The rest of the lunch date passed quickly with Jungsu.  We spoke about small things - things that didn't matter, unimportant conversational things.  I guess it was almost like a preparation thing.  Something to get us ready for the heavy-issued conversation laying ahead of us.  When Sungmin took me back to the house, after I retrieved the Pass from another very sour looking receptionist, I got straight to work on setting the area appropriately.  I ran to the kitchen, kicking off my shoes and jacket and leaving them draped on the floor until I could deal with them later.  I rummaged through the cupboards until I found what I needed: a cookbook.  I wanted this to be special.  I wanted everything to be so perfect.

Quickly glancing through each page, adrenaline becoming way too overwhelming to spend too much time on the contents, I merely looked at the photographs showing the ethos of each finished product.  Finally, I settled on a meal and dessert that didn't look too difficult to cook but looked extravagant to eat.  Leaving book marks on the pages I left the book on the counter-top and entered the dining room.  I carried with me a table cloth and some candles.  I wanted this meal to be perfect in creating a relaxed atmosphere so I laid the cream-coloured cloth on the table and set the candles on top - one yellow candle perched in the middle between two orange ones to match the glowing colours of the room.

I left the drapes on the windows hanging down.  For the glass doors that showed the view of the back garden however I decided to pin the drapes slightly to the side in order to allow the natural sights create a soothing visualisation.  I placed the most basic plates and cutlery on the table - avoiding the more classy and clearly pricey china as I didn't want Jungsu to feel that way.  I wanted him to feel human.  I wanted him to feel like everyone else.  In order to show his emotions, he had to accept that he had human thoughts and feelings, and that's what I wanted this room to portray.  A normality that he could not accept in himself.

When I had finished setting up the room, I moved to hastily tidy the rest of the house before cooking the food and lastly, getting myself dressed.  I settled on wearing a peach dress that was neatly-fitted from the waist upwards but below that it flowed until it ended at my knees.  My hair was left in waves around my shoulders as natural as possible and I decided to wear only the basic of makeup, covering my imperfections but not enough to show that I was trying to impress anyone.  Which, of course, I was.

"You're all dressed up?"

I almost screeched and spun around quicker than I had moved in my life to face a smirking Jungsu.  He stood in the doorway of my bedroom, both hands on the top panel and leaning in but keeping his feet on the other side of the pass-mark.  He wouldn't enter without my permission, I knew, but his mere presence made me nervous and caused my skin to reveal goosebumps provoking a mocking, "Are you cold?"

I shook my head and walked towards the door, "Dinner is downstairs, it won't get cold anytime soon if you want to change from your work clothes?"

"While you're all dressed up, why change?"  I took in his appearance.  From top to bottom.  His suit jacket was gone and his tie was semi-undone.  The first three buttons of his shirt was opened.  He looked disheveled yet every time I looked at him, he appeared more beautiful and more breath-taking.  I let my gaze lower and noted nothing different from his trousers but like myself, he was bare-foot.

Jungsu took my hand and lead me downstairs.  I felt myself rapidly losing control of the situation and upon reaching the bottom step, instructed Jungsu to sit in the dinning room before fleeing to the kitchen.  I prayed he did as I asked.  I needed water, anything really.  I needed something to cool my temperature and to cease the dryness of my throat.  After downing a quick small glass of tap water, I carried the meal out to the table on shaking legs.  I hoped Jungsu wouldn't notice my tell-tale nerves but the humour in his eyes told me otherwise.  Placing his plate down in front of him with struggling ease, I was surprised when he looked shocked.  I sat on the chair opposite him and prepared my explanation.

"I always loved sushi growing up, I thought it would be a nice meal to have?  There are many different types on our plates with different flavours and textures.  My appa always said you can tell a lot about a person from the way they eat, specifically with Sushi."

Suddenly I felt very uneasy with my choices.  I felt overprepared and silly with how I was conducting the importance of this conversation.  Was I making too big of a deal for this?  Was he freaked out by my persistence?  I didn't want to scare him off or show myself to be too overbearing.

"Your father was a wise man.  I love sushi, it's my favourite food-type."

He collected his chopsticks and fearlessly placed a piece of Sushi in his mouth.  I held my breath and waiting for his reaction, feeling smaller and smaller in his big world until he smiled and murmured "You're a good cook, Hyojin-ah."

My heart felt constricted and swollen in my chest.  I began eating from my own plate and waited in silence for him to begin his questions.

"Have you ever dated before?"

"I told you that before - I had never been out of the house before, and so had never dated or had any friends."

"But you went to a mainstream school?"

"Yes.  With much persuasion, I was allowed to attend a public school."

"Didn't you make friends there?  Boys must've loved you and girls, I'm sure they wanted to be you.  You should've been very popular."

"Aniyo.  Both boys and girls who attended the school didn't like me very much."  I refused to say that I was bullied, but I knew that wording would've been a much more accurate summary of my time at public schooling.

"Weren't you close with any of your classmates?"

"My classmates didn't like me very much.  They thought I was snobby and rich and chose to take my presence as a threat rather than a blessing, as you're implying."

"So you've never been kissed?"

I almost choked.  Holding my hand over my mouth and staring at Jungsu with gawking eyes, I shook my head fervently.  He laughed.

"I find that hard to imagine, Hyojin-ah."

Desperate to change the subject, I burst out with, "Who were the boys in the street?"

Jungsu's eyebrows knotted together, creating creases on his perfect skin and making me wish I had waited to ask my own questions.

"They were old acquaintances of mine."

"They called you by the name of 'Leeteuk'?"

"An old nickname.  Nothing of importance now."

"They seemed very scary."

"Life can be scary at times, some people don't handle it as well as others."

Jungsu's face looked ghostly.  His features were impassive and his eyes were bottomless, almost the way his face was that night with Miyoung, which lead me to my next question: "What is your status with Miyoung?"

"There is no status."

"Well how did she come to be so close with you if there is nothing behind the connection?"

"We were old acquaintances."

"Like the men in the street?"

"Exactly."

"I think you're hiding from me."

"I think you're being intrusive."

I stared at my fingers fidgeting in my lap.  None of us had even begun eating any more after our first bites.  My appetite completely vanished and all sense of confidence obliterated.  "I hate this distance.  I want to be like Miyoung.  I wish you saw me like you see Miyoung"

--

[A/N:  Annyeong-haseyo~ ₊·*◟(˶╹̆ꇴ╹̆˵)◜‧*･

Wahh, surprise update!? ₊*ˈ˚·(๑˃̶̡̢̥ ॣಐ ॣ˂̶̡̢̥๑)·˚ˈ*₊

I hope you all had a beautiful Monday.  Many people strongly dislike Monday's as it seems difficult to go back to school/work after an enjoyable weekend.  However I love Mondays so much.  I don't know why, I just always have.  It lets me see my college friends that I can't see during weekends and discuss our weekends together.  Mondays are very much happy to me and so, I hope you all have many smiles to share on this Monday. ☸ヾ(｡╹ω╹｡)ノ☸

Did you all know that on Thursday it will only be one week until Christmas? ✧⁺⸜(●′▾‵●)⸝⁺✧

I look forward to updating again, please stay healthy and happy.  Until next time! ٩(*ゝڡ◕๑)۶♥

Blessed love and light,

-Kang Hyekyo~ ٩(◕ั ˑ ◕ั๑) ]