_{Call Me JB Hyung : Sequel Chapter 9 Part 2}

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_{"Over here! Hi!"}

_{My head quickly lifted at the sound of a familiar language. I smiled wide at the skinny guy standing next to another guy dressed in all black.} 

_{"He looks like BamBam." I mumbled, chuckling.}

_{JB hyung laughed with me. We walked up to the two guys and I wondered who Gong Jinyoung was. The one in all black smiled at me and I smiled back.}

_{"You're Jinyoung hyung?" JB hyung suddenly asked.}

_{He's older than us?}

_{"Yeah. Jaebum?" the guy asked. I watched as JB hyung nodded.} 

_{"This is my partner." he said. I watched as he turned to face the skinny guy next to him and they smiled at each other.}

_{That's really his...boyfriend? So JB hyung wasn't lying.} 

_{The skinny guy turned to us and smiled wide. "My name is Jun. Takeda Jun." he said in Korean. I could hear the accent, but other than this, he spoke it perfectly.} 

_{I stared.} 

_{"I'm Im Jaebum." I suddenly heard JB hyung's voice so I glanced at him a little and turned back to face the two guys.} 

_{"Oh...I'm Choi Youngjae." I said nervously, bowing 90 degrees.}

_{Jun laughed loudly, and suddenly my hand was grabbed. I found myself shaking hands with him. Then with Jinyoung-sshi.}

_{"Don't be so nervous. This flower..."}

_{"Huh?" I looked down at the red rose that JB hyung gave me in the restaurant. I forgot that I was still holding it.}

_{"Oh yeah. JB hyung gave it to me." I said, realizing what exactly I said and feeling my cheeks go hot from embarrassment.} 

_{But they're like us too right? They're also in this type of relationship.}

_{"That's so sweet. You don't really do this anymore do you?" Jun turned to Jinyoung-sshi. "I didn't know you wanted flowers anymore. I'll buy you some." Jinyoung-sshi replied.}

_{I watched in amazement as they talked to each other.}

_{It's like they're married.}

_{"How about we go find somewhere to sit. We can figure out where to go. Let's stop by the bookstore okay?" Jinyoung-sshi suddenly said.}

_{I stared at him.} 

_{"Let's go to the cafe near the bookstore." Jun said. "Do you mind coffee?" he suddenly asked.}

_{"Ah...americano." I quickly replied.} 

_{"So you like it? You don't have to get anything since you just ate. It's really pretty in there though. But they're doing Valentine's Day events so there are a lot of couples." he said.} 

_{"In the restaurant too." I laughed. "There are so many couples everywhere here."} 

_{"They walk so close it's so annoying isn't it?" Jun asked.}

_{I laughed and nodded.}

_{"Come on. Let's go. My car is close." Jinyoung-sshi suddenly said.}

_{We followed him. I didn't think we would be traveling by car so I was surprised.} 

_{"So Jinyoung said that you just came back from service. Your hair is already growing back." Jinyoung-sshi suddenly said.}

_"Ah..."

_{I glanced at JB hyung and he took off his hat and played around with his hair a little before putting it back on.}

_{"I'm surprised too." he said.}

_{He's right. I didn't even notice it but now he can even run his hand through it like he always does.}

_{"When I got back it took me months for my hair to grow back. How long has it been since you got back?" Jinyoung-sshi asked.}

_{"A couple of months." JB hyung replied.}

_{"It's been 5 months. This month is the 6th month." I quickly said.}

_{Jun suddenly started laughing.} 

_{"You've been counting?" he asked.}

_{I laughed. "It's because JB hyung wouldn't let me talk to him when he was gone so I kept a calendar and marked the date. I remember exactly what day he came back." I said.}

_{"Wow." Jun said.}

_{What's so...ah...I guess it's a little strange to do this.}

_{I chuckled mervously, playing with the flower.}

_{"Why didn't you two talk?" Jinyoung-sshi suddenly asked.}

_{"It's because he said he didn't want us to get distracted. I was really busy with trying to graduate university." I laughed. "But even so...I really wanted to talk to him. JB hyung talked to everyone but m-" I quickly stopped talking as I realized I was saying too much.}

_{I've never said it to anyone, not even Jr hyung.} 

_{A short silence passed, we continued walking.}

_{"Ah...it's really pretty here!" I quickly said, trying to change the topic quickly. My heart was beating so fast from almost mentioning something that might ruin the moment.} 

_{"Did you miss him?" Jun suddenly asked.}

_{"Huh?" I almost stopped to look at him but it was so crowded and they kept walking so I hurried and tried to keep up.}

_{"Did you miss Jaebum?" Jun asked again.}

_{I glanced at JB hyung. He didn't look at me so I looked at the ground, at the flower he gave me. My heart was still beating so fast.}

_{"Just say it. Don't be so shy!" Jinyoung-sshi suddenly said.} 

_{This is fast. It's like we've known each other for a long time.}

_{"I'm not shy." I quickly said. "I already told JB hyung that I really missed him." I said.}

_{"Hey. Don't talk about me as if I'm not here." JB hyung suddenly said.}

_{I laughed nervously and apologized.} 

_{The rest of the walk to the car was in silence, but I couldn't stop my heart from beating so fast, and I couldn't stop being so nervous.} 

_{We finally reached the car and we got inside, Jinyoung-sshi and Jun in the front, and me and JB hyung in the back.}

_{"So how long have you two been together?" Jinyoung-sshi suddenly asked.} 

_{We're still talking about this?}

_{There was a short silence. I still felt nervous from what happened earlier. I caught eyes with JB hyung. He didn't have any type of expression on his face. I couldn't tell what he was thinking and I didn't know what to say so I started nervously playing with my hands.}

_{"We've been together for six years." Jun suddenly said.} 

_{"That's a long time. Wow." I said amazed. "It's like you're married." I mumbled.}

_{Jun laughed. "We've known each other since high school. I spent a year in Korea and then suddenly I met him again in college. He moved here and since then we've spent a lot of time together. We didn't start dating until a few years later though." Jun laughed. "I guess compared to you two, we're old." he said.}

_{So they are older than us.}

_{"We've been together for three years. It's just the beginning of our fourth. I spent two years away though...so I guess it's really the beginning of our second year." JB hyung suddenly said.} 

_{That's right. Since you went to service. Now I'm going to service too. But we know each other. Right?}

_{"So how was it at service? I remember they worked me hard." Jinyoung-sshi suddenly asked.}

_{He laughed.}

_{"It was ok. They work you hard but once you get used to it it's ok. They teach you a lot." JB hyung replied.} 

_{"That's right!" Jinyoung-sshi said.}

_{A short silence passed.} 

_{JB hyung sounds a little strange. I wonder if someone's wrong?}

_{"You two met at a cafe?" Jinyoung-sshi suddenly asked.} 

_{Once again I glanced at JB hyung, my heart starting to race this time. Suddenly my hand felt warm. I looked down and he was holding my hand. We caught eyes for a few seconds before I looked away. I could feel my hands already trembling.}

_{Is something wrong with me? Why do I feel so strange today?}

_{Stuff like this, even if it's just holding hands, JB hyung only does it when we are alone in the apartment. He doesn't usually do stuff like this in public. I'm used to holding hands with him, but I'm used to it when we're alone. Suddenly doing it in public makes me really nervous.} 

_{"Yeah, at a cafe." he suddenly replied Jinyoung-sshi. I could tell he was still staring at me.}  

_{I kept my head down, staring at the red rose in my other hand.} 

_{"Tell us the story Youngjae." Jun suddenly said.} 

_{"Me? Why me? Should I?" I quickly lifted my head and looked at JB hyung. He almost laughed so I smiled at his face.}

_{"It was strange for me." I mumbled.}

_{"Strange? What do you mean?" Jinyoung-sshi asked.}

_{"Well...not strange I guess...I mean...when I met JB hyung he was waiting for his girlfriend." I said.}

_{"My ex." JB hyung suddenly said.}

_{"That's right. This will all sound like a scene from a movie but I promise it really happened." I said laughing.} 

_{"Tell us! It sounds interesting." Jun said loudly.}

_{I laughed at the excitement in his voice.}

_{"JB hyung was standing in front of a cafe. He was wearing a big long black jacket. He was dressed so fancy." I chuckled. "He was holding something." I said. "What were you holding?" I asked him.}

_{"A box." JB hyung said. "It had a ring in it." he said.} 

_{"Yeah, the small red box. I wondered what was inside. I guess it was for your girlfriend right? He was just standing there, dressed in all black, blocking the front of the cafe. JB hyung was holding the red box and looking down at his phone." I said. "That day the snow was so bad and I wanted to hurry and go inside the cafe for some coffee. This was when my parents didn't like me drinking coffee so I was breaking the rules." I said laughing.}

_{"Really?" Jun asked.}

_{"My parents were a little overprotective." I said.}

_{"They were a little strict, but they just cared too much about him. They are still a little strict right?" JB hyung said.}

_{I laughed. "Maybe a little. They are letting me live with you so I don't think they are too overprotective now." I said laughing.}

_{"That's right. But it's because you're an adult now." JB hyung said. I laughed at the face he was making. He looked like he was remembering all those events that happened three years ago that have led to us being together now.} 

_{"It must have been hard then." Jinyoung-sshi suddenly said. "For you two to finally get together." he finished.} 

_{"Our parents don't know yet." JB hyung suddenly said.}

_{I stared at him.}

_{Jinyoung-sshi started laughing so I looked over at him. "Our parents don't know yet either." Jun said.} 

_{"Really?" I asked, surprised. They act as if their parents know, but I guess for a relationship like this it's really hard. You can't ever tell your parents probably.} 

_{"They know about Jun. They know that I like guys." Jinyoung-sshi said. "But they don't know that we are together. It's hard for them to understand still, so it will take a long time for them to accept. But it's okay." he said.}

_{"We love each other." Jun said.}

_{JB hyung squeezed my hand suddenly and I realized that we were still holding hands. It made my heart start beating so crazy again but I smiled and squeezed his hand back.}

_{It's really unusual for him to keep holding my hand. Usually JB hyung really doesn't touch me in public at all. But I guess lately things are changing a lot. I think JB hyung is changing a lot. Even I'm starting to feel really strange.}

_{Is it because we're not in Korea? Maybe because JB hyung has been watching strange dramas.}

_{I chuckled, hoping they didn't hear me.} 

_{"But let's not talk about us right now. Continue the story of how you two met Youngjae." Jinyoung-sshi suddenly said.}

_{"Where did I stop?" I asked myself, laughing.}

_{"You were cold and wanted to go inside the cafe." JB hyung said. I smiled at him and nodded.} 

_{"That's right." I said. "The snow was really bad. It was so cold that day and it was snowing a lot. I guess I was a little annoyed." I said laughing.}

_{"At me?" JB hyung asked.}

_{I laughed and apologized, trying to pull my hand away from his to cross over my chest like I usually do, but JB hyung didn't let go. I laughed as I stared at him. He just stared back at me.}

_{"You two haven't talked about this before?" Jinyoung-sshi asked.}

_{"I guess we never have." JB hyung said.} 

_{"We haven't." I said.}

_{"Go on. It's getting more interesting. Maybe it will be interesting for you too." Jun said, chuckling.} 

_{"Well...I guess I didn't feel well. I was surprised at even myself. I was so surprised that I said something. I regretted it as soon as I opened my mouth." I said.}

_{"Why?" Jun asked.}

_{"JB hyung was dressed in all black. He has a scary face usually and no one was saying anything and just going around him. I was surprised I said something. After I said it, I was so scared." I laughed.} 

_{A short silence passed.} 

_{"I think after I was trying to get him to move and JB hyung was ignoring me and staring at his phone...I don't remember exactly but somehow I saw what was on his phone." I said, pausing, glancing at him to make sure I could say something.}

_{"It was a message from my ex. She broke up with me. I was so focused on reading the message that when I turned to look at Youngjae I guess I moved my phone too. I knew that he read it. I knew that he saw it." JB hyung said.}

_{He did?}

_{"I was surprised. We were supposed to meet that day but suddenly she sent me a message saying she wanted to break up." JB hyung continued.} 

_{That's right. He really likes her. If she didn't break up with him they would probably be together now.}

_{"When I saw JB hyung's face I saw that he was really hurt. I wondered why he didn't go inside to warm up, but I was too scared that he would beat me up for seeing the message so I didn't go check if he was still outside." I said, smiling at the memory.} 

_{"After this I hurried and finished my coffee and went home. School was out for a few days because of the bad weather. They usually never close school besides on holidays." I said laughing.} 

_{"During that time I was looking for another job and one of my teachers recommended being a assistant at Youngjae's school." JB hyung said. "At that time I really didn't want to be at the college. I even ignored the guys for a little while." JB hyung said. We caught eyes. He stared at me again. "So I accepted it. I thought I would only be helping some of the teachers in the office but they suddenly put me in a classroom." he said.} 

_{"It was a shock. I was so surprised when JB hyung suddenly came into my class and introduced himself. I went back to school to see the same scary guy I saw in front of the cafe." I said, laughing.} 

_{"It really is like a movie." Jun laughed with me.}

_{"I don't know if JB hyung recognized me but I recognized him as soon as I saw him. I was still scared that he was going to beat me up because I saw the message on his phone." I admitted, still laughing.}

_{"That's why you were avoiding me?" JB hyung asked.}

_{"You were scary hyung." I said. He nodded, no expression on his face.} 

_{"Tell us more." Jinyoung-sshi suddenly said.} 

_{"Uh...from then JB hyung became my hyung. We became...friends?" I said, not knowing what to call us back then. JB hyung suddenly squeezed my hand again and I smiled.}

_{"We became friends...the seven of us. Me, JB hyung, Yugyeomie, Jinyoung hyung, BamBam, Jackson hyung and Mark hyung. We became like a group. We met all the time. They even helped me lie to my parents for the first time." I said, laughing.}

_{"You had to start doing things for yourself." JB hyung said.}

_{I continued laughing.}

_{"So then...how did you two start dating?" Jinyoung asked. "This is the big part of the movie that we need to know." he said laughing.} 

_{"They can tell us once we get our drinks. We're here." Jun-sshi suddenly said.} 

_{I looked up and were in front of a department store. Next to this place were small shops, and I noticed the cafe they were talking about.} 

_{"You guys go ahead to the cafe. I'll run into the book store." Jinyoung-sshi said.}

_{"I want to come." I quickly said. They all turned to me. I laughed and pulled my hand away from JB hyung to take out my camera. I lifted my camera and showed them. "I need to record it all." I said.}

_{JB hyung started laughing loudly and I watched him. He's been staring at me with no expression for the whole ride, so seeing him laugh so loudly made me suddenly calm down. I smiled at him.} 

_{Jinyoung-sshi and Jun-sshi started laughing as well.}

_{"Let's all go then." Jinyoung-sshi said.} 

_{"Jinyoung was right. He's so cute." Jun suddenly said.} 

_{"Jr hyung said something about me?" I asked. "Jr hyung?" Jun said, confused. "It's what I call Jinyoung hyung. I call Jaebum hyung JB hyung. They were friends before we met." I said.}

_{"Ah...yeah. Jinyoung has told us a lot about you and Jaebum. That's why we're here to help." Jun said, smiling wide.}

_{I smiled back, confused as I got out of the car. Suddenly a hand stopped me, holding my shoulder. I looked up at JB hyung.}

_{"You can leave that here." he pointed to the flower. I didn't realize I was still holding it.}

_{"Ah, right. I almost forgot." I said, laughing.} 

_{I heard Jun and Jinyoung-sshi laughing and carefully put the flower on my seat before getting out of the car.}

_{"Don't worry. Nothing will happen to it." Jun suddenly said.}

_{"I-I'm not." I quickly said, feeling my cheeks getting hotter.}

_{We started walking towards the large department building.} 

_{"I don't really get it hyung. What do you mean by help us? What are you going to help us with?" I quickly asked Jun, remembering what we were talking about earlier.} 

_{He turned to face JB hyung and I. We were walking behind them. "He didn't tell you?" Jun pointed towards JB hyung and I stared and shook my head no.}

_{JB hyung is keeping something from me? But that's right. Sometimes he doesn't tell me a lot of things.}

_{I frowned and slowly smiled up at Jun.}

_{"He just said that you will teach us something." I said.} 

_{"I don't really know either...what you're going to teach us. I mean...I don't know much about this." JB hyung suddenly said.}

_{I quickly turned to him. He looked a little strange.}

_{Is he nervous?}

_{Jun laughed and nodded. "Let's not talk about it today. Today we have to get to know each other and go sight seeing." he said.}

_{"Sight seeing?"} 

_{Jinyoung-sshi suddenly corrected him and Jun laughed and apologized for his Korean.} 

_{"But you're good at Korean." I said, following them.}

_{"You think so? Ever since Jinyoung suddenly came back to Japan I've been working hard to learn Korean again. After I left I didn't really study." he said, laughing.} 

_{I laughed and nodded. "Then I'll try to learn Japanese and English." I said, laughing loudly.} 

_{"English is so hard!" Jun yelled.}

_{"It is hard!" I repeated.}

_{"It will take a long time until we can speak English." he said.} 

_{"That's right. Mark hyung teaches me sometimes, but it's really confusing." I said laughing.} 

_{"We're here. I just need to buy a sightseeing magazine. You two can look in it and tell us where you want to go. There's a lot of nice places for couples." Jinyoung-sshi suddenly said.}

_{I felt my cheeks go hot.} 

_{Why does it have to be for couples? So it really is a double date. Me and JB hyung and Jinyoung-sshi and Jun. This is really embarrassing.}

_{I followed in silence. The three of us looked around the bookstore while Jinyoung-sshi bought the sightseeing magazine. After that we ended up looking through some of the other stores.}

_{JB hyung disappeared for a little while and I wondered where he was, but Jinyoung and Jun-sshi pulled me towards a music store and I got distracted. I even bought a Japanese album after listening to it.} 

_{JB hyung suddenly came back as soon as I finished paying for the album. I quickly noticed that he was holding a small bag.} 

_{"Hyung!" I yelled. "The songs are really good." I said, smiling at him. He took the album and began looking at it. "I'll listen to it when we get back." he said. "You brought the computer right?" he asked me.}

_{"I did. We can listen to it together." I said smiling.}

_{"Let's go to the cafe now. It's light outside but it will start getting dark soon." Jinyoung-sshi said.}

_{We walked to the cafe that was near the department store. We managed to find a seat far from everybody else and we ordered our drinks. They came really fast, even thought the cafe was a little crowded with other couples.} 

_{"So tell us more about how you two started dating." Jun suddenly said. I glanced at JB hyung and he was looking through the sightseeing magazine that Jinyoung-sshi bought.} 

_{"I forgot where I stopped again." I said, laughing nervously.}

_{"You were just about to tell us how you two started dating." Jun said again. I could really feel my warm cheeks. I glanced at JB hyung again, and this time we caught eyes.}

_{"Maybe I should tell this part of the movie." he suddenly said.} 

_{I laughed and nodded. He handed me the sightseeing magazine and started the story.}

_{"He's just too innocent. It's a little frustrating." he started out with.}

_{"What..." I mumbled.}

_{"Really." JB hyung said. "He's so innocent that it took me so long to actually make him believe that I was confessing. It took me a long time to believe it all too but with Youngjae...he's...he's never done this before." he said.} 

_{Should I be embarrasse? Why have I never done this before? I've never even liked any of the girls at school. I am a little strange, sis is right.}

_{I glanced at JB hyung, my heart beating fast. I've never actually heard how he felt all the time when he confessed and I didn't believe him. I know he was mad but I don't know what else he was feeling.} 

_{"Tell us." Jun suddenly got excited. I lowered my head and started drinking my iced americano.}

 _{"Should I start with where I started liking him?" JB hyung suddenly said. I quickly turned to face him and he stared at me again.}

_{I wonder when we will stop playing this game. It's happening a lot today.}

_{I felt my heart beating so fast.}

_{"He's getting shy! He's so innocent!" Jun suddenly yelled. I turned to him and he laughed. I nervously chuckled and tried to calm down my racing heart.}

_{When did JB hyung start liking me? I want to know too.} 

_{"Do you want to know?" JB hyung suddenly asked. I felt like he was asking me but I continued to keep my head down and look through the magazine in nervousness.} 

_{"There isn't actually a day. There's no time that I realized my feelings." he suddenly said.} 

_{What does that mean?}

_{"The more I got to know him, the more I talked to him and stayed around him, the more I felt strange." he continued. "I knew it was a feeling that I've felt before. The feeling you feel for someone when you like them." he stopped.} 

_{There was a short silence. I started playing with the straw in my drink.}

_{"Slowly I started getting more aware of him you know?" he suddenly said.} 

_{"His every move got your attention." Jinyoung-sshi suddenly said.}

_{"Right. At first I thought no, this feeling is because he's a little brother to me. Then I thought maybe because I think of him as a friend. Then I thought maybe he's just really close family to me, something more than a brother...but I really couldn't continue to lie to myself." JB hyung laughed and I glanced at him. He was staring straight ahead but I could tell that he wasn't looking at Jun and Jinyoung-sshi.} 

_{"I started doing all these stupid things. I thought making him realize would make my feelings not feel so burdensome. I thought my feeling were a little burdensome." he continued. "I was confused. I didn't know why I was having the same feelings I had for my ex...with Youngjae."}

_{Because I'm a guy. It really is strange. I was confused too hyung.}

_{Suddenly JB hyung turned his head and we caught eyes again. My heart was beating so fast and my leg started shaking in nervousness. I just continued drinking my drink and staring at him because I suddenly couldn't look away. He had no expression on his face, instead he looked like he was really remembering every single thing that happened.} 

_{Finally JB hyung slowly looked away after what felt like hours of us playing the staring game again. I watched him as he stared in front of him again, towards Jun and Jinyoung-sshi.} 

_{"I didn't know someone as smart as Youngjae could be so oblivious about the most obvious things I did." he suddenly said.} 

_{Jun and Jinyoung-sshi chuckled. I could only keep looking at JB hyung. He was still looking in front of him. I continued drinking my americano and staring at him, listening to everything I've been curious about since he confessed.} 

_{"When was the first time?" Jun suddenly asked. I glanced at him. "The first time you felt that the feelings you had were not of brotherly or family feelings." he asked. I quickly looked back at JB hyung.} 

_{He smiled.}

_{I caught it.} 

_{It was for only a second but I caught his smile. It seemed he really was remembering everything that happened.}

_{"Do you remember Youngjae?" he suddenly asked me. "Huh?" I quickly said, nervously pretending I was not just staring at him. I looked down at the magazine again and put the straw in my mouth.}

_{He's making me feel strange again.}

_{"It sounds stupid but it was the first time you used my full name." JB hyung suddenly said.} 

_{I quickly tried to remember what day I first used his full name. At the amusement park? At one of the birthday parties? When did I?}

_{"You told me that you were too embarrassed to say it but then you suddenly did. That night when you were helping me with my work. When we were alone at the apartment..." JB hyung paused. "Hearing your nickname sounds a certain way, but hearing someone you like say your full name so suddenly really catches you off guard." he suddenly said. "It's stupid right?" he asked.}

_{Me saying his name? Is it really much of a difference if I don't call him hyung? But it's disrespectful right?}

_{"It's not stupid." Jun suddenly said. "It's the same here. We usually don't call each other by the first name. If you you call each other by the first name then it means you're really close." he said, smiling wide.} 

_{"I remember he didn't call me by my first name for a long time." Jinyoung-sshi said. "But we don't have something like that in Korea." he said.}

_{"We don't. But I told him to call me JB hyung." JB hyung said.}

_{I stared at him.} 

_{"He's gotten used to it maybe." he said, looking at me. I quickly looked away, my heart beating so fast.} 

_{"So you decided to confess then?" Jinyoung-sshi suddenly asked. "After he used your first name?"}

_{Why are they talking as if I'm not here? Is this how JB hyung felt earlier? But I am a little quiet. Maybe I should say something. But I'm nervous. And I want to hear what JB hyung has to say. He doesn't usually tell me about this stuff. Ah...what should I do? I've been feeling so strange.}

_{"Actually I wanted to confess so much even before." JB hyung suddenly said. Once again, I glanced at him nervously. "Even when I thought the feelings I had were just family feelings, I wanted to tell Youngjae how I was feeling. I wanted to know how he felt about me. I thought I was strange. I mean, I knew about relationships like this. I knew some guys at school that were like this...but I didn't think I would ever confess to..." he stopped talking.}

_{A guy. It's becasue you're not like that hyung. You like girls. I know this. So it surprsied me too. It still surprises me. I'm a guy.}

_{"Why didn't you? Why didn't you just say it when you realized?" Jun suddenly asked.} 

_{Yeah hyung...why didn't you just tell me in the beginning? How did I feel back then anyway? In the beginning I only saw you as a hyung. I mean...I never really thought about anything like that. It's not normal right? I never even thought about girls, so of course I wouldn't think about being with a guy. When you suddenly confessed I was so confused. I'm still a little confused. But I like you hyung. If you want to know how I feel...I like you. Now it's making me feel strange.}

_{I really didn't expect to hear what JB hyung said next as I sat there thinking so hard about my feelings. I squeezed my hand tight around my drink as he started speaking.} 

_{"It's something that scared me. I thought that if it scared me so much, imagine how scared Youngjae would be. I didn't want to be the one to push him away from the group, from our friendship, because of my selfish feelings. I didn't want to scare Youngjae. I didn't want to lose hi-"}

_{"You wouldn't lose me hyung!" I yelled, surprising myself.}

_{"S-sorry." I quickly apologized and lowered my head. I didn't care if anyone was staring though.}

 _{I can't believe JB hyung really thought something like he would lose me. What was he really feeling when I didn't believe him the first time?}

_{A short silence passed.} 

_{"But you won't lose me hyung." I mumbled. I glanced at him. "I care about you a lot. Don't think that you will lose me." I lowered my head and stared at my shoes.} 

_{A hand landed on my shoulder and I lifted my head. I knew it was JB hyung's hand on my shoulder. It suddenly left though. I glanced at him again.}

_{"Should I continue?" he asked.}

_{"Yes." I found myself replying with Jun and Jinyoung-sshi.}

_{"Let's see. When did I confess Youngjae?" he suddenly asked. We caught eyes again.}

_{"Jackson hyung told me that you needed help with work. I went with you thinking that you needed my help...but it was all so suspicious and you guys always played jokes on me so..." I stopped talking.}

_{"That night I confessed to Youngjae he totally didn't believe me at all. He rejected me so hard." JB hyung said, laughing. I stared at him.}

_{I didn't reject you. Did I? What does it mean to reject someone? I just didn't believe it. I didn't say no right?}

_{"It was around the time of his high school graduation. I was so stupid to confess around that time but I really wasn't thinking much. I just really wanted him to know. Even if I was rejected I wanted him to know. I thought that if he rejected me then I could say it was a joke so I wouldn't scare him away. But when I said it was a joke he took it so seriously and for the first time I think you were mad at me right?" JB hyung suddenly asked me. We stared at each other once again.}

_{"I wasn't really mad...I was just...really confused. I didn't know why you were playing such a cruel joke on me." I replied.} 

_{"But it wasn't a joke." he said.}

_{"I know." I replied.} 

_{Another short silence passed.}

_{"It took a lot of ignoring and even scolding from the guys to finally get us talking again. I thought I needed to get it into Youngjae's mind that it was not a joke and I really have feelings for him. In the end he understood. But I think he still didn't believe me for a long time." JB hyung said.}

_{"I was confused." I repeated.}

_{"It really is like a movie." Jun suddenly said.} 

_{JB hyung laughed loudly. "Because it's Youngjae it was all so hard. I think this can really be a movie." he said. I turned to him and he took his hat off and ran his hand through his hair once before putting it back on.}

_{It's really growing.}

_{"Youngjae." I turned to the sound of my name.}

_{"Did you know all of this?" Jun suddenly asked me.}

_{"No. I didn't." I replied.} 

_{"How do you feel about it?" he asked me.} 

_{How do I feel?}

_{"I never knew." I mumbled. "I'm glad I know now." I said, lowering my head, my heart beating so fast. I could feel my hands sweating already in nervousness. I already finished my drink so I didn't know what to do.} 

_{"Hey. Here." I lifted my head and turned to JB hyung. He lifted the bag he was carrying when he came back from wherever he went at the department store. He handed me the small bag and I stared at it.} 

_{"What is it?" I asked. "A present for a present." he replied.} 

_{He pointed to the watch I got for him and I slowly smiled and opened the bag and took the black box out.} 

_{"Did you get me a watch? What is it hyung? You really didn't have to get me any-" I paused as I opened the box, staring at what was inside.} 

_{"A bracelet." I said, staring at the silver bracelet. It was just a simple silver bracelet but somehow it felt so special. I wanted to wipe my nervous sweaty hand on my pants so I didn't get it dirty.}

_{"It's a good luck charm from me." JB hyung suddenly said.} 

_{"Aw, it's so sweet. I want to produce their movie." Jun suddenly said.}

_{We laughed loudly.}

_{"Are you going to put it on?" Jun suddenly asked me.}

_{"Ah..." I looked around.} 

_{"Hey. Don't look at what anyone else thinks. It's all about you and him." Jinyoung-sshi suddenly said.} 

_{I nervously laughed and nodded, taking out the bracelet. I tried to put it on myself but couldn't.} 

_{"Come here." JB hyung suddenly said.} 

_{I felt my face go hot.} 

_{I handed him the bracelet and he helped me put it on.}

_{"Thank you." I mumbled.}

_{He smiled and I smiled back.}

_{I'm really feeling so strange today.}

_{"I have an idea. Let's go to one last place today. I know the perfect place." Jinyoung-sshi suddenly said. "But it's going to be crowded. Is that okay?" he asked.}

_{I nodded. "It's fine." JB hyung said.}

_{"Tokyo Dome City." Jinyoung-sshi suddenly said. He picked up the sightseeing magazine and started looking through it.}

_{"The lights are so pretty." Jun suddenly said. "It's really beautiful." he said. "There's a lot of shopping places around too. Plus it's free to get into! We just need passes for the rides." he said, chuckling and winking.}

_{Jinyoung-sshi showed us the page and my eyes went wide because Jun was right, it really is so pretty.} 

_{"It's an amusement park?" I asked, my eyes going wide. I suddenly really wanted to go.} 

_{"Do you want to go here?" Jun asked.}

_{"I do." I said.} 

_{"It's pretty." JB hyung said.}

_{"And cool too right?" I asked, smiling wide.} 

_{"It's going to be really crowded because of today, but it's a really nice way to end the night." Jinyoung-sshi said. "Tomorrow we can go to Tokyo Tower." he said.} 

_{I nodded and smiled wide. "I have my camera ready." I said, laughing loudly.}

_{"He's been carrying it everywhere." JB hyung mumbled.}

_{Jun and Jinyoung-sshi laughed. We started getting ready to leave. JB hyung collected our empty cups and went to throw it away. I tried to help, but he told me to sit when I tried.} 

_{When he returned we grabbed our stuff and started heading back to Jinyoung-sshi's car.}

_{"There's going to be a lot of couples so let's stay close. We can go shopping at some of the stores around the area. You like music right Youngjae?" Jun suddenly asked.} 

_{"Huh? How do you know?" I asked, surprised.} 

_{"Earlier you looked really interested at the music shop in the department store." he said. "And Jinyoung also told us. Your hyung Jinyoung."}

_{"Ah, he did? Yes. I really like the piano." I said.}

_{"He can sing too." JB hyung suddenly said. I turned to him, embarrassed.} 

_{"Not really...JB hyung can sing too." I said, laughing.} 

_{"I hope we can hear you both sing while you're here then." Jun suddenly said.} 

_{JB hyung and I caught eyes and both started laughing.}

_{The rest of the ride was in silence. It took longer than expected to arrive. The first thing I saw was the lights. We passed by many different colored lights to go park and I quickly my camera and shouted at how pretty the lights really are in person.}

_{After we parked we quickly got out of the car and started walking with the many other people towards the big sign that Jun pointed out.} 

_{Tokyo Dome City.} 

_{"They do a lot of things here. But on nights like this a lot of couples come here." Jinyoung-sshi said.}

_{"Do you like baseball?" Jun suddenly asked.}

_{"I've never played." I replied.}

_{"There's a baseball dome. It's so big." he said, pointing towards a building that was a little far away from us.} 

_{"It's really big." I said.} 

_{"They have concerts here too." JB hyung suddenly said.}

_"Really?" 

_{I turned to face him and he nodded.} 

_{"Have you been here?" I asked.}

_{"Not me, but a couple of the other dancers have been here. It's for really big concerts right?" he asked Jun.}

_{"Yeah! A lot of big names preform here." Jun replied.} 

_{"Look over there! Do you see it?" Jinyoung-sshi suddenly asked.} 

_{I looked towards where he was pointing. "The ferris wheel!" I yelled and pointed my camera towards the ferris wheel. "It's far away." I said. "It's so pretty. The lights."} 

_{"It will get better when it gets dark." Jun suddenly said.} 

_{"We can go on it later tonight. It's a ride for lovers today." Jinyoung-sshi suddenly laughed and I heard Jun laughing too.}

_{I just nervously laughed and continued to record everything around us.} 

_{"Look over there." Jun suddenly said. I turned around to see a big boat with so many different colored lights on it. I quickly zoomed in on the camera and filmed it closely.}

_{"There's also an onsen here. Have you heard of onsen?" Jun suddenly asked me. He walked close to me and grabbed my free arm.}

_{I've noticed that Jun is really touchy. He's like Jackson hyung. Even though we just met, I don't really feel strange when he grabs my arm or holds my hand so suddenly.}

_{"I saw a lot of pictures of the onsen. I want to go. You want to try it too right hyung?" I turned towards JB hyung. He nodded.}

_{"We can save that for your last night here. Did I tell you? My friend's parents own the best onsen in Japan." Jinyoung-sshi suddenly said. "It will be better there. Today there's too many people." he said.}

_{"He's right. It's really the best. I recommend it." Jun said. He smiled wide at me and I nervously smiled back at him.} 

_{"So what do you two want to do first? There a lot to do here. Should we keep walking towards the amusement park or look through the stores." Jinyoung-sshi asked.}

_{"Youngjae." JB hyung suddenly said. I caught eyes with him.} 

_{"Uh...whatever is fine." I replied, nervously.} 

_{Why is he asking me?}

_{"Then the amusement park it is!" Jun yelled. "Jaebum said that you're good at games, but today you have met your match!"} 

_{I laughed loudly and put away my camera.}

_{"Let's see who's the best then!" I yelled back.} 

_{"We'll get some food. Where should we meet you?" Jinyoung-sshi suddenly asked.} 

_{I stood there, staring at JB hyung as Jun explained where they could find us. I  didn't think we would split up so soon but Jun-sshi suddenly pulled me away. I looked over my shoulder more than once before finally being able to focus on the games.}

_{The first game we started I won. Jun would not stop complaining about it so we played again and he won. After this we decided to find another game. It was a car game. You sit in the seats and act as if you're really driving.}

_{I've played games like this before, so I could already feel the confidence. I smiled wide.} 

_{"Do you drive?" Jun suddenly asked me.}

_{"No. I want JB hyung to teach me, but first I need to go to service." I replied. I got myself ready for the game, focusing hard on the screen and the buttons to play.} 

_{"Military service?" Jun asked.}

_{"Yes. Now that JB hyung is back, it's my turn." I replied, looking at him.}

_{Jun stared at me. He smiled and I smiled back in nervousness. Since I've met him, he's always smiling.} 

_{He really reminds me of BamBam and Jackson hyung.}

_{I laughed at the thought of our fashion boy BamBam. But it seems Jun hyung isn't like BamBam when it comes to fashion.} 

_{He's wearing normal clothes.} 

_{"Hey. Why are you laughing?" Jun suddenly asked.}

_{I quickly apologized. "I'm sorry. It's just that you really remind me of someone I know. But this person thinks he's a model." I said, still laughing, remembering BamBam and how he always talks about his long legs now.}

_{"Really? Who is it?" Jun asked.}

_{"His name is BamBam. He's from Thailand. You don't look the same or anything..." I nervously laughed. "...but somehow he reminds me of you." I said.}

_{"Really? Do you have a picture?"} 

_{I quickly pulled out my phone and showed Jun a picture of BamBam wearing his bright pink shoes.}

_{"A model?" Jun asked.}

_{I laughed loudly. "He's not a model, but I think he wants to be." I said. "Look at his shoes. It shocked all of us. But BamBam is really the fashion guy. He teaches us what to wear when we ask." I said, laughing.} 

_{"I want to meet him." Jun said, laughing.}

_{"I think you will like him. He's really funny, like Jackson hyung." I said smiling.}

_{Jun looked confused again.} 

_{"I'm surprised Jr hyung hasn't told you about the guys. Jackson hyung is from Hong Kong." I quickly showed Jun the picture of all of us my mom took when JB hyung returned from service. I quickly explained a little about everyone.}

_{"You have friends from all around the world." Jun said, laughing loudly.}

_{"They are very good friends. Maybe one day I can introduce them to you...hyung." I said.}

_{"It's ok. Just call me Jun." he said.}

_{"Really?" I asked.}

_{He laughed. "It's not like that here so it's ok. I would feel uncomfortable if you call me hyung." he said. "So call me Jun. Say it." he said.}

_{"Jun." I said.} 

_{"Good." he said.} 

_{"Then I'll call you Jun-sshi." I said.}

_{He laughed and patted my shoulder. I watched him laughing so hard. It made me start laughing too.}

_{"Hey. We got some food. Are you two done? You're laughing so loudly."} 

_{We both quickly turned around to see Jinyoung-sshi and JB hyung with food.} 

_{"We're just about to play this last game to see who's the king of games." Jun said.}

_{I laughed and nodded. We both finally turned towards the game and after so much hard work on concentrating and small words of encouragement from JB hyung, I won by just a point.}

_{I yelled loudly and smiled wide.}

_{"Who's the king?" Jinyoung-sshi suddenly yelled.}

_{"I am!" I yelled laughing.}

_{"Hey!" I laughed loudly as Jun chased me around a little. I could hear Jinyoung-sshi and JB hyung laughing too.}

_{"I let you win!" Jun suddenly yelled.}

_{I continued laughing and thanked him for letting me win as he says he did. I think I won because I usually play these games a lot.}

_{"Come on. Let's find somewhere to eat." Jinyoung-sshi said.} 

_{He started walking with Jun and I caught up to JB hyung and took some of the food away from him.} 

_{"This one is good." he said, pointing towards something shaped like a fish. "Ah, we have this back home." I said, staring at it closely.} 

_{"It tastes different here." JB hyung said.} 

_{"Did you taste it already?" I asked. He nodded and handed it to me. I took it, trying to not drop anything else I was holding.} 

_{"These are good too." JB hyung said, pointing to a paper bowl full of something round.}

_{"There's so many different shapes." I said, laughing.}

_{"Careful. It's hot." JB hyung pointed towards the fish shape pastry I was about to eat. I smiled and nodded before taking a bite. My eyes went wide at the delicious taste.}

_{"It's good!" I yelled.}

_{"Which one did you get?" JB hyung asked. Suddenly he grabbed my hand towards him and looked at it.}

_{"Red bean paste." I replied.}

_{"It tastes different right?" he asked, letting my hand go. I laughed and nodded. "But it's really good." I replied, taking another bite. Even though it was so hot that it almost burned my mouth.}

_{"Let's sit here." Jinyoung-sshi pointed towards an area with small tents and seats with tables. We quickly walked towards it and put all the food down before sitting down, staring out at the many lights and many people walking around.}

_{"So you like it? It's the same as the one back home." Jinyoung-sshi suddenly said.}

_{I lifted up the fish pastry and nodded, laughing loudly. "It tastes a little different but it's really good." I replied.} 

_{"It's called Taiyaki. This one is Dango, and this is Takoyaki." Jun started naming all the food on the table. I laughed at all the odd names, but the food was really good.}

_{"Let's go look around some of the shops then. After that it's up to you two. We can walk around or go ride the ferris wheel you were filming earlier." Jinyoung-sshi suddenly said.}

_{"First finish telling us about you two." Jun said.}

_{"Huh?" I stared at him, quickly remembering what we were talking about in the cafe. It's not like I could forget something so important.} 

_{"You said you would finish telling us your story." Jun said.}

_{"They did finish telling us. Right?" Jinyoung suddenly asked. I nervously played with my hands and glanced at JB hyung. "We finished telling you all that happened. At least what we can tell you." he said.} 

_{"Then how do you feel now Youngjae?" Jun suddenly asked me.}

_{I caught eyes with him, my heart suddenly beating so fast. My hands started to tremble. I lowered my eyes at the empty paper plates and bowls on the table.}

_{"How do I feel?" I repeated.} 

_{"Are you still confused?" Jun asked.}

_{"No." I quickly replied.} 

_{"That was fast." he said. I lifted my eyes and stared at him. "Because I'm not confused anymore. I know what this is. I know JB hyung's feelings. Right now...I'm feeling a little strange. Since we came here JB hyung has been making me feel a little strange." I admitted, my heart beating so fast.}

_{"How strange?" Jun asked.}

_{"Uh..." I played with my hands some more. "I don't know how to explain it...my heart..." I stopped talking and ran a hand through my hair, copying what JB hyung usually does.} 

_{"It's embarrassing." I said.} 

_{"It's like a line from a movie!" Jun suddenly said. I lifted my head and caught eyes with him. He smiled at me and I slowly smiled back nervously and lowered my head again. "Then tell Jaebum later. Let's go shopping then." he said.}

_{I lifted my head at the both of them. Jinyoung-sshi and Jun smiled wide at me and I slowly smiled back.} 

_{"Help me with the trash." JB hyung's voice suddenly went though my ears. I  looked at him and he was putting the trash in a plastic bag. I quickly helped him.}

_{"Here's your night pass." Jinyoung-sshi suddenly gave something to Jun and I stared.}

_"Youngjae."

_{I turned towards JB hyung and he handed me the same pass. "It's for the rides." he said.} 

_{I smiled and nodded.} 

_{We started with the music store. Jun made me play the piano for him. I played a song without singing, even though he really wanted me to. I said I would only sing if JB hyung sings, but JB hyung didn't want to sing.} 

_{We stayed in the music store for a long time. I think it was my fault. I ended up talking to the owner of the store who has played the piano for so long. Jun and Jinyoung-sshi had to translate for me.}

_{After an hour of talking to the music store owner we had only a few minutes to look in other shops and buy presents for everyone back home before we decided on a ride.} 

_{"Look over at the line for the ferris wheel." Jun suddenly said.}

_{I turned towards where he was pointing and my eyes went wide at the really long line of couples. They were all holding hands and standing so close.}

_{"I think it's better if we choose something else." Jinyoung-sshi said. He started laughing and I laughed at the uncomfortable look he had on his face.} 

_{"How about that one." JB hyung pointed at a ride that didn't have such a long line.} 

_{"Tha...that one's scary isn't it?" I asked nervously, looking at the very familiar ride. It's the ride Yugyeom and BamBam always want to go on. The viking.} 

_{"It's called Super Viking Sorabune!" Jun suddenly yelled.}

_{Even the name sounds scary.}

_{"You're scared?" JB hyung suddenly asked.}

_{"I'm not scared." I said loudly, laughing nervously. "Can you ride it hyung?" I asked.} 

_{"I'll ride it." he replied.} 

_{"How about it Youngjae?" Jun suddenly asked. I stared at the three of them, all looking at me.}

_{"I guess...it's fine." I said.}

_{"Don't worry!" Jun suddenly grabbed my hand. I stared up at him. "When you get scared you can hold Jaebum's hand. I'm sure he won't mind! Right Jaebum?" he asked JB hyung.}

_{"What? What is this? It's not like I'm a child. Why do I need to hold his hand?" I asked, nervously laughing.} 

_{JB hyung was staring at me, so I made sure to look at the ground, at my shoes, at anything else.} 

_{"You can hold my hand." he suddenly said.}

_{"Good!" Jun suddenly pulled my hand towards JB hyung's hand and forcefully made us hold hands. As soon as it happened, I felt that strange feeling again in my heart.}

_{"This is nice right?" Jun asked.}

_{"We hold hands a lot of times." JB hyung suddenly said.} 

_{"Really? Well on this ride he'll need your hand more then ever." Jun suddenly winked.} 

_{Why is he like this? So embarrassing.}

_{"What are you trying Jun-sshi?" I asked, nervously laughing. JB hyung tightened his hold on my hand all of a sudden and I looked down at our hands. We usually really never do this in public at all.}

_{I thought you didn't like this stuff. In front of others...}

_{Jun just laughed.}

_{"Let's go." he said, not replying to my question.} 

_{My heart...this feeling. What is this?}

_{"What's wrong?"} 

_{I lifted my head at JB hyung's voice. "H-huh?"}

_{In the dark we caught eyes. I didn't even realize how dark it got so suddenly.}

_{"Your hands are trembling." JB hyung said. I looked down at my hand in his and nervously laughed.} 

_{"Sorry. I don't know why." I replied.}

_{"I'll let go." he said.}

_"Uh..." 

_{Before I could say anything JB hyung let go of my hand and I stared at my trembling hand. I could tell my hands were sweaty.} 

_{Am I this nervous? Just because we're holding hands in public?}

_{JB hyung didn't say anything else. I couldn't see his face so I followed a little behind him, my head lowered.} 

_{We finally reached the ride and I got prepared. We got lucky and ended up in the same row. Jinyoung-sshi sat next to Jun. I sat next to Jun, and JB hyung sat next to me.} 

_{The ride started after a while of waiting and I could feel my heart beating so fast for a new reason.} 

_{I'm scared!}

_{I glanced at JB hyung as the viking started moving slowly.}

_{Jun yelled in excitement and I pictured BamBam and wanted to laugh but I felt so scared.}

_{The ride started going fast suddenly.}

_{What do I do? What should I do? I'm really going to die!}

_{The ride went faster and faster before it suddenly stopped in the middle of the air. I quickly grabbed JB hyung's hand, squeezing tight.}

_{I yelled loudly, not being able to fake like I'm not scared anymore.} 

_{I heard Jun's scream of excitement and Jinyoung-sshi's silence, but over all of it I heard JB hyung. He didn't scream loudly, but he was making a little noise.}

_{He squeezed my hand more than once and it made me feel a little better.} 

_{I felt like the ride took a really really long time. It felt like hours before it finally stopped and all the screaming stopped.}

_{"That was so fun!" Jun yelled.}

_{"It was scary!" I yelled.}

_{He laughed and patted my shoulder.} 

_{The four of us got out of the ride.}

_{"I don't think it was so scary for you." Jun suddenly said.} 

_{"Huh? But it was so scary. My heart was beating so fast. I thought I was going to die. If I didn't hold JB hyung's hand I would have died." I said, my free hand going to my chest.}

_{"So it worked." Jun said.}

_{"What?" I asked.}

_{"Holding your boyfriend's hand." he suddenly whispered and I finally realized that I was still holding JB hyung's hand so tightly. I looked up and we caught eyes. He didn't have any expression I could read.} 

_{"It worked." I finally said. "Thank you hyung." I said, smiling.}

_{JB hyung looked surprised. He just nodded before letting my hand go.} 

_{"Did you want to do anything else today? It's getting late." Jinyoung-sshi yawned loudly and I laughed.} 

_{"You're already tired. You're so old." Jun suddenly said.}

_{"Hey! We're the same age!" Jinyoung-sshi yelled.}

_{I continued laughing as I saw Jun snickering. "So how was it today Youngjae? Did you like it?" he asked me.} 

_{"It was fun!" I yelled. "Even though I forgot to record it all." I said laughing.}

_{"Today was your Valentine's date. You can record a lot tomorrow." Jun said, smiling at me.}  

_{I felt my face go hot.}

_{Is he trying to make me embarrassed? He's like Jackson hyung now.}

_{"Should we start going back then? You must be tired." Jinyoung-sshi said.}

_{"Yes." the three of us replied.} 

_{"Let's get going."}

_{Through the crowd of people we managed to walk out of the dome city and finally towards the car. So many people were leaving so it took us a long time.}

_{"Stand here. I'll bring the car. It's easier." Jinyoung-sshi suddenly said.} 

_{We found a spot to stand and watched as Jinyoung-sshi disappeared into the large crowd of people all going in the same direction.} 

_{"So how was your day today? Was it really fun? You liked it all?" Jun suddenly asked. He looked so happy. I laughed and nodded. "It was really fun today. The restaurant was really good too hyung." I said, smiling at JB hyung.}

_{Once again he looked surprised but quickly he smiled and nodded.}

_{"I think you both really like each other." Jun suddenly said.}

_{"Huh?" I turned to him. He smiled wide at me.} 

_{"You're both very aware of each other you know that? But it seems you're both too nervous to go further then where you are now." he continued.} 

_{My heart...again...}

_{"You're always nervous Youngjae." he said. "And Jaebum doesn't want you to get scared, so he doesn't go beyond what makes you nervous right?"} 

_{I glanced at JB hyung. He had his usual expressionless face.}

_{"Is it right?" Jun asked.}

_{I lowered my head, playing with my hands in nervousness. Suddenly my hand was grabbed. I looked up at Jun.}

_{"Don't be embarrassed around him. He's your boyfriend Youngjae. You said you understand it now right? You're not confused anymore right? So don't be so nervous." Jun whispered to me. I pulled my hand away and nervously chuckled, my heart beating so fast that I didn't know what to do but stare at the ground.}

_{He's been doing this all day. What is going on?}

_{"Are you nervous around Jaebum Youngjae?" Jun suddenly asked.}

_{"I-I'm not really..." I lied.} 

_{I just don't want JB hyung to think that I'm scared of him or anything, because I'm not. It's not him that I'm scared of. Why is Jun hyung doing this?}

_{"Then let's end the night with a kiss." Jun suddenly said.}

_{"A..ki...what?" I almost yelled.} 

_{"Come on." he said. "You said you're not nervous right? It's the end of the night on Valentine's day. The air is good. The date was good. It's time to end the night with a kiss." Jun said.} 

_{"H-Here? K-k-kissing?" I quickly asked.} 

_"Yes."

_{"Not here." JB hyung suddenly said.} 

 _{I quickly turned towards him, a smile wanting to come on my face. I wanted to thank him.} 

_{"You're right. The car is better. More privacy." Jun suddenly said.}

_{I turned away from JB hyung to look at him.}

_{He really wants us to do it? It's not that I don't want to do it. I know what Valentine's Day is supposed to be for couples. But in front of people? I can't do it.}

_{"Don't worry. We won't look. So do it in the car." Jun said.} 

_{"W-what? But why?" I asked.}

_{He stared at me, his smile suddenly gone for a few seconds before it returned quickly.}

_{"Because you like Jaebum, and it's the night of Valentine's Day. Show him you like him Youngjae." he said.} 

_{"Ah...ah..." my hands were quickly getting wet.}

_"Uh..." 

_{"Don't be so nervous."} 

_{"It's fine." JB hyung suddenly said.} 

_{I didn't know what to say or what to do so I lowered my head and stared at the ground.}

_{It's not really about the kiss at all. It's not even that I'm really nervous to kiss JB hyung. It's that I have never thought of doing something like kissing in front of others. Even if it's in the car, it will be in public!} 

_{We stood in silence after this. It took a long time for Jinyoung-sshi to arrive. The three of us got in the car and I listened as JB hyung showed Jinyoung-sshi the directions to our hotel.}

_{With the rose in my hand once again I stared at it, thinking of what Jun hyung has been saying all day, of what he said just a few minutes ago. My eyes slowly went to the silver bracelet that JB hyung gave me.}

_{I'm really too nervous around JB hyung all the time. But I can't help it. He makes me feel strange. But I can't just suddenly kiss him. I don't know how to kiss still and...I don't want them to see.}

_{I glanced at him then at Jinyoung-sshi and Jun. JB hyung finished giving the directions and sat back.}

_{I watched him for a long time, then glanced at Jinyoung and Jun at the next stop light before I quickly pulled myself over and kissed JB hyung.} 

_{On the cheek.}

_{I'm sure Jun and Jinyoung-sshi didn't see it, but JB hyung quickly turned to look at me with a very surprised look. He was holding his cheek.}

_{My heart beat got faster and I felt my face going hot. "Happy Valentine's Day." I leaned towards him and whispered it.}

_{"Happy Valentine's Day!" Jun yelled. I quickly turned to him but he wasn't look back at us.} 

_{I laughed and nodded, looking away from JB hyung and staring at the flower in my hand that I've been playing with in nervousness this whole time.} 

_{"What is the name of your hotel again Jaebum?" Jinyoung-sshi suddenly asked.} 

_{There was silence.}

_"Jaebum?"

_{"JB hyung." I quickly turned to my right and caught eyes with him. He still looked really shocked. "The hotel." I said.}

_{"Yeah." he said, telling Jinyoung-sshi the name of our hotel again.} 

_{"So you're really staying at such an expensive hotel." Jinyoung-sshi suddenly said, laughing.} 

_{"We've only ever been to an expensive hotel once. It was when I really wanted to celebrate my birthday." Jun said laughing. "Now we go to his friend's onsen." he finished.}

_{"It's better there. It helps your body." Jinyoung-sshi said. Jun laughed loudly.}

_{"I think you two will really enjoy the onsen. It will be better than today." Jinyoung-sshi said.} 

_{"But today was really fun. Thank you Jinyoung hyung." I said loudly.}

_{"You sound so excited. Make sure you get ready for Tokyo tower tomorrow." he said laughing. "How long will you two be here again?" he asked.}

_{I glanced at JB hyung. "We'll be here for the rest of the week. We're leaving on Monday." he replied.} 

_{"That's a short time." Jun said.}

_{"Because of your jobs?" Jinyoung-sshi asked.} 

_{"Yeah." JB hyung replied. "If it wasn't for our jobs then we could spend a little more time here. I like it here." he said.}

_{I smiled at his response.}

_{It really is so much more free here. Even though I'm feeling so strange.}

_{"Don't worry. You two will come again I'm sure." Jun suddenly said. I laughed and glanced at JB hyung. "Next time I'll plan it." I said. "It will be really big. You will be so surprised." I said, laughing.} 

_{We all laughed.} 

_{The rest of the ride was in silence. I almost took out my camera to film, but I realized it would be too dark to see.} 

_{"We're here!"} 

_{I snapped from my thoughts and looked outside to see our big hotel. JB hyung suddenly opened the door and I straightened myself up and picked up my flower.} 

_{JB hyung got out first. Before I could follow him, Jun's voice stopped me. I looked out the door at JB hyung waiting for me.}

_{"Just remember this Youngjae. This isn't Korea. This is Japan. Don't be so nervous. Let him know that you really care." he suddenly said.}

_{I froze, my face already turning hot on me.}

_{He sounds so serious. Let him know I care...?}

_{For the whole day Jun's voice has been very happy. He's always laughing when he talks and he makes sure to always smile and sound happy, but right now, telling me what he just told me, he sounds so serious.}

_{"Hey. Hurry." JB hyung suddenly said.} 

_{"Don't keep him waiting Jun. We'll see you two tomorrow Youngjae." Jinyoung-sshi suddenly said.}

_{"Ah...yes. Thank you for today hyung." I said, finally getting out of the car. We watched the car as Jinyoung-sshi drove off. I started trying to adjust the things in my hand.} 

_{JB hyung suddenly took the rose away from me and I thanked him as I tried to adjust my bag on my shoulder and my camera.}

_{"I'm done." I said, reaching for the flower.} 

_{JB hyung slowly gave it to me and we caught eyes for who knows how long. A quick memory of the kiss in the car made me look away.} 

_{How can I be so embarrassed when I only kissed his cheek?}

_{"Let's go."} 

_{I followed JB hyung into the hotel, my heart still beating so fast at the words from Jun in the car earlier. I stared at the back of JB hyung's head, at the rose I was keeping so close, and finally, once again at the silver bracelet he gave me.}

_{When I got the flower I didn't know how to feel, but now every time I look at it it makes me smile. Every time I look at the bracelet I feel...happy.}

_{I slowly smiled.}

_{I'm strange.} 

_{We finally made it to our door and JB hyung opened it, quickly took off his shoes and rushed to his bed. He didn't even turn on the lights. I laughed at him and found my way to my bed to turn on the light on the table.}

_{"I'm going to shower first." I said, putting everything on my bed.}

_{I carefully put the flower on my pillow and took off the bracelet.}

_{JB hyung didn't reply. I smiled at him, laying face down on the bed. "Don't fall asleep hyung." I said before running into the bathroom.}

_{The hot water made me realize how much we've been walking today. I closed my eye and started taking my shower.} 

_{"Hey. Why do you take so long? Are you done?" JB hyung suddenly knocked on the door.}

_{"I'm done. Give me a second hyung." I quickly said, turning off the water and stepping out to dry myself. I quickly brushed my teeth and finished putting my clothes on before opening the door. JB hyung walked past me into the bathroom.}

_{I laughed and closed the door behind me.} 

_{The flower.}

_{I noticed the rose on my pillow and quickly turned the room lights on and started looking for something to put it in. I found a cup in one of the closets. After going through my bag and finding a half full water bottle, I poured water into the cup and put the flower in it, smiling again.} 

_{"Maybe I should take a picture." I mumbled.}

_{I took out my phone and took more than one picture, smiling down at the picture. "I'm acting strange." I mumbled, laughing to myself.} 

_{Next I found the plastic bag from earlier at the cafe and took out the black box to put the bracelet back inside.}

_{"I can't get it dirty." I mumbled to myself.}

_{Ahh...what am I thinking? I am being strange. Let's watch some videos instead.}

_{I picked up the camera and sat down on JB hyung's bed, my bed full of all the stuff we bought.}

_{"The lights were so pretty today." I mumbled to myself, watching what I've recorded so far.} 

_{I didn't hear the sound of the shower stop or the sound of a door opening and closing. So when a drop of water hit my hand I jumped and looked up. JB hyung was drying his hair.}

_{"You're done?" I asked.} 

_{"Why? Are you waiting for me?" he asked. I laughed at him. "What are you saying? It's just...your hair is still wet. There's water on my hand." I said, nervously looking down at the camera.}

_{"Where did you find the cup?" JB hyung pointed at the cup with the flower inside, sitting on the small table next to my bed.} 

_{"In the closet. The flower will die without it right?" I replied.}

_{JB hyung just stared at it for a little longer, still drying his hair. I looked back down at the camera, watching the lights at Tokyo dome again.} 

_{"I'll go brush my teeth."} 

_{I looked up and watched as JB hyung disappeared into the bathroom. Once again I looked down at the camera.} 

_{"Hey. Why are you still sitting on my bed? Go to sleep. I'm tired." JB hyung suddenly said. I looked up at him standing next to the bathroom door. He was drying his hair again.}

_{I chuckled and apologized. "Don't you want to watch the lights? It's really pretty on this video." I said, lifting up the camera.}

_{JB hyung walked over to me. I stared at him, a smile on my face. I got the video ready again and lifted my head when he suddenly kissed me.} 

_{I froze.} 

_{"Hy...hyung." I said, touching my lips, and then quickly pulling my hand away from embarrassment.} 

_{"Surprised you?" he asked. I stared at him for a little while longer before smiling and nervously laughing as I remembered everything that's happened today.}

_{"It surprised me today too. In the car." he said.}

_{I remembered again. The kiss in the car. The kiss that I did.} 

_{It was really out in public, even if it was in the car. We've never tried it before. Not even JB hyung has tried something like it before. He doesn't even kiss me when Jackson and BamBam playfully kiss me on the cheek on my birthday.}

_{I'm surprised at myself that I even did it.} 

_{"Only a few more minutes before Valentine's Day is over." I said, looking at the time.} 

_{"Then one more kiss." JB hyung suddenly said.}

_{I looked up at him, my heart beating faster than it was earlier.} 

_{I really think something has changed today. It's like JB hyung has become more confident, and now I know how he felt when he wanted to confess to me before.} 

_{Once again, the words from Jun came into my head.}

_{What does he mean to let him know I really care? Let JB hyung know I really care? But I do care. He knows it already. Should I kiss him again? But that was so embarrassing to do.}

_{"Hey. Hurry and go to your bed. I'm tired now." JB hyung suddenly said. He yawned and I slowly stood up, staring at him.} 

_{I slowly turned off the camera and put it down. I stood there for a few seconds thinking about it all before I turned off the light on the table and then went to turn off the room light. I noticed JB hyung getting into bed. He yawned loudly again.}

_{In the darkness I walked over to him, my heart beating really fast. I couldn't believe what I was about to do, with my heart already beating so fast and my hands trembling from nervousness.}  

_{I'm so nervous. I'm going to die.}

_{"Hyung." I said.}

_{"Hm?" he replied. With the moon light coming from the window on my side, I'm sure he could see me standing over him.}

_{"You can." I quickly said.}

_{There was a short silence. A very long moment of no movement when a hand suddenly grabbed mine. JB hyung pulled me forward and I stumbled onto his bed.} 

_{I ended up laying on the side facing my bed and the window. JB hyung had an arm around me tightly, something I'm used to already. After a few minutes passed of silence I thought he already fell asleep.}

_{"Do you mean it." he suddenly asked.} 

_{I opened my eyes. "You're awake." I said, surprised.}

_{"Do you mean it?" he asked again.}

_{"Do I mean what?" I asked.}

_{"I can kiss you." he said.}

_{I tightened my fist and felt my heart starting again. The usual. What it's been doing so much since we came to Japan. Actually, I guess it's been like this for three years now. I'm the problem. I just can't stop being so embarrassed.}

_{"Why are you suddenly asking hyung..." I mumbled in embarrassment.}

_{"You really want me to say it again?" I asked.}

_{"I do." he quickly replied. "I really want to hear you say it again Youngjae." he replied.} 

_{If only he could feel my heart beating so fast. I hope I don't die from embarrassment.}

_{"You can do it hyung." I said, trying to be confident like Jun told me to.}

_{"Do what?" JB hyung asked.} 

_{"K...kiss." I quickly said.} 

_{"Don't be so nervous Youngjae." JB hyung suddenly whispered and it made me all the more nervous. He slowly turned me so I was laying on my back, staring up at him. I could barely see his face but I knew he was staring down at me.}

_{A long silence passed.}

_{"What are you doing hyung?" I asked nervously.}

_"Huh?"

_{"Y...you're just staring." I said.}

_{JB hyung suddenly kissed me. It was quick, like our usual kisses, it was so quick and he lifted himself again and stared down at me.} 

_{"You're staring again." I mumbled.}

_{"You're shaking." he said.} 

_{"Because you make me nervous." I finally told him the truth.}

_{A short silence passed. I closed my eyes tight.}

_{"I'm going to do it again. A real one." JB hyung suddenly said. "Do you know what a real kiss means?" he asked.}

_{What's with this embarrassing question? It's not like we haven't done this before. I know what this is.}

_{I wanted to hit him on the arm.}

_{"I'm not a little kid hyung. I'm just a little nervous." I said. "We've done this before right?" I asked.} 

_{Another kiss suddenly, this time longer. It surprised me, but I just kept my eyes closed and tried to follow JB hyung with every movement.}

_{After three years I still can't kiss properly.}

_{"Calm down." JB hyung suddenly whispered in my ear and I froze. "Sorry." I didn't know what to say so I just apologized.}

_{"Don't be so nervous."} 

_{"I'm trying..." I replied, laughing nervously.} 

_{We started again. This time I managed to calm myself down, but I didn't know what to with my trembling hands. My hands were frozen in the air.} 

_{I tried to copy everything JB hyung was doing when I suddenly felt a hand on my waist. I didn't think much of it, too busy trying to copy everything.}

_{I think I'm getting better. What am I thinking about? This is still so embarrassing.}

_{Suddenly JB hyung's hand went lower down my waist. It went lower and lower down my waist and suddenly there were fingers going towards a forbidden place.}

_{My hands left the air and I quickly grabbed JB hyung's arm. I could hear my loud breathing as we stopped kissing.} 

_{"No...all of a sudden...I don't think...wait...it's just...it's going so fast..." I quickly said, tightening my hold on his arm.}

_{There was a short silence. We were both breathing so hard.}

_{What are we doing? The same thing in that video? I can't do that. I'm scared.}

_{"I'm sorry." JB hyung suddenly said. I stared at the ceiling. He was laying on top of me so I couldn't see his face. "Let's stop." he said.} 

_{"N...no...." I felt my face getting hot. The room was getting hot.} 

_{I can't breathe. It's so hot. Can JB hyung hear my heart? It's so loud.}

_{"I know...I know what you are doing. I know what it is." My breathing finally started calming down.}

_"Hm?"

_{"The video hyung...the video we watched." I quickly said, my heart beating fast.} 

_{That day after JB hyung arrived home from service and he was suddenly very touchy. The video that Jr hyung's coworker sent for us to watch. What JB hyung was about to do a few seconds ago...it was on that video.} 

_{"That's right. So you really did watch it." he suddenly said, lifting himself off me.}

_{"I watched it all." I admitted.}

_{A short silence passed. I let go of JB hyung's hand and he pulled his hand away.}

_{"It's just all a little fast." I mumbled.} 

_{JB hyung suddenly fell on top of me again. "I know. It's fast for me too." he said. "I'm sorry." he apologized again.} 

_{"I'm sorry." I apologized back. "I'll make it up. Give me some time. Next time I'll be able to-"}

_{"Shut up Youngjae." JB hyung suddenly yawned and I closed my mouth, staring at the dark ceiling.} 

_{A short silence passed.}

_{"A...are you angry?" I asked.}

_{"What? Why would I be angry? I'm tired. Just go to sleep."} 

_{"I'm sorry." I apologized again.} 

_{"What are you apologizing for?" he asked.}

_{"Because I'm so inexperienced. I don't know what to do and everything scares me." I admitted, embarrassing myself.}

_{"Go to sleep Youngjae. Stop apologizing." JB hyung replied after a few seconds of silence.} 

_{"It scares me too, but the day will come when we will both be ready." he suddenly said. "We don't need to do this. All I need you to know is one thing, and you know it already."}

_{He's really so cheesy. But it's been three years. It's strange. It's been 3 years and we haven't even tried the beginning of what I saw in that video. If JB hyung was with a girl I'm sure it wouldn't be this long. I'm the problem. I need to learn and stop being so scared.}

_{"It will be soon." I embrassingly said.}

_{JB hyung chuckled. He let his whole weight fall on me all of a sudden and squeezed me in a hug.}

_{"You're so heavy hyung. Why are you suddenly laughing? I really mean it. I'm nervous. I'm really nervous. But I'm serious. It's not like I don't know...I mean, I don't really know with this type of relationship but...I can learn." I said.}

_{He continued laughing and I stared at the ceiling and started laughing too. Of course JB hyung's laugh always makes me laugh too.}

_{"But hyung." I mumbled after a long time of laughing together.}

_"Hm." 

_{"I feel strange." I said.}

_"Strange?"

_{"Yeah, since we got here. I've felt strange." I repeated.}

_{"You want to go back home?" JB hyung asked. He sounded concerned. It made me smile.} 

_{"No...it's with you." I quickly said.}

_"Huh?"

_{"This strange feeling." I said.}

_{"What is it?" he asked. He lifted himself up and I could tell he was staring down at me again.} 

_{"It's like...my heart...it's beating so fast." I quickly said, closing my eyes tight.}

_{There was a short silence. JB hyung suddenly fell on top of me again.}

_{He's really heavy.}

_{"I think you watched too many dramas Youngjae." he suddenly said, using the same words I use when he says something embarrassing.} 

_{I turned my head to the left and stared out the window, quietly laughing.}

_{"Yeah, maybe I have." I said. "I'm tired. Good night hyung."}

_{There was short silence.}

_{"Hey. Youngjae."}

_{I couldn't help myself, the laugh quickly escaped me and I pleaded and apologized until JB hyung let me go from the neck hold.}

_{"Hey! Why are you laughing?" he asked, finally falling besides me on the bed.} 

_{"Because it's been such a long time!" I yelled.} 

_{"A long time for what?" he asked.}

_{"Because you used to do this all the time. Before we went to sleep, you used to always talk about stupid things."}

_"Hey!"

_{I laughed and apologized.} 

_{"But you did it all the time before when I was in high school. When we went to Mokpo too don't you remember? I always found it funny. Suddenly you're doing it again." I said.}

_{"I'm still the same person."}

_{"You are." I said, laughing. All you could hear was my laugh before a hand suddenly went around me.}

_{"W...what is it?" I asked.} 

_{"I'm being serious when I say this Youngjae." JB hyung suddenly said.}

_{I stopped laughing and stared at the ceiling.}

_{"What is it hyung?" I asked.}

_{"I'm sorry for not talking to you when I was away." he suddenly said.}

_{"At service?" I asked.}

_{"Because you missed me. I missed you a lot too..." he paused. "But I didn't know what to do. If I heard your voice I would have done something stupid you know that right?" he asked.}

_{"I...know." I smiled and continued staring at the ceiling.} 

_{JB hyung started playing with my waist. It felt like he was moving a finger in circles around my waist. It tickled but I didn't want to ruin the moment.} 

_{"Tell me how you felt." he suddenly said.}

_{"Wha-what? What's with this suddenly?" I asked.}

_{"I want to know." he replied.}

_{I chuckled.}

_{"Your hands are trembling again right?" he suddenly asked.} 

_{"Bcause I'm nervous." I admitted.}

_{"With me?" he asked.}

_{"All the time." I replied.}

_{"Why?" he asked.}

_{My heart started beating fast suddenly.} 

_{I don't want to feel embarrased.}

_{"Hey. Choi Youngjae. I'm asking you why you're always so nervous around me?" he asked.}

_{"I...I don't know. I told you. I feel strange." I said.}

_{His finger suddenly stopped with the circles around my waist.} 

_{"Tell me how you felt when I was away." he suddenly said.}

_{"So suddenly..." I mumbled. Suddenly he grabbed my hand and I felt my body freeze.}

_{"Calm down." he whispered.}

_{"I'm trying." I whispered back.}

_{With my heart beating so fast, my body frozen, and my fingers trembling, I opened my mouth.}

_{"I really missed you hyung. It didn't bother me at first but I started missing you." I admitted.} 

_{"Your fingers are still trembling. Go on."} 

_{"Ah...umm...I started missing you. I thought something stupid. I was thinking that no one else laughs at my jokes besides you." I chuckled.} 

_{Even though I couldn't see his face, I could hear and feel JB hyung laughing. It was really really low, but I heard it, and it made me calm down just a little bit. He started rubbing my hand and I calmed down even more.}

_{Just tell him. Don't keep it all in so much. Jun was right.}

_{"I felt...a little scared." I mumbled.}

_"Hm?" 

_"Ah..."

_{Suddenly my heart started again. This is something that's big to talk about. It's what I've been feeling this whole time, not just when JB hyung was away at service.}

_{What if he breaks up with me? I really don't want to lose him. JB hyung thinks he will lose me but I'm afraid that I will lose him, and I don't want this. Even if he breaks up with me, even if he finds a girl, I want us to be together. It's something I want JB hyung to know, but I'm always afraid to talk about it.} 

_{"Hey. What is it?" he suddenly asked.}

_{"Ah...ah...you know, I think if I heard your voice too I would have done something stupid." I laughed.}

_{A short silence passed and JB hyung chuckled again, this time louder. I felt at ease. It made me feel really better.} 

_{"Your hands aren't trembling anymore." he suddenly said.} 

_{"I'm tired." I laughed.}

_{"Then good night."} 

_{"Good night hyung." I replied.}

_{_____________________________________________________________________________________}