Present

=== 3 month later ===

Time flies really fast. Occasionally I lost the track of time. I busied myself with my drawing, my studies and my work. It helps me thinking other things aside from him. And I think I’m able to hold on here as long as the same thing wouldn’t happen again. After the small encounter with him on the first day I’m here, I didn’t found even a thread of courage to step my foot near the park anymore. I know he did not even notice that I’m there but my paranoia still covering my soul.

Everyday I go with the same routine. By morning before the sun show itself to people’s eyes, I already walk to the campus. All because of my habit avoiding people. I know those weird gazes always directed to me in the class, even at the hallway where I walk but I careless on whatever they say because I know I can’t shut people’s mouth. From the beginning I already make a choice to ignore this world that full of hypocrisy. Hard. It is hard but I’ve been through harder.

The art students rarely have class. We usually will be in our studio to finished the drawing and completing our assessments. However, unlike the other art students, I have classes because I’m taking extra credit hours for my core subjects from my previous campus. I’m not a geek. But I can’t give up the years that I invest to study business just for drawings. I enjoy to draw but to make it as my profession? I need to think it more.

During afternoon when the others rushing to the cafeteria for lunch, I would spent my time at the back of the campus. The steep hill doesn’t scare me, in fact I found it comfortable especially when the wind blew. I found out the place when I was looking for the routes that have fewer students take. The small tree there just made it everything perfect for me to hide and have a rest. There I would sketch random things but mostly I will only found myself defeat from the past event as my sketching always the same; an accident on the familiar deserted road to my house

At night I would work till my back hurt till my leg aches. I have non-fixed job since the past two years. After all I never work at the same place. Nowadays, I am attending a bar that is not so far from my house. The bar is not that big but I found it classy. It has its own charm and uniqueness. My previous co-worker introduced me the place when she heard me quitting. I am not that needed for money but I just found myself nodded at her and there I am. Serving alcohols and calling for taxi or substitute driver for drunken customers every night. And passed out during midnight because I of the tiredness con