“maybe you put it at another place?” Donghae tried to calm the situation.

“I'm the guy who very organized and disciplined. The note book will always be there. I will never bring it anywhere or move. The note book contains my secret. Practically very important. So it will always be there. Except ... there was someone who took it.” Eunhyuk stopped talking. He starting panic. “We must look for its Donghae-ssi. If not it would be very dangerous if the diary fell into another hands.”

“calm Down. First, we are lookingthat note book at this house." Donghae said, and they try to find the diary.

After three hours passed. Donghae and Eunhyuk had searched every corner of the house. Eunhyuk’s apartment looks messy. They searched and keep searched. But they didn’t get anything. What they were looking for was not there in the house. After a weary search, they give up and tidy the apartment to remove the traces, then go home without bringing outcome.

“It's weird. I never clumsy, including important things like the note book.” Eunhyuk talking when they have returned to Donghae’s apartment.

“maybe, you aren’t put haphazardly. But you lose your memory. Maybe,you have brought the note book to a place.And now you don’t remember where you put it.” Donghae talking about the possibility that the note bookis located. And Eunhyuk nodded affirmatively likely happens.

Eunhyuk looked at Donghae who was changing his clothes into pajamas. feel comfortable and close with a younger man. Eunhyuk learn one more thing about Donghae. This man, could be a cold and stubborn,but also kind and gentle. This guy can read and act on his place. like today. Donghae is so firm and cold made the older man chill, but also be able to soothe him when he panicked. He little bit was grateful because his helper was not too bad.Eunhyuk smiled with his thoughts about Donghae.

Donghae lying on his bed and pulled his blanket. Trying to take a break. Today is not an ordinary day for him. Many things which hepassed. He needs a break to get through the day tomorrow.

When Donghae will close his eyes, his doorbell rang. Donghae groaned and was forced to wake up and open the door because Eunhyuk is just a soul might not be touching a doorknob.

Donghae went and opened the door with a laziness because of exhausted. But when he knew who it was, Donghae eyes which is glazed turned into a bright and cheerful appear on his face. Make Eunhyuk who had been watching, wondering who was come, then throw Donghae’s face turned 180 degrees.

“Hae-ah, did I disturbing you?” A Voice heard when the door was open.

"Siwon-ah, a-anyi, please in." Donghae said and invited man who named Siwon enter his apartment. “what bring you here?” Donghae ask Siwon when they already sit.

“I just wanted to tell you if tomorrow I want to go to galleries and buy some of your paintings for my new office." Siwon said

"Siwon-ah, why don’t youjust call me? No need to bother to come here and see me." Donghae said, and handed a glass of orange juice to Siwon.

“Cause I miss you. I want to see you." Siwon said, made Donghae's face flushed.

Eunhyuk who saw them both from earlier and see how Donghae’s face flushed instantly, understand who is Siwon actually. This man is very handsome, tall with a dimple in his cheek whenever he smiled,  all women or men who are gay will immediately enthralled.

After 30minutes, Siwon left and Donghae back lying in his bed with face and a different mood than before.

Eunhyuk joined Donghae lying in bed, he lying beside Donghae. Although he only a soul, he hasn’t body, but he shared feelings with Donghae. So that he could feel that Donghae feel exhausted. Eunhyuk looked at Donghae who lay beside him.

“is he your crush? That man who called siwon.” Eunhyuk asked Donghae, the younger man facing the older man, and nodded.

Donghae move his position. Looked at his bedroom ceiling. “Siwon is someone that is difficult to reach, i just can admire him from far, Eunhyuk-ssi.”

“Call me hyuk, and I'll call you Hae. We remove the formality between us." Eunhyuk said make Donghae chuckled.

“Hae-ah, can I ask you something?" Eunhyuk said. And donghae nodded. Don't take his eyes off on the ceiling in his room.

“since when you realize that you are gay?” Eunhyuk asked. Make Donghae surprised, never thought that question will out of the soul’s mouth was that one. “it's okay if you do not want to answer it. I just...curious." Eunhyuk said, scared if the young man resentful with that question.

Donghae sighed. “when I entered high school so many women are attracted with me. They tried to tempt and ask me for date. But only one person who attracted my attention.” Donghae said. Still staring at the ceiling of his room.

“And that person is a man. Since that timeI realized that I was not an ordinary guy. There was something different about myself. I closed myself and in my world there are only painting and writing. At that time I hid everything. Dating various girls to cover my disorders. But that man, the man who attracted my attention, you can call him my first love,hit me, that being different is not something that should be in hiding. When I graduated from high school. I told my dad and my sister about my shortcomings.” Donghae stopped talking and then drew a breath.

“what happens next?” Eunhyuk asked curious because Donghae stop talking and be quiet for too long

“That day was become the worst day I've ever experienced in my life. More terrible than the day when my mother died." Donghae said with a cheerful tone, make the soul who laying in his side didn’t understand and was struck with the cheerful tone in the sad story that Donghae tell.

“sorry I didn’t mean to make you recall your bad memories." Eunhyuk said, start to feel guilty. But Donghae just laughed and looked at Eunhyuk.

“i don’t need your apology. It has passed hyuk. Sometimes I remember it because I wanted to laugh at myself.” Donghae laugh, but Eunhyuk feel increasingly guilty to leverage it.

“Is that man Siwon?” Eunhyuk ask because his desire of knowledge about the man who helped him is enormous.

Donghae shook his head to answer his questions. “No he isn’t. That man, my first love. He was... died on the day that I confessed to my father that I was gay.”

Eunhyuk like struck by lightning to hear it. The young man beside him was turned to face the harsh reality so much. This man has a strong enough reason why he was cold and stubborn. Eunhyuk little bit grateful he was born in a happy family. Although, now he is in a state that doesn’t deserve the grateful but he learned something in this state.

“I'm going to sleep, tomorrow we have to face many more things." Donghae said breaking the silence that occurred between them.

Donghae turned his back to Eunhyuk. He felt that Eunhyuk feel sorry for his. Donghae don’t know somehow Eunhyuk’s sorry feeling made him feel comfortable. Donghae closed his eyes, just try to forget what they talking before.

Eunhyuk looked at Donghae's back. Feel pity and compassion for him. Eunhyuk wanted to hug this man. Like he hugging Minho when Minho facing a problem. But Eunhyuk wasn’t entitled and afraid. Afraid when he hugged this man, this man would be angry because he don’t want to be pitied.

Eunhyuk sighed. He noted in his brain to always be grateful and thankful to Donghae because of the difficult life of this young man lived, he still wants to help his to live.

And after a few minutes they were drowned in their sleep.

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a/n: like i promisse before, part 2. sorry for the failed angst :"(( comment is a MUST!!

will update next chapter next week, be patient key?