Junjin's P.O.V.


"Are we still going to play?" Dongwan asked. "Junsu, Changmin and Yoochun left, so..."

"Yeah and it's half past eleven." Jae added glancing at the clock. We all nodded, agreeing that we should stop the game.

"Anyone wants more cake?" Hyesung asked getting up. I nodded and turned back to Yunho. He was still sitting next to me, but it seemed like he was avoiding me. He was doing his best not to look at me.

"Yunho?" I asked, moving closer to him.

"Yeah?" he replied, still not looking at me. I put my hand on top of his, feeling him stiffen, but he looked at me and smiled. He was trying so hard and it was so obvious. "Is something wrong, Jin?"

"No." I shook my head quickly and frowned, looking down. "Can I just... lean on you?" I asked looking up at him. I meant both literally and figuratively. I needed his support. I needed him.

When did I become so attached?


JaeJoong's P.O.V.


Minwoo left to change the music, while I got up and moved to the couch.

"Jae..." he smiled as he walked over to me and stopped in front of me. "Wanna dance?"

I hesitated, thinking about that party two months ago.

"Come on, it's just a dance." He added.

Well... I was drunk then and tonight I made sure not to drink so much. So, it really won't harm me.

"Okay." I replied, standing up and grabbing his hand.

He grinned, putting his arms around me and pulling me closer as we started to dance.

"You still don't trust me." He started. "I don't blame you, I told you that already. It's really... understandable." I watched him.

"Minwoo..." I decided to speak. He looked quite devastated and I felt bad. "I don't know what to say to you. Sometimes you act like a complete jerk and we all know what you did and I just... I don't like you at all because of that." I said looking at him. He nodded looking down. "But sometimes you act and especially speak like a completely different person. You confuse me, I absolutely don't know what to think about you."

"Everything I said tonight and that day when we arrived here and before that, when I came to your and Yoochun's room. It's all true." He said softly, looking back up at me. "I am something else. Most of the guys, including you, don't know the real me. And most of the guys probably never will."

"But then... if you're trying to... to make me like you... why don't you just show that side of you to me?" I asked finally.

"Because you don't trust me Jae." He replied. "You don't want to forgive me for what happened. Hyesung and Dongwan did, so how come you can't?" He was right. I couldn't get over the fact that he left Hyesung just like that, hurting him. Because he decided to chase after me? On some level, I actually blamed myself for that. I felt guilty.

"I just... can't." I whispered looking away from him. He sighed. I understood it then. He was waiting. Unlike most of his flings, something about wanting me made him different. He was actually waiting for me. But I couldn't get over my fear.

"Happy new year." He suddenly said to me.

"Happy new year." I replied leaning down and placing a kiss on his cheek. He let go of me as I stepped back and started hugging the rest of my friends.

I felt guilty and hurt, but most of all, I was scared. I was already falling for him and I knew. If I let go, if I fall, will he be able to catch me?


Yoochun's P.O.V.


"Marshy..." I smiled kneeling down and looking at the dog in front of me. "What am I going to do?" she looked up at me, titling her head slightly and I chuckled. "You're clueless, aren't you? But he's your daddy." He'll never be mine. I shut up, caressing the adorable dog and just thinking about it all. I was so jealous and hurt. I knew I had no right. But everything Eric said and did tonight just made me feel worse. Knowing he wanted me as much as I wanted him just made my life seem more miserable.

"There you are." I heard him behind me. He stepped forward, kneeling on the other side of Marshy and looked at me. "Why did you leave?"

"I felt like it." I shrugged. "I wanted to spend some time with Marshy, she's all alone on New Years Eve." I smiled not looking away from the dog.

"Oh, well, maybe I should leave you two alone." He joked.

"Maybe." I whispered.

"Are you mad at me?" he asked suddenly, turning serious again. "I know I might've gone too far with what I said tonight, but... I'm sorry Yoochun."

"I'm not mad at you Eric." I replied standing up to go back to the living room. He stood up as well, stopping me. I could hear guys counting already.

"It's new year." He said. "Can I just... kiss you?" he blushed at that, while I felt my heart aching again.

Slowly, I nodded and he stepped closer, putting his hand on my waist. I rested my hand on his shoulder as he pressed his lips against mine. Closing my eyes I gave in, kissing him back. We pulled away after some time and I stepped back.

"Happy new year." I said.

"Happy new year." He replied. "Yoochun..."

"Don't." I cut him off shaking my head. "Let's just... not talk about it." I whispered turning around and walking back into the living room.

I was weak. I knew I was... but I couldn't resist it. I was terrible, but there will be time when I'll be able to torture myself with thoughts about Eric and my brother. Tonight was just not one of those days.


Hyesung's P.O.V.


I gave all our friends another piece of cake and walked into the kitchen to cut me some. As I took a spoon I glanced over my shoulder and smiled at Wannie, who was leaning against the door.

"Hey." He smiled walking in.

"Hey." I replied, grabbing some cake with a spoon and placing it in my mouth.

He walked over to me and wrapped his arms around me from behind. I smiled to myself. Everything he said tonight made me feel amazing. But there was still that doubt. I chose not to think about it for now.

"You know, I still haven't tasted that cake." Wannie said into my ear and I chuckled.

"You're such a liar. You already ate two pieces." I replied.

"Did not. Junsu and Yunho took them from me." Yunho. I frowned.

"So... I was wondering if you would give your bestest friend a piece of it." He continued.

"Of course." I said swallowing a sigh and grabbed the knife to cut some more cake. His hand stopped me.

"I want to share with you." He whispered again and I looked back at him. "Please?" he gave me a puppy eyes look and I smiled nervously, turning around and picking up my plate and offering it to him. "My hands are kind of busy now." He continued, not taking the plate, but instead moving his hands along my waist. "Sungie... come on, give me some of that cake." He whispered kissing my ear and I closed my eyes, trying to control myself.

I took some cake with the spoon and slightly turned over to him, feeding him. It to see him like that, pressed against me while I was giving him the sweet treat. He closed his eyes, letting out a small moan of enjoyment and I my lips, watching him sigh contently.

I ate more cake as well and soon the piece was gone. Wannie rested his head on my shoulder and continued to caress my sides and waist, pulling me even closer. I put the plate down and leaned against him, putting my hands on top of his as he traced feathery kisses along my neck.

"Ten... nine..." I heard the guys counting already. I smiled, turning around, Wannie's arms still around my waist. "Seven... Six..." they continued.

"I love you." I smiled looking at him and putting my arms around his neck.

"Four... three..."

"I love you too Sungie." He replied.

"One!"

We kissed. I buried my hand in his hair as he tightened his hold on my waist. It didn't last long and before I knew it he was looking at me.

"Happy new year." He said smiling.

"Happy new year." I replied, hugging him tightly.

Even if it was just for tonight, even if it meant nothing to him... To me this was the best way of welcoming new year. I decided to enjoy it without questioning anything.


Yunho's P.O.V.


Junjin was leaning against my chest, my legs were on either side of him and under different circumstances I would be the happiest guy alive. If only he liked me back. But that wasn't the case and I was drowning in self-pity, perhaps for the first time in my life.

I glanced at Heechul and Donghae who were laying down on the couch, making out and looking just so... happy. It made me uncomfortable. Not because they were freely expressing affection in front of all of us, but because they were in love just like me. The difference was that they were happy to be together, while I was spending time with the person I fell for and he was clueless.

"Yunho?" he called me again. I looked down at him. "Are you alright?"

"Of course I am." I lied, smiling and hugging him. I was making myself sick. I was lying, I was doing everything to avoid more pain. I lied to him, but I lied to myself too. And I was feeling like a miserable character from some tv drama. Just... ridiculous.

And just like before, he didn't say a thing. I wanted him to say something. It was so obvious I wasn't alright and maybe I was selfish and totally conceited, but I wanted to hear him ask what's wrong. I wanted him to finally pay attention to me. Of course, he didn't.

"Ten... nine..." Heechul and Donghae stopped kissing and started counting down. Junjin smiled and joined them, while I just waited. I waited for another year to come. At this point I wasn't sure if it'll change anything. I didn't know what to expect from it or what to wish for.

So far, I learned that sometimes there were just some things that you couldn't change no matter how hard you tried. My relationship with JaeJoong was clear example of it. I did my best, it didn't work out. There were some things that didn't depend of me.

However, that didn't mean I'll give up trying.

"Happy new year." Jin said turning in my arms and giving me a kiss on the cheek.

"Happy new year." I gave him a genuine smile.

New year. New start? Changes.

Changmin and Junsu hated them.

Jaejoong and Minwoo were afraid of them.

Dongwan and Hyesung were looking forward to them.

Eric, Yoochun and I wanted them.

Junjin...