FLASHBACK CONTINUED

After school finished I got on the bus which is where I am now. I saw Josh sitting in the sit we were sitting this morning and he beckoned me over to sit with him. I walked down the bus to go sit next to him and somebody stuck their foot out and tripped me. I fell dropping my skateboard and bag, which now has everything spilling out of it. I look up and here laughter. I look around the bus and see that everyone is laughing, including Josh. I saw Josh high five one of the douchebags I had to sit next to in the morning.

We told you who would ever like a freak like you?

Yeah freak, worthless, unwanted, waste.

Tears welled up in my eyes blurring my vision but I quickly wiped them away. I looked at Josh in the eyes and I glared at him. He looked back at me with scared eyes. I walked to the back of the bus where there was an empty bus seat and sat on it smiling with satisfaction. I put my headphones on and my IPod on shuffle. I sat there staring out the window just wishing that I could leave this hell so I could get home and be happy in my room alone. After a half hour bus journey, I take out my skateboard and ride it home.

When I get home I open the door to hear shouting. I always have to come home to this. I walk in further and see my older brother and Mum shout at each other over the stupidest things. I walk to the kitchen and grab an apple, as I start to eat it my Mum finally notices that I’m home.

“Why are you so late? School finishes at 3:30, Why are you home at 4:00?” She screams at me with her menacing eyes. She looks as if she might murder me but I know she won’t, It would just be a minor bruise. I sigh and reply

“Mum I have to catch the bus then I skated home from the bus stop.” I hold up my skateboard to show her I wasn’t lying.

“How do I know that you’re telling the truth? Now tell me the truth, Why are you so late?” She screams at me. She’s always doing this. She walks closer to me and I stand my ground. I know there’s no use in running away. The punishment will be a lot worse if I did.

“Mum I’m telling the truth,” I assure her. My older brother yells at her about wanting to go to some girl’s house for a sleepover and draws my Mums attention back to him, letting me escape upstairs.

I enter my room and close my door. I walk up to my wardrobe that has a mirror on it and in front lay some weighing scales. I removed my uniform and jogging bottoms – not that I actually go jogging they’re just comfortable. I step on the scales and look down at my stomach. I see how much I weigh and I hate it. I grabbed at my stomach and started pulling at the fat. I see myself in the mirror and I frown. I grab my t-shirt and slip it on. I put my music on and I grab my scissors. I rolled my bracelets off and sliced at my wrists. Again and again and again and again. After I was   satisfied with my work I cleaned my cuts and I put the bracelets back on. I realised a while ago that I didn’t need to hide my wrists as much because even if they did see what I did they wouldn’t give any s about it and they don’t ever see unless I leave my room to have a meal.

I opened my laptop logged onto Twitter and Tumblr, my two favourite social networking sites. Forget the rest of them these two are the best. I went onto twitter and I found out that my favourite English boy band is doing signings for their new single. Too bad I’m broke and my parents don’t give a about me. I log off of Twitter and start to scroll through Tumblr. Something then catches my eyes. EXO (My favourite Kpop band) are coming to England! They’re doing a photo shoot in England! My excitement starts to get the better of me and I start squealing like the strange fangirl I am. I start to look up more about it, things like where they’re going to be, if they’re going to do a meet up with fans and how long they’ll be in England for.

After almost an hour of searching the internet I finally come across the perfect website that tells you everything and I mean everything. It tells you where they are staying like what hotel and their schedules. It’s so weird. I only look at what part of England they’ll be in, because it said that they weren’t going to be in London, which is where everyone normally goes.

…

…………………………..

OMG! They’re coming to the city where I live. I need to calm down. They’re also doing a free meet up with fans. I’m so happy right now.

Haha stupid girl they’ll just hate you because of how ugly you are.

Stupid girl they will see you and refuse to talk to someone as worthless and fat as you.

SHUT UP! For once please shut up let me have a bit of happiness please.

But I know they never will. They will always be in my head, forever putting me down, telling me I’m fat and worthless.

Just like my parents. They use their voices. My parents it’s like they’re in my head telling me these horrible things. But they’re always true. I look in the mirror and chuck my scissors across the room. I set my alarm and lie in bed crying myself to sleep. Again.

A/N I know this is shorter than the first chapter but eh oh well. So Nina has found out that EXO are coming to her hometown to stay low key so that no Saesang fans will be at the meet up. Will she be able to go? What will EXO think of her?

Stay true :)

~TheHaniniPanini