7.

Hyesu hopped off the bike, having the wind blow against her bare shoulders with her hair flying to the side. She looked at the pier, wondering whether to take the ferry. On second thought, maybe not, she thought.

She just wanted to have the whole day to think of her feelings. She feels scared, worried and afraid.

She sighed and shook her head as she found herself getting to nowhere in her thoughts. She went back to her bike and cycled in the pathway, between the road and the sea.

As she cycled, a cyclist cycled past her, and she tilted her head, finding him familiar. Coincidentally, they both stop the brakes and turned to face each other. Hyesu took off her helmet and smiled, waving to Suho while he waved back.

“Didn’t know you are that athletic,” Hyesu commented, smiling weakly while she faced the sea, leaning on the lamp post as she drank her water, while Suho leaned on the railings. “Well, I guess it’s a habit because ..” his voice trailed off, and Hyesu knew the reason-Hye Min.

She sighed. She should give the thought up.

She took in a deep breath. “Because of Hye Min, isn’t it?” she said, having thousands of knives stabbing her heart, and also Suho’s. Because the person he loved would be no longer here with him. Bitter.

“You should try to let go, because sometimes holding on for too long will wear and tear it,” she persuaded, frowning while Suho gulped. “You don’t understand Suho. You are holding onto a crumpled piece of paper. For five years Suho, five years. It’s too long. It will turn yellow, it will be wrinkled, and yours too. You will feel pain and numb, don’t you understand? You’re torturing yourself too.”

Suho closed his eyes and swallowed. “I know,” he said, trying not to have his voice crack. “I’m trying. But sometimes I just feel alone, like there’s nobody there for me to get out of this situation. I’m trying really hard that’s why I hardly stay at home and just do work to let go, not think about her. But you don’t understand, Hyesu,” Suho croaked. He really felt empty. Five years without Hye Min and yet he was actually standing strong, but sometimes no. He wasn’t really strong. He was about to go beserk.

At times his mind was going wild and he even asked himself, “Why am I even alive?” That question always was with him at  every second when he wasn't doing anything.

That feeling in him made him felt that nothing was worth to live again, no hope in his life after losing Hye Min.

Hye Min, was his hope.

He wanted to be with Hye Min, but he can’t just abandon every single person in his life, right? He needs to be considerate, that was why he blocked that thought from his mind. He really want to shut his mind.

Hyesu could feel his pain, somehow. Maybe because she went under a similar incident as him, even though heaven didn’t really take him away from Hyesu, but somehow her past incident was almost the same as Hye Min.

Both of their loved ones were gone, or the love was lost.

Hyesu slowly placed her hand on Suho’s, comforting him alot. She waited for his reaction, then said, “Suho.”

She took in a deep breath and sighed. “Even though I’m not Hye Min, and I don’t like acting as another person. But, you can see me as Hye Min for five minutes,” she said aloud, looking down. She hate acting as someone she didn’t even know. It was like going under someone’s identity, lying and deceiving people. She hate it. But for Suho, it will be alright for her.

Suho’s eyes rounded in surprise, and he turned to look at her. Hyesu was still looking down at her feet, shuffling while she nodded her head. “I’m serious. Just treat me as Hye Min. Say whatever you want to say to her for these past five years, just, no intimate physical contact, alright?” she said, having a deal with Suho.

He didn’t respond, and Hyesu just took it as a yes.

“Close your eyes,” she said, closing her eyes, and Suho followed.

Ten seconds passed, and Suho opened his eyes. The first thing that he thought was Hye Min, and they weren’t at the pier, they were at the playground. Where Suho taught how Hye Min to cycle, which didn’t go out as expected.

His eyes widened in surprise, and he was so emotional, that his eyes began to tear, blinding his vision and he impulsively hugged Hyesu. “Hye Min,” he whispered affectionately, closing his eyes to savour the moment.

Hyesu’s eyes open and she was startled. She blinked in surprise and found that Suho was hugging her. Even though she said to not have any intimate contact, she couldn’t help but smile.

“I miss you so much, Hye Min,” Suho said and Hyesu blinked in surprise, then sighed. *Oh right, I’m Hye Min.*

She hesitantly patted his back, and swallowed. “Yeah. I, mi-miss.. you, too.”

“You had no idea how much I suffered for five years without you, Hye Min.” He smiled, hugging her tighter. Hyesu choked as she gasped for air. “Hye Min, come back. I really miss you. Because of you, I really wanted to follow you and be with you.”

Hyesu’s eyes widened in shock. “You.. you wanted to .. die?”

He nodded, then softly smiled. “But now not anymore,” he said, breaking the hug and holding onto her shoulders firmly. His eyes softened at the look of his long lost Hye Min. “Hye Min..” he whispered, curling a strand of hair behind her eat, and her cheek, while Hyesu’s eyes widened in surprise. "I thought I would never see you again. I thought you would be only memories, but now you're here.." he whispered. Her eyes travelled down to her corner of her eye where Suho her cheek, and she wanted to protest, but she promised him.

He cupped her part of her face with his hand, and the other hand holding firmly onto her shoulder. He slowly leaned forward, closing his eyes and Hyesu knew what danger she was in now.

She immediately panicked and looked left and right, her breathing speed quickened as Suho’s face came closer. She immediately shut her eyes and used all of her might, pulling away from him. “Cut! Cut! Cut!” she shouted, shaking her head and her eyes were still shut.

Suho then realized it was Hyesu he was referring to and he blinked in surprise. He snapped out of his thoughts and totally regret his actions.

She shouted. “Cut! Enough! Oh my god I can’t take it anymore..” she muttered as her voice trailed off, and she shook her head vigourously while she open her eyes.

Even though she wanted that kiss, she didn’t want to have that kiss in another person’s identity, and she also knew if they two kissed, Suho would feel really really guilty, and maybe they wouldn’t even meet up because of the awkward situation.

“Sorry Suho, I didn’t mean to suddenly go beserk and go around shouting ‘cut’ just that-“

“I understand. I should actually thank you, or else things would get really awkward..” he said, scratching the back of his head sheepishly. After the outing at Lotte World, he was afraid things would go awkward again.

Hyesu heaved a sigh of relief and smiled. “Well that’s good," she said, smiling while she shuffled her feet awkwardly.

Gosh, the atmosphere was so tensed that she daren't say anything, neither did Suho.

They stayed in their positions, looking at the sea, biting their lips as at the corner of their eyes, they could feel their eyes meeting and they quickly looked back to the front.

It was for a great ten minutes before Hyesu take the initiative to break the ice between then. She looked at the sea and squinted her eyes. “Hey.” Suho whipped his head and raised an eyebrow. “Yeah?”

“Let's play a game," she said, her eyes travelling to their bikes and Suho slowly nodded his head.. “Su-sure, but just biking?”

She rolled her eyes and walked around him. “Well, not really. I’ll tie this silk scarf loosely on the back of my bike, then you will have to chase after my with your bike and get the scarf, understand?” she explained and tied the scarf to her bike.

Suho quirked his lips and winced. “Silk? A little too expensive..”

“I’m just joking! It’s cotton. Dare to challenge?” she asked, raising an eyebrow at him, while Suho's lips curled up and he nodded once again. “Who’s the catcher?”

“Can’t you see where the scarf is? The bike that has no scarf will be the catcher, simple as that, alright?” she said and immediately cycled, while Suho gawked at her and quickly hopped on his bike, his speed increasingly as he peddled faster, grinning while he shouted. “Cheater!”

They went around, going in circles while Hyesu desperately tried cycling away, and Suho desperately trying to balance the bike with one hand while the other trying to grab hold of the scarf.

They laughed and cycled in circles, and just like this, their awkward situation was no longer an awkward situation and the ice was easily broken.

---

When they realized that they have played till it’s evening, they stopped and went near the beach. They placed their bicycles down and walked on the sand. “I have not been here with Hye Min before,” he whispered and she smiled. “Then you really missed out a lot.”

Her gaze slowly travelled down to his ring on his fourth finger and she smiled. “The design is exquisite. Where did you buy it? And what are those small particles made of?” she asked curiously. Suho smiled and took it off. “I’ll do this because you look like Hye Min,” he said and lent it to Hyesu as she touched it, smiling.

“The particles are just designs, the diamond in the middle of the ring is made up of her ashes, it’s unique,” he said and Hyesu blinked and she tossed it, up and down as she swiftly catch it in her palm while she glanced at Suho. Suho immediately panicked as he looked up and down, his gaze fixed on the ring that was tossed up, and was quickly caught by Hyesu when she repeated it again. His heart would always skip a beat whenever the ring was up in the air and he bit his lip. "Hyesu I think that's enough.." his voice faltered while Hyesu chuckled and tossed it once more. "Alright," she said and this time, she failed to catch it.

Suho's eyes widened in shock and Hyesu sighed as she immediately reached out for it in the sand, where a boy ran past him, stepping onto the ring as he accidentally kicked sand into her eyes and she winced.

She rubbed her eyes and quickly reached out for the ring, as she dug her hand into the sand and her eyes immediately widened in shock. "It's not there," she said and Suho's eyes rounded in shock. "What?!" he shouted, having Hyesu to jump and she gulped. "I'm so sorry," her voice faltered and Suho immediately dug through the sand. “Are you crazy?! How could you drop it!” he shouted, having Hyesu to jump as she bit her lip and immediately searched for it.

When someone just shouts at her, the old her would immediately shout back. But now she is dealing with Suho who lost Hye Min. Five years past and he has yet to let go of Hye Min. If time cannot change him, how can she change him?

She definitely understands him, and plus it is her fault that she had to dug for the ring that meant the whole world to Suho.

"Maybe.. Maybe the boy that ran past me kicked it.." she whispered and bit her lip. "Maybe it's over there," she quickly said and went to the other direction, digging through the sand.

She dug through the sand as she apologized profusely, while Suho continued digging through and finally, he found it. He immediately smiled and he dusted the sand of it, bringing it close to his chest and he immediately wore it on his finger.

Then, he turned to look at Hyesu who was still looking for it, sand that was stuck in her hair but she still continued looking for it.

He was mad at her. Mad at her for playing with his ring, but once he found it, he actually felt quite guilty for shouting at her. It was then when he decided to play a trick on her.

“Forget it, Hyesu. What’s gone is gone. Don’t look for it anymore,” he said while she shook her head profusely. “I can’t. It’s Hye Min. I need to find it for you,” she murmured and continued digging.

“At this rate you’ll dig a well,” he said and she shook her head. “As long as I can find the ring, it doesn’t matter.”

Suho sighed and rode on his bicycle, leaving Hyesu alone while he cycled along the park, smiling and cracking a smile. *Bet Hyesu would scream at me when she knows I was playing a trick on her..*

Slowly, night fell and he returned back to the beach. Seeing no signs of Hyesu around any longer, he smiled. “I think she knew I played a trick on her,” he whispered and chuckled, then continued cycling when all of a sudden he stopped in his tracks. He saw Hyesu’s bicycle still left there and he frowned.

He quickly hopped off and ran towards the beach, seeing Hyesu who was still digging through the sand, with sand stuck on her arms and hair but she still refused to give up and continued digging.

Suho quickly went up to her and tapped her shoulder. “Hyesu,” he said. She looked up at him in guilt and choked back a tear. “I’m sorry, I’m really sorry. I didn’t mean to lose the ring. I know it means a lot to you. Just give me some more time, I’ll definitely find it for you,” she said while Suho reached his hand out, showing off the ring on his finger. “I found it, I was just playing a trick on you for losing my ring,” he said and when Hyesu looked at the ring on his finger, she sighed, then immediately broke down in tears.

Suho blinked in surprise. “Hyesu, don’t cry. Are you angry at me for playing a trick on you? I’m sorry,” he quickly said, panicking while Hyesu shook her head and smiled weakly. “I’m ha-happy, I thought you lost the ring for good, I thought you would never find Hye Min’s ashes again,” she croaked and as she quickly wiped the tears and she bit back a smile, while she then immediately fell onto Suho's lap, fast asleep.

Suho immediately held her, and slowly rest her on his lap and he sighed, then slowly leaned forward and closed his eyes as he kissed her forehead.

“Thank you, Hyesu.”

-----