hyung will just brush it away and it will be stuck in the air. It's not that we don't fight at all. We've had arguments, but we just leave it in the air and it keeps coming back up when we argue again. It doesn't get solved because we don't talk about it..." I paused and turned to stare at the door to JB hyung's room.}

_{"...JB hyung is always so nice to me. I think he doesn't talk about a lot of things with me because he knows it will make me nervous. Before he wouldn't even get irritated so when he suddenly got mad I didn't know what to do. Jackson hyung came by and it's like he made us talk about things we don't usually talk about. We never talk about it at all Jr hyung. I don't know what to do if we don't talk about it. I don't know how to prove to JB hyung that...that I really like him too. I tell him but it's like he doesn't believe me. He keeps saying he's forcing me. It's like he's treating me like a child or something even though I'm an adult now too. I'm learning everything with him too but I just don't know what to do if he suddenly gets angry at me. Is this what relationships are like hyung? Or is this just because I'm doing this with JB hyung?" I said lowering my head.}

_{Jr hyung sighed. "Jaebum has always had a temper." he said.}

_{"Huh?" I lifted my head up.}

_{"You can't tell now but he's always had a temper and he's worked hard to not show it. It's probably why instead of yelling he just goes to sleep or leaves it in the air. I don't think he wants to yell at you Youngjae. He'd rather ignore you than do that. You're right though, he is kind of treating you like a child. It's because he's older than you. When you two started you were still young, even though not by much. Even though he says he loves you in that way, he still sees you as a child. He still sees you with Yugyeom and BamBam and so it's making him not be able to go any further. He keeps saying he's probably forcing you and that you should get a girlfriend." Jr hyung suddenly said.}

_{"When did he say this?" I asked.}

_{Jr hyung laughed. "You call me and he comes to see me at work. Am I the counselor?" he asked.}

_{"I'm sorry." I apologized.}

_{"But I understand because I'm the only one that really knows." Jr hyung said.}

_{"Ah...Jackson hyung knows now." I said.}

_{"You two told him?" Jr hyung asked. "I told him." I replied. There was a short silence.}

_{"Jackson hyung found out, and I couldn't lie to him." I quickly said.}

_{Jr hyung laughed. "You don't have to explain to me." he said. "I was just surprised because I didn't think you wanted anyone else to know." he said.}

_{"I was afraid to let anyone else know. Don't you understand hyung?" I asked. "I do." Jr hyung replied.}

_{"Look Youngjae. I can tell you about how Jaebum hyung is when he's in a relationship but it won't help because he treats you different. I can't tell you what to do. Only you know what to do." Jr hyung said.} 

_{I laughed nervously and sighed. "I feel like I'm in one of those drama's. It feels like this since the beginning. Like this isn't real." I said.}

_{Another short silence passed.} 

_{"I'm going to go shower." Jr hyung said. "Sorry to bother you hyung. I'll see you next time. Bye." I said.}

_{"Bye." Jr hyung replied.} 

_{I hung up and put down my phone before standing up and heading towards the room.} 

_{"Hyung are you asleep?"}

_{"No." JB quickly replied.}

_{Did he hear me on the phone?}

_{"Are you still angry?" I asked. He didn't reply for a while. "I'm not angry." he finally said.}

_{I sighed and walked a little more into the room. I could barely see him but I knew JB hyung was laying down. I could see the lump on the bed.}

_{"I called Jr hyung." I finally said.}

_{"Jinyoung? Why did you call him? And you can turn on the lights and come sit. Why are you just standing in the dark?" JB asked.}

_{I hurriedly the lights and walked to the bed, sitting down. JB hyung was sleeping next to the wall where I usually sleep so I sat down at the edge of the bed facing him.} 

_{"I didn't turn them on because I didn't want to bother you." I said.}

_{JB didn't reply. He had his eyes closed and he was laying down facing the ceiling with both his hands under his head in a relaxing position.} 

_{"I'm not angry at you Youngjae." JB said. He sighed and opened his eyes. We caught eyes. "More like I'm angry at myself." he said.}

_{"Why?" I asked. If running away doesn't help then I should be more straightforward with JB hyung like he is with me. I should show him that I'm not just a child anymore, but I'm also an adult now.} 

_{"Because I yelled at you." JB said. "But you can yell at me if there's something wrong hyung. I'm not a child. I'm not going to suddenly cry. I don't easily cry." I said.}

_{"I've seen you cry once." JB said.}

_{I stared at him and chuckled lightly. "I wasn't crying. I was just sad." I said.}

_{JB hyung nodded and laughed.} 

_{"You can yell at me if something's wrong. We can fight it out and solve it. If we don't do this then we're just running away from the problem right? It's making me confused." I said.}

_{JB didn't reply.}

_{"The problem is that you think I don't like you the same way hyung. Even after all this time." I said. JB still didn't reply.}

_{I moved onto the bed so I was staring directly down at him. JB hyung stared straight back at me. I almost looked away because he has such an intense stare as usual.} 

_{"Should I kiss you?" I asked. I even surprised myself with the question. JB hyung looked so surprised that he actually broke away eye contact first.}

_{"Hey. What are you suddenly saying? What did Jinyoung tell you?" he asked me.}

_{"Jr hyung didn't tell me anything I don't know. He said he doesn't know what to tell me because you're treating me different. Is it because I'm a boy?" I asked.} 

_{"Hey." JB said.} 

_{"But I want to know JB hyung. I don't want to run away from the problem anymore. I'm not running away from you. I'm not running away from this relationship. I'm not running away from the video. I'm an adult now. I'm not running away from anything. I want to be with you hyung. If I didn't I wouldn't be here. Don't think you're the only one that wants to further this. I also want to, it's just I get really nervous. I can't touch you without getting nervous and I can't properly say my feelings without being embarrassed. Don't forget that I've never done this before hyung. I'm not like you. I don't have any experience at all. I don't know what to do sometimes. If you don't tell me what I'm doing wrong then I won't know." I said finally looking away from him. I moved back a little and laid down besides him in the same relaxing position he was in.}

_{A short silence passed.} 

_{"Maybe I should learn more. But I can only learn with you." I said.}

_{JB suddenly pulled me up by my arm and I ended up almost on top of him. His arm went around my neck and I laughed uncontrollably. "Wait-wait a second hyung. It really tickles wait-" I said laughing.}

_{JB hyung completely pulled me towards him and under his arm. Be laughed and I couldn't stop laughing too. I ended up half on top of him, my head laying on his chest.}

_{"Since when did you grow to say stuff like this?" he asked.}

_{"That's a very old man thing to say. You know hyung, you're not that much older than me." I said chuckling.} 

_"Hey."

_{I pulled myself up and looked down at JB hyung. He stared straight at me. I kissed him. He continued staring at me really surprised. Suddenly JB hyung pulled me back down before I could see more of his reaction.}

_{"See? I'm an adult now." I said. "I may be embarrassed but it's because I don't know what to do. I also want to do a lot of things with you hyung, I just don't know how to do it." I said.} 

_{JB hyung didn't reply. Another short silence passed.}

_{"Are you asleep now?" I asked. "No." he finally replied. "Ok." I said.} 

_{Another silence passed. "Uh...I can leave so you can sleep." I said.}

_{"What about the apartment?" JB suddenly asked.}

_{"I was worried that it would be uncomfortable for you to keep sleeping on the same bed with me. Speaking of that hyung you said your uncle lived here with you. Where did he sleep?" I asked.}

_{"Ah...there's that room too. I forgot about it. It's a smaller room so we just keep a lot of stuff there. It used to be my old room. My uncle left some stuff here that he couldn't take with him so the room is full of stuff." JB said. "Let's go in there tomorrow ok?" he said.}

_{I smiled and nodded. "Right now I think we should just stay here. I mean, if you want me to keep staying here I also want to stay here with you." I said. "Maybe when I get a better job we can move and become roommates hyung." I said laughing. "There's many things I also want to do with you." I said.}

_{I wasn't prepared for our positions to suddenly change again. I ended up laying down now on the bed. JB hyung moved slightly so he was hovering over me like I was only moments ago, but he didn't lay down on me. JB hyung just stared at me.} 

_{"You keep saying there's things you also want to do with me." he said.}

_{I stared up at him and chuckled. "If you teach me then I'll know what to do." I said.}

_{"Hey. Who's been teaching you this stuff?"}

_{"No one. I don't know what I'm doing too." I replied chuckling.} 

_{"My hand." JB said. I stared at him. Suddenly a cold hand touched my thighs. Even over my pants I could feel JB hyung's cold hand. I kept staring up at him, my heart beating so fast.}

_{Is this the video? Now? Am I really prepared for this? Am I mentally prepared? What am I supposed to do?}

_{I started panicking, but made sure not to show it on my face.} 

_{"It's not like we haven't touched before." JB suddenly said.}

_{He looked away.} 

_{I chuckled. "That's right hyung." I said.}

_{JB hyung is right. We have touched before. We haven't done everything but JB hyung and I touched before he went away. Even so, it's not something I'm used to yet so even thinking about it still really embarrasses me like the night JB hyung was drunk.} 

_{It's something I never got used to before JB hyung went away. That's why I still get nervous and I still don't know what to do. It's not like we did a lot of touching either. We both still kept our clothes on.} 

_{Isn't it embarrassing?} 

_{I looked up at JB hyung. He was still looking away. He doesn't show it usually but he gets really embarrassed at times too. I can't read his face a lot of times but I know when JB hyung is embarrassed. He usually can't look at me like he usually does.}

_{"Let me do it too. If I get used to it I won't be so embarrassed." I said pushing him up slightly.}

_{"All of a sudden you're so willing." JB said. He looked down at me.}

_{I looked away.}

_{"I've always been willing if it's with you hyung." I said.}

_{"Hey!" JB hyung suddenly lifted himself off of me. I watched as he sat down on the bed and leaned on the wall. "All this time, you haven't said anything. It's really like we've been living together as brothers or something." he said.}

_{I lifted myself up. "I wouldn't kiss my brother hyung. That's strange." I said looking at him and chuckling. JB hyung looked really embarrassed.}

_{"Youngjae. What we tried before I left, let's try it again." JB suddenly said.}

_{So suddenly? I guess it's alright. But I'm not really mentally prepared for anything further I think. How should I say that?}

_{I suddenly started remembering how far JB hyung and I went two years ago before he left. I think it was because he was leaving that I didn't really care if I was mentally prepared to go further with him or not.}

_{We kept our clothes on but hands...we used our hands. Mostly JB hyung's hands. I felt my face suddenly heat up after remembering again.}

_{"Ah, what am I saying? Let's just go to sleep." JB suddenly said.}

_{I watched as JB hyung suddenly climbed over me. He laid down in his usual spot and the blanket went over both of us.} 

_{"Hey! Go turn the lights off. It's really too bright in here." he said. I laughed and did as I was told, turning off the lights and quickly coming to lay back down in my usual spot.} 

_{"Isn't it too early to sleep hyung?" I asked lifting myself up to get a better look at JB hyung. He didn't reply. "Are you embarrassed hyung?" I asked. He still didn't reply.}

_{"I'm fine to do that. It's just...how do I say this?" I paused. "I don't think I'm mentally prepared for anything else yet." I said. I paused again. "What exactly am I not prepared for?" I asked myself embarrassed.}

_{"Hey! Choi Youngjae. Just go to sleep." JB said. I looked down at him. His eyes were closed.}

_"Hyung?"

_"Hm?"

_{"When you feel mad or irritated at me, please tell me." I said.} 

_{"What about when I'm jealous?" he asked. It surprised me.}

_{"Ah...that's right, JB hyung gets jealous too." I said chuckling.}

_{"Hey. Choi Youngjae. Go to sleep." JB said.}

_{I continued laughing. "Ok. How about a secret word? Or maybe a secret sign? When you're angry or jealous hyung just do the secret sign and I'll know. I'll fix it. I'll...what would I do? Should I kiss you?" I asked, chuckling.}

_{At least with kissing, I've done it so much with JB hyug that even if I'm bad at it, I don't get really embarrassed and nervous anymore.}

_{"Choi Youngjae." JB mumbled. Through the dark I could see his hands over his eyes.}

_{"What should be the secret sign hyung?" I asked, smiling down at a suddenly embarrassed JB hyung.}

_{"What about whispering?" I paused. "You sometimes whisper something to me to make me laugh. What should the word be?" I asked.}

_{"Love." JB suddenly said in English. It surprised me. My heart skipped a beat.}

_{"Ayyyyy...that's so cheesy hyung." I said laughing it off.}

_{"Hey. Choi Youngjae, I'll say it last time. Go to sleep." JB said.}

_{"Ok. Ok. Love" I said in English. "Love is our secret word."}

_{There was silence.}

_{"It's a little embarrassing for me to say but I will." I said.}

_{"Go to sleep." JB said.}

_{"But it's not even night time yet hyung." I said chuckling. He didn't reply.}

_{"Is it because you're embarrassed too?" I asked. JB continued to ignore me.}

_{"Hey. Im Jaebum!" I yelled.}

_{Even in the dark I could tell JB hyung's eyes suddenly opening. I laughed and quickly moved back towards the wall, my arms crossing over my chest. "Ah, ah sorry." I apologized.}

_{JB sighed. I stared at him, keeping my arms crossed over my chest and giggling.}

_{JB hyung suddenly stuck out his hand. I stared at it confused.}

_{"Come here." he suddenly said.}

_{"Ah...uh...hyung I'm sorry. I'm sorry." I put my hands together, bowed, and continued apologizing.}

_{"Come here Youngjae. Hurry." JB said.}

_{Chuckling nervously I moved towards him. JB hyung suddenly pulled my arms and once again I fell on top of him, but this time my hands caught me and I ended up hovering over him like he was earlier to me.} 

_{"Lay down." he said.}

_{"Hyung it's really not the time to slee-"}

_{"Hey! Hurry." JB said.} 

_{I sighed and laid down on his chest, my cheeks instantly going hot. Because of JB hyung's sleeping habit, he sometimes ends up on top of me and I've gotten used to it, but rarely have I ever laid down on top of JB hyung.}  

_{"Hyung..." I mumbled.}

_{"Don't get scared, and tell me when to stop." JB suddenly said.}

_{I remember the exact words from two years ago, but two years ago, we sat in front of each other, hugging so we didn't see our faces.}

_{"Are we...are we going to do this?" I asked nervously, closing my eyes.}

_{"Just tell me when to stop." JB hyung whispered.}

_{And without any warning, JB hyung and I tried again something we did two years ago.} 

_{_____________________________________________________________________________________}

_{I woke up first, JB hyung surprisingly sleeping next to me, and not squeezing me tight.}

_{As soon as I saw his face memories came back. It wasn't even night time but day time yesterday when JB hyung and I tried that again.}

_{My hands quickly covered my face. Even though we didn't do exactly what we did two years ago, remembering it still embarrasses me.}

_{After JB hung told me to tell him when to stop, his hands suddenly went inside my shirt and a kiss to my ear. In cartoons the characters face suddenly goes red. I could feel my face quickly go red like in the cartoons. JB hyung then told me that my ears were really red. I don't know how even through the dark he could see it.} 

_{I remember our exact words perfectly, even thought we didn't talk too much.}

_{"Hyung...your hands. So cold." I shivered.}

_{"Sorry." JB hyung replied.} 

_{His hands continued going up my back, going up my spine one by one, but JB hyung didn't kiss my ear again, instead I felt breathing on my neck.}

_{"What should I do hyung?" I remember asking. I remember I was too caught up in the moment suddenly to feel even more embarrassed then I was. My eyes closed tightly and I couldn't see JB hyung's face, making it easier for me.} 

_{"Don't do anything. Just feel my touch." JB hyung replied me in a really low voice. It sounded like he was whispering.}

_{JB hyung really said something so embarrassing yesterday. If I remember it correctly, even though I was so embarrassed, I remember all the exact words JB hyung said.} 

_{Another cold hand suddenly joined the other and I shivered. JB hyung started kissing my neck after that, and I tightened my eyes.}

_{"It tickles." I remember saying.} 

_{"Sorry." JB hyung replied with another apology. He apologized so much yesterday. He did the same thing two years ago when we first tried doing things we've never done before.}

_{Another kiss landed on my neck this time and I opened my eyes, staring at the dark.} 

_{JB hyung's hands went all over my back and sides, and even thought it tickled at first, it somehow started changing. I could feel every touch, and it all stayed there even when JB hyung stopped touching me in that spot.} 

_{It was the same feelings from two years ago.}

_{I remember I wondered if it was fair that JB hyung was the only one touching me and I couldn't to him, but when I think about it now, even if JB hyung let me up to touch him too, I think I would have been too embarrassed to do anything.}

_{Two years ago we sat facing each other, I could follow JB hyung's movements easily then. But laying down is something different, it's really more embarrasing then I would have thought it would be.}

_{JB hyung continued touching my back. His hands turned cold to hot really fast. When JB hyung suddenly started writing words and drawing pictures on my back, I remembered he did the same thing two years ago. I remember after JB hyung stopped writing on my back, I started getting used to it. I relaxed more than I was in the beginning with JB hyung's hands moving around my back slowly.}

_{It started feeling...good. Like a massage. It didn't tickle anymore.}

_{I remember almost telling JB hyung how it felt, but after realizing how embarrassing it would sound I didn't say it. Instead I closed my eyes again.} 

_{JB hyung's hands slowly stopped moving, or they started going slower, I can't really remember. I opened my eyes when hands suddenly touched the skin of my hips.} 

_{I remember freezing. I quickly remembered what JB hyung and I tried two years ago. We have done it once before. Only one time before. Though we did do a lot more of touching two years ago, there was one time JB hyung did something to me that I've only heard the other boys in my class talk about.}

_{Not even I've done it before. Yesterday I thought JB hyung and I would try it for a second time so I could start getting over being so embarrassed.}

_{"Hyung...let me do it too..." I remember saying.} 

_{"Not now." JB hyung replied.}

_"Huh?"

_{"Not now Youngjae." JB hyung said again. His hands left my hips and started rubbing my back again. I remember being confused, but I sighed at JB hyung's handson my back again and relaxed again. Soon JB hyung's hands left the inside of my shirt and he patted my back over my clothes.}

_{"I can feel your heartbeat hyung." I remember suddenly saying.}

_{"Yours is louder." JB hyung replied to me and I remember chuckling. JB hyung's heartbeat was loud yesterday night, but mine was louder. I could hear my own heartbeat. I was so embarrassed, more embarrassed than any other time I was embarrassed.}

_{"Hey, you're so heavy." JB hyung suddenly said.}

_{I managed to somehow hit his arm as I chuckled. "Then let me up." I said laughing. Instead of letting me up though, JB hyung had his arms tightly around me and he wouldn't let me go. He acted as if he was asleep and even though it wasn't the time to sleep at all, we both really did fall asleep early yesterday evening after doing that.} 

_{I remember waking up during the night to go take a shower and brush my teeth.} 

_{This is what happened the other night after Jackson hyung took coco away for JB hyung and I to talk. We ended up not talking about everything, but I think what JB hung and I did yesterday is sort of talking.} 

_{I stared at the lump on the bed and sighed.} 

_{We didn't actually do that.}

_{JB hyung moved a little and the blanket slipped from the top of his head. I spotted two familiar moles and suddenly I could remember the first time JB hyung came to our school. Our meeting was really like some drama. If I ever tell anyone how we met, they would think I'm lying.} 

_{I continued staring at JB hyung some more before I stretched and yawned and got up to get ready. When I returned from a shower JB hyung was still laying down in a lump on the bed, but he was awake doing something on his phone.}

_{I didn't say anything to him. I couldn't. I still clearly remember what happened yesterday. Even though to someone else it would be nothing, to me it was the most embarrassing. Two years ago it took me two days or so to look at JB hyung after we tried doing that once.}

_{I quickly finished getting dressed and without saying anything I headed towards the door to go find something to eat.}

_{"Hey. Choi Youngjae."}

_{I froze and my face went instantly hot and I became nervous, but I didn't want JB hyung to see I was nervous at doing something that wasn't really even considered anything and laugh at me for it.}

_"Hey."

_{I turned around and smiled. "You're awake hyung." I nervously said.}

_{JB hyung stared at me before laughing. "Come with me to go buy some things today." he said. I smiled wide. "What are you going to buy?" I asked walking up to the bed and sitting down next to him.}

_{"We need more food." JB hyung said. "More food?" I said surprised. "We have food." I said laughing.}

_{"Ice cream. Yugyeom likes ice cream and we don't have any." JB said.}

_{I stared at him, chuckling. "What? But it's so cold." I said.}

_{"Hey." JB lifted his hand to pull me into a neck hold and I laughed loudly and apologized.}

_{"Ok. Ok." I said.}

_{"I have to stop by the bank today." JB said.}

_{"Ah..." I nodded and we caught eyes and I smiled.} 

_{"Let's go look at some games too." JB said.} 

_{"Yes! Games!" I yelled in English. JB hyung just laughed and finally got up. I watched him get some things and walk out the room.} 

_{I walked out the room to go watch tv. JB hyung finished earlier than he usually finishes and we headed out to go buy...icecream. It still made me laugh.} 

_{"I haven't seen Yugyeom in a while." I said.} 

_{"Call him. Tell him to come over." JB replied. "Tell BamBam to get over here too. I haven't seen the both of them at all. They never call me." JB said.}

_{I laughed. "They never call me either. These kids." I said.}

_{"We'll find them." JB said chuckling.}

_{I laughed loudly.} 

_{JB hyung went straight to the bank at first. I didn't know what to do so I just stayed in the car and waited for him, calling both Yugyeom and BamBam but they both didn't pick up.}

_{At least BamBam sends a text saying he's in class but I didn't get a text either.} 

_{JB hyung didn't spend a lot of time in the bank like I thought he would. It's funny because I remember once Jr hyung called him mr king of banks because it seems JB hyung really likes going to the bank. I've never been with him before though.} 

_{We went straight for the grocery store when he came back. I slowly started thinking about what happened the other day with JB hyung and I. I started to think that the reason why JB hyung is taking me so many places is so I don't think so hard about the embarrassing thing we did the other day.} 

_{"I called Yugyeom and BamBam. They really didn't pick up. BamBam didn't even send me a text." I said laughing.}

_{"Really?" JB asked. I stared at him. He looked straight at the road. "Yes. Really." I replied, a little confused at his response. A little while ago it looked like he would be annoyed that the two youngest weren't picking up their phones.} 

_{"Did Yugyeom call and say he's coming over?" I asked, still a little confused about why JB hyung wanted to go buy ice cream when it's cold and Yugyeom is so busy he doesn't even come over.} 

_{"No." JB hyung just replied. I stared at him.}

_{What's with this hyung suddenly? Is he mad again?}

_{The rest of the car ride was in silence. I didn't know what else to say and JB hyung didn't say anything else either.} 

_{He really did buy some ice cream though. We stopped by the grocery market and I watched JB hyung as he even bought Jackson and BamBam's favirote ice cream. He also bought some snacks and cola. All I could do was laugh at him since he was suddenly acting strange.} 

_{He would talk to me once in a while but wouldn't even look at me. I really wondered if he was mad at me again, and if he was then what I did wrong.}

_{Or maybe JB hyung is embarrassed at what happened the other day too.} 

_{After we left the grocery store JB hyung took me to the department store saying that there are many new games that he thinks that I will like.} 

_{In the department store JB hyung suddenly asked what games I've liked recently. We looked at the games but I decided not to buy it. Soon after that JB hyung said he had to go look at something, when I tried to follow him he said he will be back soon and then disappeared.}

_{Since leaving the bank JB hyung started acting very strange.}

_{I decided to go into a music store to look at prices of pianos, then I went to look at some sleeping mats and beds. I was looking at these when I got a call from JB hyung.}

_"Hello?" 

_{"Where are you?" he asked.}

_{I looked around the store and told him the name. "I'm looking at some sleeping mats. I think it will be cheaper to get a mat then a bed." I said.}

_{"Don't worry about that there's a bed in my old room." JB said. "There's just a lot of stuff in the room."} 

_{I laughed. "Really? Can we look inside today?" I asked.}

_{"Yeah. We'll look later. Where is the store? I can't find it."} 

_{I laughed some more and walked out of the store only to bump into JB hyung.}

_{"I'm here!" I yelled.}

_{JB stared at me and laughed loudly. I noticed he was carrying a few bags but I couldn't tell what was inside.}

_{"What did you buy?" I asked.} 

_{"Nothing much." JB replied. He still wouldn't look at me.}

_{Is he really suddenly embarrassed because of yesterday? Even I'm not so embarrassed anymore.}

_{"Do you have to buy anything else? We can go now." JB said. I stared at his back and followed in silence.} 

_{JB hyung wrapped the bags up so tight that I really couldn't see anything in it. He put them away in the back seat and wouldn't tell me what he bought. My phone made a noise and I looked at it so see Yugyeom and BamBam finally replied to me saying sorry they were busy.}

_{"These two. Yugyeom and BamBam finally replied." I said chuckling.}

_{"They did?" JB asked.}

_{"Yeah..." I paused. "You're acting so strange hyung. Are you embarrassed because of yesterday?" I asked.}

_{"Yesterday? About what? Why would I be embarrassed about that? Are you embarrassed?"} 

_{I looked away. "I was before, but I'm not anymore. But you're suddenly acting strange." I replied.}

_{JB didn't reply for a while. "It's because I'm planning ways to let you win in a game I want us to play when we get back." JB said.}

_"Huh?"

_{I laughed loudly.} 

_{"That's all? What is that?" I yelled continuing to laugh loudly.}

_{"I think I'll win JB hyung. Right now I have a higher score than you." I said.} 

_{"No...ah...I think the master should pretend to lose to the lower rank sometimes. It's because I didn't want you to be sad." JB said.}

_{I continued laughing loudly. "What is that? What are you talking about?" I asked.}

_{"Hey." JB mumbled.}

_{I apologized and sighed. "I thought you were mad at me again. Mad or embarrassed." I admitted.} 

_{"I wouldn't be embarrassed because of what happened yesterday. I was worried you would be embarrassed. I tried to get your mind off of it. Did it work?"} 

_{I stared at him. He kept his eyes on the road.} 

_{"Hey. Why are you suddenly staring?" JB asked.}

_{I chuckled and turned away.}

_{"I'm worried about a lot of things Jaebum hyung." I said. "Tell me." JB said. A short silence passed and I played with my hands.} 

_{"They're stupid worries I have I think." I said.}

_{"Just tell me." JB said. I continued playing with my hands. "Don't be nervous Youngjae. Jackson is right when he says we should talk about these things." JB said.}

_{"I'm scared." my voice lowered at those words and another short silence passed.}

_{"I'm scared to talk about a lot of things with you." I finished.}

_{"Why would you be scared?" JB asked. "Hey. Choi Youngjae. Please trust me more. I'm falling in love with you." he said.}

_{My eyes went wide and I looked at JB hyung. Every time he says it it shocks me. I get so surprised.}

_{"Love." I said in English. I quickly remembered what Jackson hyung and I talked about in the car, and what the three of us talked about in the apartment.} 

_{"Love." JB hyung repeated in English.} 

_{"Love." I said again, looking at him. "Are you mad at me?"}

_"Huh?" 

_{"The secret word." I said.}

_{It took him a while but JB hyung repsonded with a laugh. "I think we should use a different word." he said.}

_{I chuckled and nodded.}

_{"Tell me what you're scared of." JB said. I noticed he was driving slower.} 

_{"A lot of things...can we wait until we get back? Maybe later." I said.} 

_{"While I'm hugging you tight? What is it Yugyeom called you again? Teddy bear?" JB asked. I hit him quicker than I ever have and looked away towards the window. JB laughed loudly.}

_{"He doesn't call me that anymore, but you're the one that still holds me tight when you sleep like I'm really a teddy bear." I said.}

_{JB hyung continued laughing.} 

_{"Chuseok is almost here." I said. "Are you going to go home?" I asked.}

_{"Are you?" JB asked. I turned to look at him. "I always go home with my parents. Every year. Why? You want to come to Mokpo this year too?" I asked chuckling.} 

_{"I haven't been in two years right?" JB asked. I nodded. "But I also haven't been to my house either." he said. "That's right. You should go this year. I'm sure your mom misses you." I said.}

_{"I want you to come with me this year, but Nora's home." JB said.}

_{I continued staring at him. "You want me to come to your house for Chuseok?" I asked. "You want me to come with you?"}

_{"But Jackson and Mark want to visit right?" JB asked. "They visited!" I yelled. JB glanced at me quickly before looking back on the road. "They came all 2 years. I think they want to come this year too. Now Mark and Jackson hyung are in the family." I said laughing. "I think they will come this year too. Unless Mark hyung is going to visit home. He said he wants to go visit LA. I want to go with him." I continued laughing.} 

_{"Jackson said for Christmas he's going back home." JB said.}

_{I laughed loudly. "He says he wants to exchange gifts. I thought it's only for couples."}

_{"Gifts?" JB asked.}

_{"He said in LA people give gifts to each other even if they're not boyfriend and girlfriend. So I'm going to get a present for Jackson and maybe Mark hyung too." I said.}

_{"How about me?" JB suddenly asked. I quickly turned to him. A smile slowly moved on my face and I laughed. "I'll get JB hyung a present too. Then I should buy everyone a present." I continued laughing.}

_{I caught his smile and it made me laugh even more. "We're home." JB suddenly said. I looked around and we were parking already. I tried to help with the bags of things JB hyung bought but he really wouldn't let me see what he bought. So I just picked up the food we bought and the ice-cream.}

_{I followed JB hyung in silence. He didn't say anything and it quickly made me nervous. I wondered if I said something wrong in the car.} 

_{"Hyung, are you mad again?" I asked.}

_{"Huh" JB didn't stop but continued walking. I followed him.} 

_{"I don't know. Since we left the bank you have been acting strange. Is..." I stopped walking. "...is it because of yesterday?" I asked.}

_{JB turned around quickly and walked up to me. With hands full of bags he managed to grab my hand full of bags. "What are you saying? Hurry and let's get inside. You're always thinking something strange." JB said.}

_{I stared at him. With hands full of bags he pulled me towards his door. I didn't even notice when instead of opening the door, JB hyung rang the doorbell.}

_{It really seemed like the other time. All of a sudden the door opened and the guys all yelled out at me.} 

_{"Yongjai!" Jackson hyung yelled loudly and pulled me inside. I almost stumbled as I tried to quickly take off my shoes. "Don't fall. Don't fall." Jackson pulled me up quickly. I stumbled more because I had bags of food in my hands.} 

_{"Everyone, 1,2,3!" Jr hyung yelled.}

_{They started singing happy birthday and all I could do was stand at the front of the door confused.} 

_{I suddenly heard coco's barks and I smiled wide and suddenly realized what was going on.}

_{But my birthday isn't for another few days.}

_{"Coco-ah! You're back! What is is this?" I quickly asked. I was so surprised. Even more surprised then the last time the guys had a surprise birthday party for me.}

_{"What is this?" I asked again. Suddenly I could feel my eyes hurting but I decided laughing would help it. I know when I'm about to cry, so I quickly tried to stop myself from crying.} 

_{What? What is this? Why am I suddenly crying?}

_{Hands circled mine again and this time the bags of food left my hands. I looked at JB hyung.He took all the bags of food and walked towards the kitchen. I continued staring at him.}

_{"Hey! Don't just stand. Come. We have so much planned for today! You're even older now." Jackson said. He put a birthday hat on my head and pulled me towards the couch. I laughed and let him pull me.}

_{They had a lot of food already on the table. They also had the TV on a singing show and it made me want to laugh.} 

_{"He's going to cry." Yugyeom said. "He always has that face before he cries."} 

_{I haven't seen Yugyeom and BamBam in so long.}

_{Without thinking I walked up to Yugyeom and BamBam and pulled them both in a hug. I tightened it even when Yugyeom tried to pull me away.} 

_{"Hey. What about us?"}

_{I lifted myself to Mark hyung holding coco and frowning. I laughed and walked up to Mark hyung and gave both him and coco a hug together.}

_{"It's coco's mama and papa. Let's take a family picture." Yugyeom suddenly said. He lifted up Jr hyung's camera and took a picture.}

_{"Hey!" I yelled. "I wasn't ready. Delete it!"} 

_{Yugyeom just laughed and shook his finger. "There's no such thing as not being ready. All pictures are chic." BamBam suddenly said.} 

_{I suddenly realized exactly what he was wearing and started laughing loudly. Ever since BamBam started college, he's been dressing up more. He always wears weird pointy bright shoes, and large jackets. He even wears sunglasses.} 

_{Compared to the BamBam I met in the beginning, this BamBam is like a model.}

_{"Take another one."}

_{I stopped laughing only to have another picture taken suddenly. "Hey! Kim Yugyeom!" I yelled.}

_{"We need memories of coco's mama and papa." Yugyeom said laughing.} 

_{"Who's the mama?" BamBam asked laughing too. Yugyeom stared at me, then he looked at Mark hyung as I lifted myself up and managed to pull Jr and Jackson hyung into a hug.}

_{I suddenly wanted to hug everyone, not embarrassed about how they would react. Jackson hyung even surprisingly pulled me into a tight hug back. "Hey! I just saw you yesterday what are you doing?" he said quickly pulling me away.}

_{"Youngjae is mama, and Mark hyung is papa." Yugyeom suddenly said.} 

_{"Mama Youngjae!" BamBam said laughing. I chuckled and walked towards the kitchen. "Hey! Hey! Where are you going?"}

_{JB hyung was putting away food. On the table I saw a birthday cake. I smiled and walked up to him. JB hyung had his back facing me so he was surprised when I hugged him.} 

_{"Thanks again hyung. You always plan this. I'm surprised again." I mumbled.} 

_{"It's your birthday soon. We need to have a party. We won't be able to have one before Chuseok." JB quickly said.}

_{"Ah...I see no more fighting."}

_{I pulled away at Jr hyung's voice. JB hyung turned around and continued putting food in the fridge.} 

_{"Why are you putting the food away?" Jr hyung asked.} 

_{"This is our food. Food for his party is over there." JB hyung replied. He pointed to bags of more sweets on the table next to the cake.}

_{I laughed.}

_{"Hey." Jr hyung tapped me on the shoulder. I turned to face him and he smiled and winked. "Something happened?" he asked. "Nothing happened!" I yelled loudly.} 

_{"Hey! What's going on?"} 

_{Jackson hyung and the rest of the guys and coco came into the kitchen. I turned away and started helping JB hyung with food when I was pulled away by Mark hyung.} 

_{"It's your birthday. Sit down. There's already some food on the table." he said pushing me back towards the couch.}

_{I laughed and let myself be pushed.} 

_{"It's party time!" Jackson yelled. It made me laugh. He always yells this at all the birthday parties we have. He says it so much I know what it means even though it's in English.} 

_{"For our not so innocent anymore Youngjae!" Jackson yelled.}

_{"Jackson hyung!" I yelled.}

_{Jackson laughed and put his arm around my shoulder and pulled me close. "We are all not so innocent anymore right? I mean now you three are adults. Even thought to me you are still the young ones!" Jackson yelled pointing at Yugyeom and BamBam.}

_{"Yeah, we're young. You guys are the old ones." Yugyeom said laughing. He high fived BamBam and I laughed loudly and pulled myself away from Jackson hyung and joined them.}

_{"First we'll start with your favorite games. What is it you want to play first Youngjae hyung." BamBam asked me. I still couldn't stop chuckling at his outfit choice. He was dressed so fancy.} 

_{"My favorite game?" I asked. "Your favorite game." BamBam said.} 

_{"Ah...." I looked around. "I know. He likes mafia right? I think you've said before that you like that game." Yugyeom said.} 

_{"Then old team vs young team!" BamBam yelled.} 

_{"What? We can't do that with spy." Yugyeom said staring at BamBam. BamBam looked confused and Yugyeom explained to him.}

_{"Ah, then Youngjae hyung is main." BamBam said. "Main? What is main?" I asked in English.} 

_{"MC. MC." BamBam said laughing.} 

_{"Idiot." Yugyeom mumbled.} 

_{"Hey! Kim Yugyeom. It's time for you to learn discipline!" Jackson hyung yelled and surprised us as he suddenly jumped on top of Yugyeom and started tickling him.}

_{I fell on the floor laughing hard. We all laughed so hard. Coco barked cutely with us.}

_{"Hey! Hey! We have neighbors." JB hyung suddenly walked into the room with my birthday cake."} 

_{Jr hyung made some space on the table and JB put the cake on it and then sat down on the couch next to Jr hyung. I stopped laughing and picked up coco for a little before she cutely barked and ran away.} 

_{"Ok. Ok. Let's play now."} 

_{"We need paper." I said. JB hyung got up and walked towards the room. He came back with paper and a pen. I took it from him and quickly started writing down roles. After that I grabbed a cup on the table and put the folded papers inside.} 

_{"You finished?" Jackson hyung asked. "Yeah." I replied.}

_{"Ok. Please pick one." I said sitting down more comfortably. I pointed the cup to everyone and everyone choose one paper.} 

_{"Ah, Jackson what are you doing? That's mean." JB hyung suddenly said. I looked towards Jackson hyung who stretched his neck to try to see Jr hyung's paper.}

_{"That's mean." I said giggling.}

_{"What?" Jackson asked.}

_{"What's this?" JB hyung and I both showed Jackson hyung the way he looked while he stretched his neck to see Jr hyung's paper.} 

_{"I wanted to lean." Jackson replied.}

_{I laughed loudly. "What?" I said.} 

_{"Ok. Ok. Let's start." Jr hyung said.} 

_{"Ready. Go." Jackson said.}

_{"Ok." I got ready "Night has arrived."}

_{Everyone lowered their heads. I smiled wide. "Who's the mafia?" I asked. From the side of my eyes I saw Jackson hyung move a little and almost laughed but saw that Jr hyung is the mafia.}

_{"Ok. Who's the doctor?" I asked. Once again, Jackson hyung moved around, but this time I also saw JB hyung moving around a little and BamBam moved his arm. In the end Yugyeom was the doctor.} 

_{"I am sleepy doctor." someone mumbled.} 

_{"Ok." I said almost laughing out loud. "I got it. Morning has arrived." I said clapping my hands.}

_{Everyone lifted their heads.}

_{"Hey. Jackson, don't use a fake." Jr hyung suddenly said. I chuckled.}

_{"Jackson hyung is like this every time." BamBam moved around and I continued laughing and clapping my hands.} 

_{"Then no one gets it." Jackson said.} 

_{"How will anyone get it if you keep moving both times?" BamBam asked.}

_{"Ok. Is there police? How many doctors are there?" Yugyeom suddenly asked.} 

_{"There's one mafia and one doctor." I replied.} 

_{"Yes. Yes." Jackson hyung said.} 

_{"Then please appeal yourself." I said. BamBam pointed at JB hyung who sat next to me. Jackson hyung sat next to JB hyung, BamBam sat next to Jackson hyung, Jr hyung sat next to BamBam, then Yugyeom, and finally Mark hyung who was holding a sleepy coco.} 

_{"Ok. Let's do this quietly." Jr hyung said putting a finger on his mouth. "Yeah. Guys the neighbors." JB said.} 

_{"Begin with JB-sshi." BamBam said.} 

_{We all looked at JB hyung. He lifted his head. "Until you can only imagine." he suddenly said.} 

_{I felt the laugh escape my mouth.}

_{"Eww!" Jackson hyung yelled.}

_{"Swag. Swag." I said laughing. "I wish I can erase that from my mind." Yugyeom said.} 

_{"Ok. Jackson-sshi." BamBam said.}

_{Jackson hyung suddenly looked nervous.}

_{"I....I am...." he kept pausing.}

_{"Ok. I'll give you another one." JB hyung suddenly said. "I am your savior."}

_{We all kept silent.} 

_{"Ah, halleluya! halleluya!" I started singing with my hands out wide and JB hyung turned towards me with a smile and started singing too. We both laughed.}

_{"Hey. This isn't a date." Jackson hyung quickly said.} 

_{"What is this? What date?" I asked laughing.}

_{"Believe in me. Amen." JB hyung said. "If you aren't the doctor and someone else is the doctor then you are noisy." Yugyeom said.}

_{"Noisy." I repeated laughing.} 

_{"I work with JB-sshi in the hospital." Jackson hyung suddenly said. "Are you a nurse?" I asked. "But I didn't say I work in a hospital." JB hyung said.}

_{"Are you not a doctor? Are you a nurse?" Jackson asked looking surprised. I laughed.}

_{"Ok. I'm a assistant. Assistant." Jackson hyung said turning to BamBam. "I give scissors and knives to Jackson hyung for his operation." BamBam said.}

_{I nodded and turned to Jr hyung. "I do many things." Jr hyung said. He smirked and crossed his arms.} 

_{"That's strange hyung." BamBam said. "I am a citizen." Yugyeom said. Jackson pointed his paper at him.}

_{"Stop it." he said.} 

_{I couldn't keep my laughter in and laughed loudly.} 

_{"How do you know if I'm lying or not?" Yugyeom asked. "You're a citizen. Of course you're a citizen. We are all citizens." Jackson said.}

_{"One more time go." Jr hyung said. "I am a citizen." Yugyeom repeated.} 

_{"Ehayyy..." BamBam whined.}

_{"Mark-sshi has a poker face on." Jr hyung said pointing at Mark hyung. "It's the scary one." Jackson and BamBam mumbled. Mark hyung just stared and patted coco on the head.} 

_{"Mark hyung, what's your role?" I asked.}

_{"He's pretending not to listen." Jackson hyung copied Mark hyung's face and Jr hyung followed.}

_{"Ok. I got it, I'm sorry." Jackson hyung suddenly said after a few seconds. I chuckled.}

_{"I don't know who I am." Mark hyung said.}

_{"Ohhhh...." we all acknowledged his answer. "It's powerful." Jackson hyung said. "Then you are just yourself?" JB hyung asked. "Where are you from?" I asked in English.}

_{"He is just himself." Yugyeom said.}

_{"Ok. Let's decide now." I said laughing. "Well Yugyeom is a little strange." Jackson hyung suddenly said. "Wait you will be in big trouble." Yugeyom said. "Isn't he a doctor?" Jr hyung asked. "I am really a doctor." Yugyeom said.} 

_{"By the way 3 people said that they are doctors." BamBam said.}

_{I laughed.}

_{"Which university hospital are you from?" I asked Yugyeom.} 

_{"I'm from Namyangju." Yugyeom replied. "Ah, is that so?" I asked laughing.} 

_{"How about for now let's kill BamBam first to make it fair." Jackson hyung suddenly said.} 

_{"Why me?" BamBam asked. We all laughed.}

_{"It's between Jackson or Yugyeom." Jr hyung said.} 

_{But it's you.}

_{"Hands up if you want to kill Jackson hyung." BamBam said raising his hand. Jackson hyung stared at him and whispered something. BamBam laughed.}

_{"I think the doctor is Jr." JB hyung suddenly said. "I don't think Jr hyung is anything." BamBam said. "Hey! Why am I nothing? How do you know?" Jr hyung asked.} 

_{I laughed with BamBam.}

_{"I think Mark is the mafia. He's so silent." Jackson hyung said. "I think it's Jackson." Mark said. He made a bed with his sweater earlier and put coco down to sleep next to him.}

_{"If she messes up your jacket I'm not washing it hyung." I said laughing, pointing to coco.}

_{Mark hyung nodded and smiled. "I think it's Jackson because he always wants to kill someone." he said. "Not everyone. I only pointed at BamBam since the beginning." Jackson said.}

_{I chuckled. "Ok. Please give your opinions." I said.}

_{"Let's choose." BamBam and Jackson said.}

_{"5, 4, 3, 2, 1!"} 

_{They all pointed at each other except JB hyung. BamBam pointed at Jackson hyung. Jackson hyung pointed at BamBam. Jr hyung pointed at Yugyeom. Mark and Yugyeom looked like they were pointing at Jackson hyung.} 

_{"Yugyeom who are you pointing at?" I asked. "Jr hyung." Yugyeom suddenly said. BamBam and Jackson hyung whispered towards each other and finally BamBam pointed towards Jr hyung.}

_{"Jr hyung has two votes." I said.}

_{"Because I am no one?" Jr hyung asked BamBam. "Did you vote? How about you? Did you decide?" Jackson asked JB hyung.}

_{"You should think carefully." I said staring at them both. "JB hyung is a doctor." BamBam said. "Why don't you pick BamBam?" Jackson hyung asked. "I want to be more serious." JB hyung replied.}

_{"Ok. 5, 4, 3, 2, 1." Jackson hyung counted down.}

_{"No. No. I need more time." JB hyung quickly said. I chuckled at them. "I gave you 5 seconds." Jackson hyung said. "Do you think it's possible in 5 seconds? Can you do it in 5 seconds?" JB hyung asked.}

_{"Why not?" Jackson hyung pointed at BamBam again. "Ok." JB hyung said.}

_{I chuckled.}

_{"Who are you pointing at Jackson hyung?" I asked.}

_{"BamBam." Jackson replied. "What? Not me. Jinyoung. Jinyoung." BamBam said.}

_{"Jr. Jr." Jackson quickly changed his mind.}

_{"What? I'm suddenly not hyung?" Jr hyung asked BamBam. BamBam laughed. "Jr hyung. It's Jr hyung." he said laughing. "Jr hyung has 3 votes."} 

_{"Wait a minute. Why are you guys choosing me?" Jr hyung asked. "Ok. Guys, let's be a bit more serious." I said.} 

_{"Because you talk too much." Yugyeom suddenly replied Jr hyung. We all laughed. I caught Yugyeom sleeping a few times but decided to leave him alone.} 

_{"You should be careful." I said.}

_{"JB-sshi is acting right now." Jackson hyung said. "It's BamBam. He keeps insisting on killing me." Jr hyung suddenly said. "We haven't even finished the first round. It's definitely Jr" Jackson hyung said.} 

_{"Jr hyung has 3 votes." BamBam said.}

_{"Hyung your opinion is no more needed." Jackson said to JB hyung. The laugh escaped me and I clapped my hands. "Just follow the trend hyung." BamBam said.}

_{"Then who is?" JB hyung asked.}

_{"Jr hyung." BamBam said. "It's Jr hyung."}

_{"You shouldn't kill me. I'm really telling you not to kill me." Jr hyung said.} 

_{"But you're already dead." JB said. "You're dead." BamBam repeated. You guys don't understand. You really shouldn't do this." Jr hyung said.}

_{"Ok. Ok. Let him give his appeal." JB hyung said. "Give us a reason." Jackson hyung said.}

_{"I know who mafia is. I know." Jr hyung said. Jackson stared at him. "Do you bet our friendship?" Jackson asked. "Yes." Jr hyung quickly replied. "He says yes so let's not kill him." Jackson suddenly said.}

_{"But this is only a game." JB replied.}

_{"Ok let's kill him." Jackson said.}

_{I chuckled.}

_{"Yugyeomie?" I mumbled, waking Yugyeom up.} 

_{Is he really so sleepy? I'll let him sleep after this.}

_{"Do you agree to kill Jr hyung?" I asked Yugyeom. He nodded, pretending he wasn't asleep, but he looked really sleepy.}

_{"Ok. The game is over." I said. Jr hyung threw his paper away and lowered his head.}

_{He chuckled and I laughed.}

_{"Is he the mafia?" they all asked. "Yes." I replied, gathering everyone's paper. Jackson hyung cheered loudly and we all laughed.} 

_{"What's the penalty?" BamBam asked.}

_{"Ok. Ok. I understand, but this is Youngjae's party. First let's do the cake." Jr hyung said.}

_{"That's right there's a cake. What is this? Rice cake?" I asked looking closer at the cake.}

_{"Rice cake birthday cake." BamBam said. "JB hyung said that you are on a diet."} 

_{"Huh?" I turned to look at JB. He looked away and shrugged.}

_{"What? You're the one that won't eat any sweets recently." he said.}

_{He noticed that?}

_{"Ah, I'm not on a diet. I'm just trying to eat less sweets. It's bad for the skin." I said laughing.}

_{"It's true, eating more organic and less sweets is good for the skin. Green tea too." Jackson hyung said.}

_{"This guy is all about organic recently." Jr hyung said laughing.}

_{"Let's just do the cake." BamBam said. He looked like he really wanted to try the rice cake.}

_{"Ok. Ok. Let's turn off the lights." Jackson said. He quickly put a candle on the cake and put fire to it. "Yugyeom! Yugyeomie, it's time to get up."} 

_{I glanced at Yugyeom as soon as the lights turned off. "I'll stay here and turn it back on." BamBam said.} 

_{"Make a wish. Then after you can choose what punishment Jr gets." Jackson said. I laughed and closed my eyes.}

_{I wish for us to always be together and for my family to live along time. Also one day I will travel the world and be successful. Also...I wish for JB hyung and I...I wish for JB hyung and I to be happy for a long time.}

_{"Blow! Blow!"}

_{I opened my eyes and blew out the candles. I didn't get a chance to react before Jackson hyung pulled me close and kissed me on the cheek suddenly.}

_{"Hyung!" I yelled.}

_{The lights and I hit Jackson hyung on the arm.}

_{"He kissed my cheek." I said laughing.} 

_{"Ok, now what's Jr's punishment. It's your birthday. You decide." Jackson said. I laughed and picked up some chopsticks to get gimbap.}

_{"Ah, JB hyung made this?" I asked.}

_{When did he make it?}

_{"How did you know?" Jr hyung asked. I chuckled. "We made some before. It tastes like the other time we made it." I said.}

_{"You two cooked? You made gimbap? So you ate gimbap without us? I see. It's okay. You two always have a date and leave us." Jackson hyung said. I grabbed his hand. "N-no." I said laughing.}

_{"What about you? You always go with BamBam to eat meat. You never take me to eat meat." Jr hyung said.} 

_{"It's started." JB said.}

_{I laughed and stood up as Jackson hyung tried to explain. Jr hyung always likes to joke with Jackson hyung.} 

_{"Yugyeomie..." I nudged Yugyeom on the shoulder and he opened his eyes. "Are you sleepy?" I asked. He nodded, not even commenting back. When Yugyeom is tired and sleepy he's always like a child. I chuckled and nodded.}

_{"Mark hyung help me?" I asked Mark hyung. He smiled and nodded. We helped Yugueom up and led him to JB hyung's room.}

_{"You want to change?" I asked. "No." Yugyeom replied. He fell on the bed and put the blanket around him. "Ok. I'll make sure to leave you some food."} 

_{Yugyeom just nodded. "Turn off the lights please."} 

_{Mark hyung and I turned to each other and laughed. "Suddenly he's like this. I've never seen this side of him." Mark said. I nodded and laughed. "When he's sleepy Yugyeom is like this usually." I said.} 

_{"What are you doing? The chicken is here!" Jackson yelled.} 

_{I laughed and ran towards the chicken.} 

_{"Coco is awake?"}

_{I sat down and coco ran to my lap. "She must be hungry." I said. "I'll get her food." Mark said.} 

_{"Where's Yugyeom?"} 

_{"He's asleep inside the room." I replied JB. "It's your birthday." Jackson said. I laughed. "It's okay." I said.}

_{"Oh yeah, what's the punishment for Jr hyung?" BamBam asked. "Punishment? I don't know. What should I say?" I asked. "Secret drink." Jackson replied.}

_{"Secret drink?" I said. Mark hyung picked up coco and put her food down. Coco quickly started eating. I laughed and caught eyes with Mark hyung who laughed too and sat down next to me.} 

_{"Youngjae. Give me gimbap."} 

_{I picked up the plate of gimbap and gave it to Mark hyung. "Here's a bowl."}

_"Huh?"

_{"Yugyeomie. Yugyeomie. For Yugyeom." Mark said. "Ah..." I laughed, remembering I promised I would save some food for Yugyeom.} 

_{"What?" I turned to face JB hyung. "Hm? Did you say something hyung?" I asked. "What about Yugyeom?" JB asked. "Ah, I promised I would save him some food. Just in case we eat it all." I said filling the bowl with food.}

_{"It's like you two are a married couple." BamBam suddenly said. "Huh?" I looked up at him. "You and Mark hyung. Yugyeom said you are coco's mom and Mark hyung is coco's dad." BamBam said.}

_{I laughed. "Why am I the mom? Mark hyung?" I turned to Mark hyung and he smiled. "I think that's good." he said. "What is that? Hyung!" I yelled hitting him on the arm.}

_{"I think that these two are the ones that act like a married couple." Jackson hung suddenly said. "They are always on a date right?" he said pointing at me and JB hyung.}

_{"What-what is this with a date?" I asked nervously chuckling.} 

_{"Ah, I know a punishment for Jr hyung. Jackson hyung said secret drink. Lemons! Should we add something else? Soy sauce?" BamBam said. "What are you talking about? What is this?" Jr hyung yelled.} 

_{"Let's do it! It's your punishment. Youngjae said we choose."}

_{"Hey! Youngjae!" Jr yelled. I chuckled. "Ah...I'll go put Yugyeom's food away." I said laughing loudly.}

_{"Hey!" Jr hyung yelled after me and I hurried and ran towards the kitchen to put Yugyeom's food away. Jackson and BamBam followed me. JB hyung and I keep lemons to mix with honey sometimes for if our throat hurts. Jackson hyung and BamBam took a lot of lemons, took some sauces and salt and left. I just laughed and watched them, putting Yugyeom's food in the fridge.}

_{"Do you want to go into the room now?"} 

_"Huh?"

_{I turned around to JB hyung.}

_{"My old room. We'll just look inside." he said.}

_{"Yes." I said smiling.} 

_{I have noticed an extra room in JB hyung's apartment, but I've never been curious enough to go inside or ask about it. Even when JB hyung was away I really didn't even notice the room.}

_{It's close to the kitchen. You can't really notice it because it's hiding between the kitchen and where the TV is. It really looks like a closet. I think that's why I never asked about it.}

_{"This is it." JB said.}

_{"Hyung, are you sure this isn't a closet?" I asked chuckling.} 

_{He laughed. "It's on the other side of the room I know, but this was my old room."} 

_{He opened the door and my eyes went wide. When JB hyung wasn't lying when he talked about putting a lot of things in the room. The room was full of stuff. There were a lot of boxes and furniture, but I did see a bed hidden under all the stuff.}

_{"Wow." I said in English.}

_{"What's going on? What are you doing?"}

_{I turned to face Jackson hyung who laughed. "So you finally see the room. It's really turned into a closet." Jackson said. I laughed. "It is a closet." I said.}

_{"We'll clean it up." JB said.}

_{"So you are really going to live together?" Jackson asked. "Huh? Hyung...aren't we already living together?" I asked. "I mean, now it's...you know." Jackson hyung winked and I stared at him I confusion.}

_{"What? It's what?" I asked looking at JB. "It's like you're really Im Youngjae." Jackson said. "Hyung!" I hit him on the shoulder and he squealed and ran away. JB hyung laughed and I followed him back to go eat.} 

_{Apparently Jr hyung already drank the lemon drink and almost threw up so he ran to the bathroom.} 

_{"So Youngjae, this year Mark and I are going to Jinhaegu for Chuseok. Jinyoung wants us to come finally. He always goes to vacation somewhere. Don't worry I've already called mom and told her." Jackson hyung suddenly said.}

_{"You called her? When did you call her?" I asked surprised. "It's because you never call her so I have to." Jackson said. "What? I do call her." I said laughing. "She wants you to call more." Jackson hyung replied.}

_{"Ah, ah..." I said nodding.} 

_{"Hey. Hey. Everyone. Let's give the present now." Jr hyung suddenly said. Jackson hyung squealed and jumped up. "I almost forgot. Youngjae hyung will be really happy." BamBam said. "Maybe he will start singing." Mark hyung said.} 

_{"Huh?" I said laughing.}

_{"Wait here. Actually close your eyes. We need something to cover his eyes."} 

_{Suddenly my eyes were covered. "What is this? What's going on?" I asked, chuckling.}

_{"This year we all put money together and got you a present." BamBam said. "What? You didn't have to." I said. "You always say that. Shh...let us talk. Though this is a present for you and it will stay here. Really it's all of our presents because we will use it too." Jackson hyung said.}

_{I laughed.}

_{What is it?}

_{"Don't cry." Jackson said. "I won't cry." I replied laughing.} 

_{"I'll count to three." he said. I nodded. Jackson started counting in English. Before I knew it the blindfold was gone and there was a piano in front of me. I think I had a funny face because suddenly Jackson hyung pulled my jaw up.}

_{"He's going to cry." BamBam said.}

_{"I'm not crying." I said. "You're shocked?" Mark asked. "He's really shocked. Look at his face." Jackson said.}

_{"Hey, stop opening your mouth so wide. Happy birthday. From us to you." JB hyung suddenly said. I looked up at him. A second later I pulled myself up and hugged him. JB hyung was surprised. I could tell because he didn't hug me back.}

_{"Hey! What about us?"}

_{I laughed and pulled away from JB hyung and went to hug Jackson hyung. Soon we were all hugging in a circle. "Where's Yugyeomie?" Jackson asked. "Let him sleep." JB replied.}

_{"Thank you guys!" I yelled.}

_{"He's really so shocked he doesn't even know what to say." BamBam said. I laughed and lowered my head. "Really. Don't cry Youngjae." Jackson hyung said. I laughed. "I'm not. I'm just surprised." I admitted. "I don't know what to say." I said.}

_{"Don't say anything. Remember what I said. I'll come use it too." Jackson hyung said. I laughed and nodded. "Thank you." I said again, suddenly embarrassed.} 

_{"It's getting late. We have a movie planned after. Jackson brought one." Jr hyung suddenly said. "BamBam, you said you two don't have a class tomorrow right? We're all staying over. Like before."} 

_{"Yugyeom is going to sleep for a long time." BamBam said.}

_{"Is it a scary movie?" I asked.} 

_{"Jackson only has scary movies, but this time he brought a old chinese movie with subtitles." Jr hyung said.}

_{"My mom sent it to me." Jackson said laughing. "She says it's good."}

_{I laughed and nodded. After we ate, we watched the movie. Right after the movie ended Yugyeom woke up and came to eat. He used the shower after and one by one we used it after him.}

_{Like old times we had a sleep over.}

_{JB hyung and I decided to sleep on the floor in front of the TV with everyone else and give the bed to Yugyeom and BamBam.}

_{With coco hidden between us, we all soon fell asleep.}

_{_____________________________________________________________________________________}

_{a/n mafia game from realgot7 s3 ep2}