Ryeowook’s POV

It’s nice now that Donghae and Eunhyuk are back. I worried about them a lot during the past month while they were on tour and now that they‘re safe home, I was relieved. I didn’t know why but I worried a lot nowadays. Mostly, I’d tell myself it was because of my motherly personality but I know that I was just lying. Deep down, I know the truth. Deep down, I was just selfish.

I was worried about myself more than them.

I wanted, no, I needed, to see them before anything were to happen to me. While Eunhyuk and Donghae were touring at Japan, I was worried. I wanted them to quickly come home and sometimes, I admitted, I even hoped that their concerts would get cancelled for some reason. I just had to see them before anything happened to me. I wanted to know they were fine with my own eyes before I… Before I get bedridden for the rest of my life…Before I…. Before I die. Why did you think I went to their concert? I didn’t even knew that I could make it that far on my own, but I did and just seeing them, so happy and energetic during their concert…. They gave me courage and strength in a way. But was it wrong that I was being so selfish? I just wanted to get to see and be around my members before anything else happened to me.

The doctors said that I still had a chance, that I was in the second stage and some patients, some, indeed were able to fight off this… this disease a little bit longer. But what were the chances? What were the odds? I believed those people who fought the diseases off were meant to stay on earth because they must have been very good people, people who donated all the time, people who smiled and never cursed and loved every single being on earth. Who was I, Kim Ryeowook, to this earth?

“Hey, you okay?”

A voice startled me and without even looking, I nodded. A habit of mine. My hyung sat next to me and carefully observed me before he sat back against the couch, grabbing the remote playfully from my hand to switch channels. Usually, I’d fight back but nahh, not today… My body felt too heavy. Eunhyuk found this weird and eyed me suspiciously.

“You’re not going to scream at me?” Eunhyuk asked in disbelief.

“I’m being nice since you just came back from tour and all that.” I answered, lightening up the mood.

“So you did miss us, didn’t you?” Eunhyuk grinned his gummy grin. “Just admit it.”

“I don’t.”

“Come on.” Euhyuk urged.

I laughed, sticking my tongue out. Eunhyuk pouted and switched a few more channels before he finally gave up, screaming for Donghae’s name.

“Yah! Where are you!? We’re going to be late now!” Eunhyuk screamed. “I swear all you members livi