You might not even read this. You might even just skip this. But to hell with all that, i'll still write this anyway. 

I remembered the day i first wrote this fan-fic. 
I remembered planning that this story will be just for me and no one else. 
That no one should be able to even see this story in light. 

I was happy with the thought of just being able to write something finally. Not my usual essay, or a poem, but a goddamn story. And hell i was so proud of it. 

I met a friend one day. She writes here too. And honestly, when you read the things she creates, they're all beautiful. I look at mine, and i find them like they're all trash. I wrote a bunch of stories really. But i threw them all away. Because they're not good enough for people to see. So anyway, she introduced me to this site and so i uploaded the first chapter of my story. 

From then on, more and more came and i grew more and more happy.  Because of all of you who still tried to read all of the i write, i continue to try and try to write. 

But one day. After all the un-finished stories i wrote, after all the people who subbed my stories. I just stopped. I couldn't write. I couldn't think. And everything just went black after that. Thats why i have been having irregular updates. Because i couldn't write anymore. I tried to, but they all came out as this pathetic things that i just end up throwing away. And honestly speaking, before i could update a chapter, believe me when i say that i have deleted it and re-written it at least 7 times. I just wanted to be good. I wanted to be better for everyone who reads the things i try to write. Because really though. Compared to everyone else, mine pretty much . And thinking about the plot, they're all cliché. So i just stopped. I became numb. I forgot how much i love to write, and how much i like seeing it when people say that they actually liked what i tried to piece out for them. 

I've focused so much on wanting to be better that what i do became bad. I love writing. I really do. So so much. But i just became so obsessed about becoming greater that i lost track of myself. I couldn't write because it was getting harder to please myself.

So i'm sorry. 

I'm sorry for leaving everyone hanging for so, so long. I'm sorry.  Some might not even read this because really though, who would read this? But i just wanna say, i'm sorry. 

I just realized now how much important you readers are to me today so i just have to tell you. Yes, i know this is cliché. Dumb even. BUT STILL. you guys just have to know why on earth i couldn't write my stuff anymore. You guys deserve to know.

Dont worry, this doesn't mean i ain't updating this. 
I will.
But not soon. 
I'm sorry. 
I still need time to get back to my usual self. 

But for now, goodbye~~ 

-Alice Dragneel