CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
Realigning The Lost Stars.The Butterfly Effect.
NOV 2012.
YOONA'S POV.
Dinner was nothing more than the clinking sound of metal hitting porcelain and pregnant silence. To say that this dinner was the most awkward affair was the understatement of the year.
"The century." I amended inwardly, resisting the urge to fidget uncomfortably amidst the furtive wary glances and rising tension. Never in my life would I ever thought that dinner could be such a stressful event, not with all the various mouthwatering delicacies available in the universe to satisfy my monstrous appetite and at this point of time, I decided that I would very much rather opt to have dinner with the president of some exotic country than to actually sit through this stress-inducing dinner.
"Liar." echoed my subconscious, "You would do anything for those whom you love, especially for these five."
I scowled inwardly at my alter-ego, annoyed by the clear clarity of the truth ringing out of her/my words. "Oh, shut up."
Ignoring the smug smile from subconscious-me, I resumed my focus onto my dinner company, tuning out the excited chatter of the hungry dinner crowd a floor below. As delicious as the food was, I couldn't find it in me to appreciate the ambience nor the alluring aroma of food drifting throughout the restaurant, I was wary of letting my guard down; afraid that the increasing tension would give rise to something irreversible the moment I do. And at this moment, I wasn't quite sure if a heated argument is as bad as a choice as it seems, compared to the terrible silence between the five Rising Gods Of The East.
"At least if they bothered fighting things out, it could be seen as a sign that they still care." I thought dryly.
Heechul, Sooyoung, Kyuhyun and Eunhyuk were trying their best to keep the conversation going, to fill the obvious silence with random chatting and corny jokes; a vain attempt to get any of the five to start talking- legit talking, not half-hearted one word answers, only to meet a brick wall over and over again.
I surveyed the five carefully as I chewed on my noodles with deliberate slowness, my heart strings tugging at the sight of how hard the lot of them were trying to appear inconspicuous, their eyes focusing on nothing but their plates; hearing nothing, seeing nothing.
Jaejoong had his shoulders hunched, as though he was literally trying to appear physically smaller, his famous large doe eyes shielded behind a curtain toffee brown hair as the singer pushed his half-eaten dinner around his plate. A forlorn smile ghosted my face as my gaze landed on Yunho who was coincidentally sitting opposite Jaejoong across the round marble table, the two were still remarkably in sync with the other regardless if they were aware of it or not. However, as heart-wrenching as it was to see the two who were the embody of confidence and charisma to be so vulnerably insecure, it was the other three that broke my heart the most.
The three younger members of the boyband were known to 'inhale' food, making all sorts of noises as they ate with gusto and to see them eat so painfully slow and quiet with their heads bent... I couldn't bear it.
Is there really nothing left but misery between them?
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NO ONE'S POV.
Heechul stifled a groan at his current predicament, cursing himself repeatedly for making that impulsive request a little over half an hour ago.
"Maybe it was wrong of me to assume that the time has finally come for them to get together... Perhaps, it was still far too soon to open those painful wounds..."
It was rare, almost non-existent for Heechul to fail in working his magic with the crowd. The diva had always prided himself in his abilities to diffuse any mounting tension that was thrown to his face, but clearly, judging from the current situation, it was as clear as day that the Super Junior member had overestimated his peacemaking capabilities.
Heechul grimaced slightly at his shallow thoughts, "Then again, even the most complex problem I'd dealt with is definitely considered to be trivial as compared to this. God knows that the whole DBSK fiasco took the term 'complicated' to a whole new level, hands down."
Turning his head in reflex to a movement caught in his peripheral vision, Heechul shared a despairing look with Yoona who looked equally distraught, conveying his own helplessness. The five were in another realm altogether, beyond the grasps of anyone; an instinctual act of self-preservation.
Yoona and Kyuhyun exchanged a quick worried look at the uncertainty in Heechul's eyes as the oldest pondered over his next course of action, unnerved that know-it-all Heechul actually had no answer for once. Just like the oldest, the duo were frustrated. This unexpected meeting was a God's gift, not that Heechul believed in the Man upstairs, the perfect chance to attempt in diluting the bad blood between the two parties and they sure weren't planning to let this golden opportunity slip past them just like that. Although, the fact that they were treading on eggshells around the unresponsive DBSK would suggest that their little mission was proving to be more of a challenge than they had estimated.
But little did the two pranksters knew that there was another reason altogether contributing to the frustration of Super Junior's diva. For the longest time, the idol had his suspicion about the infamous split; his ever reliable instinct tingled despite how perfect and seamless the puzzle pieces fitted together. After all, there wasn't such a thing as perfection, was there not? And this meeting might just be the little break Heechul needed to gain valuable insight on the messy break up. The diva understood the carefree nature of the trio, especially that of the Soulmates pair, understood the need for them to leave, the suffocation derived from being oppressed by a ruthless dictator, as well as the betrayal they felt when Yunho and Changmin did not follow them. The three belong to the skies, not confined to a small iron cage, not when their loved ones did not stand to benefit from their painstaking hard work. As the famous saying goes, 'Even a tame dog will retaliate when cornered' and retaliate the three did.
Yunho was loyal to a fault, everybody knew that. So it really wasn't all that surprising to Heechul that Yunho took up the revised contract. The man honors his promises, just as how Junsu honored his own; leaving the band should a member choose to leave. 'Pride and honour' and the righteous sense of protection towards his loved ones; the two Achilles heel of Yunho's. TVXQ was Yunho's sweat and blood, it made sense that Yunho would opt to turn back to protect his baby in times of darkness and uncertainty. Furthermore, it was also his safe haven; a familiar stability in rocky times. Besides, Changmin would never leave his leader to fend for himself. Yunho had practically raised Changmin during their years together, sheltering him from the brunt of darkness the entertainment industry entails and the youngest DBSK member would never forget that. On a side note, the duo were also justified at their anger towards the trio; the bitter feeling of abandonment. In all honesty, like it or not, all five had wronged one another in their own way and no one was innocent in this break up.
Their stories collaborated, everyone accepted the whole situation as it was... but Heechul just couldn't shake the nagging feeling that he was missing something, something important. Something wasn't right but he just couldn't put his finger on it. Heechul knew the answer had to be right in front of him and frankly, knowing that he was so close yet so far from the answer he was searching for truly frustrated the diva to no end. It wasn't as if Heechul hadn't attempt to probe or fish for information from both parties before, but his conscience held him back. He just couldn't put it past himself to delve into Jaejoong's brain knowing that his very action could serve to break his friend for good, nor could he find the heart to rip open the bloody wounds Yunho tried so hard to heal, and the fact that Changmin would clammed up immediately every time this topic was brought up hadn't help his cause at all. And so, Heechul uncharacteristically backed away, keeping his doubts to himself as he pondered on other alternatives to sedate his curiosity. Furthermore, following the DBSK spilt, Heechul had his own share of worries and heartbreak to deal with in 2011 and the whole matter was tossed into the back of his mind where it laid forgotten... until now.
"And perhaps, a hard shove is what they need instead of a gentle push." thought Heechul sinisterly, caught up in his own frantic obsession for answers.
The familiar glint in Heechul's eyes immediately had the other four's alarm blaring; a tactless Heechul up to mischief in this delicate situation was the last thing they needed. All it required was a little spark for everything to go up into flames, the combustion would be instantaneous, explosive and ugly. Just as Heechul was about to set his diabolical plan into motion, the Heavens intervened with one of its own; gone was the soothing folk melody blaring from the restaraunt speakers, and in its place were the beats of a familiar song... one that marked the start of the DBSK legacy.
"Haruman nibangui chimdaega dwegoshipo,
Oh baby.
Do dasuhi pogunhi nae pume gamssa ango jaeugo shipo."
Oh baby.
Do dasuhi pogunhi nae pume gamssa ango jaeugo shipo."
The response was immediate, having recognized 'Hug' the moment the first note left the speakers; gasps escaped from both Sooyoung and Yoona, even Heechul himself had inhaled a particular sharp breath while the others froze, morphing into statues in a matter of seconds.
Hearts pounding, no one dared to move; holding their breaths, unsure of what was to be expected now that the lock of the Pandora box had been opened. The non DBSK members darted uneasy glances between the five, gulping nervously, wary of setting off any ripple effects of any kind, terrified that the slightest movement will break the tenacious hold on the fragile peace they had established.
Therefore, it was to everyone's surprise that it was Jaejoong that had the courage to speak up first amongst them all and Yoona allowed herself a small smile, knowing that through it all, despite what others have to say, it was Jaejoong that was the strongest out of them five; for he was the steel pillar for the ever strong leader when they were five, was he not?
"W-wow. Talk about memories huh? How have you guys been? Ch-Changmin, Yunho."
The lot of them winced, positive that they hadn't heard someone call out HoMin's name in such an awkward manner before, re-enforcing the point that things have indeed changed since the last time the five met.
Yunho offered a small affable smile to his former band mate, ignoring the sting he felt over the awkward pronunciation of his name, "Good. You?"
Jaejoong returned Yunho's smile with a tentative one, allowing himself cautious optimism that things might be alright between them once more, "I've been good too..." Jaejoong trailed off as he tore his gaze from the almond shaped eyes he missed dearly to the mismatched ones that were avoiding his direction altogether, "Changmin...?"
Changmin jerked upright as he heard a familiar gentle voice call out his name again, caught off guard at the raw affection laced within the questioning tone. And when Changmin remained silent with a certain dazed look on his face, Kyuhyun and Yoona took it upon themselves to snap the DBSK maknae back to reality by pinching the tall man, hard. Changmin let out a surprised yelp before glaring at the two whom were studiously pretending that they hadn't done anything, "Fine. I'm doing great. Absolutely, fantastically great. Never better."
Kyuhyun and Yoona groaned inwardly, knowing that their best friend was being deliberately sarcastic while Heechul let out a small hiss. Jaejoong's smiley façade fell at Changmin's snarky reply and for the first time since HoMin joined the dinner table, Yoochun found himself glaring at something other than his glass of ice cold beer. Yunho shot his maknae a disapproving frown, whispering a soft but firm, "Manners, Minnie. Play nice."
Startled at the voice of authority that he hadn't heard in a long while, Changmin stared agape at his leader before returning Yunho's words with an annoyed look befitting of a rebellious defiant teen, grumbling inaudibly under his breath as he looked away from Yunho's challenging stare to spear bits of his food in defeat.
Yunho half-smiled, knowing that it was as close as an apology he could get from a bratty Changmin before diverting his attention to someone he once held dear to his heart as the image of a young Junsu offering a homeless Yunho his home years ago swam into his mind, Has it really been close to three years since they have last spoken to each other?
"So, I've erm.. watched the news. Congrats on winning Best Actor at the Korean Musical Awards, Junsu-ah! You did good! I... erm I'm happy for you."
Clearing his throat, Yunho fought the urge to squirm under the unblinking stare of Junsu's as the latter looked upon him silently with such wonder, as if the JYJ maknae hadn't quite believe that Yunho had actually spoken to him.
Eunhyuk was about to speak when Junsu cut his best friend off with four simple soft-spoken words, "Why didn't you leave?"
Both Kyuhyun and Sooyoung choked on their drinks, utterly unprepared for Junsu's question while the smile on Yunho's face gave way to shock. Astonished, Jaejoong cried out a loud "Junsu-ah!" as Heechul looked on like a scheming, opportunist rat waiting for the tiniest cookie crumble.
"Why didn't you leave?" reiterated Junsu, injecting a steel of resolve into his voice as he felt anger its way up his spine.
Jaws slacken, Yunho found his throat drying rapidly, incapable of formulating an answer for Junsu's unexpected question. "I-I..."
Eunhyuk gave an awkward chuckle as he placed a placating hand onto Junsu's arm, silenting pleading his best friend to stop, "I'm sure what my servant meant was---"
Changmin's eyes narrowed, protective of his leader whom was crumbling under Junsu's relentless questioning. "Why do you care? I was under the distinct impression that DBSK was something of the past for you."
Junsu balled his fists as he spun to meet Changmin's challenging stare head on. "Brat.", hissed Junsu.
Distracted by Changmin's interruption earlier on, Eunhyuk had just managed to recover his bearings in time to send the others a distressed look, pleading for someone to intervene, knowing that there was no stopping the ugly fight between the duo should the two youngest DBSK members decide to exchange blows, be it verbal or physical.
Yoona held onto Changmin, willing him to keep his temper in check while Jaejoong shot Junsu a mean look, looking very much like a mother reprimanding her disrespectful child before sending an apologetic look to Changmin, "We never once considered--"
"Lies." hissed Changmin, his anger doubling as forgotten emotions re-emerged, fueling his temper, "You guys didn't bother listening to us then, so why break the habit now?"
Jaejoong staggered, hurt filling his face at Changmin's words, at the hatred and bitterness swirling within the pair of eyes that used to look at him with such adoration and respect, "I did listen... right?"
A hurt Jae proved to be the last straw for Yoochun for the latter decided to speak up, unleashing his own cold fury against his former band mate's fiery temper. "Well, it wasn't as though you were all that innocent as well. All that bull about not receiving our calls and texts and not knowing that we were leaving, blaming our departure soley on greed and ambition... who's the liar now Changmin-ssi."
Changmin flinched at the formal tone of Yoochun's, the hurt of knowing that he was nothing more than a stranger to Yoochun piercing his heart. Yoona watched as a brief flash of hurt and regret fleeted across Yoochun's face when the latter witnessed Changmin flinched as if he was whipped by a lash.
Yunho stared at the scene unfolding right in front of him, felt his blood run cold at the sight of his nightmare materialize once more before him, unearthing the memories he buried so deep. He had done this to them, from the moment he made that decision that spring night in 2009.
Sooyoung bit her lower lip, her Cassie heart bleeding at the sight of her idol oppas going at each other's throat; every Cassie's worst nightmare.
"s." wheezed Changmin as he glared at the trio with such contempt, trembling as he fought for control over his emotions. You have no right, no right to judge us or to question us. You lost that right when you guys left without as much as a second glance, when you left without hearing--"
"Rights? Are you really questioning our rights right now?! We were supposed to fight for our rights together but you guys bailed on us! And for God's sake, do not play the victim card. We are as much as a victim as you are, or perhaps more so considering that we have SM hunting us like a bloodhound."
"Heol." whispered Changmin in disbelief, feeling his tears lining his eyes as the anger in him rose several notches. "I hate you guys so much right now, I really do."
A gasp escaped Jaejoong upon Changmin's words, feeling his own heart break along with Changmin's, powerless to help as he watched his two dongseangs fight it out. Junsu tensed before exhaling a shaky breath, "O-Oh yeah? Well, right back at--"
"Enough." commanded Yunho, unable to watch Junsu and Changmin tearing each other apart any longer.
Yoochun scoffed as Junsu gritted his words to Yunho, "I have my own free will, I'll say what I want to say."
A terse silence enveloped the five as the on-lookers watched on in horror, knowing that this wasn't their fight but desperate to intervene before they reached the point of no return.
"You know what, I'm done here. I had enough." decreed Changmin as he stood, nearly knocking his chair over with such force.
Instinctively, Yoona grabbed hold of Changmin, refusing to accept that their golden chance had ended on such a terrible note, "But Min..."
Already blinded by his rage, Changmin shook Yoona's arm harder than intended, resulting in the deer's arm to come into a painful contact with the round table.
"Do not man-handle her!" hissed Junsu as he too rose from his seat to check on Yoona.
"Is your arm alright?" questioned Junsu tenderly, as he turned Yoona's arm to check for bruises. Changmin, Yunho and Kyuhyun furrowed their brows in confusion, wondering when had the two gotten close again. The last time they heard, they knew Junsu didn't harbor much good feelings towards their Yoong. Heechul, Eunhyuk and Sooyoung traded a panicked look, knowing that things were going to go downhill fast now that the cat is out of the bag and it wouldn't take long for either of them...
A slow hiss escaped Changmin's lips as he pieced the puzzle pieces together, "You've been keeping in contact with them all these while, haven't you?"
Yoona gulped nervously under the intensity of Changmin's glare, alternating her glances between the irate Changmin and Yunho who was looking at her in a mixture of understanding and hurt, "I-I can explain--"
Changmin chuckled bitterly as he shook his head, "I can't believe it. God, I can't ing believe this." before walking out on all of them. Kyuhyun reached over, smiling as he squeezed Yoona's hands reassuringly before taking after Changmin, in fear that the lanky idol would get into trouble in his current state.
"Hyung..." whispered Yoona in dread as she heard the chair next to her screech against the wooden floor. Smiling down at the beauty, Yunho ruffled the top of Yoona's hair affectionately, "It's okay." and with that, Yunho took off after giving a curt nod to the rest of them.
Jaejoong watched longingly at the two empty spaces left behind by the departure of Yunho and Changin, replaying the scene of watching their backs growing smaller with each step they took and the JYJ member vaguely wondered if that was what the duo felt as they watched JYJ leave their dorms along with their respective suitcases.
"Well, that went well." muttered Heechul under his breath.
Yoona shot Heechul a withering look, "Really, Heechul oppa..."
Little did Yoona and the rest of her companions knew that this very night would prove to be start of the butterfly effect in all of their lives.
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Annyeong Yoroboon!
Wow, it has been awhile hasn't it? How have you guys been? :)
Honestly, I had a hard time with this chapter since I wasn't quite sure what I wanted or needed to achieve with the whole DBSK meeting again. Anyhoo, now that this nasty roadblock is out of the way, let's get this story on the road once more. Things will definitely move faster since we're about to embark on the 2013 of their lives. Hehe.
Sending my thanks to the latest subscribers; true_religion, morningdew66, lace_tracce, lollipopXcandy, insertname_here, its_me & YOONGIE_LUVER and also to those who left such kind encouraging comments! <3
PS: HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY YOOCHUNNIE!!♥
Kinda wanted to update this on his birthday but I've failed apparently,
so I shall just settle for being a week late. Heh.
"Our leader,Yunho... Changmin... Jaejoong... Junsu... and Yoochun. WE'RE THE ONE, ETERNALLY!"
-Yoochun; Kiss The Baby Sky, Tokoyo Dome- The Secret Code.
God, I love and miss you five so much.
See you guys soon,
xoxo, againhello.
08/12/17: Yes, it’s a legitimate chapter update. Trust me, I’m as surprised as you are. Enjoy!! :))
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