25.12.13

"Eonni!" I finally managed to say. 
     "Fany!" Taecyeon said with surprise in his voice. He was the first one to regain his composure and hug her. She hugged him back and they grinned at each other. Then it was Chansung oppa's turn. 
      "Surprise," Nichkhun Oppa whispered as he hugged me. "Merry Christmas little Ana! Did you buy me a gift?" He asked as he pulled back. I burst out laughing. I then hugged him again since I didn't hug him back before. He hugged me back tightly and then he ruffled my hair when we pulled back.
      "Oppa!" I cried and tried to re-arrange my hair.
      "Poor Ana!" I grinned at Fany Eonni and we hugged each other.  Greetings were exchanged and we took our seats. Chansung Oppa took his silverware and chair and placed them at the top of the table. I smiled while the other two pretended to be mad.
      "Yah! Hwang Chansung! We are the hyungs here and you the maknae! How dare you!" Nichkhun Oppa said.
      "You'll be punished!"
      "No more bananas!"
      "And I'm so not helping you with your chores! And dancing too!"
      "I'm not helping you when Wooyoung will tease you anymore!"
      "Hyung!" Chansung finally said. "You both have your girlfriends and not me. Let me be the King at least, huh?" I felt my face becoming red. My face shoot up and I looked at Fany Eonni. We stared at each other, blushing furiously.
      "Yah!" Taecyeon said. "It's not like that!" We were two pairs of tomatoes by then and Chansung Oppa was laughing really hard.
      "Ana," Tiffany said, "you never said anything about being close to 2PM. When Nichkhun Oppa asked me if I knew you, I thought that he just wanted to report to his superior if you were better off with us, since you were there before... "
      "You asked her what?" I looked at Nichkhun Oppa, my brow furrowed. He smiled wickedly and pointed a finger at Taecyeon Oppa. "What?" 
      "Ania! Chinja ania!" Taecyeon Oppa glared at Nichkhun. "Khun did that on his own." We both narrowed our eyes at him.
      "Well, you were pretty pleased when I told you things about her," Nichkhun Oppa said. He then looked at me. "I just wanted to know how you were. I wanted to tell Taecyeon since I know he has an ego just as big as the universe!" Fany Eonni laughed.
      "Birds of the same feather fly together," she said and winked at me. Then, she and Nichkhun Oppa laughed and Chansung joined them. I just smiled and shook my head. 
      "You two look awesomely close, Eonni, Oppa..." I said and smirked at them. "Is it what I believe it is!" They both shook their heads at me. Taecyeon sighed.
      "Here's the thing, Ana." He looked at me. "These tow love each other madly. However, they are just too scared of going out with each other. They're like a couple. Only, they aren't dating." I smiled at looked at them.
      "Just date already peeps!" I cried.
      "Aw, cute! See? I'm AhNa's true mentor. She says exactly what I say!" I looked at Chansung Oppa weirdly. What the hell was he talking about? Did he smoke pot? "I  told the same thing, word for word, not long ago. In the same tone too I believe." I grinned and we high-fived. 
      "Oh, by the way Ana!" I looked at Fany Eonni. "You girls are coming tonight, right?"
      "Yup!" I grinned. "Wae? You have some special gift for us?"
      "You'll see..." She said and took a sip of wine. Since I was still underage, I was the only one not drinking wine. That . Usually, Fany Eonni allowed me to have half a glass. However, Taecyeon Oppa was much stricter about that... I looked at him laughing at something Fany Eonni had just said and smiled myself. When I thought about it, I still couldn't think of a reason why Taecyeon Oppa became interested in me. For one, I wasn't as pretty as many idols he was close with, like SNSD. He was close with Fany Eonni and Yoona Eonni. For me, these two were the prettiest members in the group. I wasn't as pretty or y as the,. Far from it. 
      There was also the problem of age. It was wrong to be with him, I knew it. He would be 24 in two days while I had just turned 18... That was a 6 year gap. I'm not sure why, but it felt kind of wrong to be involved with my sunbae, who was also 6 years older than me. Since I had just become legal, it was okay. But before that... When it had just started... I was like 15 or 16, I'm not really sure. He was around 22 maybe back then. It was illegal then.
      "Ana?" I blinked and looked at Taecyeon. He was touching my arm. "You spazzing out on us!"
      "Is something wrong?" Fany Eonni asked me. "Did you eat well yesterday?"
      "Ne!"
      "Did you make what I asked you to make?"
      "I did! Our fridge is filled with it!"
      "What are you two talking about?" Chansung Oppa asked.
      "Well, they trained a lot yesterday so they could eat a lot today and enjoy. QPD is debuting soon and they think they will make a mistake if they do not practice a lot..." Fany Eonni rolled her eyes. "SNSD will kidnap them soon and prevent them from singing or dancing for an entire day soon, I swear!"
      "You sure work hard, AhNa-ah," Chansung Oppa said. I just shrugged. 
      "You reap what you sow dude!" I winked. He was the one who said that to me once when I commented on how hard training was. He never pitied me or anything. He treated me like I was him little brother actually. And it helped to motivate me a lot.
      "That's my girl!" He said as he chuckled.
      "Excuse me?" Taecyeon Oppa glared at him. "This maknae is really the worst... Don't be like that to your eonnies, Ana. It's rude!"
      "But Oppa, I am Channie oppa's girl!" I batted my eyes innocently and saw anger crept on his face. Was he jealous! He said that he would never get back with me again. And we were being friends now... Why was he jealous? Didn't I hurt him enough as it is? Did he want to get burned again or what?
      "Ask you Channie Oppa to teach you how to dance, act and rap from now on!" We all laughed at that. That was so bratty of him! It did not suit his looks at all. Fany Eonni looked at me with a smile.
      "I haven't seen you like that at all... Never. This expression suits you, little Ana." I blushed and averted my gaze. She gently kicked my leg so that I would look at her. "Smile more for Eonni room now on, ne? That's all I want for Christmas."
      "Ne!" I replied and grinned. Soon, the food arrived and we all started to eat. I was ravenous. It felt like I hadn't eaten for a while! Maybe that was from all that practice, I'm not sure. Still, it was like there was a monster in my stomach...
       "Ana," Taecyeon said softly while we were eating. The others were engrossed in about some secret idol couples. Tiffany and Nichkhun were surely the best placed to talk about that! "I've been meaning to have a talk..." Uh oh. 'Have a talk ' was never a good omen.
       "About what?" I asked and took another bite of pasta. He tugged my hand until I finally looked at him. I put on a nonchalant face, but inside I was in panic. My brain had sent the red alert to every part of my body. I hoped that it wouldn't be about what I think it would be about... "Speak, will you?"
       "Not here."
       "Where then? When?"
       "Will you go somewhere with me after lunch?" I wanted to say no. Every part of myself was telling me to refuse. Nothing good will result in meeting him alone, I knew it. I was going to be an idol really soon. I couldn't risk being found out... Not now, after all that hard work.
       "Yes." Damn me! Damn him!
       "Good," he said with a warm smile. I returned his smile and then looked away quickly. My eyes then met Tiffany's. She raised one eyebrow at me. I shook my head and got back to eating. After some minutes, Tiffany rose.
       "I'm going to the bathroom. Ana, come with Eonni?" I sighed and nodded. So, we were going to talk in the bathroom. Great! I followed her quietly. Once in the toilets, she checked every stall and then locked the door. "What's up with you and Taecyeon?"
       "Pretty direct-"
       "Do like me, get to the point!"
       "I don't know Eonni," I whispered and sank on the floor. I rested my arms on my knees and sighed. I could feel the tears coming back to my eyes.
       "AhNa-ah, tell Eonni what happened, hm?" She placed her arms on my shoulders and made me stand up. "What happened in JYPE that you look like this now? You look fine getting along with them..."
       "It's because of Im Jaebum and Ok Taecyeon. They're the reason I'm like that... They... They ruined my heart?"
       "Why does the last sentence sound like a question?" She crossed her arms. I sighed and shook my head.
       "Not yet..." I went to the sink and looked at my face. I looked beautiful. Like an idol should look like. Only, there was a haunted look in my eyes. A feeling which shouldn't be there. I heard Tiffany sigh before hugging me. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. It was like I was taking in her energy from her...
       "One day, you will have to tell someone, you know?" I nodded and smiled at her. 
       "I will, just not now."
       "As long as you know what your priority is Ana, I trust you will think wisely before acting."
       "Do t worry about me. Worry about not having a scandal yourself!" I replied with a wink. "What's up with Khun Oppa? I never knew... He never said anything."
        "Oh? You guys were that close?" I nodded. "Well, he kept asking me about you..." She narrowed her eyes at me. "You don't have a crush on each other I hope!"
        "Eonni! Ania! What are you talking about?!" I shook my head at her. "He's the one who helped me a lot... Along with Junho Oppa and Channie Oppa..." I smiled warmly.
        "Good for you," she winked at me and dragged me out. The guys were splitting the bill just as we arrived. "Hey! We've gotta pay too."
        "Ne... It's unfair that you guys pay it all... Especially since Fany Eonni here is super rich!" I protested. That earned me a punch from Tiffany and laughs from the others. 
        "It's fine," Taecyeon came next to me and winked. "Next time, we invite her to tag along so that she can pay for us!" We all laughed, even Tiffany. Once outside, Taecyeon and I went our separate ways in his car. We drove with only music playing on the radio. During the entire ride, none of us spoke. Taecyeon was busy driving while I was busy admiring Seoul. I watched as Taecyeon stopped the car near the Han river. Han... That was a joke. We always came here since it was my river.
        "You guys could have waited for dessert, Oppa." 
        "Yeah, right, so that you hit the gym all day tomorrow?" He laughed, but there was no trace of humor in it. "No way, Han AhNa." I bit my lip. Was he going to talk about us, about the past or about my future? I couldn't figure it out at all as I gazed at him. I looked outside again. There were actually quite some people here. Luckily, Taecyeon had tinted windows. Well, like most idols anyway.
       "It's my life. I do what I want and you don't get to say anything about it." There. I said it! I finally had the guts to tell him that. I wished I had the guts some months before though...
       "Since when do you talk to me like that?"
       "Since I was able to stand up again after you crushed me." I looked at him straight into the eyes as I said that, without blinking. His eyes grew slightly larger.
       "I crushed you? You crushed who first?"
       "You know damn well it wasn't my intention! You know the truth!"
       "What guarantee do I have that it is the truth?"
       "You still don't believe me? After all that! I even left JYPE for God's sake, Taecyeon. You wanted what? For me to renounce it all and stay by your side?"
       "Wouldn't that have been enough?"
       "NO!" I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. "If someone has to step down, it will be you, not me."
       "That night... Did it mean nothing for you? When you were scared and desperate, you hung to me and looked for comfort from me."
       "No," I lied coldly. I met his gaze and went on with my white lie. "It meant nothing like that. I was scared. Terrified! And then you came, a friend, someone I know... Not a serial killer. Of course I did that. I would have done the same if it were Khun Oppa or even Channie Oppa."
       "You would've kissed them too?" He raised an eyebrow, suggesting that he didn't believe me. 
       "Course not. I kissed you because I was not in my right mind. I was hungry, thirsty and dead tired. I once kissed you, so it felt familiar. That's it. Nothing else."
       "What if it were JB?"
       "Yes," I held his gaze for some time. Anger and jealousy was flaring in his pupils. There was something else, but I couldn't find out what it was. I was scared that it would make me back down. "I would've kissed JB Oppa if he was the one who came." He released a huge breath through gritted teeth. "The day was going on fine! It was super nice!" I finally broke the long silence. "I was enjoying getting back to being friends with you guys. Then you opened your big mouth, asking clarification about stupid things, like you always do, and ruined the day. You're just so smart Ok Taecyeon!" I got out of the car and ran away. I had put my disguise during the drive. I hailed a cab and was lucky to find one this fast.
      Once in the car I gave the driver my address and sat back. I closed my eyes and closed my eyes. Then, I was finally able to let the tears in my eyes flow out. It was for the best to cry in a cab. I wouldn't worry my members this way.
       

Surprise! No, it's not JB! :P

I wanted to mess with you a little!

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