epilogue

"So what do you want?"

"I already told you, baby all I want for Christmas is you."

I smiled at my phone as I listen to Jongin hum the tune of its reference song.

"Seriously, you have me almost every day, not just on Christmas day. I'm asking here about the real present, something I can cover under the Christmas wrapper or put inside a fancy box so please cut this short, anything you wish for?"

"Like I said, I wish for you only. Oh I will totally enjoy unwrapping you from every single sheet for Christmas, careful I might actually tear them in the process and I will definitely fancy watching you come out from a ribbon-box with a Santa-hat... only."

"You..." I gasped and I can actually hear Jongin's smile from the other line.

erted bastard, I'll give him his own medicine, "I'm guessing you're already hard as I am with your mind having vivid imagination of me on those situations."

He groans before answering, "Right you did."

"..."

"Kyungsoo don't do that."

"D-do what?"

"Lock yourself in the bathroom and touching yourself in hopes of getting off."

"How..."

"You don't get to do that. I'll be the one to make you come... I am to watch you have that and to hear you say my name against my lips as I satisfy you with your ache..."

Well .

"Look forward to it on Christmas eve baby." He uttered breathlessly before I hear the end of the call.

And I don't think I'm still breathing.

And apparently, when you're craving for something, waiting for it for only two days felt like forever. Especially when you have Jongin to remind you about it every single time.

For two days, that's all we get to do, exchanging thru emails and calls and texts the things we want to do to each other on Christmas night and knowing that we will for certain do all the things we mentioned that we want.

I'm not actually a fan of , Jongin confessed that he used to be neither too. But as Jongin said something about how I'm making it easy for him to push it, he is also making it easy for me to swoon over his erted talking. He is that good. He makes it sound so smooth.

", I told you to drop it off. Let's skip the restaurant thing and go to your place instead." I hear the frustration in his voice from the other line.

"And like I said, I already reserved the seats there. You aware how hard to get reservation there? I figured you're always the one taking care of those things so I secretly do something like this on my own. You didn't say that you're okay with eating at my flat."

"Stop ting, you are the only one I'm hungry to eat and you know that."

"W-whatever. 7pm Grand Food Ventures. Don't be late."

"Tsk.."

"And Jongin, believe me, I'm as hungry as you are. So please don't be late."

"You are a sadist." Junmyeon declared while we were having our lunch.

"Sorry but we're not doing S&M actually." I .

He almost choked and I'm sure some patrons around who heard us looked over our table.

I can't help it. I missed this guy. I called him soon as I'm back here in Korea and he met me right away and so once in a while, like today, we go out for lunch.

His phone chimed and he answered. I go back to my food while he is on his phone and when the call ended, I might be looking at him curiously that he started talking about it.

"Well it's uh, it's the Cartier guy. The item has been shipped already from Italy... so he said it's ready for pick up."

Oh... such Christmas present... "From Italy? Really?"

He laughs, "Really. Suljoo said its limited edition and yeah, it's only available in Italy."

I looked at him incredulously; this Suljoo guy is probably his current lover but seriously? What kind of lover asks for something too much like that? Right, Kim Junmyeon's kind-of-lovers. I don't even want to know how much it costs.

He sighs, "Please don't do that."

"Do what?"

What is it about these cousins telling me what not to do?

"The thinking that you were doing right now. I told you, I love spoiling my lover, I, I feel contented giving him all he wants until he's satisfied. And that's why I'm glad when my lovers usually ask for something I can buy."

I studied him for a while searching for something in his expression but I don't know what exactly and I don't know if I see it... then again it's my turn to sigh. This friend of mine gives a lot of love in a different manner and I kind of feel that at the same time, he doesn't know a thing about the kind of true at all. Wanting to give him warmth for this cold winter season, I give him a smile, hoping to ease him a little. Reminding him that I'm just here for him and that he has me always as a friend no matter what happens. I hope he can receive a wonderful gift this Holidays.

And what do you know, Jongin is indeed telling the truth. Because soon as I saw him enter the restaurant, the moment our eyes met, I see the sudden flash of hunger in his eyes, the fire in them and I am probably having the same in mine because I watch him swallow a breath as if he knows what exactly I am seeing and he sees the same thing in my mind.

He took the seat across me and purposely forwarding closely so our knees brush against each other.

Suddenly remembering Junmyeon's previous comment, I must say that instead of being a sadist, I am probably a masochist. Because I know how painfully aching to be with this man and yet not being able to touch him but I still insisted this.

We are staring at each other without saying anything when the waiter came to our table and gave us the wine menu.

After stating our orders, the waiter went away and we were back with the staring.

Fine, you don't want to talk? Then I'm on.

Finding enough time to actually check him, I noticed that he is not wearing a tie in his white dress suit; he's wearing a vest though that's slightly lighter than his charcoal blazer and pants, and he is y alright.

I stopped looking at him dumbly when I felt the corner of his lips turning up.

And I know that smile of his.

"You realize now that this is impossible right Kyungsoo?"

I opened my mouth to speak but when nothing comes out he continues, "I told you I am hungry---" he shook his head as if he said something wrong before he clarifies, "I am starving. And Kyungsoo, you look deliciously edible right now."

Oh , he's really saying these.

I'm starting to have a cold sweat as everything seem to raise the temperature by a higher degree.

My heart started to pound heavily inside my chest and we didn't even noticed that the wine is finally being served until Jongin raises his glass and places it beside his lips.

"We can't do this here Kyungsoo-ah..."

He made it sound like the verb 'do' has thousands of meaning.

It's true. When Jongin and I are involved, we just need to meet each other, when we meet, we need to see each other, we need to hear each others' voices, and then we need to reach out, to touch each other. We need to connect.

That is how it works with us.

That's how we get our fill.

"We can't keep torturing ourselves like this Kyungsoo-ah... unless you love to have audience... I am fine with that."

"I..."

"Yes?"

"Jongin-ah, can we... is it okay if we go home now?"

He smiled widely. "Absolutely."

All along the drive we were barely keeping our hands with each other. We were teasing ourselves by edging touches whenever possible. The air in the car is thick with lust and desire and yearning. When we pulled in front the building of my apartment, he gave a chaste kiss before getting off the car and opening the door to my side.

And we were chuckling like idiots when we were inside the elevator because despite being crammed with other people inside the small space, our skin are brushing against each other and our thoughts are definitely running wild and so the second we turn at each other, we lost it. We don’t care that other people turn to our sides looking as if we are losing are minds because we’re getting there in reality. We laughed because seriously, it's funny.

We were hurrying to my flat; I unlocked my door without a beat. The air was palpable when we stepped inside my place and the moment I hear the door shut behind me, I was already pulled by my arm and pressed against the door in between Jongin all over me.

Kissing, feeling, growling, clasping,

"Bed..." I uttered breathlessly.

"Can't, I need you now." Jongin demanded-- his voice rasp, his eyes raw, and his caress a sweet rough.

And I need him the same right now so we did something about that need.

I laugh from my stomach as I pulled the sheets closer to my shoulders. Jongin looked at my incredulously from my side. He is sitting with his back flat against the headboard of my bed and I am lying flatly on my stomach.

"What's funny?" He asks smiling and a little amused.

"Nothing... um, just that, thinking about it now, it's as though every area of my place is a checkpoint. Like when we did it just in front of my door, God I swear people passing by knew we were... argh, and then on the couch, on the dining table, at the shower, here... like seriously, I can no longer roam around here without thinking of those things we've done."

"We were talking about filling up our starvation for years here, Kyungsoo, it's normal."

I sigh in response.

"Speaking of," he said as he reach for his clutch bag and take out a small velvet box, "for you."

He hands me the box and he noticed my nervousness and hesitation at taking it.

"Relax, it's not a ring, promise." He assured.

I nodded while giving back a smile. I opened the box and gasped at the sight of the most beautiful designer modern cable cuff bracelet in white gold.

"Holy ."

He chuckled and seems to be a bit embarrassed at my thoughtless mutter.

"Like it?"

I looked at him wide-eyed. "What? I... I can't accept this."

Closing back the box, I return it to him.

Frowning he said, "You don't like it?"

"It's not like I don't like it. It's too much, too heavy, I mean, you can't buy me gifts so expensive like that, I don't know what to do!"

"Just accept it."

Oh rich bastards.

"Jongin, c’mon, you don't need to buy me material stuffs to express something. Like you told me before, I'm very contented just to have you. Like this. Us."

"Yeah..."

"I'm already thoroughly spoiled by you like this, I can't be anymore spoiled than I am now." I said finally lighting up the mood.

"I understand. I'll consider it next time. But you need to accept this one now."

"I thought---"

He cut me with a kiss.

"Please? Just this time." He says while already slipping the pretty thing around my wrist.

"Thanks." I said shyly while looking at it now on my wrist.

"You like it?" He asked again and he’s blushing. Seriously, I should be the one blushing right now.

"Yeah."

“Good.”

“But this will be the only one okay? No more expensive stuffs like this as gifts.”

“Geezer.”

I snort in response and he laughs.

"I already thought of my gift."

"Do tell."

"You."

"You already said that."

"Yes but not precisely how, so I'm asking you to live with me."

My heart stopped a beat.

"What?"

"Live in with me Kyungsoo. I want you like this with me in my place every day, every night, every time."

"Oh."

"Oh? So?"

"Uh... um, is it okay if we think about it for a while... it's a bit sudden and uh, serious..."

"I know it's kind of intense."

"Um..."

"Well, I could persuade you about it though while we're at the deciding phase."

"Persuade?"

"Yeah, I can be very persuading you know." He said sliding next to me now.

"Really?"

"Yeah, how about we start with the benefits... benefits of living together with me, I'll give you a taste." he adds as he pulls me by my hips closer to him and starts.

"Merry Christmas, baby."

And yeah he did work hard in persuading me.

I almost think it's a good idea to live in with him.

Almost.

:)

 ----xoxo----

and i know it's almost 4 days late but happy new year everyone!

thank you for being a part of 2014.... let's know each other more this 2015 :) have a great year ahead !

More love to give to you guys, more fun to share, more dreams to make, more memories to create, more lessons to learn, and more friends to meet and more thoughts to connect :)