YOUR POV

The cold gust of wind hit me as I rushed out of my house. ‘He couldn’t have gone too far’. I ran down the road in my heels.

“Maybe I should’ve thought about this first. Stupid heels” I muttered to myself

It was dark, cold and the roads were slippery from the past rain. I was lonely, not dressed appropriately for this weather and I was in search of the one I love… ‘This was definitely not going in my favour’

I ran down streets with no sense of direction.  “HONGBIN!” I called out desperately

‘What was I thinking?’ It’s not like Hongbin was going to magically appear in front of my eyes when the last thing he heard from my parents was regarding our divorce. I was just… just so desperate. I lost him before and I really don’t want to lose him again.  A year without him was painful enough… what about if it was forever?

“HONGBIN…. Hongbin… H-hongbin please” I shouted into silence as I breathed heavily running out of breath. People passing me in their cars probably thought I was crazy… well than I guess the saying that love makes people crazy is right, in my case.

Tears began to form in my eyes as I lost hope. I stopped in my place on the sidewalk and tilted my head back not wanting the tears to fall. If I go back home now without Hongbin my parents would be even more frustrated, I’d have to marry divorce and even worse I’d have to accept that Hongbin and I weren’t meant to be. No… that’s crazy. When I first got into this arranged marriage I was thinking ‘Will this work?’ but now I just want to be him… with Hongbin. So no, I’m not going home… not going home.

“Home… home” I whispered to myself as my thoughts circled my head. “Our home…”

I rushed in the direction of the house Hongbin and I once lived in… our home. The place where I found peace because Hongbin was always by my side, the place where I felt like the luckiest girl on the planet and the place where I truly knew… I loved Lee Hongbin.  

The tears soon disappeared from my eyes as I saw some hope in going to our home. I smiled thinking of the best possible outcomes of me seeing Hongbin. ‘Of course he would accept me right?’ He wouldn’t have said those things at dinner if he didn’t still have feelings for me.

HONGBIN POV

I sighed as I sat down on a park bench across the road from my house… the one we used to share. I looked at the house. There was only one word to describe it… gloomy… Just like me. After ______-ah left it started becoming a dump. The flowers died and were replaced by weeds, the grass grew too long and the driveway began to rot away… kind of like our relationship. BUT the difference is… at least our relationship has hope… or so I thought before the dinner. Now we’ll have to divorce, she going to remarry and I’ll be alone just like the past year.

I would like to run after her… but what’s the point? Everyone says she still has feelings for me but I wouldn’t think so after all that I did to her in the past. As I said before my past is going to haunt me forever. Her parents obviously don’t want me in her life either so there’s really no reason except that… I still love her.

‘Her’…. There she was, running towards our home. She looked at me sitting on the park bench in awe and looked back at the house and then back at me. Our eyes met and we stared at each other for what seemed like hours. Her eyes filled with pain, determination and want.

“________-ah”

YOUR POV

“________-ah” Wait. That’s me. That’s my name. I shook away my gaze from his and looked towards the ground. He had sat up from his place on the park bench and was about to make his way to me but I ran without thinking, hugging him, feeling his warmth. It’s been so long… so long since I felt his warmth. Butterflies entered my body and a smile crept on my face. He stood there in complete shock, his arms straight by his side.

My warmth ended as I realised he didn’t hug me back.

“Sh-shouldn’t you be at home with Daehyun. Why are you here?” his voice was cold and I felt like someone was holding my heart and squeezing it in the palm of their hands.

“I… I don’t want to be with Daehyun” I whispered

“You don’t?” he said with some hope in his voice

I smirked at the glint in his eyes as he looked up at my words. “No…” I can say this “I want to b-be with you” I smiled at him now but his eyes diverted to the ground as he sat back down onto the park bench. ‘Why was he being like this?’

I stood there in my place as I watched him on the park bench…’ I want to hear an answer’…

“But… we can’t be together”

I stared at him. My mind filled with anger? sadness?... no just confusion.  I thought he wanted to be with me too and now he says we can’t be together. What happened to the Hongbin that changed from his selfish ways, the Hongbin that knew what I was thinking before I told him…

‘What happened?’

“why… why are you making this so difficult? I told you I wanted to be with you and now… now this!” I blew my face out of my hair in frustration. “I ran after you thinking you still had feelings for me… but I guess not”

I stared at him one last time before the tears filled my eyes and I became one of the many girls who had their heart broken by the one they love.

“Thanks for nothing. I should’ve just listened to my parents… but no I thought I was doing the right thing because I was too blind to see the real you”

After saying my last words I began to run. Just run as far away from him as possible. I thought you could only feel extremely heartbroken once… but for me it’s twice and from the same person, Hongbin. Once at home; when he told me about him and Maya and then the second time… is now.

“________-ah wait” he grabbed hold of my hand. I tried to break lose but he firmly held it. I winced in pain ‘no…. don’t… please no’

I stared at the floor wanting to leave this situation. ‘don’t find out… not now… not ever’

He slowly took my chin in his hand and made me face him. I saw the pain and pity in his eyes.

“H-how did I not notice this before?” he said feeling the cuts in your wrist. His fingers lightly traced them as he looked at me in sorrow.

I became silent. Tears slowly fell from my face to the cuts.

“Is this what your dad was talking about? Is this what you’ve been through because of me?”

My mouth wobbled as tears came surging down my face. I couldn’t mumble a word, I just didn’t want to look at his eyes anymore. He quickly embraced me like I wanted him to before. I stayed in his warm arms soaking his suit in tears.

“sorry…. I’m so sorry. I should’ve never done those things to you. I’m sorry” he whispered  into my hair as I continue to cry. His apologies made my heart warm again. My insides became fuzzy as he broke his embrace and lightly kissed my cuts, mumbling his apologies.

He cupped my face in his hands and made me look at him. “I’m so sorry. You don’t have to say anything now but I’m going to take care of you… like I should have” he hugged me again and my mind swam with a warm feeling. He kissed my forehead whispering apologies again. I could feel his sincerity as he placed his jacket on my arms. “I don’t want you to get a cold.”

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HELLO! Okay so this chapter was quite big I guess. BUT don’t think they are automatically going to be happy chappy NO it’s definitely still going to be a bumpy road which is probably expected seeing as they’ve been through a lot.

Also… this story is going to end soon… maybe like 5 or so more chapters. That’s if I can’t think of more plotlines ahaha but it will probably end soon. BUT I thank you so much for staying with this story despite me being a really slow updater ahahaha

I’m just going to mention the people who upvoted my story because that’s just amazing THANK YOU!!

hyesun-ah

1003dumz

BanaStarlight (omg we have the same fandoms!)

PurpleOwl

eisiou

zelomljk

dinarisna

Kpopmusic_lover

Baploves (I’m guessing you’re a baby? Haha me too)

MegaD246

yongnaja (love your display picture)

ANYWAYS I thank you all for commenting and subscribing. It really means a lot when I see a comment saying they like my story! LIKE WHAT? I actually never thought my story would be as great as you say it is. I have made so many mistakes in all of my chapters but I thank you for reading my story… BUT it’s not over yet and I will continue to (hopefully) update quickly for the remaining chapters.

Wow that was such a long author’s note :)