[CONTENTID1]Chapter 30[/CONTENTID1]

[CONTENTID2] Soundtrack: "Problem" - Max Schneider (Cover)

[/CONTENTID2] [CONTENTID3]

"And the best thing now

Is probably for you to exit"

"What?" Nam Soon whispered, not believing the words he just heard. What was Heung Soo even thinking? Something like this, it was more than obvious that it wouldn't work out.

"Come live with me," Heung Soo asked again without a single blink. He wanted to hold Nam Soon's hand now, but he knew that it would be better if he didn't.

"Heung Soo..." Nam Soon sighed, biting his lips nervously. Heung Soo couldn't be thinking straight. After everything, how could he even think that this could be a good idea? How could he even consider it?

"I'm not joking... I really meant it. Despite everything... You are still my friend. Even if you don't believe it right now, I worry about you. I want to be the one that will be there for you when you need it," He reached out to Nam Soon’s hands again, but gave up and closed his fists, looking down briefly before looking back into his eyes again. "Let's forget everything... And live together. At least you won't need to worry about your rent anymore."

Nam Soon was staring into the other’s eyes, and he wanted to say yes with all his might. To live with Heung Soo... It would probably be a dream come true but his reasoning wouldn't let him. Would they manage to live together without ruining everything for good? Nam Soon had serious doubts about it. Now was the worst time possible for it. But, even so... Even so... He really wanted to accept Heung Soo's proposal.

"Heung Soo... I don't think it's a good idea. I mean..." He bit his lips, but Heung Soo still looked determined - more determined than ever.

"Please Nam Soon. Let me help you," He pleaded, and this time he couldn't restrain himself anymore. He held Nam Soon's hand comfortingly. He couldn't accept a no for an answer. This was the only thing he could do for him, so he really needed Nam Soon to accept it. He wanted him to accept it. "It doesn't need to be a permanent thing. Just until you become more stable. What about it?" He insisted, and Nam Soon couldn’t say no anymore. How could he? He couldn't even think rationally when it was about Heung Soo.

"Okay. But just until then," his words left like a whisper... but a whisper that came with a little bit of hope. Hope that everything would get better.... hope that all their worries would just disappear with time.

"Even though I can't forgive you

I really want to

I want you"

Nam Soon would be moving to Heung Soo's apartment at the end of the month - ten days ahead. It was enough time to pack all his stuff and leave his apartment clean.

He was anxious, and couldn't stop thinking about it. He knew he shouldn't be feeling this way - that he shouldn't be feeling these butterflies in his stomach. After everything, he knew that keeping his heart distant of these emotions would be for the best... But it was too hard. He was moving in with Heung Soo. They would be living together... How could he not feel anxious about it?

And that was why, when Heung Soo invited him to go to the movies that weekend, he tried to fool himself by pretending that he was going only because he had been excited to watch the movie - but he knew that this wasn't really the truth.

He knew because of the half an hour that he spent choosing his clothes, because of the minutes he spent trying to straighten his messy hair and look good - he knew it because his heart kept anxiously waiting to meet him, and the butterflies in his stomach wouldn't calm down even a bit.

And he couldn't stop cursing himself for it - for those feelings that he should have forgotten but didn't. Because even after everything, he couldn't wait to meet Heung Soo again.

Because, just like a fool, he still couldn’t get over his love for him.

"I know I shouldn't ever call back

Or let you come back

But it's you"

Nam Soon was beautiful as ever when he approached him in front of the box office, and his smile was enough to brighten his day as long as he was able to see it. This last week had been one of the happiest since days. Although he knew he shouldn't have this thoughts, even though he wasn't really thinking deeply about the reason why he was feeling like this... He just did.

During these last few days, he wasn't afraid of losing Nam Soon anymore. He hadn't seen him since they talked the other day, but everytime he would think about Nam Soon, he would feel warm, happy and excited to finally live with him. If they were living together there was nothing that would be able to break them apart - not even those unwanted feelings. He would have Nam Soon by his side almost all the time, and that was more than enough to feel relieved. He didn't know how long this happiness would last, but he would enjoy it to the fullest.

"I bought the tickets already," Heung Soo showed him both of them in his hands, and Nam Soon prompted to take his wallet from the pocket of his jeans.

"I'll buy popcorn then," he said as they walked together to the store. "Want some coke, or soda?"

"Coke..." Heung Soo answered, unable to hide the slight smile that appeared on his lips. It was just impossible not to when Nam Soon was showing him those bright eyes, and he felt that baby shampoo scent that was so refreshing at his side.

"I bought tickets for Avengers, can I get a poster along with the popcorn?" Nam Soon asked the man behind the counter, staring at the promo right in front of it.

"Yes," he answered, giving Nam Soon the large popcorn and a poster of the movie.

"You're not really getting a poster are you?" Heung Soo huffed startled, but Nam Soon briefly shrugged his shoulders.

"Why?" He mumbled, already with it in his hands. "Of course I will," he confirmed just like a little ten year old child that just got a new present.

"Oh my God," Heung Soo shuddered, "I'll pretend I don't know you," he complained, starting to walk ahead of him.

"Don't you start complaining about it because I'll hang it at your bedroom wall when I move there," Nam Soon smirked, and Heung Soo rolled his eyes, but still without being able to hide the smile on his face.

"I think I'm starting to regret it..." He growled, but had to laugh as Nam Soon quickly gave him the tongue.

He could hang that poster. Truthfully, he could hang thousands of posters if that meant having Nam Soon by his side like this.

"Head in the clouds

Got no weight on my shoulders"

It was finally the day Nam Soon would be moving to Heung Soo's apartment. He rented a van to take his things and it took almost all Saturday to finish organizing everything. Clothes, electronics, photographs... It felt like he was moving in forever, but he knew he shouldn't be thinking like that.

It was just for some time. Just until he got a more stable job... Just until then.

They organized some of the old pictures together and Heung Soo was finishing putting the frames around the living room. It was nostalgic and warm to see them... And to put them over his apartment now that Go Nam Soon was there with him... He couldn't wish for nothing else. Or could he?

"Looking at it like this..." Heung Soo said as he positioned an old picture of them on a ramen shop at the central table, "...All this pictures..." He smiled and Nam Soon stared at him in silence as he opened the last box with his video game in it. "It look like we..."

"It looks like two friends moving in together," Nam Soon interrupted him before he could even finish saying what he was about to say. He didn't want to hear it, because he didn't want to think about it. They didn't look like a couple. That's what it was - just friends and nothing more. "Temporary, just like it is." Nam Soon finished as he took the game out of the box and stood up to gather it along the other empty boxes.

Heung Soo bit his lips, cursing himself for even trying to say it. What the hell was he thinking? How could he even think about something like that? Joking like it hadn't any other meaning. Just as insensitive as that... How could he?

"I let you go

Let you back

I finally learned my lesson!"

They had a quick dinner after finishing organizing everything that night. It was more work than they thought, so as soon as everything was ready all they thought about doing was going to bed to rest for the night.

Heung Soo honestly didn't really think about it before, but now that Nam Soon was there, it was the first time he realized that the other never intended to sleep at his room. He had only one room, and since they always slept together he hadn't thought that this would be an issue. Yet, now that he was rethinking it, of course it was.

Even though they were pretending it never happened, how could they go as far as sharing a bed... After all that? But even so... Heung Soo was stupid enough to think they would.

However, Nam Soon prompted to lay over the couch before Heung Soo could even bring up this subject. And the older guy couldn't hold his disappointment. He understood, but that was exactly the reason why he felt disappointed like this.

"Why don't you sleep in my bedroom? The bed is large enough..." Heung Soo would complete it with for the both of us, but stopped there. At this point Nam Soon had already lay and covered himself with his blanket.

"It's fine here," Nam Soon simple rumbled, without staring at Heung Soo.

"I'll be a bit noisy in the morning... Are you fine with it?" Heung Soo whispered but Nam Soon only shook his head under the blanket. Heung Soo bit his lips and didn't talk anymore. He shouldn't have even asked him.

Because Nam Soon couldn't even consider it as a possibility. How could he sleep at Heung Soo's side like that? He couldn't. After everything, with all the memories of him, feeling his scent at his side... He wouldn't be able to keep still.

So, right now, the sofa was pretty comfortable and the only reasonable option for him.

"Tell me, tell me baby

Why can't you leave me?"

Heung Soo lay alone at his large bed and stared at the ceiling. Regretting the conversation he just had, regretting everything he said. He wanted to scream at himself for even mentioning it, but other than that... He wanted to scream because of what he was feeling right now.

Because how bad it felt to lay on his empty bed... For how much he wished that Nam Soon would be by his side.

As much as he cursed himself for it... It was the only thing he felt. And even though he thought it would become bearable with time and that it would just fade away... It just didn't. Other than that, it would only grow bigger. Every second that passed, he felt more and more desperate about Nam Soon.

And for that, he wanted to scream to himself.

"Cause even though I shouldn't want it

I gotta have it

I want you"

Nam Soon didn't know what time it was when he woke up with the sound of Heung Soo opening the fridge to take something out of it. It was barely dawned and he was already awake at a Sunday morning - like he had made it on purpose.

Nam Soon covered his head with the blanket and growled some curses. Heung Soo looked at him briefly before smiling.

"I'm going to the gym, wanna go? It's here in the building," he invited him but Nam Soon only rumbled some incomprehensive words under it. Heung Soo laughed at him, and didn't ask again. He knew he would never go. Honestly, he might have went a little earlier than usual to annoy him. Was he a child for doing it? Truth was that he was still mad for Nam Soon not having slept with him in his bedroom.

"I told you I would be noisy. You should move to the bedroom."

Heung Soo was indeed just like a child sometimes.

"I know you're never gonna wake up

I gotta give up

But it's you"

Heung Soo could feel the scent of cooked rice when he went back to the apartment after gym. Nam Soon probably ended up waking up, since he was sitting at the sofa too entertained playing his video game.

"You ate already?" Heung Soo asked, serving himself with some rice as Nam Soon nearly answered him with a low yes.

He sat at the younger boy’s side holding his bowl of rice, and Nam Soon briefly looked at Heung Soo, seeming a little annoyed.

"You know you're smelling, right?" Nam Soon complained looking back at the game. Heung Soo, that was still sweaty from training, didn't seem to care though.

"So what?" He shrugged, "Oh, you'll have to sleep over the smelly couch, that's the problem?" Heung Soo mocked as he lay over Nam Soon's pillow.

"Yah!!" Nam Soon shouted, giving up his attention from the game and taking the pillow away from Heung Soo, "Wanna die?" Nam Soon exclaimed, hitting the others head with the pillow before hiding it behind his back.

"No, but you do, bastard, I almost spilled the rice all over it!" Heung Soo laughed, standing up with the bowl in his hands.

"Serves you well," Nam Soon mumbled, standing up to get another bowl of rice since seeing Heung Soo eating it opened up his appetite.

"It’s not me that's going to sleep over a bunch of rice," Heung Soo shrugged his shoulder as Nam Soon just smiled at his side, biting his lip.

It was nice. Being like this with Heung Soo... Just like before, like nothing had ever happened.... He liked it. If they just could be like this forever and forget about everything else... Forget about those feelings... Yet, Nam Soon already knew he couldn't. It was not possible, at least not for him. For him... It probably would never be.

"I should be wiser

And realize that I've got

One less problem without you"

It should be past eleven at night when the movie Heung Soo suggested for them to watch finally ended. They ended up watching it at the bedroom because it was more comfortable - since Nam Soon's television was placed at Heung Soo's bedroom - but Heung Soo didn't know that the movie would be that long. He had to work tomorrow and it was already this late.

Nam Soon had been too silent since some time, and Heung Soo thought he was too concentrated on the movie to talk. However, when he looked at his side, the younger boy was lying over the bed with his eyes closed.

"Are you sleeping?" Heung Soo mumbled, but Nam Soon remained without moving. Heung Soo smiled lightly, staring at the man at his side, sleeping so comfortable.

So beautiful and calm like he had no worries whatsoever. Heung Soo stared at his pouty lips just slightly opened as he breathed slowly... And suddenly, for a brief second, all he wanted to do was take those lips. Half a second before he realized that his hands were just a few inches away from touching his face.

He pulled away abruptly, and closed his eyes, cursing his thoughtless actions as he bit his lips. Slowly, he turned around to face the boy again, and delicately covered him up with the brown blanket that was only covering their feet before.

He wished to stay like that, admiring his beautiful face all night... Yet, if he did it, he knew those feelings might came back. That's why he just turned around in bed, turning off the television and giving his back to the other.

"Either you want it or you just playin'

I'm listening to you knowin'

I can't believe what you're sayin'"

Nam Soon opened his eyes as soon as Heung Soo turned around over the bed. He should have opened his eyes earlier? He didn't have the courage. Because when he felt Heung Soo's eyes over him, he couldn't breath.

However, if he had opened his eyes sooner... What could have happened, then? As he stared at Heung Soo's back, he couldn't help but regret it. But at the same time, he knew he didn't have the courage, and he knew he shouldn't.

He shouldn't be even here, over this bed with him. If he would be true to himself he knew that he shouldn't have never even moved here.

However, as he lay over there and felt Heung Soo’s scent at his side... He couldn't help but wonder... What would happen to them? In the future, what was their fate, then? Would their friendship remain...? Would it overcome these unwanted feelings that they were feeling...?

Or would they...

"Everytime you touch me

And say you love me

I get a little bit breathless"

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