California, June 2016

Jiyong didn’t even surprise. He knew that he deserved that kind of rejection from Taeyeon. He knew that it was Taeyeon’s number, and it was her voice. So it was defintely not a wrong number he dialed. Taeyeon just didn’t want to see him.

It still hurt, but he expected that. It didn’t make it less hurt. But he somehow could handle it anyway.

Should I just stop bothering her?

He lost his confidence. He wanted to go back.

Maybe I should stop being selfish. Maybe she would happy with someone else.

Jiyong locked the dark hotel room. He sat on the floor while leaning his head on the bedside. He tried to ease his heart. It failed anyway.

 I want to be with her but she doesn’t want to be with me.

He closed his eyes and felt a burning sensation on his chest.

 So should I just give up?

Itaewon, January 2004

“Here comes the food kids,”

“Uwaaa thank you eomonim,” a bright voice came from a girl, she clapped her hands in excitement looking at the boiled stew, steamed rice, and many side dishes on the table.

“Thank you for the food, Eomma,” the boy used the chopstick and started to pick his favorite food when his older sister slapped his hand, “Jiyong-ah, let the guest first,”

“Aigoo, arasseo,”

“Taeyeon-ah, which one do you want?” said the older girl.

“Everything looks so delicious, Unnie,” her eyes were sparkling.

“This, this, you can try all of this baby,” Jiyong and Dami’s mother put tofu, chicken, and kimchi to her rice bowl.

“Thank you eomonim,” she smiled ear to ear

“Eomma, noona, it’s unfair, you all like Taeyeon more than me,” Jiyong pouted

“Of course, because playing with Taeyeon is more fun,” Dami sticked out her tongue. “Taeyeon-ah, you can play here anytime you want, right eomma?”

Her mother nodded while smiling, “ Sure, sweetheart,”

“But after she become a singer she will be very busy Noona,” said Jiyong. Taeyeon and Jiyong were still pursuing their dream, become a singer, and they trained together in SM entertainment.

“Anytime, she can still come here in her spare time,” Dami persisted.

Taeyeon chuckled, “Ne, eomma, unnie, even when I have already became a singer in the future, I will come here,”

“That’s my sister!” Dami pinched her cheeks. They laughed together.

Seoul, June 2016

When she remembered about those old days, she wanted to go back.

She used to come to Jiyong’s house. Actually she came just a few times, but it felt like she was home. Her hometown was in Jeonju, three hours from Seoul, so J