[title song: obsession by shinee]
[there's one very very very terrible pun ahead i strongly believe i need to warn you about it orz]

chapter 16;

Your hands won’t stop shaking. You can’t speak to Baekhyun, not now. You stare up at Minhee and Jessica, “I can’t do it. I can’t talk to him.”

Jessica looks so, so pale but what worries you most is how mechanical she sounds. “You have to act normal, unnie.”

“I. I can’t.” Your voice cracks and you’re clutching your phone so hard; your fingers are beginning to turn red.

“You have to.” Minhee replies, her voice barely a whisper, the pity in her eyes practically burning you.

You know she’s right. Baekhyun is. Baekhyun is EXO. He can’t know your true identity. You have to act normal. You have to.

So you take a deep breath, steadying yourself despite the way your heart won’t stop hammering against your ribcage, and you take the call. “Hello?” You answer, surprised at how normal your voice sounds.

“Sooyong-ah. You didn’t text me.” Baekhyun low voice whines and you unconsciously relax at the sound of it, imagining the way he’s probably jutting out his bottom lip as he speaks. But then you stiffen because Baekhyun is a part of EXO.

“Oh. I guess I forgot. When Jessica starts talking, she never stops.” You reply and you don’t know whether you should feel guilty or not for lying to him. You shouldn’t but you do.

Baekhyun laughs and you nearly drop your phone. . “So I wanted to ask you something?” Baekhyun says after a long moment of silence that’s so, so uncomfortable on your end.

“Go ahead.” You say, trying to sound casual.

“It’s about a joke.” Baekhyun speaks in a very nonchalant tone and it seems so wrong to you. Everything he does and says seems so fake to you.

“Your jokes aren’t funny.” You tell him when he lets the silence stretch on again.

“Sorry, hold on. Chanyeol’s asking me something.” Baekhyun says quickly. He sounds distracted and you can’t help but wonder if he’s at a meeting or something. Is that the reason why he and his friends are always in his basement? Your heart drops to the pit of your stomach when you figure that that’s probably exactly why they’re always at Baekhyun’s place and you have to force yourself to pay attention to him. “…can you believe that? Jongdae’s an .”

“Yeah. He is.” You respond, frowning, because you didn’t catch any of that.

“I’m going to tell you the joke and you have to tell me if it’s funny or not, okay?” Baekhyun says sounding distracted although you can detect a slight edge to it. “And if you don’t laugh I’m breaking up with you.” He adds playfully. You feel sick.

“Well, I guess you should break up with me now.” You respond in an equally playful tone, forcing yourself to calm down.

He huffs, indignantly, and you can practically see him pouting. “Okay, so. Where are otters from?” Baekhyun asks, his tone soft.

“Where?” You ask, frowning because this is so ing mundane. Jessica is making a face and Minhee looks so confused.

“Otter space.” Baekhyun responds and there’s exactly three seconds of startled silence before you burst into laughter, only because he just made a stupid pun and you’re so goddamn overwhelmed and on edge and your giggle just bubbles out of you. You’re vaguely aware of the fact that your laughter sounds almost desperate. But when Baekhyun joins in, your laughter dies away, and you think something about the way he’s laughing sounds forced. Or maybe it’s just that everything sounds like a lie to you now. You hate this so much.

“That was the worst pun ever.” You say, breathlessly.

There’s the sound of ruffling coming from Baekhyun’s end before he finally responds, “I think you meant best pun ever.” Baekhyun says, his voice a bit muffled. There’s another pause before Baekhyun continues. “Sehun’s being a brat. I have to go.”

“Oh, okay.”

“See you later.” Baekhyun says in a strained, cheerful voice. You frown because he sounds like he’s forcing himself to speak.

“Bye.” You respond and you’re barely halfway through the syllable when the line goes dead.

“It really is him, isn’t it?” Minhee asks, her eyes fixed on her laptop screen.

You nod, numbly, as you finally see every strange little moment in a new light. “That’s why he got Jess out of that warehouse so easily. Because that was EXO’s warehouse.”

“Wait, what?” Jessica looks up, her eyes locking with hers. “You knew that warehouse was EXO’s?”

Minhee frowns, eyebrows furrowed. “Yeah. Didn’t you know? We raided it and everythin—”

“No.” Jessica interrupts, eyes practically bulging out of her head. “You guys raided it? That was EXO’s warehouse? Why didn’t you tell me?”

“We didn’t want you to live through any of that again, Jess, so I guess nobody thought to bring it up. Why do you—”

“Because. Because I could have stopped this earlier.” Jessica exclaims despairingly, her eyes sliding over to you. Her words come out hitched, as if she’s just run a marathon. “I knew. I remembered who the boss was. Luhan. It was him. I just. I thought he was working alone. Sehun said...” You watch as Jessica’s angry expression crumbles and you can’t believe how ed up everything’s become. “I thought his friend’s didn’t know anything. I never. I didn’t even think to make the connection. About EXO. I could have. Everything could have been different. I. Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Stop it.” You shout and you’re aware that you’ve never raised your voice before, not to Jessica or Minhee…or Mina. You glare at Jessica, who looks as upset as you feel. “Stop it. Stop blaming yourself. Please, just stop.”

There’s a long stretch of silence before you where the three of you just stare at each other. You could hear a pin drop in your bedroom at this rate. “Whose fault would it be, then?” Jessica finally speaks and her voice is soft and emotionless.

“EXO’s.” You reply, giving her a hard look.

Minhee crosses her arms and gives you a serious look, her short hair falling out of her bun and into her eyes. “You don’t have to do this, Sooyong-ah. You don’t have to—”

“But I do.” You reply, ignoring the twisting feeling in your chest. “EXO hurt us and I’m not going to stand for that. Even if…even if they are—were—our friends. They don’t know our real identities but we know theirs and we can use that to our advantage. What’s that saying again? ‘Keep your friends close and your enemies closer’. We just need to act normal and they’ll play right into our hands.” You nod, your smile feeling tight, “This will make it easier for us to take them down.”

“Then what about Baekhyun?” Minhee questions, her eyes still trained on you.

You shrug, trying for nonchalance although you’re sure you look a bit stiff. “He’ll slip up. I’m sure of it.”

“You should just break up with him, unnie. You don’t have to put yourself through this.” Jessica sighs, tiredly. “Your feelings are—”

“I don’t care about him.” You say, cutting her off, anger bubbling up in your chest. You’re angry, not at Jessica, but at Baekhyun, at yourself. “I don’t care about Byun Baekhyun.”

You wonder how many times you have to tell yourself that until it becomes the truth.

~.~.~.~.~

“So where’s Baekhyun?” You ask, as casually as you can as you pick up your chopsticks.

“That’s the fifth time you’ve asked us that in the last fifteen minutes.” Jongdae raises his brow at you and Kyungsoo rolls his eyes from where he’s sitting beside him. “Are you getting a bit ua—yah, don’t throw food at me!”

You give him a sweet smile. “Then stop being nosy.”

Jongdae frowns at you, swiping a hand across his face, his pout resembling a duck’s. He looks kind of cute and you can’t help but wonder what his job was at the meeting on Friday. Your eyes zero in on his earring and you wonder if Jongdae is Chen. It seems almost impossible to imagine, but you know that it’s not impossible, not anymore. You have to force yourself to look away from Jongdae, not missing the way he narrows his eyes at you, ever so slightly. Before Jongdae can respond Chanyeol grins, his eyes twitching creepily. “Baek’s buy—”

Chanyeol cuts himself off, his gaze hovering over a spot just over your shoulder, and you glance back, curiously. You can’t help but smile, your heart fluttering in your chest, because it’s Baekhyun. You haven’t seen or spoken to him for two days, already, and you kind of missed him, his voice and his touch and his kisses. But then you notice the scowl on his face and you remember those words he said in his kitchen, when he thought you were still upstairs. ‘We’ll ing kill them.’ He wants to kill you. You have to remember that. You have to remember that you don’t really care about him anymore. You don’t care about Byun Baekhyun.

The chair beside you is pulled back with a long, drawn out screech that makes you flinch. Baekhyun slams his bag onto the table and you blink rapidly, turning to frown at him. He freezes, his jaw tensing, but he doesn’t look at you. He just continues to eat his food in an incredibly aggressive manner that would have been funny at any other time. His elbow hovers near yours, but the two of you aren’t touching. “You seem happy.” You comment a little sarcastically a moment later.

There’s a snort coming from Luhan, who’s seated next to Chanyeol and won’t take his eyes off his phone. You narrow your eyes at him and have the sudden urge to punch him. The tension at the table begins to rise and Chanyeol coughs awkwardly, changing the subject to something about a girl group’s latest comeback and when he starts to gush about legs, you tune him out.

“Baekhyun?” You try again because you’re trying for normal and normal you would be incredibly worried (current you is not worried about him).

He finally looks at you and you blink in surprise because he looks so angry. His jaw is clenched and his dark eyes flicker between yours before he promptly looks away. You frown.

“Why does it feel like someone just died?” Jongin’s voice cuts through the tension. You look up and you catch Jessica’s eye, who’s managed to school her expression into a completely blank one. She raises a single eyebrow at you, questionably, and you shrug slightly in response. Jessica doesn’t sit next to Jongin and Sehun like she’d normally do, instead she makes her way around the table and sits beside you. Sehun throws the two of you an amused look, his cold eyes lingering on you for a lot longer than necessary.

“I think his kimchi is dead.” Chanyeol says, offhandedly, eyeing Baekhyun as he stabs at his lunch. Jongdae laughs and Kyungsoo promptly smacks his arm. And awkward silence seems to settle over the table and you get the sudden feeling that something is very, very wrong. There are too many silences and too many secretive glances when someone thinks you’re not looking and you don’t like this. You don’t have a good feeling about this. You grip your chopsticks, your frown deepening as you stare at your lunch. Then you push back on the table, your chair scraping across the linoleum tiles, a shrill squeak echoing in your ears despite the loud buzzing of the conversations of students around the cafeteria.

“Um. Are you okay?” Kyungsoo asks, politely, his wide eyes boring into you as he speaks slowly, like he’s talking to a child.

You point behind you, a little flustered before you remember that you’re a mafia boss. You’re not supposed to get flustered by a bunch of boys staring at you. Especially boys who are secretly in their own dangerous mafia. “I just remembered there’s a meeting I’m supposed to be at in five minutes.” You say, smiling sheepishly.

“Sit down.” Baekhyun finally speaks in a low, dangerous tone without looking at you.

You blink at him in astonishment before you purse your lips. “No, I have a meeting.”

“I said sit down.” Baekhyun actually orders in a clipped tone. You glare at him because he’s ordering you around and why the does he think he’s allowed to that? What the ?

“Excuse me?” You cross your arms and wish your glare could burn holes into him. If there’s one thing you hate, it’s being told what to do.

Baekhyun still won’t look at you when he speaks, his voice cold. What the is his problem? If anyone should be acting like this, it should be you. “You—”

“Baekhyun.” Jongdae says in an uncharacteristically warning tone.

“No, oppa. Let him continue. I want to know what the his problem is.” You reply, turning on Baekhyun.

“Baekhyun, don’t. Kris said—”

And then Baekhyun laughs bitterly, ignoring Kyungsoo. Instead, he pushes out of his seat and turns to face you. The look on his face terrifies you, your heart hammers in your chest erratically. He’s angry, his eyes are flashing and his fists are clenched into tight fists, but there’s also a flash of betrayal, of grief, of hurt, of emotions you completely understand because you’ve been constantly bombarded by them for two days now. “You’re lying to me.” Baekhyun says, his tone sending shivers down your spine.

Suddenly you want to hug him. You want to stop this from happening. You want to erase the pain and rage and sadness from his eyes.

But at the same time, you want to punch him. You want to make him disappear. Because of Gyujin Ahjussi. Because of Minhee. Because of Jessica. Because of Mina. Because you trusted him so much and he’s been lying from the very start.

And you’re sure he feels the same exact way.

You’re sure he knows.

There’s movement behind Baekhyun and you don’t miss the way everyone stiffens, the way Sehun just smirks at you, his lips curling up into a knowing smile.

You look up at Baekhyun and you speak softly, Jessica’s arm brushing along your right elbow comfortingly. “You’re lying to me, too.”

Once those words leave your mouth his entire demeanor changes. He’s still angry, but there’s something almost professional to it, now. He’s not angry anymore, he’s dangerous.

You watch as Baekhyun yanks open his back pack and digs through it, his eyes never leaving yours. You watch as he dangles an object between his delicate fingers distastefully, his mouth twisted into an awful, empty smirk that almost makes you flinch. But you just stand there, arms crossed, refusing to show weakness.

He’s holding lipstick.

241 able Lilac.

“I believe this is yours, babe.” Baekhyun says with a lopsided smirk that makes you feel sick to your stomach.

---

a/n: im going to warn you that things are only going to get angsty and dramatic before it gets better (except there will definitely be lil bits of fluff and jokes and banter and and ACTIONNN because i'd die if i have to write straight angst for who knows how long)

about the chapter~

they all know holy shisus

and baekhyun is mad welp

SO since we're reaching the home stretch of this fic I'm going to blackmail everyone (am i allowed to do that??)
       --  here's the dealio: If this fic reaches 50 upvotes I'm going to write a bonus chapter from Baekhyun's POV (most likely involving the details of how they found out Sooyong's identity) (or anything else you wanna read about??) because I'm an evil authornim (i am sorry)

As always comment, subscribe, and upvote <333

xo