Jaejoong

During the following time, I had a lot of dates with Ally and I tried to be as busy as possible to not have to be going out with Yunho. I had blocked out the memory of my racing heart on that morning when I had slept in his bed, as far as possible, but I couldn’t help thinking about it, about him from time to time. I knew I wouldn’t be able to avoid him forever.

Yunho

Weeks passed and to me it felt like Jaejoong and Ally already had had hundreds of dates, but they didn’t seem to have considered a relationship, yet, because every time I asked whether they’re a couple now or nor, Jaejoong always said that he’s not sure and that they hadn’t talked about that, yet. When he was talking about her, he was always complimenting her and so on, but I don’t know what it was, but to me, he just didn’t sound like he’s in love with her. I was hoping for him to find love in her. I gave him a job, a home and a life, but I wasn’t able to give him a love. I just hoped that that girl would make him happy. I hoped she’d deserve him.

Jaejoong

I knew that Ally wanted to take the next step. I knew she wanted a relationship, but I always tried to avoid that topic, but on that day, she directly asked me about it, so I couldn’t escape anymore. I wanted it. I wanted it so badly. I wanted to fall in love with her so badly. I thought I could. I thought it would work. But now, all the doubts were coming back. I was sorry. I really was. But she wasn’t the one I wanted to be with, and I hated myself for that. Again and again, I had told myself that I was only feeling these feelings because I felt guilty because he had saved me. I still didn’t know an answer. But I had to give one. Ally couldn’t wait anymore…

Yunho

It was Saturday evening and I was alone, because Jaejoong was having a date with Ally and I wasn’t in the mood for going out or inviting friends over. My mood slightly brightened when I heard Jaejoong coming home, but I was surprised. I hadn’t expected him to come home that ‘early’. I got up from the couch and left the living room.

“Jaejoong! Why are you-“ I started, but when I saw him, I stopped. There were tears running down his face, but his face was still as beautiful as before. He seemed startled and wanted to escape into the bathroom, but I stopped him. I grabbed his arm and forced him to face me.

“Hey~Jaejoong…what happened?”

He didn’t answer he just let out a sob. I lead him to the couch and we sat down.

“Come on, calm down and talk to me~” I said and softly his hair and pulled away the wisps of hair that were falling onto his face.

“Ally…asked me to be her boyfriend.”

“Okay…and what’s the problem about that?”

“The problem is… that I like someone else.” He said. I was surprised and confused, because I knew no one else of his friends he ever talked about more intensive than about Ally.

“Who?” I asked. He took my hands away from his head and looked at the floor.

“You.” He finally said. He said it silently but to me it felt like the word was echoing through the whole room. I looked at him shocked, unable to move. My mind was blank.

Jaejoong

For a while it was just silent and I felt more and more embarrassed. I wanted him to break the silence, but when he finally did it, I wished he had never done it.

“I’m sorry, but…I don’t feel the same.” He said and my world seemed to have frozen and stopped from turning. I hoped it would never turn again…

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I know you'll probably be going crazy after you read this, I'm sorry! xD The fic turned out totally different from what I planned, but don't give up on Yunjae, yet....please