Call Me JB Hyung : Sequel Chapter 13

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It's been a whole month since we returned from Jeju island and everyone has been busy working.

 

My time has become busy too. Recently a new worker has joined us. She is teacher Kim's assistant. She also works for other teachers sometimes.

 

Her name is Jieun noona.

 

She started work the day I returned from Jeju, and even though she's older than me and I'm usually very shy, we started talking and I found out we have everything in common. She even wants to do music therapy like me.

 

I am also busy with that. Now if I'm not at the school working, or with teacher Park and Jieun noona at the music therapy clinic, then I stay at home preparing to go to service. It's something I had only a little bit of time to tell JB hyung again before he went to Jackson's hometown for a concert.

 

This was a few days ago.

 

JB hyung's coming back today and everything's already prepared for me to go do my service. My dad was so happy to teach me everything to be prepared. He's secretly been waiting for me to go.

 

In two months I will finally be leaving. It's only a short time, but I want to hurry and go and come back quickly.

 

Teacher Park left early today so I'm left in the teachers office finishing the music papers he usually makes me do.

 

I didn't hear my phone ringing until teacher Kim suddenly tapped my shoulder and pointed to my phone.

 

"Youngjae-ah, are you okay? Your phone is ringing." she picked up my phone and looked at it. "Hm? JB hyung. It says JB hyung. Is that your roommate?" she asked, giving me the phone.

 

"What? Yes. He's-my roommate." I quickly took the phone, wondering why JB hyung was suddenly calling me. He never usually calls when he knows I'm working.

 

"Hello?"

 

I looked up at teacher Kim and she smiled and patted my shoulder. I watched her walking away, sighing.

 

I thought she would ask me to do something because Jieun noona isn't here.

 

"Youngjae? Hey! Choi Youngjae!"

 

I jumped at JB hyung's voice. "Hyung. Why are you so loud?" I asked, chuckling. I haven't heard his voice or seen him in a few days. He's someone who usually never calls for a long time when he's away. He still has this habit from years ago. It's better now, but he still does it sometimes.

 

I think I still do it sometimes too. When I get so busy I don't call or message anyone back.

 

JB hyung has become really busy since we came back, so I haven't really seen him in almost a month. For a few weeks when we returned from Jeju, he always came home late and left early, and a few days ago he went to China.

 

"Hey. Are you listening? I'm asking where are you?"

 

"Ah...sorry.." I laughed, quickly apologizing. "I'm at work. Hyung...Why are you calling me? It's international." I said, slowly getting up. I looked around, caught eyes with some of the teachers and mouthed bathroom.

 

They nodded and I hurried towards the bathroom.

 

"Hey. You never call when you get busy. I always call you first. We need to change this." he groaned.

 

"You don't call me either!" I laughed.

 

"I called you once. When you're working I know you don't like being bothered.

 

I smiled, remembering how he called me the day he arrived. We talked about chicken. He said he wanted to eat chicken when he returned.

 

I chuckled and nodded. "But I message you right hyung? Calling is money."

 

"Hey. What are you talking about? If you call or message it is money. It doesn't change." he mumbled.

 

I laughed.

 

JB hyung will never say he wants me to call him. So now when I don't he sometimes mumbles something about it. I can always hear it. He gets annoyed when I don't call him.

 

But I'm more of a message person.

 

I chuckled.

 

"You're not done?" he suddenly asked.

 

"Huh? I'm almost done. I only have to go print it all out and leave it on teacher Park's desk. What are you doing hyung?" I asked, stepping into the bathroom. I stared at myself in the mirror and noticed the dark circles under my eyes.

 

"I'm coming to pick you up."

 

"Huh?" I asked, a little surprised. "You're back?" I asked.

 

"Yeah. I arrived a few hours ago. We had a meeting and just finished. Are you in the teachers room?" he asked.

 

"W-what?" I was still panicking. "You should just go home hyung. Aren't you tired?" I asked, noticing how tired his voice sounded through the phone.

 

"Hey. Can't your boyfriend come pick you up from work?" he suddenly asked.

 

"W-what? What are you saying?" I laughed loudly and heard him chuckling too.

 

There was a short silence.

 

"You can come pick me up hyung." I mumbled.

 

"Huh? What? What did you say? I didn't hear. Say it again." I heard him chuckling. I knew he was lying. He heard me.

 

"What should I say?" I laughed.

 

"Should I come pick you up?" he asked. He started laughing and I just listened to his laughing voice, laughing with him.

 

"Please come pick me up hyung." I replied.

 

"I have something to tell you." he suddenly said.

 

"To tell me? What is it? Did something happen?"

 

"I'll tell you when I get there. Hurry. I'm almost there. I'm sleepy." he yawned loudly in my ear and I chuckled.

 

"Ok. I'll hurry and finish." I smiled. "But I have to get off the phone first hyung." I said, walking out of the bathroom.

 

"Yeah. I'm hanging up." he said.

 

"Ok." I said, laughing. "Bye."

 

"Youngjae?"

 

"Huh? Did you call me?" I asked.

 

"Has anyone called you?"

 

"Huh?"

 

Silence.

 

"Hello? Jaebum hyung?"

 

"My past girlfriend. She hasn't called you right?" he asked.

 

I quickly remembered what Mark hyung told me when we were in Jeju. Now the silence was coming from me.

 

Did Mark hyung tell him? So JB hyung is sad? He doesn't want me to talk to her. I don't really want to talk to her either. She hasn't called me at all. I think Mark hyung is right. She's lying. She doesn't have my number. I don't want to make JB hyung think about her.

 

"Youngjae."

 

"Don't worry hyung! I haven't talked to anyone but my sister and my mom and my brother and the guys..." I paused. "...and you. I haven't talked to anyone." I said.

 

There was a short silence.

 

"I got a message. Don't pick up to any strange numbers okay?" he sounded serious now.

 

"I won't! Why would I do that?" I laughed.

 

A short silence again.

 

"JB hyung? Is this what you wanted to tell me?" I asked.

 

"Huh?"

 

"You said you have something to tell me." I laughed, stopping in front of the teachers room.

 

"No. I'll tell you when I pick you up." he said.

 

I laughed and nodded. "Ok. I'm in front of the door so-"

 

"Youngjae?"

 

"Hm?"

 

"Tonight...lets..." he paused.

 

"Let's..." I repeated after him and paused like he did.

 

"Never mind. Hurry! I'm coming now!" he said.

 

I laughed and nodded. "What...ok. ok. Bye." I said loudly.

 

"Bye."

 

I turned off the phone, put it in my pocket, opened the door, walked in, and sat down only to understand what JB hyung wanted to say.

 

Let's...Let's...He wanted to do that?

 

I felt my ears going hot.

 

"Youngjae!"

 

I jumped at the call of my name.

 

"Are you finished? Teacher Park wants me to take the papers from you. I have to make copies for my class. If only Jieun was here. Teacher Cho took her from me today." she whined.

 

"Ah...I'm finished. I just need to print it." I said.

 

"Then print some for me. Be my assistant for only this time while I wait for Jieun. I need 30 copies." she said.

 

I chuckled and nodded, quickly standing up, what JB hyung was trying to say going to the back of my head.

 

It didn't take long for me to finish. After making sure everything was on teacher Park's table and giving teacher Kim her work, I cleaned up my little area in the teacher's room and quickly walked out of the room, smiling at my phone.

 

JB hyung sent two messages while I was printing. He sent another one as soon as I finished everything.

 

Both of the messages told me to hurry. He was hungry and tired. It just made me laugh. The last two trips he went on, when he came back he spent two days at home just sleeping.

 

Maybe he's going to sleep again.

 

I stepped out of the school and looked up at the sky. I haven't been outside since I came to work in the morning so the air is really good.

 

My phone quickly started ringing and I hurried and answered it.

 

"Hey. Youngjae. Where are you?" JB hyung asked.

 

I laughed, staring ahead and walking faster. "I'm coming. I'm outside walking to the front. You should of just went home hyung."

 

"Hey. What did I say? I was on my way anyway. Where are you outside. You made me walk all the way inside." I heard him yawn.

 

"You're inside?" I quickly turned around and faced the door I just walked out of. "I'm outside. Where I sit to eat sometimes. Remember the seat you and Jackson hyung always used for lunch?"

 

"I'm coming."

 

He didn't give me a chance to say anything when the dial tone started. I laughed at the phone and sat down, staring at all the messages we've sent to each other since he left.

 

We didn't really do much in Jeju. We didn't go further and we didn't do anything new, but somehow I still feel something new between me and JB hyung.

 

I feel...shy...but...I'm okay when he touches me. I can even touch him now sometimes without getting nervous at what his reaction will be.

 

Even though I still haven't started it first like he always does, I always make sure I remember what he teaches me. What he does to me.

 

I think I'm even better at kissing now.

 

"What am I thinking?" I mumbled and chuckled, covering half my face.

 

"Hey. You. I knew it! You are the one right?"

 

I didn't know the voice was calling out to me. I continued staring at my phone, thinking of the embarrassing things that JB hyung and I have done and the more embarrassing things we haven't done when a hand landed on my shoulder.

 

"You found me!"

 

I stood up, a wide smile on my face, only to lower my head and stare down at a girl.

 

She smiled wide up at me and I looked at her confused, the smile on my face slowly going away.

 

Who is this?

 

"Hi!" she said loudly. "Remember me?" she asked.

 

"Huh? Ah..." I stared at her. "I don't think I remember yo-"

 

"What? You don't even remember Jaebum's girlfriend? Well we met only once right? But it's not like I changed much. I knew you worked here. My friend also works here now too. I always see you and remember that I met you before. It's been such a long time right? I talked to Mark oppa. How is Jaebum oppa?" she smiled wide, asking so many questions.

 

I felt confused. I suddenly didn't know what to say or what to do.

 

She probably doesn't have my number but who would have thought that I will suddenly see her here. At my job-wait JB hyung is-

 

"Hey!" she suddenly tapped my shoulder.

 

"Ah...uh...sorry yes I remember. JB hyung's past girlfriend. When we were eating. What...why are you here?" I asked.

 

"Hey. That's rude." she suddenly said.

 

"Ah...ah...sorry. I'm sorry." I really didn't know what to say.

 

She suddenly started laughing. "You look so nervous! I remember you even if we met only once. So you are roommates with Jaebum oppa now? How is he? He is still doing dance at the company right?" she suddenly asked.

 

Huh? How does she know where JB hyung works? Did Mark hyung tell her?

 

"Hey. Can you hear me?" she suddenly started shaking her hand in front of me and I stared at her.

 

Of course she knows. She dated JB hyung. She must know a lot about JB hyung. She knows more than me.

 

Her laughing made me stare down at her once again.

 

"You're funny. Your face is so red are you okay? I work near here and sometimes I come here to see my friends. I see you sometimes. Are you finished? I'm done working too. I was going to visit my friend but maybe if you're hungry we can go get something to eat! Have you had dinner?"

 

She asks a lot of questions, but she's really nice. She's really pretty. JB hyung likes pretty girls.

 

I stared at her smiling.

 

Why would he choose someone like me?

 

"Hey." a hand landed on my shoulder and once again I caught eyes with her.

 

"Ah...it's okay I'm going ho-"

 

"Youngjae!" the loud familiar voice made me jump and I looked over the girl to see JB hyung walking towards me. "Hey Choi Youngjae. I've been looking for you everywhe-"

 

"Jaebum-ah!" the girl suddenly squealed and turned around quickly.

 

I could only watch as she ran up to JB hyung, wrapped arms around his shocked body, and squeeze him tight in a hug.

 

I could only stare.

 

JB hyung was frozen. He didn't move or say anything. I couldn't tell what he was thinking.

 

We just talked about this. But I didn't answer a call from her. She-she found me.

 

I felt something suddenly hurt in my chest and lowered my head, nervously playing with my fingers.

 

They look good together.

 

"What are you doing?" JB hyung's voice suddenly caught my attention and I lifted my head. He pulled the girl away and I remember so clearly the same face he made years ago when she came towards us with her new boyfriend.

 

"I-JB hyung." I quickly said.

 

I know JB hyung gets angry when he thinks about her, but I really don't like it when he and the guys talk bad to her. She seems nice, but the wrong she did was something wrong to JB hyung and because of that I can't seem to like her either, but it doesn't mean I will stand by and let them be mean to her.

 

I am not that type of person.

 

"Hey! Choi Youngjae." JB hyung suddenly walked towards me and I could tell he was really annoyed, maybe even angry. I haven't seen his angry face in a long time. Not the angry face he shows me when he thinks I still think we are a joke, but this angry face I've seen before a long time ago.

 

Every time she was mentioned.

 

"Let's go." he suddenly grabbed my hand and I almost fell while reaching for my bag.

 

Any other time I would pull away and try to talk to him about it but I know how JB hyung feels about her. He really loved her. So he may be angry.

 

He didn't even give her a chance to say anything. She ran after us for a while but soon stopped and just waved at me. I waved back, feeling a little guilty at the look on her face.

 

It seems...they both really loved each other. I wonder why she broke his heart. JB hyung even got her a ring.

 

I stared at JB hyung's hand holding my hand as we walked away from the school and towards his car.

 

"Hyung.." I pulled at my hand and he let go, but he didn't look at me.

 

This is what he usually does when he's annoyed at something or angry. He might really go to sleep as soon as we get back.

 

We reached his car and sat inside. I could feel my heart beating so fast but I didn't know why.

 

I really never thought we would see her ever again, especially after so many years. It's been so long, but JB hyung still recognizes her, and she even still has Mark hyung's number.

 

I felt so nervous. My hands started shaking. I couldn't stop feeling nervous because we were just sitting in the car. JB hyung didn't make a move and I stared at my shoes

 

"She's really pretty." I chuckled and tried to make a joke but I don't know why I thought saying something like that would cheer him up.

 

"Hey." JB hyung turned to face me and we stared at each other.

 

"I like you." he suddenly said.

 

I stared at him and slowly felt myself smiling.

 

"I...like you too hyung." I said.

 

JB hyung let his head rest on the wheel of the car and he stared at me so hard. I could only smile at him.

 

"Didn't you say you're sleepy?" I asked, chuckling loudly. "Let's go home hyung!" I said loudly.

 

"Hey! Choi Youngjae. I love you!" he suddenly yelled.

 

I paused and stared at him, my heart beating loudly, but I don't feel nervous. JB hyung has said this a few other times, and every time he does my heart skips a beat and I get a little nervous. After 4 years he still does this to me. He can make me stop being nervous and he can make me get really nervous. It's something only he can do.

 

I smiled lightly and stared down at my shoes, nodding a little.

 

"I told you not to talk to her." he suddenly said.

 

"I didn't." I quickly frowned. "No one called me. She just suddenly showed up and I didn't know what to do. I couldn't just walk away."

 

A short silence passed.

 

Should I apologize? She really hurt JB hyung's heart.

 

He sighed loudly and I stared at him.

 

"Don't meet with her again." he suddenly said.

 

What? What's this? He really doesn't want me to talk to her? Is it only because she hurt him? Does JB hyung still like her?

 

"Hey!"

 

"Huh?" I stared at him shocked.

 

"Don't think anything strange. You know who I like. He's the only person I like." JB hyung suddenly said and I quickly looked away, really embarrassed now.

 

"She...she really hurt you hyung."

 

"Huh?"

 

"I can tell. I...I don't have any experience with this but I can tell that you really care about her." I mumbled.

 

"Hey..."

 

"But it's okay because maybe she was the first person you really loved." I finished and a long silence passed. I didn't even think I could say those words.

 

"You've changed." he suddenly said.

 

"Huh?" I lifted my head and caught eyes with him.

 

"You would never say that to me before." he said.

 

Really? What is he saying?

 

"I don't know much about it but I remember how you were acting back then hyung. You love her." I said.

 

"I loved her." he said.

 

He stared at me hard.

 

"You still care about her even if you don't want to talk to her hyung."

 

A short silence passed.

 

"Right." he suddenly said. "I never talk about her because I've forgotten her. But she was the first Youngjae and now it's changed. It's changed for a long time now and you know why it's changed." he suddenly said.

 

I looked down at my shoes again, this time rubbing at my thighs.

 

"I know her. She will say something that will make you angry. She will say something that...I just...I don't want you...I don't want her to suddenly come back after all these years when you and I...we're...damn I just came back and have to deal with this." he said loudly.

 

I quickly turned to look at him. JB hyung was laying his head on the wheel still, but he wasn't looking at me anymore.

 

"I'm sorry hyung." I quickly said.

 

"Why are you apologizing?" he asked

 

"Because you're tired and we shouldn't talk about something that makes you sad. I won't talk to her anymore. If she comes I will tell her that I won't talk to her." I mumbled.

 

Another silence passed.

 

"Hey! Choi Youngjae."

 

"Yes! Im Jaebum!" I laughed.

 

"Hey!"

 

I laughed loudly as an arm suddenly went around me and JB hyung pulled me close.

 

"W-wait..." I laughed as he suddenly started tickling me, pulling me closer. "Wait- don't..." I stopped him by grabbing his hand. We...we're not home." I said, a little embarrassed.

 

"Then let's go home." he suddenly said.

 

"Let's..." I paused. "You were asking on the phone." I mumbled.

 

"Can we?" he suddenly asked.

 

"What..." I pushed him away, so suddenly nervous that my fingers were trembling. "Why are you asking embarrassing things?" I said.

 

I could hear him laughing.

 

Finally the car started and I smiled as we started driving home.

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"W-wait. Hyung. JB hyung." I was being pulled into his room. He didn't turn on the lights so I stumbled and he pulled me all the way until I felt myself sitting on the bed.

 

"Wait. Hyung." I stopped him, so nervous I could feel my heart racing so fast, and my whole body was shaking.

 

JB hyung is usually not so...demanding. But I also need to stop being nervous.

 

I can do this. Whatever this is.

 

A cold hand touched my stomach and I quickly grabbed his wrist.

 

"Let me shower first hyung. We-we should shower-"

 

I kept my head lowered even though the room was dark.

 

I suddenly felt a warm hand on my cheek, then a sudden kiss on my lips.

 

"W-wait. Why are you like this? Hyung. What happened at your work?" I laughed as both his hands were now rubbing against my sides, almost as if he wanted to tickle me.

 

He suddenly did.

 

"Wait. Why are you suddenly tickling me for?" I laughed loudly and tried to stop him. I could feel JB hyung's body heat. He wasn't laying on top of me but I could feel it. I wondered if he could hear my heart beating so fast, if he could feel my sweaty hands.

 

I have gotten used to this of course and it shouldn't make me so nervous anymore, but really, maybe something happened while he was away. JB hyung isn't usually so demanding when we start doing stuff like this.

 

He's usually...slow.

 

"Hyung."

 

"Youngjae-ah..." he suddenly mumbled my name in my ear, and of course it made me shiver.

 

Did he drink something?

 

His cold hands continued going up my sides, but he wasn't tickling me anymore.

 

"Did-did you drink something?" I quickly asked.

 

"Hey, no. What did I say before?" he suddenly got annoyed and I laughed at the sudden change.

 

"Let me go shower hyung. You need one too. You smell." I laughed loudly as he quickly started tickling me once again.

 

Somehow I managed to pull away and run towards my room.

 

"You're going crazy hyung!" I yelled loudly. I could hear him coming after me and I managed to close the door before he could get to me. I tried calming myself down from laughing so hard.

 

"Hey! I'm taking the shower first then!" he suddenly yelled from the other side of the door.

 

"What?"

 

I heard him laughing and sighed, giggling loudly.

 

What's gotten into him? JB hyung is acting strange all of a sudden. It really seems like he had something to drink.

 

I didn't have to wait for long before I heard a knock on my door. JB hyung didn't suddenly come to me like earlier, instead he started walking into the kitchen when I opened the door, probably to find something to eat.

 

I laughed at him and rushed to the bathroom when he asked why I was laughing.

 

It was only after I finished taking my shower and went back to my room to find something to wear when I remembered exactly what was about to happen earlier.

 

I didn't do what Jun hyung told me to prepare.

 

I stood at the front of my room, watching JB hyung play a game on my computer. My heart was beating fast. His back was facing me and he was wearing the headset.

 

I nervously walked into the room and found something to wear.

 

I don't even know where the bag is. JB hyung unpacked everything.

 

"Where's coco?"

 

I lifted my head and JB hyung was staring at me, holding a bowl of soup. He turned slightly and scooped some rice into his mouth from the other bowl on my table.

 

"She's...with my mom." I nervously finished putting on my shirt and glanced at him.

 

"So we're alone." he suddenly said.

 

I caught eyes with him again and I could tell he was really really serious. Usually he isn't like this at all. A month ago in Jeju he wasn't like this. He was as nervous as I was then, now it seems JB hyung isn't nervous anymore.

 

It's a little scary. What happened that JB hyung suddenly wants to do this now?

 

"We're...alone. You can sleep without any barking." I chuckled nervously, playing with my fingers.

 

JB hyung suddenly stood up and I watched him. He scooped the last bit of rice in his mouth and finished his soup.

 

"You're going to sleep?" I quickly asked, following him out of the door and towards the kitchen.

 

"I want to meet in my room."

 

I paused.

 

He walked to the sink, washed his bowls, and turned around to face me.

 

"Are you embarrassed?" he asked.

 

He was surprising me more and more. He was acting really really strange.

 

Where did all the confidence suddenly come from?

 

Even though Jackson hyung always says he's a true man and JB hyung always acts like he isn't afraid to say or do anything he wants, he's always been...slow with me.

 

For me I guess.

 

Did something change after Jeju?

 

We didn't get any time together at all before he suddenly had to leave for the concert. It's really the first time I've seen JB hyung for more than a few hours since we came back from Jeju.

 

I'm so embarrassed. My heart is beating so fast. I'm acting like a girl.

 

"Choi Youngjae."

 

I looked up at him.

 

"Can we meet in my room?"

 

I stared at him.

 

He stared back with a very serious look on his face now.

 

"You-JB hyung you want to-"

 

"Hey. Just come on." he quickly interrupted me.

 

I watched him walk past me into his room. With my heart beating so fast and now my whole body trembling, I turned around and walked after him.

 

JB hyung let me walk in first. I slowly did and he closed the door.

 

"Wait hyung-"

 

I turned around only to suddenly be pulled into a hug. JB hyung wrapped his arms around me so I couldn't move mine to hug him back. With my arms laying on my sides and my heart beating even faster now, I just let my head rest on his shoulder.

 

"What...happened?" I asked after a long silence.

 

He's done this before. He usually doesn't do this stuff but when he does it means something happened. Like the time he got in a fight at his past girlfriends party and suddenly came to my house. It seems at these times JB hyung just wants a hug.

 

"Did something happen at your job?" I asked.

 

Silence.

 

"Hyung?"

 

Silence.

 

"JB hyung." I managed to pull my arms from under his and wrap it around his back, returning the hug.

 

"Jaebum hyung are you okay?" I asked.

 

He suddenly started chuckling. I could feel his breath on the side of my neck. Suddenly I was being pushed back. We both fell on the bed side by side and I laughed as the air left me.

 

"JB hyung. You're trying to kill me! I'm not a teddy bear!" I laughed loudly.

 

"Youngjae."

 

"Hm?"

 

"Can we?"

 

Silence.

 

"You're scared?" he suddenly asked.

 

"You-you want to?" I nervously asked back.

 

He didn't reply.

 

"Why so suddenly?" I asked.

 

"It's not sudden."

 

I tried glancing at him but I couldn't see his face.

 

"I've always wanted to do this. Ever since my second year in service." he suddenly said.

 

"W-what..." I mumbled.

 

"Thinking about you I did that. I am-"

 

"What...what are you talking about? What did you do?" I quickly yelled and lifted myself up and hit his chest. I covered my face. JB hyung started chuckling.

 

Soon there was silence. I covered my whole face, feeling so embarrassed at what he just revealed.

 

So that means-

 

"Thinking of you I did it. With your picture too." he suddenly said.

 

"What?" I got up only to feel a hand wrap around mine and pull me to sit down.

 

A long silence passed this time.

 

"Did you drink something?" I finally asked, the same question I asked earlier.

 

"I said I will never do that again, especially if you're around." he replied.

 

"Then why suddenly?" I asked.

 

"I was thinking about it again this week. You're preparing to go to service in two months..." he mumbled.

 

That's right. JB hyung and I haven't even done everything still yet. It's like we learned everything for nothing.

 

I lifted my hands from my face and stared at my feet.

 

But...that...it's still scary. I do want to try with JB hyung but...it's really scary. We still haven't talked about it all yet. Can we do it so suddenly?

 

"How do you feel about that?"

 

"Huh?"

 

"That I think about you when doing that stuff?" he asked

 

"Wha...what stuff?" I pretended I didn't know.

 

"Hey."

 

I wanted to laugh, but instead I sighed. "I...I don't know. Why are you suddenly saying all of this hyung. You just came back."

 

"And I just saw you together with her."

 

"This is about your ex girlfriend?" I quickly turned to look at him and he was staring at me hard.

 

"No. It isn't. I've always thought about this. I thought about it and did it this weekend. I even used money to call Jinyoung hyung in Japan and talk to him about it. Now you know that I think of you in that way." he said.

 

My heart really skipped a beat. I quickly looked away in embarrassment.

 

"Hyung...you're saying embarrassing things."

 

Silence.

 

I played with my fingers.

 

"You know...there's also something I want to say hyung. If we're going to talk about this." I mumbled.

 

"Tell me everything." he suddenly said.

 

I turned around to look at him and he was finally not looking at me. Instead now JB hyung looked embarrassed himself.

 

"I was also thinking about everything when you were gone. Jinyoung and Jun hyung taught us everything but we still haven't done any of it." I lowered my eyes and stared at anything but him. "I...I also want to hyung. I'm a little scared but...I want to try it if it's with you."

 

I turned my body again so my back was facing him.

 

A short silence passed and suddenly I felt a hand on my shoulder.

 

"What...you...you're shaking." I chuckled nervously.

 

"Why do you think?" he asked. Suddenly I was pushed back. I don't even know how it happened but JB hyung was hovering over me suddenly. He leaned down and we kissed.

 

It started out slow. For me and JB hyung it always starts slow. I think he does this for me because even though I'm better at it now, sometimes I still manage to hit his teeth with mine and we always laugh when I do.

 

A cold hand suddenly went under my shirt and landed on my hip. I didn't realize it until it moved towards the waist of my sleeping pants.

 

Maybe I lied. Everything else I'm not so embarrassed about but who wouldn't be embarrassed if someone wanted to take your clothes off?

 

My trembling hand quickly wrapped around JB hyung's.

 

He laughed and suddenly wrapped his arms around me. His arms lifted me up a little and pulled me into a sudden hug while we were still laying on the bed.

 

"What are you doing?" I mumbled.

 

He just chuckled.

 

My heart beat started rising again.

 

It's really hot.

 

"You're nervous." JB hyung said.

 

I nodded, even though he couldn't see it.

 

"We're not doing anything though." he mumbled.

 

He was really too close.

 

How can he feel so comfortable being this close. It's hot and sticky.

 

"You...you still really make me nervous sometimes hyung..." I admitted.

 

I could feel his breath on my ear and it made me shiver in nervousness even more.

 

We've done more than this and I still feel this way? It's just touching. We haven't even done the other thing we do. When JB hyung touches me. When I touch him.

 

"Hey. Calm down. You're suddenly frozen." he patted my arm and I tried to calm down.

 

"What can I do to make you not nervous?" he asked so quickly that I didn't hear him.

 

"I didn't hear. Did you say something?" I asked.

 

"Hey." he mumbled.

 

I chuckled and apologized. "My hands are trembling." I mumbled.

 

"To not make you so nervous...what should I do?" he suddenly asked me again.

 

"Wha-what...I-I don't know." I replied. His question made me even more nervous.

 

"You're shaking even more." he said.

 

"Sorry." I didn't know what to say so I apologized again.

 

"Why are you nervous around me but when Mark wraps his hands around you you're fine?" he suddenly asked.

 

I tried to pull myself away and get up to look at him but I couldn't. JB hyung's arms just tightened around me. It felt a little uncomfortable and hot, but I didn't want to ruin whatever moment we were having.

 

Something that can lead to more finally.

 

I couldn't ruin it because I was feeling embarrassed.

 

I laid there in silence for a few minutes staring at the ceiling.

 

"JB hyung."

 

"Yeah?"

 

"Me and Mark hyung...there's really nothing." I mumbled.

 

"I know." he replied.

 

"Then why are you-"

 

"Because every time I touch you you start trembling and shaking. You always say I make you nervous and embarrassed and you can't be around me sometimes. Sometimes we can't even look at each other. It bothers me." he suddenly admitted.

 

I really wanted to get up, but he didn't release his hold. It just got tighter and he leaned closer because now I could feel his breath on my ear

 

He's too close. It's too hot.

 

"It's hot." I mumbled.

 

But JB hyung didn't move at all or say anything.

 

"Don't you know why hyung?" I quickly asked.

 

"Know what?" he asked.

 

"I...I like you. It's because I like you that I get so nervous with you. It's because...we're a couple right? It's embarrassing to see each other right? This stuff...I never think of it when I'm with the others, but when you suddenly hug me or hold me, or touch me hyung I'm...more aware...I think it's because I like you. I'm not running away from that hyung."

 

Silence.

 

"I don't like Mark hyung like I like you. I don't like anyone else like I like you hyung. Right now since we...we're together I'm trying hard to do things that couples do. I'm sorry that I'm bad at this stuff."

 

"Don't apologize." he suddenly said. "We're both bad at this stuff."

 

I chuckled, once again feeling his nervous shaking hands around me. I get embarrassed when we do this stuff, but sometimes JB hyung gets embarrassed too and it makes me feel better seeing his ears get red suddenly or his hand tremble like mine does.

 

"You say we're both bad but you-"

 

"Youngjae." he suddenly said my name.

 

"You have more experience hyung. With this stuff I don't. But it's not that I don't want to do this stuff with you. I want to. I even learned all those embarrassing things so we can...but...but because I know what you are to me I get embarrassed and nervous. I'm so stupid."

 

"Hey."

 

I laughed and stopped talking.

 

"Let me kiss you." he suddenly said.

 

"What...don't ask. If you ask I get embarrassed." I mumbled.

 

JB hyung finally let me go from the hug and he stared down at me. We stared at each other.

 

"Hyung.."

 

"Hm?"

 

"Can we do it the other way?" I asked, a bit shy, glancing away so we weren't looking directly at each other so closely.

 

"What? What did you say?" he asked.

 

"Uh...you're heavy and...this...this way is a little..."

 

Uncomfortable.

 

"I'm getting up." he lifted himself up off me and I sighed and lifted myself up too. "I'm sweating because it's so hot." I laughed.

 

A quick kiss on my lips and I froze again. This time not because of nervousness, but the kiss surprised me.

 

JB hyung pulled close and kissed me again. I returned it this time. We were sitting face to face on the bed. Like what we do when we are doing the other even more embarrassing things.

 

Touching.

 

This time when I felt a hand on the waist of my sleeping pants I didn't move to pull it away. I just focused on the kiss.

 

A finger lifted the pants from my waist and somehow JB hyung suddenly pulled it down. I even felt some cold air. I almost pulled away.

 

After this he didn't touch me but I could feel him moving. When I finally realized what he was doing, my ears started getting hot and my heart started beating loud again.

 

"Lay down." he suddenly said in my ear.

 

"Hyung-"

 

"To take these off." he mumbled, his hand suddenly back on the waist of my sleeping pants that are now pulled down a little.

 

It was dark, but I could still see him and that made me even more nervous. But I did what JB hyung said. I slowly laid down and both my hands covered my face as I felt him taking off my pants.

 

JB hyung's hands were so cold. I felt the cold air more now and knew he took evething off. Even my underwear.

 

"Hyung-"

 

"Let me take mine off." he suddenly said.

 

With my hands still covering my face, my heart still beating so fast, I slowly nodded. Even though he probably couldn't see.

 

It wasn't long before hands wrapped around my arms and JB hyung helped me up. We sat face to face again. I didn't know what to do with my hands so I kept them on my face.

 

JB hyung didn't say anything.

 

I shivered and shifted away a little at his hands that suddenly touched me.

 

Why only me?

 

"I could already feel the pain in my lower stomach when he suddenly touched and started doing what we do now. Using his hands, going up and down. It wasn't long before I felt it, my head falling on his shoulder.

 

"JB hyung-" it came out more like a whisper.

 

"Wait. Me too." he suddenly said.

 

I tightened my eyes. The pressure in my lower body, even thought it didn't really hurt, but I felt it and it ached.

 

"Can we lay down?" JB hyung suddenly asked.

 

Huh? What is he saying? Why? It's...uncomfortable and hot and...this feeling. It's starting to hurt.

 

"JB hyung-" I said again.

 

"Let's lay down." he said

 

I didn't care anymore at this point. I didn't have the courage to touch myself and JB hyung was leading my hands to touch him so I just slowly laid myself down and quickly felt him over over me.

 

It's really uncomfortable.

 

A short silence passed. JB hyung didn't do anything.

 

But maybe I can do this for JB hyung. Whatever it is. I hope it's not-

 

"Hyung-we can't...what are we doing?" I quickly asked him.

 

"Trust me." he suddenly said.

 

My heart was still beating fast, the ache in my lower stomach was starting to hurt, and my body was so hot while I was trying to think of what we were doing and why we were laying down.

 

The silence didn't last long before I felt JB hyung's hands again. I flinched because I wasn't expecting it.

 

I could feel his hand going down my stomach. I wanted to tell at him to stop because it tickled, but I didn't want to ruin whatever moment we were having. I kept my eyes closed tight. JB hyung's fingers kept getting lower and lower until they reached my hips.

 

"Wha-what are you doing?" I mumbled. "It...tickles."

 

"Don't get scared. Trust me?" he suddenly asked.

 

Huh? Trust? What?

 

"It hurts hyung..." I mumbled, biting at my lips now. My hands started leaning closer to the place that was causing my lower stomach to ache.

 

"We're doing something different." JB hyung suddenly said.

 

His body suddenly fell on top of mine and I felt him.

 

We were touching at the same spot. The spot that was causing my lower stomach to hurt.

 

"H-hyung." I froze, quickly pushing at his chest.

 

"Youngjae." his voice went through my ear as he suddenly said my name.

 

"I-I..." I didn't know what to say but I didn't know whether I could do it. Whatever new thing he wanted to try. I couldn't believe I was having second thoughts all ready.

 

"Youngjae you're shaking again."

 

"Huh?" I noticed I was shaking really hard this time and cursed myself. "I guess I'm more nervous than I thought." I said.

 

I know that JB hyung wants to do more than just touch. I know because I want to too...but deep inside I feel more like...am I really ready? To do this all the way between two guys? I can't even stop my own shaking and I stopped JB hyung even earlier then when I usually stop him.

 

"Trust me?" JB hyung suddenly asked. "I-I-do." I quickly replied.

 

I really trust JB hyung.

 

"I'm going to move." he said. "Give me your hand."

 

He suddenly grabbed hold of my left hand and squeezed it tight. JB hyung suddenly started moving and one of those strange noises that I try to keep in came out anyway.

 

"S-sorry." I quickly apologized.

 

JB hyung was rubbing on me slowly. It hurt a little more, the ache in my lower stomach.

 

I never thought this is what we would be doing when he came back.

 

I quickly covered my mouth with my free hand so no more strange noises would come out. I closed my eyes and tried to think of how embarrassing everything was and how I could feel JB hyung really well and how hot it was getting and how uncomfortable it was becoming.

 

"H-hyu...hyung!" I mumbled loudly. JB hyung was suddenly going a little faster and the ache in my lower stomach was so close so close so close. He tightened his hold on my hand and leaned really close to me. So close I felt his lips on my neck.

 

JB hyung suddenly whispered my name and-

 

It came out.

 

The noise I tried to keep in also came out anyway over my hand. I felt hot everywhere, and somewhere specific I felt sticky and uncomfortable. JB hyung was holding my hand a little too tight for a few more seconds before he let my hand go and I could think again.

 

What did we just do? I need another shower.

 

But I couldn't move. The feeling every time when JB hyung and I use our hands and it comes to the point of the ache in my lower stomach and finally to the point where it all comes out, I can never move. I always feel so tired after it.

 

A silence passed. JB hyung didn't move too. But I wanted to. I felt tired but I was getting uncomfortable with him on top of me. With my eyes closed tightly I removed my hand from my mouth and tried to get up when JB hyung suddenly rubbed against me again.

 

It surprised me so much and the feeling from it coming out only a few minutes ago was still there that a strange noise came out again and I fell back on the bed.

 

Wai-wait what is this? Again?

 

"Wait-hyung." I quickly said, trying to pull my hand away from the hold he still had on my hand.

 

He moved again so suddenly and this time my eyes opened.

 

"Wait. What are we doing?" the words came from my mouth. I managed to pull my hand away from his and used both of my free hands to push him up a little off me.

 

"S-stop." I mumbled.

 

Even though he wasn't acting like himself, suddenly rubbing on me again after what we just did, JB hyung didn't waste any time and quickly lifted himself off of me.

 

"Breath Youngjae." he said. So I realized the breath I was holding. He was completely off of me now and I pushed myself up and calmed down. It was too hot. I used both my hands to cover my face.

 

What did we just do?

 

I mean, we've done this before, but JB hyung really is acting different, wanting to do it a different way and even wanting to do it again after the first time.

 

What is this feeling? He suddenly scared me.

 

"Let's stop here." he suddenly said.

 

"No." I was surprised by own words. Just earlier I told him to stop.

 

I'm nervous. So nervous. I'm scared. This is a new feeling. It doesn't feel like how it feels before when we did it with our hands. I don't know this feeling.

 

"Youngjae."

 

"JB hyung."

 

"Hm?"

 

"It...kind of hurts again." I quickly said lowering my head even more, feeling so embarrassed. The ache in my lower stomach was back and I didn't know what to do.

 

"Where hurts?" JB hyung asked. I felt his hand on my arm.

 

"My stomach...below my stomach again." I said, really embarrassed.

 

"Let's use our hands. Like how we usually do it." he mumbled.

 

"Huh?"

 

Is this normal? After doing it already it hurts again?

 

"I'm like you too." suddenly he grabbed my hand and I touched it. I touched him, almost pulling back, but he didn't let me.

 

My heart was beating so fast.

 

"With our hands this time." he said. He moved closer to me. So close that I could lay my head on his shoulder like how we usually do it.

 

Once again we touch, not only our hands, but our other parts. We did it like how we usually do it, using both our hands. My hands were holding us together and JB hyung's hands wrapped around mine.

 

I closed my eyes tight and couldn't keep the strange noises in as it began. Up and down. I tightened my eyes.

 

Quickly I could feel the ache getting more and more uncomfortable.

 

It scared me a little. Suddenly I was scared of my own body.

 

It didn't take long.

 

I called out JB hyung's name in an embarrassing voice and I heard him call out mine too.

 

The room became silent. Only our loud breathing filled the room and we didn't move at all. My head was still on JB hyung's shoulder and his was on mine too. Our hands didn't move as well, with my hands still wrapped around us and his wrapped around mine.

 

What did we just do?

 

My heart was beating really really fast and I didn't know what to do. We have never done it two times before.

 

Ever.

 

My body was acting strange too, so I was a little scared. I was now a little scared of JB hyung and my own body.

 

He let my hands go and I slowly removed my hands and fell down on the bed, my eyes closed tight.

 

What did we do? Why is this so embarrassing! More than usual.

 

I was way past being embarrassed. I was completely embarrassed. More embarrassed than I have ever been before. Even in Jeju. Keeping my hands far away from my face, I quickly used my arms to cover my whole face.

 

There was silence. JB hyung's breathing stopped but I was still trying to calm down.

 

"I'll be back." he suddenly said.

 

I didn't move. I didn't talk.

 

Why did that feel different from usual? How can I ever look at his face ever again? So scary, so embarrassing!

 

I don't know how long I was laying there, my arms covering my face, but soon I heard JB hyung's voice again.

 

"Youngjae. Are you asleep?"

 

I couldn't reply.

 

"I'm going to clean you up. I'm going to turn on the lights." he said.

 

"No." I quickly said.

 

"I can't see if I don't turn on the lights."

 

"I'll do it myself." I quickly said.

 

"Hey."

 

Silence.

 

"Are you mad?" he asked.

 

What? Mad? I'm not mad? I'm not. I'm just-I don't know. That was so strange. It felt different from what always happens.

 

"Youngjae."

 

I knew he was standing over me now, besides the bed. He touched my arm and I flinched.

 

What am I doing? Why am I so embarrassed?

 

Silence.

 

"Are you scared of me now?" he asked.

 

His voice sounded different. JB hyung sounded...nervous. I've heard this voice before.

 

"I'm not." I quickly said.

 

Silence.

 

"Really embarrassed. I can't let you see me." I mumbled.

 

"Why? I've seen you already." he said.

 

Could my face get any hotter?

 

It did.

 

"It's hot." I mumbled.

 

"Let me clean you up." he said.

 

"Don't turn on the lights."

 

I heard a small chuckle and felt the bed move.

 

JB hyung started with my hands first. I kept my eyes closed tight even though the room was dark. He cleaned my hands slowly and didn't say a word.

 

Next he moved to the other sticky place. The place that was touching his place earlier. I covered my face with my hands as he helped me get clean down there.

 

By the end I didn't feel so sticky anymore.

 

"I'm going to go get you new sleeping pants." he said.

 

I didn't say anything.

 

It took a little longer than it should for JB hyung to come back. I was surprised when he did. First he sat at the edge of the bed. Then he helped me get up.

 

"Water." he said, putting the cup to my lips.

 

"W-what...I'm not sick." I quickly said, taking the cup from him.

 

He laughed and I drinked the water. The whole thing. Then sat in silence holding the cup, my eyes still tightly closed.

 

"Here are your pants. Put them on." he said.

 

He took the glass from me and then gave me my pants. I quickly put them on, not getting up once.

 

Silence passed again. The bed moved and I guessed JB hyung was putting the cup on his table. He came back though and the bed moved again.

 

"You're quiet." he suddenly said.

 

My heart skipped a beat.

 

"You hated it?" he asked.

 

I don't...I don't know. I can't hate JB hyung. Even if it feels a little strange...it also feels good. I can't lie. I just need to get used to it. We still haven't done it all.

 

"Sorry." JB hyung suddenly apologized and I quickly opened my eyes, but I still used my hand to cover them.

 

"For what?" I asked.

 

"I scared you." he said.

 

"You didn't."

 

"You're still shaking. It's moving the bed."

 

"You-you don't scare me. It's not like we haven't done this before." I quickly said.

 

But it was new and it surprised me a little that we did it two times all of a sudden. I'm being stupid. Why should this scare me?

 

"Let's go to bed. You have work tomorrow right?" he asked.

 

"Yeah." I replied.

 

"Go in your room. I'll change the sheets." he said.

 

"I'll do it."

 

"Huh?"

 

A short silence passed.

 

"You're doing everything. You go in my room. I'll change these hyung. I want...some time to myself to think." I quickly said.

 

Silence.

 

"Hyung."

 

"Ok." he said.

 

I only got up when the door closed. I opened my eyes again to brightness, staring at the ceiling.

 

"How much more embarrassing can this get?" I rubbed at my face and pulled myself up. It shouldn't have taken me so long to change JB hyung's sheets, but it did anyway because I was still thinking about it all.

 

When it got time for me to go to my room I walked slowly and even stopped at the door and stared into the dark room.

 

"Hyung." I mumbled.

 

"Hm?"

 

"You're not sleeping?" I asked.

 

"I'm not." he said.

 

"I'm coming." I said, walking into the room and closing the door behind me.

 

I slowly went to my usual side and laid down, staring at the ceiling.

 

"We won't do that again."

 

"Huh?" I turned my head to try to see in the dark but my room is darker than JB hyung's. I couldn't see him well.

 

"Because it scared you." he said.

 

"I'm not a child." I said.

 

"Hey. You sound like you want to leave this place now."

 

"I don't."

 

"You-"

 

"Maybe when we were doing it I was a little...but I'm not now. I just can't look at you for a while."

 

"Why?"

 

Why?

 

"Be-because I'm embarrassed." I mumbled.

 

"Youngjae. Stop being embarrsssed. We haven't even done the really embarrassing thing that I want to do with you." he suddenly said.

 

What? He-

 

"But I'm holding myself back. So sorry that it scared you." he said. "But I'm not sorry that we did it." he said.

 

Something really changed all of a sudden.

 

"You...want to do what we learned?" I asked.

 

"I do. Don't you?" he asked.

 

My heart skipped a beat.

 

I do. I want to. Will I be able to? What happened to my confidence in Japan?

 

"Let's just go to sleep." JB hyung suddenly said.

 

Silence.

 

I want to too.

 

"JB hyung."

 

"Go to sleep." he said.

 

"But-"

 

"What is it?" he asked.

 

"I don't hate it." I quickly said.

 

Silence

 

"Doing it with you I don't." I said.

 

Silence.

 

"Because it feels good too." I mumbled this part.

 

Silence.

 

"I'll stop being nervous and we can do it. We can finally do that. Something we haven't done ever in the three years we're together. Before I leave we should."

 

"I never thought I would hear you say it." he said.

 

"I'm ready. I'm nervous and a little scared but I'm ready when you are." I whispered, embarrassed at the words coming out of my own mouth.

 

"Even though you hate me even touching you." he said.

 

"I don't hate it." I quickly said.

 

He sighed.

 

"You've been patient with me all this time hyung I know that. You're always slow for me when I know if you were with a girl you would do more than you are with me. What I hate is...I hate being embarrased but touching and doing other stuff with you hyung...I really don't hate it." I admitted.

 

A hand fell around me.

 

"Sleep." he said.

 

I chuckled. "Ok. You too." I mumbled.

 

He yawned and silence surrounded the room.

 

I closed my eyes and went to sleep.

_____________________________________________________________________________________

 

"Youngjae."

 

The shaking to my shoulder made me groan and push away the hand that was trying to wake me up.

 

"You have to get to work. I'm going to drop you off." JB hyung said. He yawned loudly.

 

"It's not time. My alarm will go off." I groaned.

 

"What are you talking about? It went off a few minutes ago. You were sleeping through it and it woke me up." he said.

 

"What?" I lifted my hand from covering my face.

 

JB hyung yawned and stared down at me.

 

"So I'm waking you up. I don't even have work today." he whined. "Hurry. I'm going to find something to eat."

 

I watched him walk out of my room and sighed.

 

"If I come in there and you're still sleeping I'll-"

 

"Ok umma!" I yelled, laughing loudly. "I'm up!"

 

"Hey! Choi Youngjae. You want me to come back in the room right? Or maybe you want me to really call your mom!" he yelled.

 

I continued laughing and lifted myself up, yawning and stretching wide.

 

I walked out of the room and past JB hyung in the kitchen. I decided to take a fast shower, not even washing my hair.

 

When I came out of the bathroom JB hyung was still in the kitchen.

 

"Hurry." he yelled.

 

I laughed and quickly rushed into the room to find something to wear. When I finished I walked back out and JB hyung was sitting waiting for me.

 

"Did you dry your hair?" he asked, standing up.

 

"I didn't wash it." I replied. "I'm almost late."

 

He sighed and nodded, walking towards the door. I followed him.

 

During the work day I was falling asleep. I wanted to take a rest but I couldn't.

 

When it was finally my lunch break I walked outside with the lunch box Jieun noona made for us. I yawned loudly and walked to my usual spot. First putting my head on the table and calling JB hyung.

 

"Youngjae."

 

"Hyung." I mumbled, yawning.

 

"What is it?" he asked.

 

"Are you home?"

 

"I'm buying some food. We don't have anything. What have you been eating?" he asked.

 

I laughed.

 

"I went to my house." I replied. Usually when JB hyung goes away for a long time or when we don't feel like making anything we go to my house. When we came back from Jeju and I called my mom and told her JB hyung was going away for his job, she told me to come eat at home.

 

She thinks that JB hyung cooks all the time and I never cook. It's true, but sometimes I cook too. Sometimes I help JB hyung. He forces me to help him.

 

"You sound tired. How many more hours do you have?" he asked.

 

I chuckled. "Don't worry, I'm not staying so late today. I hope not. Teacher Park said I can leave early today."

 

"Did he catch you sleeping?" he asked.

 

I laughed. "How did you know?"

 

"I said you sound tired."

 

I nodded and yawned.

 

"Is it because of what we did yesterday night?" he suddenly asked.

 

It woke me. My eyes went a little wide. "What?" I asked.

 

"We've never done it two times. Is that why you're so tired?" he asked.

 

"What? No." I felt my ears going hot. "I'm not. It's not because of that. I'm usually this tired." I mumbled.

 

JB hyung is the only one that can make me embarrassed still. Sometimes I wonder if he knows that and uses it to his advantage.

 

"Youngjae."

 

"Hm?"

 

"Is it your lunch break?" he asked.

 

"Lunch break?"

 

"You're on your lunch break right?" he asked.

 

"Yeah. I'm sitting outside."

 

"The same spot I found you yesterday? Our spot?" he asked.

 

I thought about it.

 

"Hyung. I don't think she's going to come here again. And if she does I'll tell her. Don't worry so much." I said.

 

"Do you need lunch?" he suddenly asked, not saying anything about what I just said.

 

"Huh?"

 

"I'm going to bring you lunch." he said.

 

"It's ok. The new assistant Jieun noona brought us lunch today. She's a new assistant to teacher Kim did I tell you? She suddenly started when we came back from Jeju. She sometimes works for the other teachers too."

 

Silence.

 

"JB hyung?"

 

"I'm listening. Something just came up sorry." he mumbled. He did sound like he was doing something.

 

"Do you want to talk later?" I asked.

 

"No. Talk." he said.

 

"She suddenly brought us lunch boxes one day and she's started doing it more. She said she's taking cooking classes so she wants for us to taste her food. Maybe I should take a class too. Her food is really good." I laughed.

 

More Silence.

 

"JB hyung?"

 

"Eat your lunch. I have to go." he suddenly said.

 

"Huh? Is something wrong? Are you still shopping?" I asked.

 

"No. I'm home. Hurry and eat and get back to work." he said.

 

I chuckled and nodded. "I was calling to ask if you can pick me up after work. I'm so tired I want to go to sleep as soon as I get home."

 

"Hey. You don't have to call me. I'll pick you up anyway." he said.

 

I chuckled, smiling wide. "That's why you're my favorite hyung!" I yelled.

 

"Hey! Choi Youngjae. You're being so loud in my ear." he said.

 

"What? Did you turn into Jackson hyung?" I asked, still laughing.

 

"Hey."

 

"Sorry. I'm sorry." I apologized, still laughing.

 

A short silence passed. It still sounded like JB hyung was doing something.

 

"Did you hear me?" he suddenly asked.

 

"Huh?"

 

"I said I thought you wouldn't want to see me. Because of yesterday. You were scared right?"

 

Once again he was bringing it up.

 

"Hyung."

 

"Hm?"

 

"Do you do this because you think I forget?" I asked.

 

"What are you talking about?"

 

"You...you're always bringing it up again. You always ask me if I remember. I do remember. I won't forget. But if you keep asking me it makes me embarrassed."

 

"Why?" he suddenly asked.

 

"Huh?"

 

"Why are you embarrassed every time? Even though we've done it a few times now. Wait a minute Youngjae. It's the door."

 

"What?" I couldn't hear him. "Hyung-"

 

"Youngjae? Choi Youngjae! Is the food good?"

 

I quickly turned around. Jieun noona was standing behind me. She was smiling wide.

 

"Teacher Park said it's the best yet. I've only made two lunch boxes for him though." she laughed.

 

"Jieun noona." I said loudly.

 

"You looked so surprised to see me. Is it your mom?" she asked.

 

"Ah, no I'm talking to-"

 

I realized the dial tone was going off on the phone. JB hyung hung up on me.

 

What's with him all of a sudden?

 

"Youngjae." Jieun noona called my name and I snapped from my thoughts and turned off my phone.

 

"It was Jaebum hyung. I was asking him to pick me up after work." I said.

 

"He's back? Can I meet him?" she looked excited.

 

It's only been a month since she started working in our teacher's office for teacher Kim. She's not in the teachers room all the time but when I do see her we have a lot to talk about.

 

When I showed her JB hyung's picture she said he was cute and even asked me how old he was. I didn't know how to feel about it and I still don't.

 

It's not like I can tell her that JB hyung is mine. But maybe I should tell her that JB hyung is dating right now. But what's wrong with JB hyung all of a sudden? What should I do?

 

"Youngjae. Hey. What do you keep on thinking about so hard? Come on. Tell your noona." she patted my shoulder and sat besides me.

 

"JB hyung has someone already." I quickly said.

 

"What?" she yelled loudly. "He already has a girlfriend? Ah...did you find out I liked him?" she asked.

 

I turned to look at her.

 

So she really does like him. JB hyung is really popular.

 

"Ah, it's ok. But I still want to meet him so introduce me okay? He's so handsome." she squealed and I laughed.

 

"JB hyung is really handsome." I repeated.

 

"Ah, you said you were asking him to pick you up? How about call him and tell him not to. Tonight the teachers are having a welcome party for me. We have to go drinking." she frowned.

 

Just like me, she doesn't like drinking much either.

 

"What? It's tonight?" I asked. "It's already a month. Why are they having it so late?"

 

She nodded. "I just heard them talking about it. Even teacher Park is going to come." she sighed. "We're all going together after work."

 

"I can't go." I quickly said.

 

"Come on. Not even for my welcome party? Don't worry I'll make sure we get drinks that isn't alcohol." she laughed.

 

At that time I knew I had to call JB hyung. But in the end he didn't pick up. So I left him a sms and hoped he got it before he suddenly came to the school.

 

At the end of the work day I got a message back from JB hyung. He told me to call him if I needed someone to pick me up.

 

I could only smile at the message.

 

I really didn't want to go to the drinking party. Even if it was for Jieun noona. By the end of the day I was really forced to go. Even teacher Park was going.

 

I sat down in between teacher Kim and Jieun noona.

 

I've said it before that I don't really drink, but it is rude not to drink. So I sat staring at my bottle of soju and quickly started to eat so they don't realize that I'm not drinking with them.

 

"Welcome Jieun!" they all yelled.

 

I laughed and stared at them. They were acting drunk even before they started drinking.

 

"Youngjae-ah is about to leave us. This means Jieun you can't keep leaving us. You'll become all our assistants." teacher Park was already getting drunk. When I do go to the drinking parties, it's always teacher Park that gets drunk first, then its teacher Kim, and one by one they all get drunk.

 

I continued staring at my drink, playing with it.

 

At least they weren't forcing me to drink.

 

I saw Jieun noona drink her bottle a little and put it down in front of her.

 

"So are you ready to go to military service? My younger brother just came back. He doesn't even want to talk about it." she laughed.

 

"What? Why? What's with him. I remember those days were the best days of my life. All we talked about was-"

 

"The girl groups! The girl singers. y!" another teacher interrupted teacher Park and they both started laughing loudly.

 

"What are you going to do about your girlfriend Youngjae?" teacher Kim asked.

 

"Huh? My girlfriend?"

 

I pictured JB hyung.

 

He would be mad if I called him that.

 

I laughed loudly.

 

"Hey! What's wrong with you suddenly?" Jieun noona hit my shoulder and I laughed even harder because now I was imagining JB hyung with long hair and a dress.

 

He would be really mad.

 

"Do you think he's imagining his girlfriend?" I heard Jieun ask.

 

"No. no. My girlfriend is okay. I'll miss her and...she even said she'll miss me. But the sooner I go I can hurry and come back right?" I asked.

 

"So you do have a girlfriend!" teacher Kim yelled.

 

I imagined JB hyung again.

 

"Yeah...a very funny one." I chuckled.

 

"Hey. Did you drink thinking of your girlfriend? Is she pretty? Show us a picture."

 

I lifted my head and stared at them. They all had a curious look on their faces.

 

"I-don't have one."

 

"What? Youngjae! Choi Youngjae! You don't want to show us your pretty girlfriend." teacher Park patted my shoulder. "Don't think of us as older right now. I'm not boss either. Show us." he winked.

 

"I-I can't. She doesn't like me to show her picture." I lied, already feeling my heart beating so fast.

 

"What!" they whined and turned back to drinking and laughing about something else.

 

"I'm going to go use the bathroom." I glanced at my drink and stood up to go to the bathroom.

 

All of a sudden I just wanted to go home. I wanted to see JB hyung and laugh at his stupid jokes.

 

I stood inside the bathroom and called him.

 

"Hello?"

 

"You sound like you're sleeping."

 

"You don't usually call me this much. What's wrong?" he asked.

 

I laughed loudly.

 

"Nothing. What are you doing hyung?"

 

"I'm just watching something on tv."

 

"Ah..." I chuckled.

 

"What's wrong?" he asked again.

 

"Can you come pick me up?"

 

"Already?" It sounded like he was getting up. I heard coco barking too.

 

"Coco's there?" I asked.

 

"Yeah. Mark brought her earlier. That's why I had to hang up all of a sudden earlier. He said it's his turn with her but since she's been with your mom so he will give you one day. More like one night with her."

 

"I want to come home now." I quickly said.

 

"To see coco?" he yawned.

 

"To see you and coco."

 

Silence.

 

"JB hyung? Are you still there. Don't hang up on me again."

 

"I'm coming. Make sure you wear your jacket. I looked at the weather. It's really cold tonight. You have your jacket right?" he asked.

 

"I have it." I laughed.

 

"I'm coming. I'll call you when I get there."

 

"Ok. See you hyung." I chuckled.

 

"Yeah."

 

I stood in the bathroom smiling. Someone opened the door and asked if I was ok because I had a stupid look on my face.

 

I don't even care. They are all drunk even though it's a restraunt.

 

I walked out of the bathroom and back towards my seat. I was happy, smiling wide and thinking of JB hyung when I heard a familiar voice.

 

I lifted my head only to stop walking.

 

JB hyung's ex girlfriend. Sitting next to Jieun noona. In my spot.

 

How?

 

"There he is. Youngjae!"

 

I froze.

 

I didn't think I would see her again since she didn't come to my eating spot earlier today.

 

What's she doing here? JB hyung is going to be mad. I can't talk to her.

 

"Hurry. What are you doing? Jinhee's here. She said she knows you right?" Jieun noona called out so loud that I was forced to walk over. I sat awkwardly back in my spot now squished between teacher Kim and JB hyung's ex girlfriend, Jinhee.

 

That was her name. JB hyung never told me. I never knew her name.

 

"Youngjae-ah. Is this your girlfriend? She's so pretty." teacher Park winked at me from across the table.

 

"She's not." I quickly said.

 

"So you have a girlfriend?" Jinhee suddenly asked.

 

She was smiling wide, acting friendly. Jieun noona was smiling wide too and I saw teacher Kim listening in too.

 

Should I talk to her? But I told JB hyung that I would-

 

"I think you and Jieun together is cute. You said you have the same interest right?" Jinhee's voice pulled me from my thoughts and I stared at her.

 

"Youngjae and Jieun! They should get married!" teacher Park suddenly yelled. "They both come to me to talk about same thing. They both want to be music therapist. They both want to travel. They both really love music and can play piano." he said loudly.

 

"I think it's a good match. Just let your girlfriend down easy." teacher Kim said, laughing loudly.

 

"What? Don't do that. It's rude. Youngjae loves his girlfriend right?"

 

"But he won't even show us her picture."

 

"She's a mystery girl. Youngjae's girlfriend. As long as he shows her to his mom. We don't need to see her beauty." teacher Park laughed.

 

"What...Maybe I have a boyfriend." Jieun noona suddenly said.

 

"You don't!" Jinhee said.

 

Everyone started laughing.

 

I sat staring at my half empty bottle of soju. I wondered who drank it.

 

"What's your last name?"

 

I wasn't paying attention.

 

"Youngjae? It's Choi." Jieun noona suddenly said.

 

I turned to look at them.

 

"Choi Youngjae and Choi Jieun. It's so cute!" Jinhee squealed and I watched as Jieun noona hit her and they both laughed

 

"I didn't think she was talking about you when she said Youngjae, but it makes sense because you also work in the teacher's room right?" Jinhee suddenly asked me.

 

I stared at her.

 

"Hey! Youngjae-ah. What's with that face? Don't be so rude. I thought she was your friend. Answer her." Jieun noona said.

 

"Ah..." I stared.

 

"It's ok. We only met each other once actually a few years ago. His roommate was my boyfriend. Jaebum." she said.

 

"JB? Your roommate is Jinhee's boyfriend?"

 

"His past girlfriend." I quickly said.

 

They both turned to me.

 

Jinhee laughed. "Yeah. We broke up. It was rough. But I still care about him. I miss him. Have you seen him? He's so handsome."

 

I turned away as the two girls started gossiping about JB hyung.

 

My heart was beating fast and I didn't feel good that they were talking about him so I stood up quickly.

 

"My ride is here. I have to go." I lied.

 

"Ah. Leaving so soon?" Jieun noona whined.

 

"Youngjae's leaving?" teacher Park asked. "You have a ride?"

 

"I do."

 

"Is it Jaebum oppa?" Jinhee suddenly asked.

 

"Your roommate is picking you up?" teacher Park asked.

 

I stared at them all, and suddenly made eye contact with Jinhee.

 

"No." I lied. "I have to go. They're waiting." I lied again.

 

Three lies already and I felt so terrible. I stood outside of the restraunt away from the door so I couldn't be seen. I stared at JB hyung's number on my phone, my heart beating so fast.

 

I lied. Why did I lie?

 

I continued staring at my phone.

 

"But JB hyung can't find out that she's here." I mumbled, quickly calling him. He picked up at the second ring.

 

"I'm almost there."

 

"Actually, I'm not at the restraunt anymore. I'm near the park." I started walking quickly.

 

"The park?" he asked.

 

"Yeah. You know the park that's near the-"

 

"I know. Why are you there?" he asked.

 

Silence.

 

"Youngjae. Did something happen?" JB hyung asked.

 

"I'm just really tired." I yawned.

 

"Stay on the phone. I'm almost there." he said.

 

So I did.

 

JB hyung started talking about a few things. I made it to the park and sat down on a swing. He continued mumbling something, then he started humming a song, and before I knew it I could see his car.

 

He stopped the car, got out, and walked towards me.

 

"This has happened before right?" he asked, laughing.

 

I chuckled and nodded.

 

He sat down on the swing next to me.

 

"Are you drunk?" he asked.

 

I laughed and shook my head no. "I didn't drink anything."

 

He nodded. "What's wrong?" he asked after a long silence.

 

"Did you leave coco by herself?" I quickly asked.

 

He paused and stared at me.

 

"She's fine." he said.

 

I yawned and nodded.

 

"Let's go sleep hyung. I'm sleepy." I stood up and stretched wide, cracking my knuckles and yawning.

 

"You're really tired." he said.

 

"I am." I laughed and he chuckled and put his arm around my shoulder, pulling me to his car.

_____________________________________________________________________________________

 

I decided not to tell JB hyung about what happened at the restraunt. I didn't want him to think about her and have bad feelings again.

 

Also, I just couldn't forgot what she said. The same words that keep gong through my head since yesterday.

 

She still cares about him. She still misses him.

 

I didn't feel good about those words at all.

_____________________________________________________________________________________

 

I sat in my seat in the teacher's room and opened my convenience store lunch box. All of a sudden this morning JB hyung forced me to go to the convenience store before he dropped me off and he bought two lunch boxes. One for me and one for him.

 

He made me choose my favorite and then pushed me away when I tried to pay for mine.

 

I smiled at the lunch box and remembered what he said.

 

"If you're hungry during lunch, then tell me so we can make something."

 

I don't know why he suddenly wanted to get me a lunch box but it make laugh anyway.

 

I quickly finished eating. The day was getting so busy that I didn't even have time to go out and eat at the usual spot. By the time I knew it it was dark outside and it was getting very late.

 

I stretched out my fingers and cracked them, yawning loudly and drinking my americano.

 

JB hyung told me he was going to be late too. But when I told him I was going to call Mark hyung to pick me up he suddenly said he will come pick me up, even if he had to leave early.

 

I asked if he could do that and he said he could.

 

At least tomorrow is a day off for both of us. I haven't seen Mark hyung or the guys in a long time. I wonder how BamBam and Yugyeom are doing with school.

 

I yawned again and continued my work. I just had a few more papers to finish for teacher Park and I could leave.

 

I focused all my attention on the work and before I knew it I finished.

 

"I'm done!" I yelled.

 

"Hey! Just because your done..." Jieun noona groaned and I laughed loudly.

 

"I can leave now. I'm so tired." I whined.

 

"At least we have two days off."

 

I nodded and smiled, quickly taking my phone out and calling JB hyung. The phone rang but he didn't pick up so I quickly sent him a message. I smiled and started getting my stuff ready.

 

"It's cold out today too. Remember your jacket." Jieun said.

 

I laughed. She sometimes acts like my sister and it's funny.

 

I put on my jacket, collected all my stuff, put my shoulder bag on and waved goodbye. They all looked annoyed that I was leaving first. Actually some of the other teachers left but some had to stay to finish their work.

 

They were all the teachers that came to Jieun's welcome drinking party yesterday.

 

I called JB hyung again.

 

This time the phone rang once and he picked up. He sounded like he was just dancing.

 

"Are you ready to be picked up?" he asked.

 

"You sound like you're still working. I can call Mark hyung-"

 

"No. I'm on my way."

 

"Hyung..."

 

"I'm already on my way." he said.

 

I chuckled and sighed, sitting down at my spot outside.

 

"Don't rush." I mumbled. "I could have taken the bus if you're so jealous of Mark hyung."

 

"Hey..." he mumbled.

 

After all we've done together I can't believe JB hyung is still jealous of Mark hyung.

 

"You know you can't keep me away from Mark hyung right?" I chuckled.

 

"Who said I am?" he asked.

 

I laughed loudly.

 

"Sit and wait for me. I'm on my way." he said.

 

"Ok. See you Jaebum-ah." I laughed and waited for him to scold me for using his name.

 

Silence.

 

"Hey. What are you suddenly trying to do?" he asked.

 

I chuckled. "What are you talking about?" I asked.

 

I heard him sigh. "Just wait for me."

 

I laughed and nodded. "I'm waiting for you. Call me when you get here."

 

"Right."

 

He hung up and I smiled at my phone for a few moments.

 

JB hyung has been acting a little cuter recently. He's getting so jealous at everything.

 

With a smile on my face I opened a game and started playing.

_____________________________________________________________________________________

 

I waited a long time.

 

I'm usually focused on my game when I start. But I couldn't stop thinking about JB hyung. He said he was on his way. It was almost an hour ago.

 

So where is he?

 

When more time passed I finally got up and looked towards the spot JB hyung usually comes from.

 

Did he go inside?

 

"But I would see him. He would call me too."

 

I pulled up his number and stared at it. Then I looked at my messages. Finally I started walking towards the front of the school where JB hyung usually parks his car.

 

I didn't even get halfway when I saw him. He was standing near the front. He was talking to someone.

 

I stopped walking when I saw Jinhee noona.

 

They were talking. JB hyung didn't look mad, but he didn't look happy either. I stopped calling him and turned around to walk back to my seat.

 

They need this time to talk.

 

I told myself that but something really hurt seeing them together again. The girl JB hyung likes. The girl he fell in love with.

 

I closed my eyes and put my head on the table.

 

I didn't really think about anything. I didn't know how to feel or why I felt so bad or if I should feel so bad.

 

I told myself before that if JB hyung finds a girl he likes, I will back away. Because JB hyung needs a girl. His parents want a girl. JB hyung really likes-

 

"Is that Im Jaebum?"

 

I lifted my head at Jieun noona's voice and turned to where she suddenly walked to.

 

It turns out JB hyung was standing behind me.

 

How long has he been there?

 

"Youngjae-ah told me so much about you. Jinhee told me a lot too. You are very handsome in person." she said loudly.

 

JB hyung was standing there.

 

Jieun noona isn't very shy at all. She knows almost every student in the music department already when she's started working only a month. Even I don't know every student.

 

"Are you here to pick up Youngjae? Hey. Choi Youngjae. Don't make him wait." Jieun noona said loudly.

 

I quickly stood up, chuckling and nodding.

 

She really reminds me of my sister.

 

"I'll leave you two to go home. Are you as tired as I am?" she joked with me and I laughed loudly and shook my head yes.

 

"Bye." she waved at me. "Bye Im Jaebum." she waved at JB hyung.

 

I lifted my head and looked at him. He wasn't really looking at me.

 

I wondered what he talked to Jinhee noona about.

 

"Are you ready to go hyung? I'm so tired!" I said loudly and yawned even louder.

 

JB hyung just stood there. I stared at him. "What's wrong hyung?" I asked, knowing what was wrong.

 

He probably wants to talk about Jinhee noona. I want to know what they talked about too.

 

"You said you wouldn't talk to her again."

 

I know this voice. Well, he's not screaming but it sounds even scarier when he's not.

 

He's angry.

 

"I didn't know she was going to be there hyung. It was a welcome party for Jieun noona I couldn't tell her to leave."

 

He didn't say anything.

 

I was surprised he was mad about that.

 

"Why didn't you tell me? Is that why you wanted to leave early?" he asked.

 

"You're mad at me because she suddenly appeared at the party?" I asked.

 

"You said you wouldn't talk to her." he said angrily.

 

"Why are you mad at me hyung? It's not like I told her to come. We-we should go. We shouldn't-"

 

Shouldn't what?

 

Fight?

 

Even when JB hyung got angry and yelled at me for saying his love is a joke before, it wasn't as bad as this. This time I'm a little annoyed too.

 

Why won't he listen to what I have to say? Why is he so mad at me?

 

"I told you Youngjae. I know her. She says all these things..." he stopped talking and sighed.

 

"Let's go." he said turning around.

 

My heart was beating so fast. I wasn't scared, but I was a little annoyed.

 

He said not to talk to her but he was talking to her. And what does he mean she says things? What did she say? I didn't even really talk to her yesterday.

 

We both walked in silence.

 

I couldn't stop thinking about how angry JB hyung was. He didn't yell at all and I could tell he was more angry then when he got before.

 

We finally reached the car. I slowly got in, putting my bag in the back seat and turning to face the front.

 

"You told her you have a girlfriend." he suddenly said.

 

I turned to him and stared. "What?"

 

"She said you have a girlfriend. So was that girl your girlfriend?" she asked.

 

"What?" I said again.

 

"Everyone in the teacher's room said you two get along so well and have the same interest and she's even met your mom and visited your house. Everyone wants you to get married."

 

"Jieun noona?" I said, shocked.

 

JB hyung didn't say anything. He just started the car and I stared at him, still shocked.

 

"What are you talking about hyung?" I asked.

 

He didn't say anything.

 

JB hyung can be really annoying when he's mad or annoyed. He ignores you completely, acting as if you're not there. It's even more annoying when he just goes straight to sleep.

 

"JB hyung...what's going on?" I finally asked him. He wouldn't even look at me. "Why are you suddenly so mad? Whatever she said it's a lie." I tried to tell him.

 

"Then why did you tell everyone you had a girlfriend?" she asked.

 

He's acting so childish. What really happened in China? Why is he acting so strange?

 

I stared at him. "Do you think I have a girlfriend hyung? Me?" I asked him.

 

He didn't answer.

 

I got more annoyed. "Aren't you my boyfriend hyung?"

 

"Then who's your girlfriend?" he asked loudly.

 

"You think I have a girlfriend?" my voice got higher. "I thought you said she lies! Why are you believing her over me hyung?" I yelled.

 

He turned to look at me.

 

He looked surprised. I don't usually get angry. Actually I never get angry. If you ask Yugyeom he will tell you. Even when he did the most annoying things I never got angry at him. When I do I never yell, I always keep it inside. JB hyung has never seen me yell before.

 

But I felt frustrated. I suddenly felt like I was already losing JB hyung to Jinhee noona. I said I would let him go if he didn't want to be with me anymore, but not if he believes her lies.

 

Breathing loudly I turned away. I've never been so mad at him before.

 

Not even when I thought he was lying to me when he confessed.

 

"I'm not believing her." JB hyung suddenly asked. "You lied to me about seeing her."

 

"I didn't lie. I just didn't tell you. I didn't tell you because of this. You still like her hyung. So why are we doing this? You still want to be with Jinhee noona so go be with her."

 

The car suddenly stopped.

 

"What are you-mmphm"

 

I was pulled into such an aggressive kiss. I was so unprepared that our teeth hit and it hurt, but JB hyung still kissed me anyway. I couldn't do anything back because he had control. Usually I'm slow anyway.

 

I tried pushing him off, thinking of where we were but JB hyung really didn't want to let me go.

 

I wouldn't say I'm weak. I'm strong too. I don't know how suddenly JB hyung was stronger than me.

 

I pushed him again and he held me tighter and grabbed my wrist. When I tried pulling away he held tight.

 

After it became too much I used all my strength and finally pushed him away.

 

"Think of where we are hyung." I said, looking down at my shoes. I could feel my whole face was hot. My ears, and my body. Everything was hot and my heart was beating so fast.

 

I was scared.

 

It's the first time ever I've been really scared of JB hyung. Not just a little scared like how I felt after what we did yesterday, but really scared.

 

Ever since he's come back from China he's been acting strange. No, since he came back from service he's been more aggressive. He told me he used to do that stuff and think of me while he was away.

 

JB hyung wants to do it.

 

It's been four years.

 

With a girl he could have done it already, but because it's me I'm holding him back and pushing him away.

 

We sat in silence for a little while.

 

He finally started the car again and we sat in silence. The whole drive back was in silence. My heart stopped beating so fast. I wondered if JB hyung's heart was beating as fast as mine.

 

I wondered if he felt bad about almost forcing me.

 

I wondered if I should feel bad about lying to him.

 

Maybe I should have told him what happened and what I said. Maybe I should tell him now.

 

When the car stopped in front of the apartment where he usually parks, we didn't move at all. JB hyung turned off the car and we sat in silence.

 

"Uh..."

 

"Sorry."

 

I quickly turned to him and he was staring at me. He had a guilty look on his face.

 

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't get mad when I know that it's all lies. I shouldn't force you ever. She lied to me and I believed her and blamed you. I guess I was thinking too much. First Mark and then this new co-worker that gets along with you so well. I've never acted this way before at all. I don't know why I'm getting so jealous when I think about you now."

 

He admitted it!

 

JB hyung is really becoming more jealous. He apologized first.

 

I smiled and nodded.

 

"I should have told you she came by the restraunt. I just didn't want you to get mad and you found out anyway." I chuckled. "When I said girlfriend I was talking about you hyung. I couldn't say boyfriend right? They asked if I was in a relationship and I answered them but I was thinking of you as my girlfriend. I don't like Jieun noona hyung. I don't like Mark hyung like I like you. Don't be mad."

 

He stared at me.

 

I laughed and hit his shoulder.

 

"What..." I mumbled.

 

"What?" he started laughing.

 

"Our first fight and it's about something so stupid like this." I mumbled.

 

We both started laughing.

 

"Actually, I think Jieun noona likes you not me." I giggled.

 

"She doesn't." JB hyung suddenly put a hand in my hair.

 

I looked at him and he rubbed my hair.

 

"No work tomorrow." he said.

 

I nodded.

 

"Can we?" he asked.

 

My heart skipped a beat and I stared at him.

 

Slowly I looked away too shy and nodded.

 

JB hyung suddenly pulled me in a hug.

 

"What...hyung..." I mumbled.

 

He's really not acting like himself.

 

So for that night we tried even more things. The rubbing against each other, I had to lay down again and even though I felt uncomfortable I was...happy to do it with JB hyung. We did it two times again.

 

After that I really thought I wouldn't be able to look JB hyung in the face ever.

 

But the next morning we got up and went out together to buy some more food.

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