A/N : Happy belated birthday, Jong Dae oppa. I've celebrated your day yesterday by listening to all your songs/covers on repeat and I've donated to the Africa Water Project in your name and send you a few bracelets and hats through September Issue. This are little things I can do and here is my love song to you through a chapter. Thank you for constantly waiting for me my dear readers and I hope you love this chapter as much as I hurt writing it.

Jong Dae blinked furiously before shutting his eyes and counting to ten. He opened them again, vision focused solely on another boy his age holding out a birthday cake with a nervous smile—a smile Jong Dae has seen directed often to their seniors or instructors—but never to Jong Dae. He thought he was dreaming, blinking furiously and wiping at his eyes to clean the last remnants of sleep away. However, as his adjusted to the scene before him again, Jong Dae was forced to believe that yes, not only was Baek Hyun standing in front of him right now, he was holding a cake and repeating birthday wishes and walking too close to Jong Dae—invading his now non-existent personal space.

"Uhh-hi." Baek Hyun murmured while glancing down at the cake slightly. "I think you should—"

"Yeah, of course." Jong Dae replied quickly before moving forward to blow out the candles but Baek Hyun stopped him with a small whisper that Jong Dae couldn't quite catch. "What was that?"

"I said you should make a wish."

"I don't think I—"

"Make a wish, Jong Dae. You told me that wishes are important so make a wish, please." For a moment, Jong Dae saw that the patience Baek Hyun had for him was wavering and maybe he was finally ready to give up on Jong Dae. Jong Dae closed his eyes, and wished for the first thing that comes to mind before blowing out the candles. "Should I guess what your wished for? Is it the same as last year's?"

"No." Jong Dae said with evident sadness he didn't know was there. He's so used to the sadness and pain that it's numb in him and it takes moments like this to realize that he probably hasn't been truly happy in a while.

"Why not? Don't you want to be a successful singer?"

"I won't be—" Jong Dae started but then stopped himself quickly, "I can't wish for that anymore."

"You can't wish for that anymore." Baek Hyun repeated dumbly.

Jong Dae avoided Baek Hyun's gaze and looked at the cake instead. "That's a pretty cake, thank you. You just got out of the hospital, you shouldn't have went and got me a cake. How are you? I heard the hospital food were terrible. Not like I've been there before," I have to keep talking, Jong Dae thought to himself, keep talking to distract Baek Hyun, distract myself. "But people always complain about the hospital food anyway, so I guess it's no difference? When you were gone, they hired a new instructor with the funniest—"

"Just stop! Enough about the stupid cake! Enough with the fake small talks!" Baek Hyun put down the cake on a coffee table nearby and sighed deeply before looking up again. Jong Dae closed his mouth and shifted his gaze so that he wouldn't look into those eyes. He couldn't.

"It's not about the cake, I just got you one because we made a promise to always buy each other cakes on our birthdays as long as we are friends —god, we were sappy—so I got you this stupid cake. It's not...I'm not...it's not about the cake." Baek Hyun ended it quietly.

"I don't understand."Jong Dae said but maybe he did but he didn't want to so instead he stared at the little mannequin of himself made out of fondant on top of the cake to avoid dwelling on it.

"Can we please talk? Talk about what happened, about what matters because I… I think I deserve at least that… Don't I?" Baek Hyun voice went higher and higher as a speak; a little mix of whining and begging; he looked so lost while staring at Jong Dae that he could feel his resolve crumbling. Jong Dae couldn't look into those eyes. He couldn't.

"H-how many more comas do I have to be in before you tell me the truth?" Baek Hyun spat out with a mix of fear and anger that Jong Dae could feel a weight on where his heart should be. Baek Hyun took a step forward, hand outstretched as if to caress at Jong Dae’s cheek. And on instinct— fear?  — Jong Dae takes a small step back and then another. Baek Hyun simply sighs in resignation.

"Jong Dae, look at me. Stop avoiding me," Baek Hyun kept coming closer and Jong Dae retreated even further, "Look into my eyes and answer me."

"Baek Hyun, I can't. I'm sorry but I can't do this." Jong Dae panicked and tried to run but Baek Hyun was quicker, harshly grabbing onto Jong Dae’s wrist. "Let me go."

"No," Baek Hyun retorted angrily, "We are doing this. We are talking. Stop trying to run away from all your problems, Kim Jong Dae!"

Just then, the phone rang and Baek Hyun looked exasperated. Jong Dae retrieved his phone from the floor and the screen flashed with an incoming call from MINSEOK HYUNG. Jong Dae stared apologetically at Baek Hyun before answering the call. "Hello?"

"Jong Dae, it's me." Min Seok's voice was slightly muffled from static and people talking loudly in the background whereas Jong Dae's background was stiff and silent, almost painful.

"Hyung, is everything okay?"

"I'm sorry but I need you to come over right now. You know where my dorm is, right?"

"Yes but I'm kind of in the middle of something right now," Baek Hyun rolled his eyes at this. "Is it important?"

"Jong Dae, I think I found something." Min Seok sounded so relieved and tired.

"You mean—" Jong Dae stopped himself and glanced at Baek Hyun staring at him in confusion. He dropped his voice to a whisper. "Okay,